Out of the Night

Chapter 1

Aaron had been out on a run, training for the charity race being held in memory of Katy Sugden. He was knackered, exhausted to be exact, every part of him ached, and his lungs burned with his efforts to go ever faster, ever further.

It was late, nearly midnight, the night cool but not unpleasantly so. Aaron had been on his way home and as he'd neared the village cemetery he'd felt drawn there, and had let his feet carry him in through it's open gates. A full moon hovered above him lighting his way, giving his surroundings an eerie glow. The cemetery, like the village, was deserted at this time of night, except for the dead of course and he had no fear of them. As far as he was concerned they lay in eternal sleep, were mercifully free of the woes life contained.

Aaron panted breathlessly as he stood and stared at a headstone, at the name engraved there. He hadn't been here since first coming back to Emmerdale, he felt a bit guilty about that but, well he was here now wasn't he. He had never forgotten Jackson and never would, he had long since accepted he was at peace, and so had let go of the guilt he had felt for the part he had played in his death. Now he carried another such burden, this too was eating him up inside, casting the darkest of shadows over his life. The only hope of getting through it, the reason he kept going... Robert. Right or wrong he loved him.

Their affair remained top secret, his mum and Paddy thought it over and he hated lying to them but it was the only way. He would have liked to tell Paddy, to confide him, let him know just how happy being with Robert made him. Paddy would never accept Robert though, he didn't like him, he didn't trust him and he hated the way he'd treated him. Paddy had said he was just his bit on the side, that he would never be anything more and that he deserved better, he'd been so relieved to hear he'd ended things with Robert, no way could he tell him it was back on. But he needed to talk to someone, he needed to air his troubled thoughts. He could tell Jackson couldn't he? Aaron knew Jackson wouldn't hear him but was suddenly certain that opening his heart here, at his resting place, would help him in some way.

"I know you wouldn't approve, that you'd have plenty to say about what I'm doing, none of it what I'd want to hear. But I just want to be with him Jackson, is that so wrong? I love him, like I loved you. Losing you... I don't want to hurt like that ever again and I would if what I have with him ended for good.

"He's nothing like you, not in anyway. I know you wouldn't like him, that you, like my mum and Paddy would warn me off him if you could. They think he's using me but he's not, he cares about me and in time he'll realise the only way he'll ever be truly happy is with me. I know one day Robert will want what I want, that he'll turn his back on the life he has now and make a life with me. I just have to wait it out and..." Aaron sighed despondently, that time seemed such a long way off, he looked thoughtfully at Jackson's headstone saying, "I just wish wishes came true."

Turning around he made his way towards the gate, stopping and turning swiftly around on sensing someone was now behind him. To his relief there was nobody there but a little spooked he broke into a run, heading home and to his empty bed.

... ...

"Robert"

Robert stirred, the soft male voice rousing him from the realms of sleep.

"Robert" The voice came again a little louder and more insistent this time.

Robert's eyes flickered open finding his room bathed in the milky light of the moon. He was instantly aware of someone lying next to him. and for one blissful second he believed it was Aaron sharing his bed, his heart sank on realising it was Chrissie. Disappointment quickly turned to curiosity, hadn't he heard a voice? Hadn't someone been calling him, deliberately waking him? He was sure he had heard a voice, a male voice. Chrissie obviously hadn't, she was fast asleep, her soft, rhythmic breathing told him that. Looking around their room he told himself he'd been dreaming then rolled onto his side, purposefully turning his back on his wife. He loved her but not in the way he should and the more time he spent with Aaron the less he wanted to spend with her. Chrissie just didn't thrill or excite him the way Aaron did, there was just no fire between them, no bone melting heat when their flesh met and melded. He had experienced real passion with Aaron and he craved it, needed it like he needed his next breath. What had begun as a bit of fun, a dangerous game of kiss and not tell, had now become something deeper, something he never thought he could have with another man. Still it wasn't something he could ever share with the world, he had too much to lose should Chrissie ever find out.

Physically aching for Aaron now he snuggled further into his pillow, willing sleep to rescue him from his thoughts. The house was still, silent, cloaked in the colours of night and as he lay amidst the warmth and comfort he began to relax, but as consciousness started to lose its grip on him the voice came again...

"Robert!"

It was louder, demanding in tone and had Robert sit upright and lean over to switch on his bedside light before hurriedly scanning the room. He had expected to find someone there, some stranger, someone who had no right being there, but apart from him and Chrissie the room was empty. He began to shiver, not because he'd been left unnerved by the experience but because the room suddenly felt icy cold, like someone had left the window open on a winters day. Pulling the duvet up around him he glanced at the alarm clock that Chrissie kept on her side of the bed. 1am! It was way too early to be getting up but Robert knew he wouldn't go back to sleep now and decided to go downstairs and make himself a hot drink, he'd check on the heating too, the bedroom had turned into an icebox! Getting out of bed he hurriedly pulled on the dressing gown Chrissie had bought him, he didn't particularly like it, but wearing it made her happy and right now he was in need of it. As he neared the bedroom door he got the feeling he was being watched, he turned to look at Chrissie believing he'd woken her up, but found his wife was still asleep. A chill ran up and down his spine, he felt really uneasy but didn't know why and decided he was in need of something stronger than tea, whisky and a large one at that!

TBC