I have a tip for you.
Never get your lover pregnant.
Especially if your lover, is a guy.
Apparently, they don't like the fact that there is a child in them. That and, there's a price to pay.
These prices are called : Mood Swings.
Mood Swing 1: Anger
"ROY GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!" Ed yelled at the top of his lungs.
"Yes?" I walked in very carefully, learning my lesson from last time where a vase was thrown at my skull, but hit the wall instead.
"I'm HUNGRY."
"Then eat something."
"DUMBASS IF I COULD GET UP I WOULD! BUT OH NO THE GREAT ROY MUSTANG HAD TO KNOCK ME AND PREVENT ME FROM BEING ABLE TO MOVE!"
Great the mood swing of the day, anger.
I hated these days.
He always took it out on me. It's not my fault that his experiments in the past caused a defect in his gametes, causing him to grow and egg or whatever.
I just sighed. "Yes Darling. What would you like to eat."
"I DON'T KNOW! IF I WAS ABLE TO MOVE I'D BE ABLE TO SEE WHAT WAS IN THE FRIDGE!"
Man. Sometimes I wish this never happened. But I have to admit, he looks pretty sexy when he's pregnant.
"Alright."
I walked out the room to have a pillow thrown at the back of my head, but I kept walking see there was no point in being yelled again.
Mood Swing 2: Lust
"Roy."
"Yea."
"I want you."
"…"
"And you know how I want you."
"…"
"Inside of…"
"Ok I got it."
You would think that the fact of having a child in you and not be the happiest person in the whole world about it would stay away from sex or anything pertaining to it for awhile. Oh how I was wrong. Though I have to say, I don't mind when Ed tries to get sexual, makes us both happy.
Mood Swing 3: Jealousy
How I hate Ed when he's jealous. If it was any other person or girl of a matter of fact, I would be able to do something about it however Ed being a guy (1) and an alchemist (2) it's very difficult to keep him…stable..
"I'M GOING TO FUCKEN KILL YOU"
"but I I…"
"BITCH! I SAW HOW YOU WERE LOOKING AT HIM!"
"I ju… I just. Want… wanted to take your order."
"LIES!"
Ed was almost across the table waving his human arm in the air like a maniac. The waitress was backing away frightened.
"Ed please calm down."
"OH SO NOW YOUR TAKING HER SIDE HUH! I SEE HOW IT IS"
"Ed that's not what I'm doing and you know it. I just want to have a nice dinner."
"OH SO NOW THE DINNERS MORE IMPORTANT THEN ME!"
I don't think I would be able to take anymore tonight…
Mood Swing 4 Shyness
"Ed are you hungry?"
"a lil" the little blonde alchemist whispered.
"Ed are you alright?"
Ed nodded like a little child burying his head in his legs.
"ok. Ill go get your food"
A small hand reached out to grab my jacket.
I turned around to see Ed holding onto it for dear life.
'Ed whats wrong"
Ed shook his head "Don't…don't leave"
This was the cutest sight ever.
"Ed, are you being shy?"
Ed's whole face turned bright red. I got my answer.
Mood Swing 5 Panicky
"ROYYY!! OMG ROY!!"
I rushed in. "What what, what's wrong Ed?"
"I think I just lost my cell phone."
"Huh?"
"I said I think I just lost my cell phone." A panicky Ed searching the whole room, throwing things aside and making a mess of the room.
"Uh Ed?"
"SHUT AND HELP ME LOOK!"
"Ed."
"LOOK"
"ED"
"WHAT"
"It's in your back pocket."
"Oh."
Rolling my eyes I walked out the door.
Five minutes later
"ROY!"
"What?"
"I THINK I LOST MY WATCH."
…
No More Mood Swings
"THANK GOD"
"Ed, I thought you didn't believe in god?"
"I was speaking hypothetically"
"Ah."
"Anyways. THANK GOD NO MORE PAIN."
"Yea thank god.." No more damn mood swing attacks and I got a sweet baby girl out of it.
Ed was rocking the baby in his arms.
"She looks like you."
Ed shook his head.
"Nah. She looks more like you."
"You know Ed, I have to tell you all the hell I've been through were really worth it."
"Hell YOU'VE been THROUGH?!?"
Aww Crap. After Pregnancy Mood Swings.