Hi! Thank you for reading this story; in case you recognize it, it's because I have it published on Ao3^^ I do not own Naruto!
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Kinai fell in love with him before she had come to realize her own tender feelings herself. His name had been Yashi of the Yuragi Clan -who she hadn't even noticed in her Academy class, to be frank- and then suddenly he had been her commander in the newly announced Second Shinobi War. He was the leader of the Closerange to Midrange Combatants division, Sandaime Mizukage's first student, and her leader and commander. She wasn't sure what had drawn her in so much. If it was his unyielding devotion, or his levelheadedness and dry sense of humor (or maybe the fact . It took her a whole year of blood, sweat and tears but in the end, it showed results. The result being a swelling stomach that got her sent home from the battlefields. And Kinai couldn't have ever felt happier, knowing that Yashi felt the same. Of course she was deathly worried about her ravenette fiancé; the nagging fear of him being taken from her was a constant dark, swirling cloud in the back of her head. Her own excessive amount of losses served as a constant reminder of how fickle their lives truly were.
Yuragi Nagisa was born towards the later half of the Second Shinobi War, and was immediately rendered fatherless. Yashi died during a mission he had been executing at enemy territory, Konohagakure's borders, murdered by the famed White Fang of the Leaf -although nobody knew that at the time, it would take two days for the news to reach Kirigakure no Sato.
"She's so beautiful." Nami complimented her best friend, smiling at the new mother. Flipping a grayish blue bang over her slim shoulder, she stared at the small bundle in Kinai's arms. Kinai smiled up at her from the white hospital bed, pale cerise-violet eyes brightening in pride and honest appreciation at her civilian friend's praise. Words didn't seem to coherently form, so the new mother just grinned toothily at her blue haired friend, showing off rows of pearly white teeth.
"Have you decided for a name yet?" Nami asked Kinai, who nodded brightly in return. The hospital room was bland and ashen, drawn curtains hiding the window projecting the gray buildings clung to by balmy mist.
"Yashi and I agreed on Nagisa." The golden haired mother spoke, nodding to herself as she gazed at the small infant cradled in her embrace.
The following day when returning to her home from the hospital, she gleefully showed her little baby around the house in a energetic tour, banning all thoughts of blood and screams and fearangerbloodlust. Occasional gurgles escaped the small child, and the mother didn't hold back on coos and gushes as she held odd conversations with her baby. Her baby that had been created between two battles whilst her friends were still on an after-high from a killing spree.
And then the news hit. Describing the devastation Kinai felt at loosing Yashi, was something she didn't find possible. That searing anguish that burned from the inside, like a thousands of smoldering kunai and freezing glaciers had suddenly habituated themselves inside her chest, in her very heart, and threatening to claw her apart into countless pieces of sorrow-drenched anger.
Nagisa became a pillar, unbeknownst to the infant. She was the candle lighting the darkness in Kinai, the threads that kept the blonde's sanity intact, the object of a doting mother. To Kinai, Nagisa was everything. Nagisa was her beloved lifeline.
Nagisa was what banned her dreams and nightmares of war and death and maniacs from become a reality. (Kinai regretted nothing, though she didn't understand. Didn't understand why she couldn't just love murder like her friend for it would make it all easier and more bearable.)
But it the momentary flickering happiness of motherhood was shadowed by the looming darkness of raging war, and Kirigakure -like all other Villages- couldn't miss a single ninja able to fight. And when Nagisa was only eleven months old, Kinai left for the battlefields again to join her comrades. The gossipy neighbors, of course, found a mother leaving her child unsightly. (Nagisa wouldn't think of it but the recesses of her mind never forgot.)
"Nagisa-chan, you wouldn't mind helping your Haha, would you?"
It had been one of the Jounin commanders, the one in charge of the Sealing Department, who had uttered those words to the four years old child. Aoichi the Seal Master of Kirigakure, but she hadn't known that back then as he expectantly waited at her porch. If she had known what he had meant, she would've... well, she would probably still have gone with him, but at least been a bit more prepared.
"You can help her. Don't you want to?"
