WOW... That had to have been one of the strangest dreams I've ever had and believe me I've had some pretty weird ones. Especially since moving here to 'Forks' Washington, a little place about four hours away from 'Seattle', to live with my dad.
But hey, I'm getting ahead of myself, first off my name is Isabella Marie Swan, Bella to my friends which is funny because until I came here to the wettest place on earth, (well not really but it sometimes feels that way) I didn't really have any friends, acquaintances and people you nod to in passing, yes, but no one close like I have now. I'm kind of shy and blush at the least little thing and "oh yeah" let's not forget, what a super klutz I am.
So what else can I tell you about myself, well I have long brown hair and dark brown eyes, stand at about five foot four inches and have the palest skin on anyone I'd ever seen until I met 'The Cullens'. Figure wise I'm okay but nothing special, basically just all around average. I don't like fashion very much as it tends to draw too much attention to me, not to mention how expensive keeping up with fads can be and that's something to be avoided as far as I'm concerned on both counts. I do enough attention-grabbing what with my continual face planting and tripping up over thin air, this guarantees everyone a good laugh at least once a day.
My dad 'Charlie' or 'Chief Swan' to the local inhabitants of 'Forks' due to him being the Chief of Police for this area, says if he drew a chalk line on the floor I'd trip over it, "ha, ha".
Anyway, I'm a seventeen-year-old junior in High School, who loves literature and used be found reading, sometimes re-reading at any given time. That was before 'Edward', my very unusual boyfriend. My life now consists of two parts, 'the before Edward' and 'the since Edward'.
Before he came into my life I was a reasonably sane, no-nonsense, hard-working and to be honest boringly ordinary clumsy girl, but a decision maker. I lived in 'Phoenix' Arizona, with my mum 'Renee'. We plodded along together very well, her having the time of her life and me running the house, paying the bills and making sure we ate on a regular basis. Then she met 'Phil', the love of her life. He's a little younger, but a great guy and he can handle mum way better than I ever did. So that was the main reason for me coming to my dad's place, to let them be alone in their honeymoon phase, which shows no sign of stopping by the way.
The since, started two days after I arrived here and took my dad's lifestyle by the scruff of the neck and made some serious but necessary sweeping changes, more home cooking, less eating at the diner, more veggies, less pizza, that kind of thing. Wait till he sees how much money this will save him in the long run. There's a Scottish saying I read in a book once (then had to Google it) that say's "Mony a Mickle, maks a Muckle", basically meaning if you watch the cents, the dollars will soon build up. That's the way we live because although we are not a poor family, we are defiantly not loaded either.
So onto my first day at 'Forks High' and my first sight of 'The Cullens'. I felt that had to be the most nerve-racking and exhausting day I've ever had, but I couldn't have been more wrong, there would be worse ones and amazingly spectacular days to come. Within minutes of seeing those absurdly beautiful people, I knew they were more, just so much more. I can't understand how no one else picked up on all the little things like I did that first day. The stillness, the striking similarities for supposedly unrelated teenagers, them not eating and knowing they were talking but without them showing any outward signs of this. It would be weeks before I found out what they really were.
The funniest thing was they really thought they were blending in, as if. They wear designer clothes courtesy of 'Alice', drive expensive cars maintained by 'Rosalie' and looking like they should be in the movies not attending a backwater high school. Everyone else avoided and ignored them as much as one can ignore a family of Vampires sitting in your midst, yes I said Vampires.
Being with 'Edward' is like a never-ending rollercoaster ride, just when you think your stomach has settled, it plummets once again and your heart is permanently in your mouth. This is one of the main reason why I have become a tad dependant on, not only 'Edward' but all of the 'Cullens', especially 'Jasper' since he is an empath and can manipulate your feelings and he exudes a wonderful calmness, that makes you want to be around him, they are so much stronger, definitely in 'Emmett's' case, faster, smarter than everyone else here in 'Forks' and little by little I gave up my free will to them, mostly 'Edward and Alice', thinking that they knew better what was right for me and I did it willingly, up until now. This brings me to the reason for my strange dream, some might say that it was a warning, a portent of things to come, believe me, I am sitting up and taking notice for the first time in weeks. We have only been back in 'Forks' for a short time after a horrendous mad dash to 'Phoenix' to avoid me being drained dry by a crazy nomadic vampire who wanted to kill me for sport and to antagonise 'Edward', you know the kind, it's just a game and who cares if the human dies, "I do".
