Alright, before we start.

This is YAOI. It is also LEMON.
If you find this offensive, click on the back button now. Flamers will simply look like idiots, as I have already warned you.

There are some things that never go together in people's minds. One of these was Chazz Princeton and the rough as hell bar that "Hell Kaiser" Zane found himself in. It took him a while to recognise the younger man, as this wasn't a place that he'd expect to see anyone he knew, and it had been at least five years since he'd seen his former classmate.

But, no, there he was, sitting at the bar, nursing an empty glass as he waited for the sullen barmaid's attention. Finally catching her eye, the dark-haired man ordered, and the barmaid smiled, pulling a bottle off the shelf and pouring a glass of something Zane didn't recognise, but he was pretty sure could moonlight as a paint stripper. The barmaid also poured Chazz something that looked slightly less alcoholic. The stronger drink was downed in almost one go, but the weaker drink Chazz only took a sip of. By the time Zane had made his way over, Chazz had paid and the barmaid was serving a group of worse-for-wear men in suits.

"Not the kind of place I'd expect to find you in." commented Zane, sitting in the stool next to Chazz's.

There was a slight pause.

"I'm struggling to find a reason that makes it any of your business, Kaiser." replied Chazz.

To Zane's surprise, despite the several empty glasses near the other man, his hands were steady as he sipped his drink, and his words were clear when he spoke. Clearly, Chazz was an experienced drinker.

"Looks to me like you can hold your drink." said Zane.

Chazz frowned.

"And again we stray into the 'none of your business' territory." he said, leaning back in his stool. "And anyway, since when were you Mr Social?"

Zane shrugged, waiting for the barmaid to return.

"Drinking alone's boring." he said. "And you looked like the best company here."

Chazz glanced around at the collection of drunkards and half-conscious men and women in the dark room.

"I'll give you that," he said. Seeing Zane failing to get the barmaid's attention, he signalled to her and she hurried over.

"Yes Chazz?" she said.

Zane raised his eyebrow at Chazz but said nothing, instead ordering a drink - nothing as strong as what Chazz was drinking; he couldn't hold his drink as well as the youngest Princeton clearly could. When the barmaid had brought him his order and he had paid, he turned to Chazz.

"You're on first name terms with the staff? How often do you come here?" he asked mockingly.

Chazz shrugged.

"Occasionally. It only a couple of streets away from where I live. And, not that it's any of your business, but Maria," he gestured to the barmaid. "Lives in my building, and that's why she knows my name. And as for you, why are you here, why did you order such a wussy drink, and why do you insist on us having a conversation?"

"You live near here?" said Zane, ignoring Chazz's questions. Chazz shot him an irritated look.

"I won't answer your questions if you just ignore mine." he said. Zane's eyes narrowed, but he complied.

"Fine. I'm here because it looks like somewhere the press will leave me alone, it's not a "wussy" drink, we don't all have your drinking ability, and in all honesty, don't know. Just surprised to see you here."

Chazz leaned forward onto the bar.

"I don't make a habit of drinking alone." he said. "Had a couple of drinks with friends, they had to go, couldn't be bothered to go home. And yeah, I live a couple of blocks away."

"I thought the nearby area was pretty expensive." commented Zane.

Chazz shrugged.

"I'm doing ok. Don't really spend that much money usually; thought I might as well have somewhere decent to live." Clearly this response brought on thoughts he didn't want to deal with, as he took a large swig of his drink straight afterwards.

"The perks of the trust-fund." commented Zane dryly.

"The perks of working 9-5 plus overtime for a sadistic employer." Chazz shot back. "I worked for that place."

"You still working for Aster?"

"Hell no! Packed that in years ago. He's not that bad as a person, but he's a nightmare to work for. Total perfectionist."

"So what do you do now?"

There was a pause.

"I'm a personal assistant."

"A PA? Really?" Zane couldn't help the sneer that crept into his voice. "How many years did you spend at Duel Academy to become some suit's PA?"

