Disclaimer: I don't own Tokyo Mew Mew.
Note: A new oneshot from yours truely. My first Tokyo Mew Mew fanfiction that hasn't been Kish centric. I hope it goes well.
Settling the Score
Ichigo Momomiya ascended the steps leading to the second floor of the popular Café Mew Mew where, she knew, was home for a certain Ryou Shirogane – a Ryou Shirogane whom she needed to pick a bone with, of course.
She shook an inward fist at the mental image that arose in her mind, right then; it was of her Boss with the huge, characteristic smirk across his features, making out to be the superior in the situation. Ichigo couldn't stand him in his phases. Sometimes he could be so… mean. Especially to her. She could have sworn he reserved all of his irritation, rage and anger and all unpleasant-feeling for when she was around. It was a conspiracy of hers that, if provided with the correct evidence, could have been proven correct.
But now wasn't the time to prove theories. It was time for her to set the score straight…
Her feet fell against every step, her hands securing the dark, wooden railing and her eyes glazed over at what, exactly, she was going to say. She couldn't very well just blurt out anything because knowing her luck, it would be either totally rude or wouldn't make sense at all. Usually the latter, when she was angry.
She neared towards the end of the staircase and the beginning of the long, carpeted corridor which led to, what she assumed to be the bedrooms in the place. She found the door of which she knew belonged to her boss and rapped on its surface quite thoroughly.
'Shirogane!' She called, frowning. He was really trying her patience in being not responsive. Usually he would tell her to come in or she would open the door and, of course, catch him without a shirt on. Then he would rub it into her face.
Not this time.
Ichigo knocked yet again, 'Shirogane! Shi-ro-gane! I need to talk to you. Open the damn door!' There was yet again no reply. The cat-girl's eyebrows wrinkled in concern. Something was wrong, she thought, not even Shirogane would take a joke this far.
A horrible thought crossed her mind. What if…? What if he's hurt? She felt her heart leap in her chest and dread mingled with apprehension cross over her usually cheerful or, in the previous case, annoyed features.
If something really was a matter, Ichigo would never forgive herself for not opening the door at that very moment but, if something wasn't a matter, she would probably get teased and embarrassed and lectured by Shirogane, who would turn out to be completely fine.
The confused, Iriomote Wildcat judged her options. She could flee then and there and no harm done, or she could take the plunge and manage to either embarrass herself yet again or perhaps save Shirogane's life or get a raise or talk to him about a certain something that had been weighing on her mind, the same thing she had felt so irritated at beforehand…
In the end, the need to check her Boss' safety seemed more important to her than being taunted for her decision so, without another moments hesitation, she swung the door open to reveal –
– The perfectly clean, quite empty room of Ryou Shirogane. Ichigo poked around for a brief second, checking every nook and cranny that he could be hiding in or under as means of an escape from her. She sighed, her search coming up with no leads.
That is, until her gaze shifted to the adjoining bathroom, attached to Shirogane's room from the Eastern side. She blinked once, then twice just to make sure that it was really there then, with a sudden, cunning smile that crossed over her face, Ichigo walked across the room and opened the bathroom door.
It was unlocked. Ichigo didn't stop to think about her decision or the consequences of which that decision could have bought upon her and her reputation. Nor what, pray tell, she might have seen in that bathroom.
For all she knew, Shirogane could have been on the toilet, or something. But no. Miss Momomiya didn't even think about her choice, she just opened the door with no problem at all and, after it hit her a single moment later, was cussing herself for not thinking sooner.
Of course, Shirogane wasn't on the toilet. Ichigo breathed a sigh of relief. She was one hundred percent glad that she had not caught him in the middle of such a deed.
Well, ninety nine point nine percent. Albeit she would never let anyone – including Shirogane himself, in fact, especially – indulge in this fact. Ever.
No, instead of catching her Boss hygienically wise, Ichigo was graced with another scenario.
Ryou Shirogane, the man that had always seemed to directly weed her out for everything and insult and over-work her and show a demonic interest in her more than any other waitress or Mew at the face, was laying face-up on the smooth, cool blue tiles of his bathroom floor. In one hand, he held a bar of soap, in the other, he held an iPod Nano.
