A/N: At ALA this year, us Alice cosplayers had a great photoshoot up on the eighteenth floor. One thing that happened, however, was the following conversation… Out of context, it just seemed very… well… Alex requested that I type it up.
Warnings: Innuendo
Alice's does not belong to me.
~?~
It was a chilly January evening, and the Dormouse clutched his coat to his chest, feeling sleep coming on fast. No, I must get to Haigha's house first. They have treacle there. His ear twitched as he rounded the corner that turned to the Hare's abode. He could hear the voices of his two friends drifting through the air. Maybe they're discussing what to get me for my unbirthday. Most thoughts of sleep forgotten, Dormy hid outside the door so he wouldn't be seen and listened to the tea lovers' conversation.
First came the voice of the March Hare: "I don't know, I just get this urge to stick it in my mouth and suck on it."
The Dormouse bit his lip. Excuse me?
Hatta replied, sounding a bit breathless, like he was laughing. "Go ahead. Don't say I didn't warn you, though."
There was a short silence, then some rustling, then Haigha said "It doesn't taste very good." His voice sounded like he had something in his mouth.
"Did you expect it to?" the Hatter let out in slightly broken tones.
The Dormouse considered getting up and finding out what was going on, but something told him he should probably wait a moment.
Another few seconds of silence, then a crash. "Gah!" Haigha shouted. "It's all over my tongue!" Hatta snickered. "Oh, man. I have to swallow it now."
Dormy covered his face with his paws. Oh no…
"That's what you get," the other replied, "when you use your teeth."
The Dormouse could take it no longer, and stormed into the hutch.
"What on Earth is going on he-"
Haigha looked up, the string of a tea bag hanging from his parted lips. "Oh, Dormy!" He pulled the tea bag out of his mouth, wincing as a trail of tea granules falling from a large rip in the side hit his tongue. "We were just, um…"
The Mad Hatter shook his head, chuckling and wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. "Haigha wanted to see what a tea bag tasted like, but it split in is mouth! I told him it would be gross…" He burst in hysterical giggles again.
The March Hare pouted.
The Dormouse facepalmed, then walked to his designated teapot and fell asleep.