"I'm Kaiba's personal assistant." There was victory in Chazz voice as Zane's expression changed. "So not quite "some suit" as you put it."

"Isn't Kaiba supposed to be a nightmare to work for?"

"I never said he wasn't. As much as I hate to admit it, working for Aster did have one large benefit: it taught me how to work with sadistic, egomaniacal employers with almost impossibly high standards and a fondness for mind-games. Untill I started, none of Kaiba's PAs had lasted more than three months. Now, he needs me, because he knows how long he'd have to look for another PA that can handle the job."

"Well," said Zane. "That explains the drinking problem."

Chazz's now empty glass was put down with an ominous thud.

"Excuse me?" said Chazz softly, his eyes promising the other man lots and lots of pain. "I do not have a drinking problem!"

Zane gestured at the glasses by Chazz's part of the bar.

"Not all mine, not all alcohol." hissed Chazz. "I'm not an alcoholic. And I don't have to sit here and listen to you call me one." He got up to go. "Thanks for the memories, Kaiser." With that, he left.

Not many people realise that Zane was still in possession of a conscience. It was small and rarely used, but it was there. And it was bugging the hell out of him over his last comment to Chazz. With a growl of frustration, he got up to follow the younger man out.

It wasn't hard to find Chazz, who had stopped only a little way up the road from the bar. When Zane reached him, he saw why. Chazz had a cigarette in his mouth and was trying to get the other end to light using a beaten up lighter.

"Come on, you stupid, lousy…" he was muttering as, once again, the lighter refused to co-operate.

Seizing his chance, Zane found his own lighter, sparking it instantly.

"Here." he said, holding it to the end of the cigarette. They were both silent as it lit, and Chazz took a drag. "Those things will kill you." Zane commented when he reasoned that the nicotine had been given a chance to sweeten Chazz's mood slightly.

"Hypocrite." replied Chazz, nodding at Zane's lighter. "And anyway, this from the guy who gave himself a heart condition?"

It was a cheap shot, but Zane still took it, wincing slightly at memories from his lowest moments. Chazz softened the blow by offering Zane a drag from the cigarette, which he took. Summoning all the effects of the nicotine and alcohol, Zane turned to Chazz, handing back the cigarette.

"Uh, about the drinking problem comment," he started. "I shouldn't have said it." That was the nearest Chazz would get to a spoken apology, and they both knew it.

"You shouldn't have." agreed Chazz. That was the closest Zane would get to a spoken forgiveness, and they both knew that too.

There was a pause.

"You hungry?" asked Zane, suddenly, breaking the silence unexpectedly.

"Kinda." said Chazz. "Why?"

"I'll buy you dinner; call it a peace offering." said Zane.

Now, Chazz was doing pretty well now, but two years in the Slifer Dorms and hard times when he had only just graduated had taught him never to turn down a free meal.

"Ok." said Chazz.

Zane nodded, holding out his hand to hail a taxi.

"I know a good place that stays open late." he said as a taxi cab pulled up. "Get in."

The restaurant Zane had meant was good. They'd eaten and talked, but by silent agreement didn't order anymore alcohol. The problem had started when they were leaving: the press.

"Hell Kaiser!"

"Hey, over here!"

"What's your name, gorgeous?" This was directed at Chazz.

"You two together?"

"Hell Kaiser's Sweetheart! This'll be great in tomorrow's paper!"

Chazz and Zane exchanged glances, before ducking back into the restaurant.

"This is why I took the job as Kaiba's PA." said Chazz, glancing out of the window at the gathered paparazzi. "The press ignore the minions."

The restaurant owner came over.

"I called a taxi for you." he said. "It's waiting around the back."

Chazz nodded gratefully, pressing several notes into the man's hand.

"We owe you big time." he said.

The two hurried around the back, getting into the taxi before the press could catch wind. Unfortunately, the taxi had to go past the crowd of photographers to get onto the main road. As the paparazzi tried to surround the car, Chazz signalled to the taxi driver.

"I'll give you 20000 yen (1) for every photographer you hit." he promised him. The driver laughed, skilfully swerving to avoid the crowd.