The mechanical device – the iPod, not the soap – was currently switched into the "on" position. Under different circumstances, of which Ichigo might even take an interest into what the small, black mechanism was playing, she would have noticed that the song was, in fact, Du Hast by Ramstein. A song which had taken America once by storm, although originally sung in German.
This same song also happened to be completely and utterly ear-shattering, as well.
So much, that Ichigo, still staring in shock, could hear it from where she was standing, over three meters away. Upon regaining herself over the initial shock of it all, the Strawberry walked over to her prey, noting that he also happened to be fast asleep.
She took a single, concerned moment to wonder why in the name of whoever was holy, Shirogane was laying in the middle of his bathroom floor, sprawled out like a starfish and listening to Rock Music so loud that he could probably be oblivious to a tornado, even if it crept up on him with the only active sense being its sound.
He looked like he could sleep through a tornado, too.
Ichigo's brow furrowed. Stupid idiot Shirogane, she thought. What if it wasn't me who had sneaked up on you, huh? What if it was a thief or a murderer or something? You would be defenceless or get hurt for your ignorance!
She blinked, a moment later, when she replayed everything she had just mentally sent to him.
'What the–?' She spluttered, so surprised by what she had just thought and how much feeling had been laced through her words and expressions, that she was momentarily stunned into complete silence and immobilisation. Why? Why do I even care about Shirogane? No. I don't, do I? I just think he's so stupid! Yeah, that's it. He's stupid. He's stupid enough to fall asleep in the middle of such a loud song. It would be his stupid fault that he would get hurt, anyway, not mine. So why, pray tell, do I care?
Ichigo shook off the thoughts, then progressed to the next stage of thinking.
Now, how was she going to wake him up? This was tricky. If she just turned off the music and woke him up, he would probably get angry. If she shook him even with the music he would probably break his eardrums and then get angry.
And if she didn't wake him at all?
He would wake up, eventually, or by someone else and then realise that she had, in fact, entered his room and then go downstairs and demand to know why she had entered his room and then not awoken him and would get all angry anyway.
And not only would she miss out on her chance to complain, but it would take all the fun out of the situation.
Face it, Ichigo, the cat-girl told herself, usually you're a big softie, but when it comes to exacting revenge on Shirogane, you can't pass it up, can you? She knew the answer already. No, she couldn't.
A devious plan formulated in her mind, right then. She felt a large, promising grin light up on her pretty, young features.
It's perfect.
Meanwhile, Akasaka Keiichiro happened to notice the absence of one less waitress in the Café diner. Ichigo, he thought tenderly, where could you possibly be now He asked Lettuce, who was taking a short break after having to clean up her third broken plate that day, to check in the female lavatory and changing rooms, but her search came up with nothing.
Keiichiro also pursued all other parts of the Café, except for the basement and the second floor. After I finish this serving, he reminded himself, I will go look for her.
After three servings of Carmel Cheesecake and a Strawberry Parfait later, Keiichiro managed to remember the lack of service and the problem he faced with one less waitress – one of which, he had to admit, did most of the work herself – and the stunning Ichigo Momomiya, at that, and descended the cold, dark steps of the basement.
A moment later, he returned, the search pointless. A theory crossed over his mind, however, at the young girl's whereabouts.
He checked the second floor, in his quarters, than the spare room and finally he found himself staring at the dark, oak door leading to Ryou's personal bedroom. He heard no raised voices or any sign of life in the immediate vicinity, however, and he began to have his doubts.
But, he thought, it wouldn't hurt to take a quick look.
His hand felt warm against the cool, metal surface of the doorknob. Slowly, he twisted it open. The door creaked under the pressure he exerted into the task. Soon, however, it gave into his push and swung upon. He walked through the threshold and into the room effortlessly. The door swung closed behind him.
His dark, brown eyes scanned the surfaces of Ryou's room. He could feel a small, upward movement in his lips when his eyes glanced at the photo frame that Ryou had kept there. Standing together, beams on their faces were Ryou's parents, with their beloved son in the middle of them and a much younger, Keiichiro Akasaka standing next to the beautiful Mrs Shirogane.
