Misunderstood Love
Angel: no I don't have an obsession what are you talking about?! . .
Jesse: no one said anything…
Jaden: doesn't mean we aren't thinking it!
Jesse and Jaden: YOU HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH SPIRITSHIPPING!!
Angel: …..XD sssssssooooooo? Its beyond cute!
Jesse: but what you write for this is evil!
Angel: so?
Jaden: it usually involves hurting me!
Angel: so?
Both: …I hate you
SPIRITSHIPPING!!
Jaden's POV
What is this feeling that I've had since the moment I meet him? I thought it was a yearning to be his friend, but I still have that feeling even though I spend most of my day with him. Is it that I care deeply for him? Yes….but it's deeper than that. Much deeper…
When I'm with him, the rest of the world seems to disappear and all I see is him. When I'm not with him all I can think about is being with him, or I'm missing him more than I should. When I think he's in pain, my whole being wants me to do everything in my power to make him feel better again. When I see those sparklingly emerald eyes, or that dazzling smile of his, I feel like I'm under his spell.
I've never had feelings so strong as these before. Not even for dueling if you can believe it! So I have no idea what to call this feeling…
I'd been wondering what to call this feeling for a while now. Almost since I've meet him. But a few days ago I finally found out what this feeling was. It was…
Love
I was in love with Jesse Anderson. It had taken a great deal of thinking for me to finally figure it out. When I wasn't in school or eating, I was off somewhere, thinking about this feeling that's been in the pit of my stomach. I feel bad for ignoring the others, but I just had to get this feeling defined. But now that I do have it all figured out there is still one thing I need to do:
Decide if I should tell him or not.
I don't want him to hate me for loving him. I could take it if he didn't return my feelings to a point, but if he hated me I might just die. That's the one thing holding me back from telling him my feelings. I just wish I knew how he felt! That would make this BEYOND easier!
Kuri!
Huh? Winged Kuriboh? That you partner?
Kuri! He chirped happily, as he appeared in front of me. I smiled. He always knew what to say. KURI!!
"So you're saying that you want me to put my heart one the line and tell Jesse how I feel about him before I loose him completely?" I asked him. He nodded and I sighed. "It won't be easy that's a fact…" I said as I looked out the window in my room. The sun was setting. It gave my room a nice yellow glow. It gave you a nice calming feeling.
BANG! BANG!
Calming feeling gone. I get up and walk over to see who's at the door. I open it and surprise surprise! It's the man of the hour! Jesse Anderson! I almost go to glare at Kuriboh, knowing that he had planned something.
"You gonna let me in partner?" he asked in that musical voice of his. I wanted to say he could come in but my mouth didn't seem to be working right, so I just nodded and moved out of the way. He smiled at me. I blushed and closed the door.
"So what's up bro?" I ask as I turn around with a big smile on my face. That smile instantly vanishes once I see him looking down at his fidgeting hands. Nervous?! Jesse Anderson gets nervous?! This is new…. "You ok Jess?" I ask cocking my head to the side. He slowly nodded. "You sure…?" he nodded again. Well, he'll tell me when he's ready. I took a deep breath.
I was going to confess to him right here and now!
"I gotta talk to you about something!" Jesse and I said. Wait…WE BOTH SAID IT?! "Huh?" we looked at each other with confused looks on our faces.
"Uh you can go first Jess!" I say smiling at him. "Mine can wait!" o ya that's totally true.
"Well if you insist…" Jesse said looking off to the side. His bangs covered his eyes so I couldn't see those beautiful emerald eyes of his. "I've been meaning to ask you this for a few days…" I don't really like where this is going. "Jaden…are you mad at me?"
Hold up! Where did that come from!?
"I mean do you hate me or anything? You seem like you've been avoiding me the past few days…every chance you get you try and spend it alone. And you couldn't look at me or anything and it just got me thinking that you hated me or something…" he started shaking a little bit. "So...do you hate me?!" he almost shouted finally looking up at me with his eyes brimming with tears. I could feel my eyes widen. He was really hurting from this, wasn't he? "Well?!" he asked in a more urgent voice. I offer him a warm smile.
"Of course I don't hate you Jesse!" he got a look of relief in his eyes though his face still looked urgent. He wanted a reason for me ignoring him. Damn. "You see I was trying to figure something out and I wanted to be alone so that I could think about it! I had nothing to do with you doing anything that would make me hate you!" more like love you…
Jesse wiped away his hardly shed tears with his sleeve and looked me right in the eye. Like he was trying to look into my soul to see if I was lying. He obviously didn't find anything as he let his shoulders slump and a smile creep onto his face.
"Well that was worth the whole few days I put into thinkin' that!" he said with a chuckle. I chuckled too. Same old Jesse. "Sorry to get all emotional on ya there Jay!"
"It's ok Jess!" I responded, my smile growing again. "You know you can tell me anything!"
"Well…there was another reason I came down here today…" the smile I had faded once again and looked at him, utterly confused. "I wanted to tell you something else…and this one might make you hate me. But I'm gonna take that risk!"
"I thought I made it clear that I could never hate you Jess!" what could he say that would make me hate him? "Now come on! Tell me already! What is it?!" I asked getting impatient. I half expected him to laugh at what I had just said, but instead he looked off to the side again for a few moments.
