I don't own iCarly or its characters. I'm just playing with them.

-Freddie-

She walked away. I watched her walk away.

"Sorry."

"It's cool."

Okay, so I've always imagined a girl grabbing me and passionately kissing me. But most of those fantasies involve me grabbing her back, dipping her, showing her the kiss of her life, James Bond like. And they also usually don't involve Sam. Well some of them have, but I try not to think too much about those.

"It's cool."

I could have said and done a million and one things and I chose to stand there like a limp fish and then utter probably the most un-cool words to say after a kiss.

No wonder she walked away, idiot.

But why do I care? It was Sam…I don't want to look cool for Sam. I don't want to sweep Sam off of her feet.

But if I didn't, then why were my first thoughts about how much more awesome I could have been?

Jesus Christ, Sam kissed me. Sam freaking Puckett kissed me.

I took two awkward steps back and felt the brick wall rubbing my shirt. I let my shaking legs collapse and I slid down to sit on the concrete.

What did it mean? Why did she kiss me? Was she confused? She had to have been, that was the only way she would have ever-…I mean, it was pretty dark outside, maybe she thought I was-maybe she fell on the way out and hit her head and was delusional…

I groaned and let my head fall in my hands.

Benson, pull yourself together! It was just a kiss!

The second time we've kissed…or third, I'm still a little bit shaky on the whole Melanie thing.

To me, it seems odd that being friends, we've kissed that many times without having feelings for each other.

But she probably doesn't have feelings for me. There's no way a girl like her could ever like nerdy Fredward-…what the hell am I saying?

Girls trip over themselves to talk to me, I'm Freddie fucking Benson, adorable tech nerd of iCarly. I'm a celebrity. When I do that vampire voice on iCarly girls practically pass out. I'm not dorky Frednub anymore, I'm Freddie Benson, The Man.

But…why don't I feel like Freddie Benson, The Man around her? Why don't I feel like Freddie Benson, The Man right now…?

Ugh! I hate her! I hate her. I think, stupid me for thinking, that I finally have that girl figured out. That we're on good terms, that we've matured. She's mean to me, but that's just because we're friends, so I'm mean back. And she's not even as mean as she used to be! It will just be a Fredass here or a punch to an arm there, nothing just plain insulting like we used to be back in the middle school and freshman days. It may not make any sense to anyone at all, but I understood it. I had come to understand the exotic creature that is Sam.

And when I finally get it, she blows it all to hell!

Here I am feeling self conscious, thinking that a girl is too good for me (a girl who is one of my best friends and I usually think of as a rude, selfish pig who only thinks about eating and violence) and she kissed me! How does she do that?

And why do I care if she has feelings for me or not…?

And why do I wish I had stopped her as she awkwardly turned her back and practically ran back inside? And why do I wish I had kissed her back? Why do I wish Freddie Benson, The Man took over and had swept her off her feet?

Because I'm crazy and that's the only explaination. And I'm a teenage boy with raging hormones whose been girlfriendless for about 6 months and needs an outlet for all this built up sexual tension.

Right, it's because of that.

Because I don't have feelings for Sam Puckett. And she doesn't have feelings for me.

Even though she kissed me…

But! She apologized for it, so that cancels it out. We're fine, everything's fine, we'll laugh about this and go back to normal.

"Freddie!"

"What?" I jumped, having been pulled out of the deep internal conversation I was having.

Brad looked down at me, his eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

"Uh…are you okay?" he asked.

I jumped up.

"Yeah I'm fine, everything's fine. I'm fine. Why do you ask? Are you not…fine?" I rambled.

His eyebrows got even closer together.

"Uhm…you just looked like you're going to throw up…but, anyway, I've been looking for you everywhere. I need help with MoodFace, it keeps changing colors and now its beeping, and I've been looking for Sam, but-."

Sam. MoodFace. Her MoodFace was love! SHIT! I completely forgot about that!

Is Sam in love with me…?

"Freddie? Freddie…? Freddie!" Brad reached out and gave me a little push.

"What? What?" I jumped back and hit my head on the wall. "Shit! Ow!"

I reached up and rubbed my head.

"Dude, what the hell is wrong with you? You're acting like you've seen a fucking ghost or something. Did you even hear what I said?" Brad looked at me like I was a mental patient.

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and pulled a little bit of Freddie Benson, The Man out.

"No, I'm fine…just feeling a little bit under the weather. And sorry, what did you say?"

Brad looked at me for a moment, and then said, "I ran into Sam and asked her where you were and she punched me in the stomach. So she wasn't much help. I don't know how these Ridgeway lock-ins usually work, but its different than all of the other ones I've ever been to."

I smirked, the thought of Sam punching Brad in the stomach gave me some weird satisfaction.

"That's Sam for you." Sam. What the hell am I going to do about Sam? I pulled even more of Freddie Benson, The Man out, and pushed thoughts of Sam away to be explored later. "Well, let's go look at the Pear Pad, we only have three more hours left."

Brad sighed and shook his head. "Alright," he said, "let's go."

Brad turned around and opened the door to go back into the art hall of Ridgeway and I followed trying to not let the thought of Sam and of…the incident…to swallow me whole.

I'm baaaaack!

This little idea has been in my head since I watched iOMG and probably had the biggest freakout of my life. I'm super excited to see how Dan is going to take Sam and Freddie now, but I had to write what I would want to happen, and because I want to explore Sam, Freddie, and Carly's thought of the kiss.

I don't know how long I'm going to make this, if it's just three one-shots or it's a full multi-chapter fic, but I just had to get it out of my brain and on to paper. And I promise it will be more than just this one chapter.

Sooo, I hope you enjoy!

Lucy