We used to go shopping all the time, and hang out, and check out guys at the beach. Having a gay brother is great – when he's around. It's been too long since I've seen him, which isn't right especially because of how close we are.
"Merry Christmas, Paige!" Marco tells me with Ellie following him into the room. They are sending me off, and we'll be separated for a little while. It's going to be strange, considering I see them every day. I'll miss both of them a lot.
"You too, hon," I say with a smile, embracing him in a tight hug.
Ellie and I stand in front of each other awkwardly for a few seconds, and then I finally say, "Come over here, hon." Opening my arms, Ellie makes her way over, we hug, and smile at each other.
"I'll miss you both," I tell them.
"We'll miss you too, Paige!" Marco says to me, hugging me one last time.
"Yeah, we really will," Ellie says with a smile as I bend over to pick up my bags.
"I'll see you both before New Years'. We'll ring it in together!" I say as I open the door and start to step out. They wave to me, and I make my way into the cold Canadian winter air, shutting the door behind me. I'm on my way now. Switzerland is my destination and I'll finally get to see my brother for the first time it what seems like forever.
I arrive at the airport, my bags in hand. I go through the standard procedures and I'm finally able to sit down and wait for my plane. Waiting is taking forever, so I go to the Tim Horton's inside the airport and grab an Iced Cap. Sipping on it I'm filled with a warm pleasure – I don't care if it's cold out in general and it's an iced coffee drink, I'm warm. It's good coffee after all, at Christmas time.
"Passengers for the flight to Switzerland may now board their plane," I hear a female voice say over an intercom. I smile, get up and take my carry-on with me – a nice designer bag, big enough to fit my wallet, cell phone, iPod and book.
The plane ride is taking forever. I knew it would, a trip from Toronto to Switzerland is bound to be long. It just seems longer than I ever could have imagined. I read my book, play games on my cell phone, watch the movie playing, and listen to my iPod. I just hope for the time to pass by. I eventually fall into a light sleep, my head crooked against the back of the seat.
Finally we're here, and I'm awoken by the sound of the pilot's voice telling us to make sure we're ready for landing. I make sure I am, following his instructions so I can just get off already.
Moments later I'm out of the airport, my luggage in hand and the cool air biting me. My ears feel frozen and I'm thanking God for my heavy winter jacket and my favorite leather gloves – faux leather, actually. When I bought them, I couldn't help but think of how much Emma Nelson would freak if I had bought the real ones – not that she would find out. All of her protests still linger in my mind. She was a fighter, and she always stood up for what she believed in. I respected that – and still do.
"Paige!" I hear the familiar voice I had been searching for call through the cold air. I turn and see him coming at me. His familiar blond curls, his tall, toned body. My brother Dylan, I finally get to see him in person.
"Dylan, hon!" I call back. I can see my breath lingering in the air. I run into the moisture on my way to him, giving him the biggest hug I've ever given to anyone. It's more than wonderful to see him again.
He takes me to his place and we talk on the ride there. The basic stuff, though. "How has life been?" and other basic questions in the same category. I wonder if he'll ask about Marco. I almost hope that he will.
We finally arrive and I notice it's a house much like the one back in Toronto. The one he and Marco picked out for a bunch of us to live in. The same concept goes for this one. Except it's a bunch of attractive hockey players living together… Dylan must get a lot of wet dreams.
We go in, but the house is empty. As if he knew I was curious about this he said, "They're all out at a party."
I nod and am thankful for this. He leads me upstairs to the guest bedroom. It actually was one that used to be occupied by a teammate before he got kicked off the team for using steroids. It sounds like drama has been following Dylan even if he's thousands of miles away from Degrassi.
We sit down on the bed and he tells me that the bathroom is right next door and that most of the guys use the bigger one down the hall so I don't need to worry too much about it. I smile and laugh, thanking him.
"I'm glad you came. We used to have so much fun during Christmas. Do you remember when you got that karaoke machine?" He asks.
I nod and smile again, "Yeah, I do." A few giggles escaped my lips as we began to remember it.
"Paige honey, for the camera!" Mr. Michalchuk called the attention
of his daughter who had just had her Christmas wish granted. A new
karaoke machine, pink, that came with a Spice Girls karaoke CD.
Eight-year-old Paige was holding the microphone in her hands as she
stood in her pajamas. Everyone was looking at her, waiting for her to
start breaking into her own rendition of "Wannabe". Paige smiled at her father, ready to have this moment on tape for the
rest of their lives. So she began, and one wouldn't expect an
eight-year-old to know song lyrics as well as she did. She didn't even
stumble upon the verse lyrics. "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends!" The music
played in the background and she kept going on with each lyric like
singing this song was the most natural thing in the world. Finally, she
was done, and she got the expected support of her family, even Dylan
who was on the floor examining his new hockey stick. That was his
Christmas wish that year. "So Dylan, what did you think of your sister's singing?" asked Mrs. Michalchuk. "She was good," pre-pubescent Dylan answered with a smile. "I'm going to bring this upstairs," Paige announced. She had already
planned where she was going to put it in her room. She knew they'd be
heading to her aunt's house soon and she wanted to make sure it was OK
before they got ready and left. "Dylan, why don't you help her? It looks heavy," said Mr. Michalchuk.
Dylan sighed, stood up and went over to grab the karaoke machine from
his sister. "I'll show you where to put it," said Paige as she handed the machine
over. She let go too soon, however. Dylan hadn't adjusted his grip on
it and the heavy thing fell smack on his foot. "Dylan!" his parents gasped in unison. They both rushed over to him.