"Jay…I…I…" he looked me right in the eye this time. "I want to be more than friends with you!" he said rather loudly. I took a step back. My face becoming twisted into one of confusion and almost horror.
"W-what?!" I said staring at him. He continued to look at me with those big emerald eyes.
"Jaden I…I like you. A lot! In fact I….I love you!" Jesse exclaimed. My mind shut off. I had wanted to hear him say those words to me but…something in me told me it wasn't true. That he didn't mean it. I got mad. I looked down at the ground and could just tell that my eyes were covered by my bangs so Jesse couldn't see them. I clenched my hands into fists and started shaking a little bit. "Jaden? Are you ok?" I couldn't take it anymore.
I punched him.
He took a few steps back and ended up on my bed. He gave me a look of confusion and utter shock. I glared at him.
"J-Jay?" he stuttered out, his hand going to the cheek that I just punched. It took all I had not to punch him again.
"SHUT UP!" I yelled at him. "DO YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY TO PLAY WITH PEOPLES FEELINGS LIKE THAT?!" I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I won't cry. I can't cry. Not in front of him. "DO YOU ENJOY CAUSING PEOPLE PAIN LIKE THIS?! YOU ASS HOLE! I HATE YOU!!" I ran out of my room. I jumped over the railing and ran for the forest, finally letting the tears fall from my eyes.
"JADEN!" I heard Jesse call out after me. I ignored him and just kept running. I didn't want to see him.
I kept running till I got to a cliff that was deep in the forest and just sat down about 5 feet from the edge. I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I rested my chin on them as I stared out to the sea with tear-filled eyes.
"H-how could he do this to me?!" I said just above a whisper in a shaky voice. "He must have been able to at least tell that I liked him more than a friend! I know I made it obvious I liked him like that at least a little bit! So how could he go and say something like that?! And he said it in an almost casual way! He couldn't be serious! He just couldn't!" I then sobbed into my knees. It hurt so much. Why did he have to do that? "Why did he havta hurt me so…?"
"Whelp I didn't mean ta hurt ya there Jay!" That voice! I felt an arm wrap around my shoulder and a body lean against mine. My eyes widened but I kept my head on my knees. I couldn't look at him. "That's the last thing I want to do. And I'm sorry if it sounded causal! That took me a hell of a lot of courage to do! And I meant every word of it! I do love you Jaden! With all my heart!"
…I'M SUCH AN IDIOT!! I should have known that Jesse wasn't the type of person to do something like that! He really was just saying that he loved me! I can't believe I punched him and told him I hate him! I'm so horrible!! I let go of my legs and grabbed onto the front of his blazer with all my strength. I buried my head in his chest.
"I'M SO SORRY JESSE!!" I exclaimed into his chest. I felt his strong arms wrap around me in a comforting hug. "I DIDN'T MEAN WHAT I SAID! I REALLY DIDN'T! I DON'T HATE YOU! I LOVE YOU TOO!" I let go of his blazer and wrap my arms around his back, trying to get as close to him as I could. "Please don't be mad at me for hitting you!" I heard him chuckle.
"I'm not mad Jay!" he said. "I understand why you were mad! I just didn't expect you to punch me like that…"
"I'm sorry..." I said, snuggled up to him more.
"For the last time its fine Jay!" he put his chin on top of my head and started to rub circles into my back. "I told you I understand and I'm not mad! So there's no need to say you're sorry!"
"M'k" I mumbled. I closed my eyes as I rested against him. We just sat there. Just like that for who knows how long? It was very relaxing, sitting there in Jesse's strong and comforting embrace.
"Jaden?" I heard him finally say after what seemed like an entirety.
"Hm?" I ask, not opening my eyes.
"Wanna go back to the dorms or stay here a little longer?" he asked. I didn't move.
"Stay here…" I said sound sleepy. I couldn't help it. When I was with Jesse all I could do was relax. And just sitting here was making me fall asleep. It would seem that he noticed that tone in my voice and chuckled slightly.
"You falling asleep Jay?" he asked. I shock my head slowly. "Liar! Come on! I'll stay with you tonight!" he took his chin off my head and unwrapped his arms around my body. I let my arms fall limp by his waist. "Jay?" I was to tired to respond. He chuckled again. "Fine! Guess I'll carry you!" I felt myself being picked up. It felt like I was floating.
Next thing I knew I was being placed on something soft, and yet hard at the same time. I feel the ground shift slightly and I can feel the warmth of something. Then something light was pulled over me to my neck.
"Comfy Jay?" I hear Jesse ask me just above a whisper. O. We must be in my bed in the Slifer dorms. I moved closer to Jesse and put my head by his chest. I could hear his heart beating. It was lulling me more into a deep sleep. He wrapped an arm around me. "I'll take that as a yes." He said as he chuckled. "I love you Jaden Yuki!"
"I love you too…Jesse….Anderson…" I said. I felt him kiss the top of my head as I fell into a deep sleep with the one I love holding me.
THE END!!
Angel: what is it with me and writing the smucking angst nowadays?! Grness!
Jaden: don't take it out on us!
Jesse: ya don't!
Angel: I wasn't!
REVIEW IF YOU LIKED!! BUT DON'T FLAME OR I WILL FLAME BACK!! Cookies if you review!! -Angel