If she would mind helping her mother? She'd do anything. Kinai was almost always gone, so her childish, naive logic immediately pieced Helping-Mum and Mum-Will-Come-Home together. She missed her Kaa-chan; incredibly so. Even though living with Aunt Nami was nice, Nami wasn't her... Her Kaa-chan. (She'd rather Nami and all of them died and Kinai came back, than her mum passing by occasionally with hollow eyes and wicked gleams and then leave again.)
"Hai, Shinobi-san!" She recklessly blurted out, large silver pools staring up at the turquoise eyed man at her doorstep. He nodded in satisfaction, smiling down at the mousy haired child and holding his scarred hand out for her to take. Without any trace of hesitation she grasped his larger, more calloused and scarred one in her paler and softer one, and he led her away from Nami's house and down the foggy streets of Kiri. It was end of March, and they were lucky it wasn't cascading fridgid sprays of rain like it usually did during early spring. Instead thick tendrils of swirling mist crept along the entire Village and protected the area in its moist blanket, pressing against every crack in the buildings and every weakness it spotted.
"What do I need to do?" She eagerly questioned, unblinkingly staring up at him through pale silver eyes brimming with conviction. He gave her a smooth smile, all knives and lies, the slightly tanned skin around his veridian eyes crinkling as he did so.
"Kirigakure needs you to guard something." He told her with a meaningful look, and then deliberately stressed; "Something incredibly important."
Her eyes widened in excitement, and the hand that clasped his tightened. She said; "What is it? What is it?!"
And Aoichi knew she was hooked, like a fish pierced on a stake.
"Do you know of chakra?" He inquired after a few seconds of careful thinking, throughouly scrutinizing the small girl at his side. She wore a simple blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her small elbows, wide-legged beige pants, feet tucked into a pair of gray ninja sandals, and donned a long sleeveless jacket open at the front. Nothing about her scrawny appearance would ever hint that she was the inheritor of the Kotai Chakra.
'Of course,' he quietly mused, her Kekkei Genkai paled in comparison to the Sharingan, Moukuton or Metal Release when it came to fulfilling this particular duty, but it was still far more qualified than any other Kekkei Genkai of Kirigakure. He masterfully hid a scoff at the thought of this duty falling in the hands of that blasted Hoozuki Clan. He didn't particularly like them and the feeling was mutual. They could go and spontaneously evaporate for all he cared.
But Sealing Master Aoichi supposed that Nagisa's average appearance just made her even more fit for the job. She'd do just fine. He hoped. Sacrificing one child to save hundreds of others wasn't something he would regret; he didn't particularly care as long as it wasn't him or his son. What was done had to be done, that was just how it was. (He prides himself in shutting out the snarling voices in his head that Kiri's system fed.)
"I know what chakra is! Nami-san and Haha taught me all about it last month!" She exclaimed proudly, jovial grin stretching across her face as her eyes twinkled in pride and glee. Aoichi nodded at her, smiling assuringly at her as if to confirm that it was good that she knew. This caused her to swell up and a boastful closed eyed smile stretched her lips as they continued down the streets. Every cobblestone was slightly moist on the surface, and on occasionally sunny days the flimsy layer of water on the stones would've shone brightly and lit up the entire Village in white golden glimmering glows of sunny reflections. But today's weather forecast was its typical dense mist, so of course it didn't happen.
Suddenly Nagisa furrowed her eyebrows, racking her brain to remember something positively important. Nervously she questioned; "What was I supposed to guard again?"
Aochi glanced down at her, giving her small, chubby hand a reassuring squeeze as he smiled amiably; "Chakra. An incredible amount of it at that."
Nagisa could practically hear a line go dead in the background, and hung her head in unsatisfactory devastation. "Chakra?"
"Hai." He replied breezily, smooth smile still intact. And Nagisa couldn't help but to emit a gloomy aura around her, heaving a deep sigh that made Aoichi smother a chuckle. A child through and through. A slightly coddled one at that.
"But... But that sounds so incredibly boring," the mousy haired Yuragi complained indignantly, flailing around with her free arm.
