Hi all my name is Rose. this is my first story so reviews would really be appreciated. the title of this story means 1 cut to many in Japanese (or so google translater told me).

SUMMARY: Naruto is a 12 year old boy. on a ninja team and has fended for himself since he was young. surviving the world as a demon gets very hard at time so the way Naruto coops is by cutting. but what happens when the voices in his head that have only recently appeared send him over the edge. that 1 cut, the cut he should have never made gets him court by none other then Sasuke and his sensei Kakashi?

DSSCLAIMER: as sad as it is a do not own naruto at all:(

there is a poem at the end of the story that i wrote so that is the only thing that i own.

Hope you enjoy my first story, and tips would be lovley as i am only new to this thing. ALSO how do i get a beta to check my work i would really like the help of one.

1 Katto futatsu no ō

I'm one person. A 12 year old boy, living on my own in a run down apartment. I was rapped at least 5 times between the age of 6 and 8. people try and kill me, some like to torture me. Others just like to yell at me, call me names or hit me. If I want cloths I have to get what I'm given or what ever I can find in the streets or bins. If I need food I get what's cheapest in shops and even then I get charged extra.

I'm a ninja, on a team with Sakura, Sasuke and our sensei Kakashi. We get missions at least once a week if not more. When I get paid I go strait to shops and buy food. Some times, depends who's working, they wont even let me buy food.

Sometimes I get home from missions and find my apartment broken into, windows smashed or stuff stolen.

You are all probably wondering why I get treated so badly. Well it all started twelve years ago. When I was born the fourth hokage sealed the kyuubi inside of me saving the village,but sadly killing himself. Since I could walk I have been on my own, left to fend for myself against the danger of the world.

Most days I train the sorrow away of being so lonely other days when the pain gets so hard to bare I cut. I cut my arms and wrists to take the pain away. The kyuubi tries to fix it but I refuse and tell him leave it for the major shit.

right now it is 6 o'clock and I'm due to training at 7 so I decide I might as well do some cutting, maybe then I wont be able to feel the pain when Sasuke abuses me, or when Sakura tell me to shut up and that I'm annoying.

I walk to my bathroom grabbing a Kunai as I walk past my table. I turn the water on in the sink and put my arm under. Grabbing the Kunai tightly in my hand I place it on my skin. After quietly telling the kyuubi to back of for a while I slide the blade across.

The blood dripped down my arm, forming a pool of blood in the sink before vanishing for ever down the drain. A smile pulls across my lips as all the sorrow of that morning washes down the drain. The bad things of my life disappearing once again for a short moment. The feeling that I am not the course of the deaths of the ones I am blamed for. Everything just vanishing, at least for an hour or two.

The blood is slowly starting to stop and the smile on my face goes for yet another time. I quickly put a bandage on my arm covering my scars. Dressing in my bright colours and putting my fake smile on for the day I head out the door, into the horrid, cruel place they call life.

Jumping roof top to roof top I hear the whispering and cruel words that a being thrown at me. Some of the things that are yelled at me like "GO KILL YOUR SELF" or "DIE IN A HOLE YOU STUPID GOOD FOR NOTHING DEMON!" hurt more then getting stabbed with a knife. I wish they knew I tried to kill myself, trust me I did. But it it got to far the kyuubi would forget what I told him and come save me anyway. Sure he et me cut my self and let them scar and bleed but if it even came close to dying he came and helped anyway.

There it is the bridge where I am to meet my team mates. That bridge holds memory's of being abused by Sasuke or yelled at by Sakura or the stupid lie from my sensei when ever he is late. I wonder why I even call them memory's. Right now Sakura is at the bridge along with Sasuke. I jump down standing by the railing. I keep quiet and look at the water, I really cant be stuffed with what ever Sakura and Sasuke have to abuse me about this morning. I can see out of the corner of my eye that Sasuke and Sakura give each other a look and then shrug. I think that there thinking what's wrong with me.

Not long after I arrived did our sensei poof in front of us with some lame excuse.

"sorry I was looking for lee, he stole Gara's eye brows"

"LIAR!" yelled Sakura. Kakashi gave me a funny look as in asking why didn't you yell at me.

"Right well today we are to train tomorrow we have mission so 1 hour before training is over we must report to the hokage mansion. Right now lets go to training ground 6" we nod and start to follow our sensei. It isn't long before we are at training ground 6.