Zane caught Chazz's attention.

"You got work tomorrow?" he asked.

Chazz shook his head.

"I don't work weekends. You think I can afford to come into work hungover?"

Zane shrugged.

"You said Kaiba's a sadistic guy."

"Overtime pay doubles at the weekend. He discourages working at the weekends as a result."

"Ah."

"Trust me, I wouldn't spent Friday night drinking if I was working Saturday. The guy's like a bloodhound - he can tell if someone's been drinking."

"My point is, the press is probably going to follow us. If you want you can hide at mine tonight."

"Won't that make things worse?"

"Believe me, the press are a lot less fun when you're on your own. They take great pleasure in misquoting you, and if you're alone, there's no-one to prove that you really didn't say what they claim you did. Besides, do you really want them to know where you live?"

"You make a good argument. Your place it is."

Due to their driver, who clearly had experience with the press, they made it to Zane's block of flats before any of their pursuers, and the taxi stopped as close to the building as possible. The building in question was a huge, expensive looking block of flats with a lobby on the ground floor. Zane stopped to speak with the security team behind a counter by the door.

"Don't let anyone up here tonight." he ordered. "Especially not the press."

The team all nodded. Chazz spotted the first cars beginning to pull up.

"Zane…" he said, as a warning.

Spotting them too, Zane called the lift, which opened almost instantly.

When the doors shut and Zane had pressed the button marked "Penthouse", Chazz turned to him, one eyebrow raised.

"And you said I was living expensively?" he said.

Looking back, neither Chazz nor Zane can remember exactly who kissed who first. One second they were sitting sharing another of Chazz's cigarettes, the next they were face to face, very close, almost touching. Finally, one of them made the connection.

Zane was dominating the kiss, his tongue in Chazz's mouth, and one hand on the other man's thigh.

Finally, they broke apart for air.

"Looks like the paparazzi were right." said Zane.

"We don't need to let them know that." replied Chazz.

The kissed again, and this time Zane was unbuttoning Chazz's shirt, pulling it off of his shoulders, sucking at his neck. Chazz moaned, pulling off Zane's jumper (their coats had been discarded when they entered the penthouse). They separated so that Zane could pull the jumper over his head, then came together again. Zane lifted Chazz so that he was straddling his lap. Grinning wickedly, Chazz rolled his hips, grinding himself against Zane. They both moaned. Zane went back to marking Chazz's neck. As he did so, he began to unbutton the other man's jeans. Getting them open, he pulled the down as far as their current position allowed.

"Lift your hips." he murmured.

Resting his hands on Zane's shoulders to brace himself, Chazz did as he was asked. Zane pulled off his jeans, but their current position meant that a rather sensitive part of Chazz's body was now in Zane's line of sight. Smirking, Zane gripped Chazz's hips.

"What are you -" Chazz began, but he was cut off when Zane kissed him through his boxers. "Zane!" he cried. Enjoying the noises Chazz was making, Zane flipped them so that Chazz was underneath him. He then continued to torment Chazz, now kissing, licking and nipping at his inner thighs, deliberately avoiding the area Chazz most wanting him to pay attention to.

"Zane!" moaned Chazz. "Stop teasing - ah!" He gave another cry of surprise when Zane pulled his boxers down and started to finally pay attention to where Chazz needed him to.

Chazz was chanting his name steadily now. He felt the younger man stiffen, arching his back, and pulled away just in time, as the other came.

Chazz caught his breath as quickly as he could. Fortunately, Zane waited, but it was clear that the older man was aroused. When his breathing was back to normal, Chazz kissed him, smiling when the other man deepened the kiss.

"Bedroom?" Chazz suggested.

Zane nodded, taking his hand and leading him in. They kissed again almost instantly, then Chazz started to undo own Zane's jeans. When he had them undone, Zane stepped out of them, pushing Chazz down onto the bed. Chazz shifted slightly.

"Lube?" he asked quietly. Zane nodded.

"Give me a second." he murmured, getting up.