Disregarding the image with another, sad smile, his attention was drawn elsewhere – Ryou's laptop. He removed the screensaver, of which displayed lyrics to some Americanised band that Ryou seemed to listen to, and opened the most recent files. He scanned them, eyes adjusting to the deep, white glow of the screen.
Nothing out of the ordinary.
Except…
Keiichiro opened a stand-alone file, a Microsoft Word Document entitled as "Ichigo.doc." His intentions were to briefly skim the contents and then regain his search to find Ryou and, hopefully, their beloved leader Momomiya Ichigo along with him.
But his search came up with much more than he bargained for. Of course, he didn't mean to pry, but to ensure Ryou's safety, he had to observe any changes in the opened files on the machine.
Or maybe it was just curiosity, in the end, or maybe fate. The young, brunette-haired pastry chef read "Ichigo.doc" and soon found himself emerged in something far more private than he had imagined.
With a slight, pink blush across his cheeks and an even lighter smile on his face, Keiichiro closed the document and left the computer, letting the screensaver swallow up the screen again, after exactly a minute.
He was about to leave when his eyes came across the door to Ryou's personal bathroom. He walked towards it, then heard a large THUMP, which caught him off-guard. He placed his hand on the doorknob but had the decency to call out first.
'Ryou? Ryou, its Keiichiro. Is everything ok? Have you seen Ichigo?' His questions ceased when suddenly, he heard the shower dial's spin from "off" to "on." A small smile crossed his face. Ryou was accustom to showering at almost any time any day, due to the cat genes which still controlled part of his lifestyle and free will. They had never fully manifested, however, which was why he found himself unable to transform or let the genes mutate into power as it did for the girls.
'Very well,' he said, then left, mind focusing on what, exactly, he had just read off of the private files on his companions computer.
And, on top of the knowledge and confusion was the underlying guilt that he had just stumbled onto something far beyond him.
From inside Shirogane's bathroom, Ichigo sighed in relief. Thank god she had managed to think up a plan long enough to get Keiichiro to leave the room, otherwise her plan would have been worthless.
She wasn't yet sure of the variables, but she was sure that it would be as embarrassing and cunning as Ryou's plots against her in the past. But she wasn't all that certain she should be fooling with him in such a state…
'Nya, I'm too soft for my own good.' She grinned and then continued to work.
Ichigo stopped for a minute. She stopped everything she was doing and simply looked at the current bane of her existence – the man that seemed to be working her harder than the aliens did with their releasing of the Chimera Anima and the like. He over-worked her, under-paid her and led her on to believe things that were completely and utterly untrue…
And then there was his attitude! Oh the nerve, Ichigo found herself thinking, her wonderings taking on a tone of annoyance. He always found something to bully her with or use as a comeback in one of their countless arguments or, in fact, start the argument himself.
He was so mean to her all of the time, so menacing. But now, he looked as if he were a different person entirely.
His face was no longer contorted or scarred by his usual deadpan expression or the trademark frown he wore. He had managed to portray a serene, lazy smile across his face, which brightened his still-sleeping facial features.
Ichigo was sure that he only ever wore such a smile for this time – unconsciousness. The conscious Ryou Shirogane would never smile, she knew, to her especially. He hated her.
Well, that was the conclusion she had drawn. It was the only other way she could explain his attitude towards her and yet his civility towards the other girls. He was even slightly more lenient on Mint, who really just sat back and drank tea for the entire duration of her work, then usually had to leave early for a ballet recital.
But whatever, she found herself thinking. She placed a finger onto his cream completion and traced the features of his face. Strong nose… thin, pink lips… messy, golden hair… unwrinkled eyelids… long, dark eyelashes…
In her minds eye, she saw his eyelids flutter open and the gorgeous, ice cold irises of his eyes blink back at her. They would hold such pent-up emotion and mystery that she could barely comprehend, as he was such an enigma himself…
Again, Ichigo blinked, falling out of her thoughts.