"sensei what sort of training are we doing today?" asked Sakura.

"Mostly chakra control , so standing on water, climbing trees that sort of thing" was the reply we got.

Sakura nodded obviously satisfied with the answer she got.

"Right Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura to the water"

"Hai!"

we made our way to the water. When ever we have training Sakura wears bathers underneath so she doesn't get her dress wet if she falls in. she took her dress off, Sasuke took his shirt off and I took nothing off. Sasuke looked at me.

"You gonna let your cloths get all wet dobe?" Sasuke said with a smirk.

"No because I'm not going to fall in" I reply back with a bit of sarcasm.

"dobe we all know that you always fall in"

"Well I wont today now just leave it" I reply. He nods and turns to the water.

I gather the chakra in my feet and steadily walk onto the water, as well as Sakura and Sasuke.

We stand facing our teacher. "Right! Do this well and I will allow free time at the end. We nod and start to dodge the stuff that is thrown at us. 1 mistake is all it takes, 1 mistake is all it takes. That is the sentence that is running through my head. Obviously that thought didn't work well because the next thing I know is that a rock hits me in the head knocking me out cold.

"you should have died"

what was that.

"Sasuke get some water out of my bag" I hear kakashi say.

"we don't want you here"

I open my eyes wanting to see who was taunting me. Little to my surprise kakashi was staring at me, as well as Sakura and Sasuke.

"Hey you okay?" kakashi asks me

I nod and give a little "mm"

I was handed water and started to drink from it.

I gave the water back to my sensei and looked around. Who could of said that.

"Why wont you die already"

"Did you say something" I say and look at kakashi

"no Naruto nobody said anything. Are you sure your okay?"

"Yea I'm fine" I get up and stand on my feet.

"Kakashi sensei isn't it time to see the Hokage?" Sakura asked.

"Yes it is right everybody to the Hokage mansion" kakashi said before he disappeared.

"Hokage sama we are here to receive our mission for tomorrow"

"Right. SHIZUNE BRING IN TEAM 7S MISSION FILE FOR TOMORROW!" called Tsunade.

Shizune was soon to scurry into the office. "Here you go ma lady" she said as she handed a file to the hokage.

Tsunade read over the file before telling us what the mission was for tomorrow.

"right tomorrow you will be delivering a report to the farmers on the other side of the fire country. The trip should take you a day. You will stay the night at the farm house and report back here the night after"

"Hai" we reply and leave the office.

I head home after we all say good bye. As I walk through the streets of the village I find people drunk or drugged up. It was getting late when someone from behind yelled at me "HEY MONSTER" they call I keep walking but I'm soon pushed into a wall.

"YOU KILLED MY WIFE MONSTER!"

"I'm sorry" I say.

"WELL TOO LATE! YOUR GOING TO MAKE UP TO ME WHAT I HAVNT BEEN ABLE TO DO FOR 12 YEARS!"

I knew what was coming next. He was going to rape me.

Before I knew it he had yanked down my pants and pushed me to the ground. I didn't even have the chance to think before he shoved his penis inside me. I didn't scream I just ignored him that way he would finish quicker.

It wasn't long before he pulled me up and shoved his cock inside of my mouth. I closed my eyes to pretend that I'm dead or at least unconscious but it didn't stop him from coming in my mouth then forcing me to swallow it. He walked away after telling me not to tell anyone.

I waited until I knew he was gone then stood up and pulling up my pants. It hurt to walk but once I could get home and bleed away the pain everything would be ok.

I ran for home as fast as I could without hurting myself any more.1 more step and I would be at my front door. One more stride and I would be in my lounge room. 3 more after and I would be in my bathroom with the Kunai knife.

I place the knife to my skin cutting it deep, but not deep enough to actually kill myself. The blood dripped from my arm, dripping into the sink, washing away my pain. The pain that courses so much more pain then there should be.

I cut away the harsh words, cut away the rapes that have been in my life. But mostly, cutting away life.

POEM by me:)

Cry like there's no tomorrow,

don't worry if anyone is watching,

its not what they think,

its what you feel.

Let the tears stream down your face,

let someone tell you its going to be ok,

don't listen to the lies,

listen to the truth.

cry your self to sleep at night,

tell the world your worries,

shout it at the top of your lungs,

cry like there is no tomorrow,

and don't let anyone tell you your wrong.

so what did you think of the story and the poem? remember reviews are lovely.