Disclaimer: Unfortunately for you and me, Star Trek Voyager belongs to Paramount Pictures, but we're free to add our own ideas, right?
Author's Note: This story is told in Chakotay's Point of View.
It's the first time I've written something like this, so be
kind:)
Dance away the Moon
By Kathryn Murphy
July 1998
I was looking for her.
I had been for almost an hour now. Walking through the group of people, my eyes were looking, searching for her; but never finding their destination.
I walked slowly to a corner and sat down on the bench, discouraged.
B'elanna came up to me then, handing me a glass.
"What's wrong?" she asked, as I took the glass from her hand.
She knows me well, and I don't even attempt to hide my feelings from her.
That would only make her angry.
"I can't find her." I replied. "I've looked everywhere, but there are so many people..." I trailed off, my eyes traveling past her, to the crowd in the Gardens.
Almost the entire crew had been beamed down to the planet for the festivities, leaving only a skeleton crew commanding Voyager.
They were calling it "The Festival of Lights", and rightfully so; the brightly lit torches lining the Gardens were casting dancing shadows along the way. They were happy; all of them. Content to spend the evening with their friends and family. Enjoying themselves, but I was missing something, someone; my other half.
B'elanna spoke, startling me. I had forgotten that she was still there, standing before me.
"I'll let you know if I see her." she said quietly, placing her hand on my shoulder, before moving of to join Tom and the others. A gesture of friendship. She knew I wouldn't be complete tonight unless I found her.
B'elanna knows me very well.
I decide to go for a walk, away from the center of activity. The mood I was in was only serving to make them uneasy. They didn't deserve it. Tonight was theirs.
I walked away slowly from the Gardens, running my hands along the flowers as I passed, disturbing their slumber. I stopped suddenly, and my gaze traveled upward, to the sky.
Oh the moon was beautiful tonight. *But maybe it was like this every night* I thought.
Tonight was our first and last night here. We would be leaving tomorrow. For a moment, I feel something grip at my heart.
Longing maybe.
But only for a moment, before I push it back, tucking it safely behind my reasoning. Tomorrow we would be continuing on our journey; this was just another stop along the way.
My gaze returns to the brightness of the moon, and I breathe in deeply.
It's comforting somehow, the light above me. My eyes follow the path it takes, shining over the Gardens.
I start to turn back, but my eye catches a shadow over by the tree. I stop, frozen in place.
It's her! I've found her! A smile spreads across my face, and my mood changes immediately. I looked at her for a moment before making my way over. She looks like an angel, sitting there, bathed in the light of the moon above us, but as I move closer, I see that my angel is crying. Her knees hugged to her chest, head rested on her arms.
It breaks my heart.
"Kathryn" I whisper, so soft I don't even know if she's heard me.
She stills, and for a moment I curse myself for intruding, but then she slowly lifts her head from her arms, and turns toward me. I know she has said something, but her words are swallowed up by the gentle breeze around us. I move closer now, kneeling when I reach her. I lift her chin up with my hand so I can look into er eyes; her tears sparkling in the moonlight.
"Kathryn, what's wrong?" I ask quietly, and for a moment, I fear that she is going to say that everything is alright, but the emotions that I see playing across her face are so powerful.
At this moment, she is open to me.
"I'm afraid," she responds. I can hear her this time. I gently move my hand to caress her face, wiping her tears away with my thumb.
"What are you afraid of Kathryn?" I ask, looking into her eyes. I find myself lost in the pools of deep blue before me, but I pull myself back. She needs me.
"I'm so afraid Chakotay. I'm afraid of going forward, and I'm afraid of staying where I am. I don't want to do it anymore." she whispers. Her words are so soft, that I have to strain to hear them. She looks at me now.
"They're so happy Chakotay." she motions to our crew, still in the Gardens. "They're so happy. Together. They still want to get home, but it doesn't occupy their thoughts all the time. They are living now, not for what may or may not happen." she pauses, and then turns back to me.
"I want to be happy." she whispers.
For a moment all I can do is stare. Did she really say that? I look deeply into her eyes, her soul, and I know the answer to my question. I gently pulled her to her feet, and cupped her face in my hands.
"Let me make you happy Kathryn."
At that moment, she smiles, and I know the heavens have sent me angel to love. I pull her close to me, as my arms go around her waist, and hers taking their place around my neck.
I run one of my hands through her long hair, and she presses her face into my chest, as I begin to move.
Swaying back and forth, holding onto each other; never wanting
to let go. Dancing to the music in the breeze.
Dance to the beautiful music,
created by the song in your heart.
Move and sway to the beat of the soul,
and Dance away the Moon.
Fine
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