"Do trust me when I tell you it is not boring." He drawled without a glance at her, but didn't say anything more. Nagisa looked highly unconvinced, and the Seal Master could work with that. It wasn't like he was obliged to be the one to tell her what exactly she was guarding anyway. He was more than happy to leave that duty in the hands of someone else. Yuragi Nagisa turned her pools of molten silver upwards, to the impenetrable mist and the looming silhouettes of steep mountains in the background. She was finally going got be able to help her Kaa-chan. She had heard her talk about how there was nothing great about war, but the three years old couldn't hep but to wonder. Wasn't there any pride in fighting for your family, friends, comrades and home? Wasn't there a special feeling? Kinai had told her the negative.
The two Kiri-inhabitants rounded a corner, leaving the Clan-Reserved part of the Caste systemized Village and entering the part secluded for Shinobi only. Large, cylindrical shaped buildings rose up around them, colored in different shades of white, pale gray, and even some shades of a bleached beige. Verdant greenery grew on most roofs, and the small girl wondered if the other Villages really were as different as Kinai and Nami described them as. The Mizukage Office was the largest and widest of the building in the Villages, and was connected to the four parts of the Village by five sturdy stone bridges that led to each part of the Village. As they made their way up one of the bridges, Nagisa looked down at the deep sloshing water below and let go of his calloused hand, momentarily missing the comforting warmth as her skin was exposed to the thick air.
Summoned caimans leisurely swam around in the water, teeth glinting and scales gleaming like blades, some dozing of on the warm stones on the grassy, steep banks, and a few hunting the terrified koi. An oversized caiman with yellow eyes was having a ridiculously good time with playing with its terrified pray. Aoichi feared the wrath of his summons if they ever realized what his leader's summons did to their brethren. He'd have to try to talk Mizukage-sama out of letting his beloved caiman terrorize the koi so freely.
"One day, I'm gonna summon caiman too. And I'll be even more awesome than Sandaime-sama is when he summons them!" Nagisa decided resolutely. Aoichi let his dubious and condescending emotions rule freely with his expressions, with the doomed hopes of her getting a hint. She didn't. She was too busy staring at the yellow-eyed caiman ripping the large koi apart, something akin to amazement in her silver eyes. At least she had the right approach; Aoichi despised those rich civilian brats who threw up at the sight of butchers killing animals on the streets.
"Reptiles aren't what the Yuragi Clan usually summons." Aoichi diplomatically tried to steer her off track, and she seemed more than gleeful to take the bait.
"Oh yeah? Like what then? What do we summon?" She stumbled over her words in sheer excitement, staring up at the Seal Master with genuine curiosity and longing for knowledge.
"The more common ones your Clan use to summon are hyraxes, raccoons, red pands and fossa," he hastily informed, masking vexed impatience without effort. "Mammals, mostly. You can forget about ever summoning Caimans."
"But-"
"Ever."
Nagisa gave the brutal caimans down below a longing stare filled with guilt, as if she had just broken a lifelong oath to one day summon them. In order to prevent her from taking an uncalled swim with the hungry reptiles, Aoichi snagged her pale wrist and unceremoniously dragged her unimpressive form away from the reptiles. He didn't like how they looked at her. It reminded him too much of how he had used to look at pocky and Suna's canon fodder in his youth, and he deduced that the four years old looked like a appetizing snack to them. (There are scareams and he smirks sharply and there's blood-)
"Where are we going? Say, are we seeing the Mizukage? Are we!? I think I've seen him around, yeah! He has pearls in his hair, have you seen them!? It look kinda pretty, are they expensive? I want them to! And why does he always look like he's eating a sour lemon? Does he actually eat a lemon all the time!? In secret!? If he doesn't like it, then why does he insist on eating them? And his eyes are weird. They're totally pitch black, like, no white at all! Is that normal? Is he sick? Should we get the medics!? Is he... is he going to die? Are we heading to his funeral right now? Why didn't they heal him on time-"
Aoichi closed his eyes, and for a brief moment he actually convinced himself that Nagisa wasn't there, pretended not to feel his Kiri-kunai weigh in his holster with promises. Then, her yipping was more than audible again, and he almost fulfilled her wish for a closeup with the caimans, but managed to crush that urge without even batting an eye. Part of him found consolation that something else was soon going to have to put up with her for the rest of her existence.