No… What's going on? Why am I thinking such things about… about Shirogane? I'm only doing this to get back at him! I don't feel anything for him but distaste, that's all! There is no way I even remotely like him… I am totally faithful to my Aoyama-kun…
Her words seemed to hit deaf ears.
It's only because he looks so different when he's sleeping, she continued, disregarding the doubt that began to creep up on her, in fact, he might even look cute…
Yeah. Unlike his attitude.
Ichigo fumed. Shut. Up. She ordered herself, pushing back the thought and confusion that rioted over her world whenever she stared down at the handsome, pristine face of her victim.
She remembered how many times he had victimised her beforehand, in front of so many people, including her friends.
Then her plan came rushing back to her and all thoughts of ever thinking Ryou Shirogane as cute was thrown out of her thoughts with another, single yet powerful thought.
Soon, she found all the pieces falling into place and, without anymore set backs, roused the sleeping blonde she cradled in her arms.
Ryou's eyes opened slowly and carefully as he felt consciousness return to him once more. His dream, a slow, agonising dream involving the fire that had taken the lives of his parents, was fresh in his mind.
His eyes opened fully. He looked up and they widened somewhat, his blue eyes meeting a mirror image of his own.
The woman cradling his head in her arms was the splitting image of his Mother.
But… it couldn't be true. It can't be true, he thought.
His Mother was dead.
Yet she was right here, right here looking down on him. Her face was pristine, clean with no traces of hurt from whatever the tragedy must have done to her. She looked as if none of it had ever happened.
In that moment, he felt close to tears, although he would never confide in anyone of this fact. 'Momma?'
The single word broke the spell. No longer was he in his Mother's arms. Her features changed, transforming into a young, pretty face of one he knew well. She had dark, hazel eyes and a pale face surrounded by a messy mane of auburn hair. Her lips were a dull pink and her hands were as soft as…
…As soft as his Mother's.
He felt the shock become displayed on his face as he stared. What… What was going on here? 'I-Ichigo?' He stuttered in disbelief.
'Ryou.' What was this? Ryou? She had never, ever called him by his first name before. It rolled off her lips like a melody. He found himself falling faster and harder for her than he had ever before.
Was this some sort of dream? It seemed real enough. Ryou was smart enough to have his doubts, however, and he questioned, 'What's going on here?' He said, apprehension arising to his voice.
He wanted to squash the doubt that he could feel arise on his face. He wanted to kill the feeling of being played and just dwell in the blissful moment. She had no idea… Ichigo…
'Ryou. I have something to tell you.'
His heart caught in his throat. Something was definitely going on here. For one, they weren't arguing. Two, he happened to notice their position. She was seated with her body against the wall and his head was cradled in her lap. The position was so confusing and yet so… right. It was peaceful. It was home.
But he let himself surrender to the good-feeling. 'A-And, what might that be?' He hoped she didn't catch on to his nervousness.
Was she? No. It was impossible. There was no way that she would ever… No. Never…
The reality of the situation came crashing down on him, hard. Their position, their lack of arguments, her expression and her usage of his first name. It must be a dream, this must be a dream, he thought, so why did it seem so real?
Could she… can she…?
She paused, for effect, it seemed, more than anything else. 'I'm engaged.'
He felt his entire being freeze up. Disappointment flooded through him. He laughed it off, inwardly of course. Oh, of course not. She would never… How could I ever think that she would like someone like me?
Then the force of her words came crashing down, like water smashing through a break in the surface of a dam.
He exploded, 'Whaaat!?'
Ichigo blinked, innocently. 'I just told you. I'm engaged to be married.' She said it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
Ryou felt himself slowly loosing control, 'Y-You? Engaged? To who?'
She smiled, 'Silly. Kish, of course.'
That's it. He lost it. 'KISH?! Bloody hell, Ichigo. Why are you ENGAGED… a-and to KISH?!'
She blinked, taken aback, 'I… I… Oh dear.' She paused, as if she felt a sudden pulsating fury through her veins, 'Why are you so against my being happy anyways? First Masaya and now when I find love with Kish?'
Ryou stared at her, eyes wide, 'I can't believe this.' He said, then put his head in his hands.
