Hidden Pains
By: Heero_YuyZ
Rated: PG-13
On the outside I'm happy
I'm gleeful and cheer
I act like a ditz to make people laugh
I need laughter
It's the only thing that can keep me alive
On the inside I'm angry
Sad, and alone
Scared, and frightened
I cry myself to sleep at night
I can't go on like this
Hiding my pain
That I must endure
No one know what it's like
To have you torn from your mothers arms
To grow up on the streets
To do my best to stay alive
In a dank and dark world
No one knows
I find my only kin
And get a job from him
And he expects me to hide the pain
That I've endured for all these years
I knew no love
I knew no friendship
Kindness, happiness
All words foreign to me
And now I just hide it
Behind this mask of glee
No one knows what it's like
To have to sell your body
Just to keep alive
To have to do that
Was a hell long gone
But not forgotten
Scars of pain still haunt me
Of the life I had before
Before someone cared
Before I knew love
Before I knew friendship
Kiyone still doesn't understand
If I was my true self
I'd scare her
My dark attitude
Is what I cry out at midnight
So I grab the knife
Slice it on my arms
It's the only way to release the pain
The pain subsides
But not forever
So I cut again
Again and again
I must get rid of the pain
The pain I feel inside
So I cut again…