Nagisa abruptly fell silent when they entered the large, high-roofed lobby. Never had she seen so many interesting objects, pretty ornaments and unique artifacts in one place. The entire floor was a smooth, pale slate gray stone. The walls were a creamy white, with navy decorations near the floor and banners with intricate patterns hung up against the ornate walls. The room was illuminated by a large, flat crystal in the middle of the room, situated in the middle of an icy pond with constant ripples sent across its uneasy surface, even though there was no cause for it. Pedestals with the oddest objects were on display, pushed against the walls with systematic care.
Against one of the walls, three proud portraits were at display. One of each Mizukage. Nagisa decided that the first one looked plainly fishy, with his odd misty eyes staring into different directions, large nose, scar and beard. The second one lacked eyebrows, and something about the arrogant curve of his lips made the Yarugi decide that he was just as fishy as the first one. The third one had a less fishy factor, but his black sclera made his fishiness rate go up significantly.
She had no opportunity to linger. Aoichi led her up a wide staircase to the right, and they walked in silence through a large, curved corridor, filled with the same banners from the lobby together with small glowing crystals along the floor. Nagisa's head buzzed uncomfortably after a while, shoulders tensing as she neared the sole door at the end of the well lit corridor. The banners had gone from white with black patterns to black with white patterns, and it made her see odd spots if she concentrated on a banner for too long. She decided it wasn't worth it too try to figure out what the odd scribbles meant.
"That isn't the Mizukage's office." Nagisa suddenly blurted out when the shoji door -with odd scarlet symbols embroidered on the papery cloth- soundlessly slid open for them. The room had a single, small, round window to the right, giving her a detailed view upon the Mountains aptly named 'Kiri no Yamayama', surrounding Kiri. It took her a while before she understood that the window had to have some magnifying force in them, because she had never seen that mountains from that close yet. Leaving the Village was strictly forbidden unless you had permission, after all.
"No, it's not." Aoichi dismissed flatly, ignoring her bemused 'But I thought-' as he shut the door behind them. The room was almost entirely bare, spare for a single high table and a high stool in the middle of the room. The walls were either a blinding white or a Kiri-blue, and the floor was a smooth slate gray with black speckles and veins across it.
Nagisa's brows furrowed in confusion when the air above the stool suddenly shimmered, and the Mizukage faded into view perched on the stool. His long, smooth hair that had once been a rich black had now faded slightly, but the threaded pearls in his tresses that formed a circle over the crown of his head were ever present. He wore his typical Mizukage robes, save for the hat, and also donned his signature poncho-like scarf around his neck. On his shoulder there was a small, baby caiman comfortably seated, its lime green eyes watching it all with keen interest. She could've sworn it smirked toothily at her, eyes flashing with unknown emotion as it stared her down with condescendence. Thankfully, though, the Mizukage kept his unnerving eyes firmly shut. Like always. He rarely opened his eyes. Behind him stood a man in his early twenties, perhaps even just a teen, with blue hair that boldly jutted upwards and broke various rules of gravity, the signature Kiri outfit consisting of a blue pinstriped cloth worn as arm guards and leg guards, of which the latter merged into the sandals. Underneath this, he wore black garbs over which he wore the Village's standard gray flak jacket. His most noticeable feature had to be the black eyepatch, though, together with the golden earrings dangling over his shoulders.
His metallic slate-blue orb followed their every move, his generous mouth firmly curved downwards in what was not quite a frown. The Mizukage had yet to budge, and Nagisa wondered if her suspicions of him being dead were true. She had yet to see him breathe!
"Yuragi-chan, Aoichi-san." The pearl-bearing Kage greeted mellowly, one of his hands coming up to scratch the baby reptile on his shoulder with a single finger.
"Mizukage-sama." Aoichi bowed his head in greeting acknowledgement, secretly shooting the small caiman a dirty glare that made the reptile show its rows of sharp teeth. Then he nodded at the blue haired man. "Ao-san."
The blue haired man nodded back, not a sound escaping him. She wondered what it all was about. She had to guard some chakra, for Kami's sake. Was it really necessary to bring in the Kage of Kirigakure and some guy was was -clearly- overqualified to hand her some chakra to guard?
"I assume that you know why you are here?" The close-eyed man turned to face her, and she could see that he had gotten far more frown lines in reality than on the picture in the lobby. The picture had to have been taken when he had first become the Mizukage, because he looked decidedly much older now.