Ichigo just looked at him, her snicker, hidden behind her words, suddenly faltering. She had expected outrage, of course, but why was he taking it so far? Maybe… maybe it was a bad idea…
'Ryou.' It felt so weird saying his first name, 'Are you ok?'
He looked up at her. Her eyes widened out of shock. His piercing blue gaze was so strong, she could feel herself and all of her lies starting to fade. He just stared at her and she then noticed the small pinpricks of warmth in the corners of his eyes.
No… She thought, disbelieving. He wasn't going to…
He broke away from her, right then, and stood. Then, swiftly began to pace the length of the bathroom, 'Of course I'm not okay! Ichigo. You're barely fourteen, and your thinking about marriage already? And with Kish? Did you suddenly forget that he's our enemy?'
He turned around and held his hands up in a gesture, exaggerating his thought and putting forth his argument.
Ichigo blinked again. Ok. She had expected the lecture. But definitely not what happened next.
'Why?' He turned on her again, eyes pleading. 'Why did you choose him?' Wow. Ichigo thought. This was unexpected. The cat-girl was definitely having her doubts, now. Even she knew her limits, and in this one, the line was definitely drawn.
What was wrong with him? Why was he taking it so hard? He hated her. Maybe it was just the thought of her being happy that sickened him? Or maybe not…
She couldn't bring herself to reply to his question.
He continued, and it was his next question that poured the concrete over the suspicious that had aroused deep within the pits of her stomach, a theory that curled around her heartstrings, pulling them into a tight bind.
'Why can't you be with me?'
Ichigo froze. Had she just heard right? 'I-I…' The concrete froze the bind in place. She could feel a sudden ache in her heart, more than physically deep. This was turning out to be one big mistake. One, she was sure, she would regret far more than ever walking in on Ryou Shirogane shirtless.
Before she could muster up a reply or a confession, which was what she really should have said, the door to the bathroom burst open. Mint examined them, breathless. 'I- Akasaka-san came to tell you that there's been a Chimera attack at the Tokyo Tower. We're needed there, ASAP. And –' She suddenly noticed Ichigo's presence.
'Ichigo, why are you here? Is this where you were all along?' A sudden annoyance bubbled in Mint's voice. 'Oh, whatever. Hurry. We don't have much time before the Café is closed.'
Ryou walked out of the room first, and then Ichigo. A sudden, deep feeling of dread came across her when he wouldn't meet her eyes.
What have I done? She thought uneasily.
In less than five minutes, Tokyo Mew Mew found themselves in the midst of Town Square, bordering the Tokyo Tower, where a vicious Chimera Anima reined the skies. Pedestrians and innocents caught in the crossfire dove for cover, with children screaming and mothers weeping under the weight of its fierce nature. Ichigo stared at it, feeling more distraught by previous events than by the sights she now witnessed…
'Care to tell me what was happening back there?' Mint asked, cocking an eyebrow with a smirk across her face. Ichigo shook her head.
She paused before she spoke in reply, 'It was nothing.' She turned around to where Ryou was standing, face taught and lost in thought. Suddenly, their gazes met. He broke off the eye-contact barely a second after.
But not too early as for Ichigo not to capture a glance at the pain seen in the two, deep blue orbs of emotion. She felt her heart sink and the binds restrict it tighter, suffocating her like a noose around her neck.
Why was this affecting her so much? She couldn't muster up an answer, however, because a moment later, their alien foes appeared from above them. Pai, Tart, Kish…
Kish… Ichigo cursed. She remembered her lie. Shit.
This is not good.
'Ah, Tokyo Mew Mew!' Tart cooed, eyes hardened and voice, mocking. Despite their terrifying demeanour, Pudding's eyes lit up all of a sudden. Ichigo noticed and her heart fell even more.
'Koneko-chan!' Kish said, with a wink in her direction. Before she could even think on how it would effect her situation and her hairline thin relationship with Ryou, Ichigo grimaced.
She hissed, 'Back off, geek.'