So here I am in a leg brace, ribs bandaged up and still having to get 'Alice' to help me shower because there is no way I would ever ask 'Charlie', No just No, he's my dad. I was being my usually just go along with it, self trying not to squirm and find a position which didn't hurt my ribs as much as I wondered once again why she felt the need to continually give me makeovers, was I that plain and dowdy to her she needed to cover me up. When I suddenly realised 'Alice' was talking about the perfect ball gown for me that 'Edward' would love, stilettos or as I call them death traps and up do's, I'm seventeen not thirty-seven I've never worn my hair up in anything but a ponytail for work and gym or doing housework. I glanced up at 'Edward' and saw him wince and look away changing the subject, "Oh, oh" I thought what have they got planned now; their mantra was always all about human experiences which I shouldn't miss out on.
Even the ones I would never have participated in had I never met them, like dancing and parties, especially if it meant dressing up "Ugh". Then it dawned on me the prom, 'Forks High' prom was Saturday night the day after next, I had seen all the posters and flyers around the school telling everybody what the theme was etc, etc and I had dismissed it from my mind as it was not relevant to me at all and now they were just going to override my dislikes and wishes, dress me up like a 'Barbie doll' and parade me around like some pampered show dog. This stung more because 'Edward' knew how I felt about dancing, after the debacle of "The Spring Dance" when I had turned down not one but three offers to attend. All that when I at least had two legs to stand on and not one like now.
I got slowly to my feet and started to walk down the stairs from 'Alice's' bedroom, smiling at 'Carlisle and Esme' as I passed them in the main living area, they both looked a little concerned, as did 'Jasper' due to the building hurt, anger and annoyance within me. I was actually at the front door before 'Edward' caught up with me and asked if everything was alright, tacking on his usual "Love" to try and soften me up when he realised that I was not happy with him at all. I scoffed and turned to the rest of the family and asked 'Emmett' if he could take me home as I still couldn't drive with my cast on, 'Edward' said he would take me home and "not to be so silly".
It's funny how it's the little things that become the last straw, for the first time in months I drew myself up to my tallest and once more asked 'Emmett' for a lift home ignoring 'Edward ' completely. At that 'Alice' came flying down the stairs and demanded to know why I was being selfish and spoiling this for everyone else, obviously, I was no one or my opinion didn't really count. In an extremely cool tone I asked her how many 'Proms' she had been to since she was turned, she just stared at me with her hands on her hips and I continued by saying she managed to attend without me then so she could do so once again.
By now 'Edward' was having a six-way conversation with his family and as per usual I was the last person he consulted, with his "I just assumed" and "Not to be missed human experience", I shook my head sadly at him and let him know he shouldn't assume my bedroom window would be open tonight. For the very first time I looked at them all and was disappointed in what I was seeing, the arrogance, the confusion as to why I didn't just comply, only 'Jasper' had the decency to be abashed as he got the full force of my emotions.
Throwing my hands up in the air and asking was anyone going to take me home or was I supposed to walk there in my cast. 'Carlisle' jumped up and said he would and also he'd check my ribs when we arrived at my dad's house. Finally, I managed to get out of their house before I said or did something I might regret later, I have a tendency to cry when I'm angry and that was so not going to happen. The drive home was quiet and 'Carlisle' looked pensive and deep in thought, as we pulled up in front 'Charlie's', he spoke softly to me as if not wanting to upset me more. I wasn't angry with him only his so-called son and daughter, who thought they could just walk all over me and didn't expect me to mind at all.
As the good doctor re-strapped my ribs once we were inside, asking on a scale of one to ten just how sore they still were, I told him between four and six depending on the time of day and letting him know that the cast throwing me off balance was not helping in the slightest, he looked at me then and apologised for not taking that into consideration. He went on to say he was not aware how much 'Alice and Edward' had been pushing me into things I didn't get a say in doing and asked if they even consulted me at all. I laughed and said no they never did, quoting 'Alice's' "after all we know best", I sighed and said it was partly my fault as I rarely offered an opinion or disagreed with their plans. But this time it was a public function and I hadn't even been asked or consulted as to whether I felt fit enough to go or indeed did I actually want to.
As he left I asked him to remind 'Edward' I wanted time to think and that I would get my dad to drop me off at school tomorrow. Seeing as 'Charlie' was still working, I made up a plate of food for him to have when he got in and I went up to bed slowly so as not to fall, if 'Edward' had been here he would have scooped me up to save my leg but forgetting every time he or any of them did this it hurt my ribs. Once I had managed to get ready for bed at my own pace, I pulled out my copy of "Wuthering Heights" and started to re-read it one more time. I must have fallen asleep whilst reading and that brings me to my very strange dream, not on the same par as the Vampire and Werewolf ones I've had in the past but just as strange and possibly more frightening in its normalcy.