"I'm here to guard chakra!" She instantly replied, shrugging her hand out of Aoichi's firm grip and stared up at the seated man.
"Ah, yes. Yes, that may very well be," he hummed in agreement, one of his unnerving eyes cracking open to stare at Aoichi, who froze under the scrutiny of his esteemed leader. Thoughts about saving the koi were abandoned.
Just as the brunette thought he would be sushi-fied for not telling the small girl the exact details, the Sandaime said; "I hope that Ao-san here will be good enough. I am aware you specifically requested the Sensory Master, but he was busy and I believed Ao's prodigious progress with sensory would suffice. Even if he's rather young."
Aoichi was more than happy to mutely nod instead of vocalizing his thoughts, and finally the Mizukage closed his black pool again. It lifted a tension from her shoulders, one she hadn't even noticed being there.
"Lay down, small Yuragi." The Mizukage said and patted the operating table next to him. For a second she regarded the table, but then paddled across the room towards the two others, Aoichi stealthily trailing after her. Before she could attempt to climb up the table to attempt to get up, Aoichi rigidly heaved her onto it and Nagisa looked around from her higher position, as of expecting to suddenly see something wondrous. Of course, the room was just as plain as before and she sighed in defeat, almost sulking.
"I've gotten the scroll," Ao suddenly spoke up, voice dry and clear, fishing out a thick scroll from seemingly nowhere. The air around it appeared to be denser somehow, and even though Nagisa was most certainly no sensor nor had any aptitude for sensory, even her sensed tingled uncomfortably as she looked at it. The veins around the eye behind the eyepatch bulged out oddly all of the sudden. "After this we'll have to burn it. It's almost completely destroyed from the inside out, so we'll have to hurry if we don't want any unwanted surprise attacks. It won't last much longer."
Aoichi nodded, clearly understanding what it all was about, and the Sandaime once again found a sudden interest with the caiman perched on his shoulder, scratching its scales. Nagisa eyed the scroll curiously, a quizzical expression perfectly in place as her eyes shone in inquisitive wonder, nose scrunched up as she tried to figure it all out.
"Relax and lay down. Bunch your shirt up, I need to see your stomach." Aoichi instructed, any trace of amiability gone and replaced by a war-hardened mask of business. Nagisa laid down, staring at the roof above her as her shirt was dragged up by the turquoise eyed male. She almost giggled when a brush slick with black paint started drawing on her stomach, but she forced herself to lay still. Her entire stomach tingled perilously as odd inscriptions were placed on her pale skin, a little to the right at her ribs and stomach. It felt as if all her muscles turned to jello, which was a decidedly odd and queer feeling.
The Sandaime opened the scroll, many intricate seals decorating its white inner surface, and the air around it seemed to grow even denser and thicker, the edges of the paper moving ever so slightly, as if it were alive. Then Aoichi made on odd handseal with his fingers, and both the scroll and the new seal on Nagisa's stomach glowed faintly in blue. A single bubble escaped the scroll, gently drifting towards the seal and hovering above it for a few seconds before landing on her stomach. But it didn't pop. Instead it slowly sunk through her skin and into the fresh black markings marring her skin, leaving no trace at all.
She stared, barely daring to breathe. (She was three and she was lost and there was fear whilst Kinai's voice resounded through her head-)
Slowly, thick, white mist started floating from the scroll towards her stomach, small bubbles visible inside the opaque haze. Soon, also this foggy substance eased its way into her seal, and Nagisa barely suppressed the urge to skirm around uncomfortably. It felt like something frigid was slowly seeping through her skin and muscles, something almost slimy. As one of the bubbles melted into her, she shifted around in discomfort.
The second her muscles tightened, even if only marginally, it felt like her entire stomach was being drenched in corrosives from the inside out. She shot up straight, screaming in anguish as her skin and muscles seared and burned in acidic fires invisible to the eye. The mist, now unable to fully penetrate the skin, took its chance to waft away from her body and spread towards the far corner of the room.
"Subdue her!" Aoichi hissed as his hand trembled from the force it took to properly guide the moisture through her now resisting muscles, though his eyes had brightened and glittered as her pained voice echoed through the room. As if tugged on by fishing hooks, the escaped mist was slowly pulled back towards Nagisa's seal through sheer willpower.