This is SO not good. She decided, when she turned around and saw Ryou's eyes fixated on Kish. Then, he averted his gaze to her face. For a brief, terrifying second, she saw the pain and then the hurt and the betrayal…
'Ichigo!' A voice called. Ichigo turned to see Mew Zakuro then she trained her stare onto the Chimera Anima fast enough to dodge an otherwise lethal blow to the head that it was reining down upon them.
She did a somersault in the air, feeling the rush of power that she usually witnessed in being in her Mew form. Zakuro aimed her whip and managed to crack it directly in the eye. Mint trained her arrow onto the same spot and fired. The Chimera Anima reared back, a loud, echoing noise piercing through the sky and breaking the sound barrier without motion.
That, she realised, was its scream. The Mew's and the surrounding pedestrians instinctively put their hands to their ears. Ichigo blinked. Even with her sensitive hearing, the scream of the Chimera hurt less than the feeling she experienced when she saw Ryou's look of betrayal in her direction when he realised that it was all a scam. That she had set him up. That she had the nerve to…
'Ichigo, DUCK!' Ichigo followed blindly. Mint glared and she knew that, on top of all, she would have to face another lecture of negligence from her blue-haired best friend. Surprisingly, Ichigo found that she didn't care.
It didn't compare to the amount of guilt her heart was constricted in. It didn't compare nor did it matter.
Ichigo knew that nothing would get done with her kicking herself through the entire battle so she decided to end it right then and there. She called upon her weapon, the Strawberry Bell, as her other four companions readied their own weapons to strike the decoy blows.
Four. Zakuro's whip cracked across the underbelly of the Chimera. It reared slightly, loosing momentary composure.
Which is when they had to strike next…
Three. Lettuce carefully aimed her Castanets. They provided enough force to hold the uncomfortable position.
Two. Mint shot her arrow. It empowered the water spurred from Lettuce's attack, also applying pressure.
One. Pudding used her Pudding-Ring to fire a rapid shot and create the usual yellow jelly-like substance that surrounded the creature.
Then, Ichigo readied herself. It was now or never.
'Ribbon Strawberry Surprise!' The shot hit home.
The Chimera Anima process was undone. It compressed the mutated animal back into its two, original states and live organisms, the animal and the alien seed. Masha immediately jumped to the rescue, recovering the alien seed and, as per usual, swallowing it and annihilating its regenerative properties.
The animal scurried away before Ichigo could see what it was. But she didn't care, frankly. Nor did she care at the fact that, the moment the Chimera was defeated, the three aliens disappeared. The underlying guilt was all that she could think of or care about. She knew that, the moment they set foot in the Café, that she had to tell him. She had to set it all right again.
Somehow.
This soon seemed, throughout the entire duration of their arrival back at Café Mew Mew, to be an impossible feat. The moment that they came back, Ryou disappeared down in the basement, with Akasaka-san taking care of the five girls.
They were assigned their last jobs to do before they could go home early, as always whenever an alien attack had elapsed. Lettuce was to clean the floors, Zakuro and Pudding would do the dishes, Mint drifted off to have yet another tea break, which left Ichigo to clean the tables.
Groaning, the Strawberry-haired heroine – or the identity behind the heroine, Mew Ichigo – took a sponge and began to scrub. Seconds turned into minutes, minutes turned into hours and soon, Ichigo couldn't take it anymore.
Her thoughts had been on overdrive the moment they had returned. She was thinking of any way possible that she could salvage the bond between Ryou and herself. But no matter how hard she thought, she knew that she had crossed the line and there were probably no second chances.
Why? Why did she feel so depressed all of a sudden? At the thought of loosing Ryou as what? A Boss? A friend?
Or was it more than that – was it deeper?
Why did the thought of loosing him chill her to the bone? Why did it make her so afraid? And of what?
She didn't know.
But she was going to find out.
A new defiance crossed over her, right then. A determination to set things right. To understand the things that she could not. To right the things that she had made wrong with her own thoughts, words and actions.
Ichigo set aside her sponge and the bucket full of dark, brown water, with tid-bits of whipped cream and Parfait mixed in with the grime. When she looked into it, she saw her reflection. Like the dirty water, it made her sick.
She passed Akasaka-san on her way down to the basement. She stopped, 'Uh…' She expected to be questioned on where she was going, especially after before.