Paige moved out of the way, her face frozen with fear. What had she
done? She walked backwards, farther away from the scene. It could be
broken or something, it would be all her fault too…. She kept inching
back, and then finally turned around so she could navigate herself out
of the room. She didn't want to see what had happened, not if it was
her fault. Her first step after she turned around was into Dylan's hockey stick
which he had left on the ground and she tripped over it, falling flat
on her face hard. Crrrrack. Blood poured down onto the hardwood floors.
Mrs. Michalchuk rushed over to this scene. It looked like this
Christmas would be spent in the emergency room.
"Wasn't exactly the most fun Christmas," I say with a laugh. "But you were right when you said that we'd end up laughing about this one day when we were in the emergency room."
"Of course I was," he says with a smile. "I also told you to look at the bright side: neither of the toys were broken."
"But you couldn't even use yours with a broken foot."
"And you were too self-conscious of how you sounded with a broken nose when you sang. It was months before we heard you screaming Spice Girls songs at the top of your lungs again."
I throw him a look. Screaming? I remember singing well, actually.
"Beautifully screaming," he corrects himself quickly.
"We'll make some new memories this year," I begin. "Without the parents, too."
"But they always made things so funny!" He jokes.
"They thought so at least," I sigh. "Remember when they were trying to bring the Christmas spirit back into the family?"
"Caroling in the Canadian winter around Christmas time after getting a foot of snow isn't fun," Dylan comments. I nod in agreement.
"Come on, kids! We have the Kerwins next! They'll need extra holiday
cheer since Robert left them..." Mrs. Michalchuk's voice became hushed
as she uttered those last few words. She knew why he left, but Ashley,
Paige, and Dylan, none of them knew. Paige was behind purposely. She didn't want to do this. She would much
rather go home and watch Frosty the Snowman with a nice cup of hot
chocolate. She knew Dylan didn't like the idea either. It was better
when they went to the older people's houses because So Paige ran over to Dylan and grabbed him by the arm. "I have a plan," she whispered to him, and he nodded with excitement. "We should embarrass them," Dylan said. "But how could we do that without embarrassing ourselves?" "I don't know," Paige replied. "But I think that we should just ditch
them. Pretend we're going up to Ash's house with them but then run back
home." "That might actually embarrass them, too," said Dylan with a laugh. "Hon! Shhhh!" she hissed as they went back to walking behind their parents who were now approaching the Kerwins' steps. "Now," she whispered and they both ran, their parents completely
unaware of their absence. They could run fast, those Michalchuk kids.
They were home free, and laughed when they were far enough away. How
long would it take their parents to realize their absence from the
'family' activity.
"If you really think about it, we never had any uneventful Christmases," I say with a smile.
"Definitely true. There really aren't any dull moments with the Michalchuks," Dylan agrees. "But I have memory to show you know."
"Oh really?"
"Really."
He takes my hand, lifts me off the bed and brings me into his room. Under his TV is a bunch of VHS movies – I wonder why he's in the Stone Age. Then I remember that he wants to show me a memory and figure it's one of those home movies Dad insisted on making every year.
He takes one of them, pops it into the VCR in his TV and a picture pops onto the screen. A familiar one. One that still lingers in my memory, as clearly as the video depicted it – maybe even more so.
"I have something to say," Dylan said, wondering why he chose
Christmas to bring up the news. Then it came to him – it was in front
of his entire family. Better they all heard it from him than from a
call with his mother. He saw his dad in the corner who was taping as he
and all his cousins and Paige were opening presents. Immediately after
the last present was open he decided to stand up, forgetting about his
dad with the camera. It didn't matter that it would be on tape – no one
would ever forget this announcement. Mr. Michalchuk wanted to record
whatever it was anyway. It may be important one day. He didn't even
know how important… "Whether you guys like it or not – I'm gay." The words came easier than
he ever could have expected. It felt good to hear himself say. It was
good to finally get it off his chest after months of living with it
bottled inside, trying to escape like carbon dioxide in a pop can. As expected, several jaw dropped, and for those still eating at the
table, silverware fell and made a huge clanking noise against the
ceramic plates. He sighed, pushing his curly hair out of his face. He
didn't expect anyone to see it coming. He wasn't the gay stereotype
after all – playing hockey, watching sports, always athletic and
wearing "guy" clothes. "How would you even know? You're only thirteen!" his mother objected. "Son…" his dad said crushed. Everyone else just seemed to stare at him. Except the younger children
– they had no idea how it meant, nor did they care. They had new toys
to play with, and that's all they wanted to do. Paige didn't seem to worried about it. She was getting into the "I love
boys" stage of her life now and she'd have someone to relate to. Dylan
knew that she would love him no matter what happened anyway, so her
reaction hadn't bothered him when he planned it out in his head. His parents however… "Son, we need to talk," Mr. Michalchuk said, and the video ended.
I stare at him, wondering why he brought it up. "The most vivid Christmas memory I have. I didn't realize how controversial it was at the time. I just remember feeling kind of happy. It was… intruiging," I say softly and honestly.
"I knew you'd be OK with it, just, mom and dad…"
"Yeah, well they got over it and they became quite proud. They say how brave you are and how you're a great son as it is, so why should they care? Hon, we love you," I tell him with a smile.
"I know. I just kind of wanted to relive it. It was a nice memory, actually… I thought it would kind of end our trip down Christmas Memory Lane on a good note we can relate to now more than the karaoke incident or the embarrassing parents. They're not so embarrassing anymore…"
"That's because we never see him," I say with a laugh.
"You wanna grab something to eat?" he asks me.
"Yeah. What do they eat in Switzerland, anyway?"
"You'll see. I'll take you to my favorite place."
And we leave. And I know this will be another Christmas to remember. Even more than Dylan's coming out. We'll make it great. We're Michalchuks after all.