Disclaimer: Repetition tells me I own neither Criminal Minds nor the song used
A/N: This is the third piece that leads on from "Talking To The Moon" and "Voices In My Head"
Song lyrics taken from Stan Walker – I Choose You
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- I Choose To Love You -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Derek defied the voice in his head.
He stood up in the dark room, pumped his chest out, settled his nerves and grabbed his clothes.
He was done fighting this; it'd kill him in the end. It would only grow in magnitude, pick up momentum until the moment it was too late and his heart would just pull from his chest in a death grip and land on the floor in pieces.
A place where it would stay until he truly died.
He couldn't let himself be the victim of love, not like that, not when he really had a chance.
After all Penelope was everything he needed. Everything he ever wanted. Everything that would keep him alive until his very last day on this earth.
He couldn't waste what he could have.
So he wanted it, at long last the doubting voice in his head was losing and it was going to stay that way for the rest of his life.
I will choose to love you, yeahhh
Though it may be easier to walk away
I will choose to stay & love you
Penelope beckoned the answer of the moon for the last time that night. Her mind was decided by the twinkles of the stars surrounding it. She was done procrastinating, she was finished searching for the answers, she was spent on hope.
All she had now was a motive and actions.
She picked herself up off of the bed, dithered a bit in the moonlight trying to decide what was best to wear. She wandered her small apartment, wringing her hands, checking her appearance, making sure she was truly ready for this.
She decided if she stayed in her apartment anymore she would never get what she wanted, what she longed for.
Grabbing her keys she reached for her door, but froze.
Breathe, she told herself and then looked at the doorframe.
"You love him; you cannot deny yourself what you deserve any longer."
And on that note she pulled her door opened and fled the restraints of her apartment.
Love is just so beautiful
But sometimes it takes work
And the ones you love
At times can leave you so hurt
Derek heard the slam of a door and froze. He looked up the stairs, his heart began to race, his eyes watching the top of the stairway.
As he saw her he realised he didn't have a tirade of words to say, his didn't have a love speech made, he didn't even have more than three words. He was just thankful he knew those three most important words ready to speak.
Penelope looked up as her foot hit the first step and she froze, her hand went to railing to steady herself.
She was out of time. Derek was there. She didn't have the car journey to decide on her few choice words; she didn't have time to settle her stomach from its vaulting. She had the here and now.
"What are you doing here?" Penelope asked, her tone coming out slightly panicky. Why would Derek Morgan be at her place in the middle of the night when they only had a few more hours of shut eye before the work day begun?
She didn't want to get hopeful. So she allowed her mind to believe something terrible had happened to protect herself.
"I could ask you the same thing, Baby Girl." Derek said as he remained standing there. "Why are you out?"
"I believe I asked first, Handsome." Penelope responded with a small smile, neither of them moving, both calming in the others company.
"I..." Derek's hand ran over his head, "I needed to see you."
"Oh..."
"So why are you leaving in the middle of the night." Derek finally asked her.
Moment of truth hit. "I needed to see you too."
I will choose to love you, yeahhh
I will choose to stay
I choose you, I choose you, yeahhh
I choose youuu
I choose you everyday
I choose you
Penelope had finally moved and with it drawn Derek into her apartment. Wordlessly they both sat down and looked at the other. Derek noticed Penelope had been awake all night and Penelope had noticed Derek had been too.
"What's up?" Penelope asked Derek quietly as she hugged a large cushion to her chest. "Something's bothering you, I can tell."
"You are." Derek responded instantly. "I've sat awake all night, pacing my house and it's all about you, Baby Girl." Derek told her truthfully. "This isn't easy for me to say..."
"I'm sure you're not alone." Penelope added briefly.
"I hope I'm not." Derek moved closer then, he grabbed Penelope's hand and pulled her closer to him.
Penelope tensed up slightly, making Derek lose his train of thought. "I... I mean... damn it." Derek said and just removed his hands from Penelope's and placed them around her face, pulling her close to him, before he allowed his lips to touch her.
He felt the softness of her lips, the smoothness as she kissed him back. The way she kissed him was fluid and easy. Penelope placed her hands to Derek's face, running them around to his neck, deepening what he started.
Penelope felt her every wish come true. She felt the love she'd stored away in her taken heart explode and blossom. She didn't want this to end and, strangely, neither did Derek. He kept on kissing her, allowing his hands to move off of her face and down her curvaceous body, pulling her closer and closer to his wanted body.
When the moment happened and the kiss ended, they parted and looked at one another longingly. Derek watched Penelope lick her plump bruised with a kiss lips. Penelope watched Derek take in the moment, soak it up, keeping her close to him.
"Wow," was all Penelope could say in the eve of moment.
"I love you Penelope Garcia, and I'm done waiting around thinking I'm not what you want because you're what I want."
"I do want you." Penelope said her lips curving into a smile. "I've loved you for too long and lately you've been driving me insane and Derek, don't ever think I don't want you."
"You chose Kevin though." Derek told her, his heart clenching on the words.
Penelope's breath stopped there, she looked down, away from the hurt expression Derek's face had captured, she didn't realise she was crying until he wiped one of the tears away. "I'm sorry; I never meant to make you feel like that, Derek. I just never thought you wanted me, not with the girls you get."
"Seems we've both made the other doubt." Derek grabbed Penelope's hand, his other hand going to lift her face to look at him. "I'm done waiting, Penelope; I want you now, not tomorrow or next week. If I wait any longer I'm only going to lose you. I choose to love you now."
"Don't wait then. I choose you too." Penelope responded and this time she instigated the new kiss.
Now there was no withholding, there was no doubt.
It was just pure passion and built up lust that was pouring out.
Some people think that love is just a feeling
So they fall out of love as quickly as they fell in
Some people think that love is just a game
But they the ones who always seem to end up getting played
Though everything around might change
One thing will still remain
I will choose to love you, yeahhh
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- I Choose To Love You -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
A/N: One just before I head off to work! I finish late tonight, so we'll see what updates will happen =)
Hope you enjoyed that!
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