But Akasaka said nothing to her dismissing of her job. He just smiled knowingly and nodded.
Ichigo felt apprehension arise, did Ryou tell Akasaka-san? She thought. No. She doubted that he would have. She gulped.
For a moment, she thought of turning back, of continuing her job then going to see him, but then she knew that she would never get it done. It was now or never. It has to be now.
And so, she descended the steps into the dark, dank basement below. Through her confusion, she didn't feel a pair of warm, brown eyes staring at her figure being swallowed by the darkness of her decent. Keiichiro Akasaka stood, staring at her departing frame.
'Ichigo,' he whispered, albeit he already knew she was out of reach.
'Please. Go easy on him, whatever your choice.'
Then he turned and, with a brief second glance at the basement stairs, entered the diner and began to scrub the tables that Ichigo had left behind.
Ryou. I hope you find happiness, whatever your decision.
When Ichigo walked through the doorsill of the corridor and into the basement, she first mistook the room to be empty. However, after the secondary sweep, her eyes picked up movement from the left corner. The soft, white glow of a computer screen had been lit.
And there, staring into its radiant depths, was Ryou.
Ichigo blinked, once again taken aback by her progression in her thoughts. Since when did I think of him as Ryou and not just Shirogane?
She didn't answer. She couldn't answer. It wasn't important, not yet anyway.
What was important is that she apologised. For everything.
'Keiichiro, please, leave me alone.' The voice of the one she vowed to find broke her thoughts. Suddenly, she was nervous. More nervous than she had ever been in her life.
Far more nervous than any speech she had ever told or whenever she had been with Masaya, and usually she was nervous all the time with him… But this. This was ten times worse. This feeling…
It was awkward. But it won't be that way, she thought. Not for long.
'A-Ano.' She began, and regretted it. She had nothing planned to say to him, no speech, no preparations. Nothing. When he turned, all thoughts were driven out of her head. All of them. Her mind was blank.
I have to say something… I have to think… Before it's too late.
Their eyes met. His were cold, ice blue. He averted his gaze and began to type rapidly into the computer, disregarding her presence altogether.
Ichigo's lip quivered. She felt like crying. No, not just crying, she felt like the ground should open up and she should fall into a pit of nothingness, just continue to fall forever, forever with her thoughts. It would be hell, but she deserved it.
She deserved it for what she did. It was worse than abuse. It was worse than screaming. It was worse than murder.
When she blinked, she tried to blink back tears but they just wouldn't allow her. Soon, they cascaded down her cheeks like two, colourless paths of water, embedding a stream into her immaculate features. She had never felt sadder than she did in that moment.
'I'm sorry.' She whispered, feeling all of it. The entire force of it. The disappointment. The hatred. The confusion. The depression. The anger. The… everything. She felt like cutting into herself, cutting in until she could feel. Feel something other than nothing. Because that was what was happening. She could feel her body going numb with lack of feeling, but only because she was feeling too much…
There was no response. Of course, she thought, I don't deserve it. She let the tears completely cloud her vision then.
She tried to explain, she had to make him understand… 'I thought it was a joke… I- I didn't know.' Her attempts weren't working. They were futile. They were meaningless. Just like she was.
And now she had totally messed it all up, just because of one, stupid mistake. 'I'm so, so sorry…' And then her voice cracked. Her words died in her throat, albeit she wasn't sure that she could muster up the power to say anything else, because the exhaustion that swept over her was overwhelming. It was too much…
Then he moved. It was a single, small movement, but she saw it. His head, previously upright, fell down a little further, as if he was resting his head in his hands. The typing was much slower now, she realised.
But it was that movement that made her see.
It made her realise and when she realised, the effect was astounding.
'Oh, oh my god…' She whispered, her voice almost completely inaudible. She wasn't sure she even heard it herself. But that wasn't important. It wasn't relevant. It was what she was feeling… what she had always felt.
A deep, anguished sob pierced the silence. It came from deep within and soon, she had let it all loose. She was crying and sobbing and sniffling because she knew now. She knew what it had taken so long for her to realise. All of it.
