This is kind of a parody of Naruto Chapter 140, in the first few pages where Orochimaru's cursing Sandaime Hokage (Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi to those that don't get it) for injuring his arms, and Itachi for being too strong, forcing him to resort to Sasuke.
Disclaimer, etc.
Orochimaru-sama hadn't been well lately. It wasn't just that his arms were paining him, the wait for his new vessel was taking it's toll on him.
As Orochimaru-sama's personal medic, Kabuto bore the brunt of his frustration. Now, Kabuto was generally on call 24/7, but with Orochimaru's condition, he hadn't gotten much rest, or even much of a break. So it was understandable that one day he just *snapped*.
"That's my hand." Orochimaru said, sitting in his evil chair, directing pain-filled evil looks at anyone within thought range.
"Yes, Orochimaru-sama."
"That's my old Akatsuki ring."
"Yes, Orochimaru-sama" Kabuto sighed, "You told me yesterday."
"I hate Itachi because he's totally awesome and beat me without flicking an eye." Orochimaru continued as though Kabuto hadn't spoken.
"Yes, Orochimaru-sama." Kabuto began to look for an excuse to escape.
"Now I have to settle for a gullible brat."
An annoyed Kabuto, having just recently offered himself as a vessel for transference, manages a somewhat forced "Yes, Orochimaru-sama." but Orochimaru just talked right over him.
"Weak, too, needing training, a serious attitude adjustment," Kabuto had to jerk his hand away from his kunai pouch, turning the motion into an adjustment of his sash.
"..And he has only just awakened his sharingan."
Oh, so we're talking about Sasuke-kun, thought Kabuto, mentally breathing a sigh of relief when he tuned back in to the still grouching Orochimaru.
"He probably hasn't even hit puberty yet."
"Yes, Orochimaru-sama. And his hair is too short." Kabuto added, happy to join in the Sasuke-bashing.
"True, but it's no shorter than yours, Kabuto." Twitch. To be compared to that little-! Kabuto quickly made signs. Kuchiyose! Snake summoning! His previous anger hadn't dissipated yet, apparently.
"Manda-sama, please eat him for me." *bows* "I will give you plenty of sacrifices!"
"That is my hand."
"...Never mind the bribe, I will eat him anyway." Manda quickly gulped him down.
"Yay! Now he cannot annoy us anymore!"
muffled- "Did I mention that is my hand over there?"
"Darn, forgot about that other dimension." Kabuto snapped his fingers. Which gave him an idea..
"No matter, I will get Sasuke to go and kill him!"
"Hey, bring me back a prisoner!"
I am a new writer, hello ^^
Poor Orochimaru gets eaten then killed by Sasuke, kukuku..
And I thought I liked Orochimaru-sama, too..
Please R&R, or my writing may get even worse, Oh Noes!