Ao said something, voice muddled and unclear as if he were far away. His face was just as unfettered as before, and the Mizukage quipped a slow smile with the qualities of a poisonous snake.
She only screamed, squirming away and attempting to curl up into a fetal position to lessen the excruciating pain. (She regretted something and everything and nothing and there was painpainpain-)
(Nagisa was three and she looked around her and realized Kinai was gone. Eyes lingered and distantly she understood that she looked cleaner and prettier than the girls with bodies as underdeveloped as hers. She fisted the fabric of her shirt, hissing like and eel; "I'm not for sale!")
(Nagisa ia four and ran through the streets of her admittedly safe neighborhood. Occasional beggars no older than her follow, but she had food and warmth in her stomach and has ran and climbed since she could walk-)
Nagisa stiffened as the Sandaime's hand suddenly rested against her paled forehead, the caiman's eyes glowing in the blurry space. The rest of the room disappeared into a distant, hazy fog, together with the searing pain of her stomach. There was nothing anymore, and Nagisa closed her eyes as she succumbed under the oppressive Genjutsu. There was no reason to stay awake, no reason to fight. There was only a void.
"...Have you done... My child-"
The voice was shrill, thickly coated in panic and disbelief, and seemed to extremely far away. Nagisa felt like she was on the soft, sandy bottom of a warm lake, gently moving along with the waves far above. The voices were up there, somewhere above the shimmering distant surface. So incredibly remote, away from her comfortably lulled existence.
"...Sealing completed... Nothing you can do..."
The voices were arguing, Nagisa knew that much. The surface gradually came nearer, watery beams consisting of golden rays of sunlight breaking through the water and shining onto her pale face. She blinked, cracking her eyes open an immediately closed them again as the surface neared itself and she willed herself back closer to the bottom again.
"...Explicitly told you I didn't want her too... Against my consent..."
"...Sandaime-sama and I agreed on... Not your decision... For the sake of the Village... You have no damn say... Baka..."
The surface was coming too near; she wanted nothing more than to go back to her warm sleep on the bottom of the lake, to stay away from harsh reality of loud voices and disarray. But the nearer the surface, the faster she floated up towards it. Opening her mouth to scream that she wanted back to her lulling sleep deep in the lake, bubbles escaped her mouth and she flailed her arms around as the currents were suddenly swooshing her upwards against her will. And then-
The mousy haired child flashed her eyes open, blinking as her eyes adjusted to the faint light of her living room. The warm beige walls, wooden black and white table, and blue sofa filled her vision and made her relax back into the familiar, slightly plush pillows and warm couch. There was only one light lit and that was in the other end of the room, casting a warm glow over the room. It took her a few seconds to locate the source of the agitated voices, and saw Aoichi and Kinai at the doorframe leading to the kitchen and dinner room, voices lowered into agitated whispers of the conversation they just had.
"Kaa-chan?" Nagisa voice trembled as she sleepily blinked towards her mother's short frame. The voices were immediately silenced and Kinai came hurrying forth, cerise eyes warm and worried. Her pale golden brown hair was in a messy braid reaching her waist, and Nagisa blinked in confusion. Her mother never wore braids or any kinds of plaits.
"Nagi-chan, how are you feeling? Are you alright? Does anything hurt?" Kinai fell down on her knees next to the sofa, gently correcting the pink blanket that had almost slipped of her small child. Nagisa blinked sluggishly, and her silver eyes brightened for a moment as she remember the searing pain she had experienced before falling into the watery state of unconsciousness. Her body fell comfortably tired, like it would feel after one of those rare late dinners with her mother and they'd sit in front of the fire. Even if Nagisa was always too tired to sit in front of the hearth, she'd force herself to stay awake just to spend those extra moments with her mother. With Kinai, who was so rarely home.
"I'm fine," she yawned, rubbing the lingering sleep from her eyes with the back of her hand. Messy bangs jutted out in all directions, and Kinai threaded her fingers through the tresses and combed through them with nimble fingers. Nagisa's eyes closed again at the rhythmic touch, smiling contentedly at her mother's undivided, sweet attention.
Perhaps she had already helped her mother when unconscious, and that was why Kaa-chan was already home?
She would never be more wrong in her entire life.