I cannot help the fact that I am a daughter of a traitor, who was the son of a traitor. So, I know exactly what everyone thinks of me.

That I will grow up and be a traitor.

Now, let me ask you. Is that really fair?

Sure, Tigerstar almost killed Bluestar, brought dogpacks into the forest to eat our cats, brought BloodClan into the forest, and had many cats killed off in barbaric and unethical ways. And then my father was ready to be the echo of all that horror and terror, to rule the Clans, and be feared and respected.

Well, then, I guess there's not much hope for me then, is there?

And it doesn't help I look very much like my father, grandfather, uncle, and cousin over in ShadowClan. Even though I may be a she-cat, I have the same unusually long front claws, broad shoulders, and dark tabby pelt.

Only my eyes are violet, a pure purple, like my mother.

How can I be a monster? I don't even want to be leader; I lack the confidence that I'd make a good leader!

. . .

Or was I just trying to convice myself?

Was I afraid of the truth?

My family seemed to have a legacy of being traitors; you can never escape a family curse. And no matter how much I try to convice myself that I am ethical and would never commit such treacherous, disgusting and disgraceful actions, I will never believe myself until the day I see StarClan cats descending from Silverpelt and hear them whispering in my ears.

Sad, isn't it? That I must look forward to the day that I die to be absolutely sure I understand that I'm not a murderer.

But that's what my father and grandfather would have wanted, isn't it? For me to try and conquer the forest again, but I knew how the story ended. Tigerstar and Hawkfrost died trying, and no doubt I would, too.

So, then. . .maybe I didn't have to die to know I wasn't a murderer, because I could be dying as a murderer, or someone trying to be.

But isn't it such a shame I hate my own lineage. My mother is no longer a part of the living world; she hunts in StarClan now, but is gracious enough to visit me in dreams, which always turn to nightmares of my father once she returns to StarClan.

So, who do I turn to for advice on such a precarious and sensitive topic? I know better than to go to my leader, Mistystar, and complain that I'm concerned that I may one day murder a Clanmate; or any cat for that matter. My father is the source of my discomforts, and not only that, he is deceased.

And I dare not refuse Tigerstar.

Even on those rare occasions, does he grace my unconscious mind with horrid scenes and terrifying images.

Of me.

Killing Mistystar.

And the deputy, Reedtail.

And my aunt and the medecine cat, Mothwing. . .

Mothwing!

Who better could I talk to about such secret fears and the revelations of what torture Tigerstar and Hawkfrost put me through in my dreams. She knew what a fool, what a complete moronic idiotic retarded fool, he had been, and how her brother followed.

I wonder if she ever secretly wished she could bond with her half brother and sister, Brambleclaw in ThunderClan and Tawnypelt in ShadowClan, or if she felt any sense of kinship towards them at all. All they shared was Tigerstar's blood.

But then again, they had something Hawkfrost and Tigerstar lacked.

Loyalty.

So, why can't I be like my kin? Mothwing turned out alright, except for being an atheist and not beleiving in StarClan. She's a medecine cat; she couldn't possibly keep that position and be a murderer.

And Brambleblaw was deputy, but he showed who his loyalty was to after he set Firestar free and killed Hawkfrost. . .my father. . .

It surprises me slightly that my uncle killing my father doesn't anger me in the slightest; just disappoints me it had to come to that. And Tawnypelt, my fierce yet kind aunt in ShadowClan, has done nothing to suggest she is a traitor.

But then you mention she left ThunderClan to be with Tigerstar in ShadowClan?

Tawnypelt couldn't take the guilt she felt because Tigerstar was a traitor; feeling her Clanmates gazes when they remembered she was his daughter. How could she bear the indignities to know her father was a traitor?

I do not blame her for leaving ThunderClan.

I do not blame Mothwing for being atheist.

I do not blame Brambleclaw for killing my father.

I do not blame Hawkfrost for following in Tigerstar's pawsteps.

I blame Tigerstar for setting those pawsteps and following them, and influencing his children, and their children.

I wonder if Tigerkit in ShadowClan, Tawnypelt's son, is having the same issues as me. . .

And I wonder if Tawnypelt has told him about his grandfather. . .

I hope he makes the same decesions as me.

And ends this horrible legacy.