I had woken in a cold sweat at seeing myself as a living doll caked in make-up, being primped and preened by 'Alice' and dressed to suit what 'Edward' would like, not the 'Bella' that first attracted him but a strange "Stepford Wife" type of 'Bella' who sat motionless like a Vampire but still human waiting for one of them to come and play with me, before putting me back in my box so I wouldn't get messed up and need to be re-done by 'Alice' to make me presentable. I had no opinions, no thoughts that were my own, I was truly owned by them, no I was their toy.
I glance over at my alarm clock seeing it was almost time to get up anyway, I need a shower and for once I was going to do it by myself. I'm not helpless or a baby I can do this if I take my time. Once the decision was made it wasn't that hard or bad, now to try something daring, dress myself for once without 'Alice's' input. Where on earth were my clothes, I stare at the array of skirts and dresses before me and I am livid. Then I spotted it right at the back of my cupboard a black bag, getting down on my hands and knees I pull it out into the daylight and peer in, "yup" I thought so, my jeans and tops are all bundled inside. Now I know some of my stuff is past its best but not all of it is rubbish even if 'Alice' thinks it is. My mum scrapped together the cash so I would have some decent clothes to wear here in 'Forks.
So retrieving my good jeans the ones that actually make my bum look half decent and then turning to her stuff I find a top that isn't blue, sheesh there are more colours in the spectrum. "But blue's 'Edwards' favourite colour on you", I can imagine hearing it in my head; well the jeans are blue so he can like it or lump it. I know she has seen my choices and that she won't be pleased and I really don't care and just to rub it in I put on my one well-worn converse trainer, Looking at myself in the mirror I put on a touch of lip gloss and that's it. My skin is my best feature it's flawless so why cover it up or clog up my pores with unneeded make-up.
While I do this I think directly at her that I want all of the things I don't like or will never wear out of my wardrobe and gone by the time I get off work tonight, it's not as if she didn't already know this she just disregarded the vision because it didn't fit in with her plans. Once downstairs I have breakfast with 'Charlie' and tell him I want a lift to school, this surprises him but he says nothing. When I arrive at school they are both waiting for me and 'Alice' looks totally upset with me, she starts right in as they reach me. Why wasn't I wearing all the nice things she got for me, I told her if she liked them that much she should wear them because I never would. So far 'Edward' has said nothing and I can't decide what he's thinking about this change in my attitude, but I will not be backing down.
Meanwhile 'Alice' is still grumbling and whining in my ear and it's getting on my nerves, has no one ever said no to her before because she really does not like this turn of events at all. So before I storm off in a strop I ask her what's the point in having visions if she just disregards them to suit herself, her answer doesn't just surprise me when I see all the other 'Cullens' heads swivel to look at her, as she admits she always has done. Now this changes everything, they all start reeling off events covering the last fifty years and ask if she chose the best outcome for them or herself on each occasion, after a super fast out of human ears range conversation 'Rosalie' storms off back to the car and 'Jasper' is on the phone I assume to 'Carlisle'. I don't need to have visions to see a family meeting in the near future.
'Edward' is now looking at me strangely and it almost feels that he is running our whole relationship through his head and then looking at the times 'Alice' told him what he should do and realising maybe for the first time he shouldn't have been asking her but me instead. I hope he understands that I didn't take a stand to hurt him but to let him see I have a voice and sometimes, "hey" I'm right and he is not.
After all, being one hundred and seven doesn't give you brains, just experience if you're prepared to heed it. I keep telling him that just because he can read the surface thoughts of the people around him, doesn't mean that's all there is to that person, after all, how many times have we all thought about killing someone, but it is just a passing thought never meant to be heard because we will never act on it.
This new revelation has lead to a new level of communication with the whole family, they now ask me would I like or do I want something and not assuming they know better than me or that I will make the wrong choice. Of course, I will because that's what being human is all about we learn from our mistakes not avoid the whole thing by using visions, as they have been doing for more than fifty years. As for 'Alice' she has been learning not to jump in and let us all make our own decisions first and also let us change our minds too, she now only steps in if it's life-threatening or could give away their secret.
Just in case you were wondering, the prom came and went and we did not go, in fact, we went to 'Port Angeles' to the cinema, held hands and shared gentle but passionate kisses in the back row. This I told him was an extremely important rite of passage for all humans, as well as being fun. He's learning slowly how to relax and stop taking everything so seriously, I tend to forget he really is only a typical insecure seventeen years old boy deep down inside.