A memory, one of times long before she had ever became a Mew, one that pierced through her thoughts in the current situation. It was of her mother, hanging the clothes on the line. Ichigo was nine. She had a band-aid on her arm. She nursed it as if it was broken.
'You know, Ichigo,' Sakura had said lightly to her, in her beautiful sing-song voice, 'Usually when boys tease you it's because they like you.' At the time, Ichigo had been disgusted in this, but now she wasn't so sure.
In her mind, she remembered all of the times. The countless times that she had been bullied by her Boss, how he had put her down purposely, how he had teased her by pretending to be about to kiss her and make her cat ears and tail pop out. She had thought, before, that it was because he was being mean to her, that he hated her. But now, she saw it in a totally different light.
'Why can't you be with me?'
She understood now. She could comprehend. This was what she had to learn, had to know. She wasn't down here to make him comprehend, it was her who had to understand, and then work to make it right again.
But then she remembered. She remembered what she did and what understanding took out of both of them. The tears came back again in an onslaught unlike anything she had ever seen before.
It… It was too late. She was too late.
He hated her now, she was sure of it. He was going to tell her to leave here, and probably fire her and then tell her to hand over her Mew Pendant and tell the others and then none of them would want to see her again, ever. Not Mint, not Lettuce, not Pudding, not Zakuro, not Akasaka-san. None of them.
She didn't want to leave them. She didn't want to leave her friends, or the pastry chef, or…
Or Ryou.
She didn't want to leave but now it seemed she had no choice.
'I-I'll go, then. Since you hate me now.'
All hope lost, Ichigo turned, but it was a simple sound that made her stop. The screeching of a computer chair rolling backwards, hitting something hard, then stopping abruptly.
Footsteps. They were far away then grew closer and closer.
Hands were on her shoulders. They turned her around.
Eyes. Deep, gorgeous blue eyes looked at her with their own story, with their own regrets, with their own tears.
'No, you stupid girl.' He said, voice stone cold. 'I don't hate you… I could never…' He paused, regaining composure. 'How could I?'
Ichigo looked up at him. His face was hurt, his eyes showed betrayal and sorrow, the lines in his face showed learning's beyond her. His lips…
He gave her a hopeless smile. 'No matter how hard I tried to tell myself that you weren't interested, that you weren't mine, I couldn't believe it. Wouldn't believe it. It didn't matter how much I wanted to move on, I couldn't. I was stuck. And I still am…'
'I could never hate you, Ichigo. I never will, no matter what you do.'
Ichigo felt her control crumble, right then. 'I… I think I like you.' She said, voice small and slightly afraid.
His eyes softened. The hopeless smile just grew wider. 'I think I like you, too.' He paused, 'No. I'm sure of it.'
Without further ado, he pressed his lips to hers.
'Aishiteru, Ichigo Momomiya.'
File Name: Ichigo.doc
Type of file: Microsoft Word Document
Opens with: Microsoft Office Word
Location: C:\Documents and Settings\Ryou.Shirogane\Restricted Access
Size: 23.5 KB (24,064 Bytes)
Size on Disc: 24.0 (24,576 Bytes)
Contents:
Ichigo. Oh, god. I think I love her. No, I know I love her.
What do I do? I don't know what to do… Keiichiro…
Created by: Ryou Shirogane
Date Created: Yesterday, 23 January, 2007 (2:44 AM)
…
File Name: Ichigo 2.doc
Type of file: Microsoft Word Document
Opens with: Microsoft Office Word
Location: C:\Documents and Settings\Ryou.Shirogane\Restricted Access
Size: 19.5 KB (20,064 Bytes)
Size on Disc: 20.0 (20,576 Bytes)
Contents:
…Nevermind.
Created by: Ryou Shirogane
Date Created: Today, 24 January 2007 (4:45 PM)
End Note: My first RxI fanfiction is finito! My gosh, I have found myself loving this more than anything else I have ever created. Of course, I realise that the plot needs a little more work, but it was all that I could come up with on such short notice.
Hope you enjoyed it. Can't wait to see what you guys think. Please, review.
Love,
Exangeline.