Shifting through a drawer, he soon found what he was looking for - a large, almost completely full bottle of lotion. Chazz sat up to look at it.

"Why-?" he began.

"Atticus." Zane replied instantly. "He thinks it's funny to send me things like this."

Knowing Atticus's perverted sense of humour (and having received several "gifts" of his own), this explained everything.

"At least I'm not the only one." muttered Chazz. "He seems to think I'm a masochist."

"Aren't you?" said Zane, licking one of the marks he'd made on Chazz's neck before biting down on it, not hard enough to break the skin, but hard enough to make the mark even more pronounced. Chazz responded by moaning, lifting his head subconsciously to give Zane more access.

Spreading Chazz's legs and positioning himself between them, Zane spread lubricant over his fingers before starting to prepare Chazz.

Chazz was no where near a virgin, but it'd been a while so the sensation made him jump. Closing his eyes, he tried to relax as much as possible. Zane helped by continuing to suck on his neck. Curling his fingers, he searched for Chazz's prostate. Finally, he found the right angle and his fingers brushed it.

"AH! Zane!" said Chazz, writhing and making it very difficult for Zane to concentrate. Pulling out his fingers carefully, he positioned himself, slowly entering the other man.

"I'm not made of glass, Zane!" protested Chazz. "Harder, come on!"

Zane was only too happy to oblige, pulling out, then slamming into Chazz. The feeling made them both cry out.

Chazz wrapped his legs around Zane's waist as the other man's mouth met his. It only took a few more thrusts before he came again, Zane following soon after. Pulling out of him, Zane rolled over to collapse next to him.

"Holy…" breathed Chazz, when he stopped panting and could think straight again. "I never thought I'd be glad about the press."

Zane laughed briefly.

"Me neither." he said.

Pulling the top sheet off of the bed and throwing it to the floor, Zane pulled Chazz closer to him.

"Never saw you as the kind to cuddle after sex." said Chazz, but he belied the jibe by shifting closer to Zane.

"Not with most." Zane admitted, his arm resting around Chazz's waist.

"Not to ruin the moment, but what is this?" asked Chazz. "A one time thing we can blame on the alcohol, or something to happen again?"

"Oh, I definitely think that this is something to do again, don't you?" asked Zane, kissing Chazz's shoulder. Chazz laughed.

"Yeah, I think so."

Chazz woke up the next morning to the sound of his phone. Cursing, he silently got up, glancing back at his bed-partner ("lover" sounded way too much like something out of a bad romance novel). Realising that most of his own clothes were still strewn around the living room, Chazz grabbed one of Zane's shirts from the wardrobe, putting it on hurriedly as he tried to remember where he'd left his phone while his head gave a protest about the amount of alcohol he'd consumed the night before. Finally locating his phone, Chazz groaned at the name flashing on the screen. Aster. He flipped open his phone.

"Hello?" he asked, wincing at how his throat grated as he spoke.

"Finally!" said Aster, exasperated. "Have you any idea how long I've been trying to call you?"

"Uh… Aster? Why are you trying to call me? I didn't even realise you had this number."

"I called in a favour when you wouldn't answer the phone in your apartment!"

"Yeah, I'm… not exactly there…"

"Oh, I know that now! You're curled up all lovey dovey with Hell Kaiser Zane!"

Chazz's eyes widened in horror.

"How the hell do you know that?"

"Oh good god, it's true?!"

"Of course it's true, I thought we'd already established that!"

"You're sleeping with Zane?"

"Why is that so hard to take in? Actually, scratch that. I slept with him last night. I haven't been sleeping with him, as you put it. Hold on, back to my question - how do you know that?"

"Because, Chazz, it's in the papers and on all the gossip programs!"

"You watch those?"

"No! Well, yes, but that's not the point."

"Oh god…"

"So what was it, a drunken mistake?"

"I don't get drunk, remember? Not in the way most people do. And anyway, what makes you think it was a mistake?"

"Uh, the fact that it's Zane?"

"It wasn't a mistake, and the only regrets I have are that I'm now being stalked by the paparazzi. That and Kaiba's probably going to kill me."

"Not you, just the press."

"How do you know that?"

"He called me. I would just like to mention how that one killed me: Seto Kaiba calls me and it's to ask if I know where you are."

"Oh god… have they connected me with Kaiba?"

"You're kidding, right? They don't even know who you are! You're just Hell Kaiser's mystery partner." Chazz looked upwards and gave thanks to every deity he could think of. "They're offering a reward for information, actually. Name, address, embarrassing baby photos…"

"That buys me some time then. You're sure Kaiba won't kill me?"

"Certain, but I'd make him the next person you call."

"Noted. Thanks for the heads up, by the way."

"Hmm… I figured I owed you that at least."

"I owe you."

"You can buy me lunch and tell me everything at some point this week."

Chazz rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Deal. You are such a girl."

He hung up, took a deep breath and then dialled the number that would connect him to his employer.

"Hello?" came the response once the phone connected.

"Aster told me you wanted to speak with me?" said Chazz, holding the phone slightly away from his ear in cause something ignited Kaiba's temper.

"Have you seen the papers yet?"

"I dare not leave the apartment."

"Hell Kaiser's apartment?" Unless Chazz was mistaken, there was amusement in Kaiba's voice.

"How many messages should I expect when I get home?"

"Just a couple from me. Anyone else… I can't say. You know that they don't know who you are, right?"

"Yeah, Aster said. Is this going to reflect badly on KaibaCorp?"

"It shouldn't… just be careful what you say and do. Although, when it does come out that you work for me, it should make it all die down."

"Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and go well with ketchup."

"Exactly. Anyone with even the slightest bit of enjoyment of life won't dare mess with someone so closely connected to me."

"Glad to hear it. Thanks. I'll see you on Monday."

Kaiba hung up without comment, as per usual. Chazz began to scroll through his missed calls… there were a lot. Jaden, Syrus, Atticus, Alexis, Slade, Jagger…

"Great…" he muttered, then gave a yelp of surprise when a pair of arms wrapped around his waist.

"I was starting to think you'd left." said Zane.

"Heh, it's not that easy to get rid of me." Chazz replied.

"I like the new look." Zane said, referring to the stolen shirt, which was far too big for Chazz, but did a good job of keeping him decent.

"Yeah, well, I'm still trying to work out exactly where my own things are." shot back Chazz jokingly, noting that Zane was dressed.

Zane turned him around slowly, then kissed him.

"I thought you'd left when I woke up and you were gone." he admitted.

Chazz smirked at he walked back to the living room to look for his clothes. Finding his own shirt, he placed it over the arm of the sofa, then crouched down to locate his jeans. Finally finding everything, he smiled at Zane.

"Uh, just give me a second…" he said, walking towards the bedroom. He didn't realise that Zane had followed him until he was suddenly tackled to the bed. Laughing, Chazz squirmed as Zane pinned him.

"It's a bit late to be getting shy now, isn't it?" said Zane, one hand wandering while the other helped Chazz out of the shirt.

Chazz gasped as Zane teased him.

"I thought you - ah! - be a lot less interested in watching me get dressed than undressed!" he replied breathlessly.

Zane smirked.

"Well, if you want, I could leave you alone to get dressed…" he offered sadistically.

With a growl, Chazz pulled him closer so that they could kiss again.

"Well…" said Chazz, deciding to play the older man at his own game. "I could use a shower… and that's always so much more fun between two people…"

"Hmm?" said Zane, clearly interested.

"But," Chazz continued, "You're already dressed, so I guess I'll be on my own then. Wouldn't want to inconvenience you…"

Thanks to working with Kaiba, Chazz was very good at both mind games and manipulation. It was very useful at times like this.

"Oh, I think I can bring myself to join you…" murmured Zane sarcastically.

Laughing, Chazz walked to the door of the bathroom before turning back.

"Shall we?" he said.

Laughing, the two went into the bathroom.

It was over an hour before they came out again.

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