A/N: Well this is not really my typical thing...
Wait no, scratch that. This is right up my alley. Never mind. I guess the pairing is not my normal thing, but the context is pretty much my favorite kind of thing. I don't know how long this will be, probably not too long, but I'd say at least 2 chapters, maybe 3. That's actually the kind of format I like, and you'll get what I mean by that later.
So anyways, this is... this. I thought of it last night while trying desperately to fall asleep and had to force myself with everything I have NOT to just get up and write the damn thing, right then and there. I have like a bajillion other fics I have to write, but you know,what comes to me comes to me, and that's that.
Ok random but I wrote those last 2 sentences without looking at my keyboard or my screen cuz my cat got in my way. Irrelevant, I know, but just be proud of me, dammit!
Oh, and if you go to my profile, you'll see that this is a shared account. This is BandanasAreCool.
On to the story!
~*~*I think these page breaks make me unique. They're like my version of XOXO, JM*~*~
"Yeah, get your ass over here!" James cheered as the empty beer bottle came to a stop facing him.
The blonde Jennifer rolled her eyes.
"Come on, you know I'm good. I have references," he winked. Several people around the room giggled or blushed. The bottle seemed to be pointing at James quite often tonight.
She had to admit, James was the hottest guy there, and she was kind of drunk, and what the bottle says, goes.
The blonde Jennifer leaned in towards James, who quickly got her lips. The next thing she knew, he'd slipped his agile tongue right in there. The sly bastard.
They pulled back and James turned to point at Kendall.
"Kendall, it's your turn to spin!"
"But dude, Jo would be so pissed..."
"Jo would also be pissed if she smelled you right now. She doesn't like you smoking pot, she doesn't like you kissing people. And it's your turn. You can't pass AGAIN," James said.
Normally, Kendall would've refused. But his head was kind of spinning from the weed, and it was just kissing, and Jo was just such a KILLJOY sometimes.
"You know what, I AM gonna spin the bottle this time. And if Jo doesn't like it, then Jo can... can... Can I have the bottle?" Kendall slurred the last part, getting lost in his little proclamation. The room was spinning, and everyone seemed REALLY happy.
"Dude! Smoke it and pass it! You've had that thing for like forever!" That Kid Who Smells Like Cornchips called out.
Kendall handed him the joint he'd been holding and leaned forward to spin the bottle. It spun for a minute before finally stopping, and pointing at Camille.
"Ooooh, Camiiille!" James called out, pointing at her. "Your turn baby, kiss the man!"
Kendall's eyes went wide. Were Camille and Logan still together? Did they still like eachother? It was hard to tell sometimes.
"WOOOO!" Camille called out, "I win! Yeah! This game is like... SO COOL!" she clearly wasn't worried about Logan, who, like Jo, had stayed home.
"DO IT! DO IT!" The crowd cheered.
Kendall shrugged and kissed Camille. What was the worst that could happen?
They started to kiss, getting more into it as the seconds went on. Soon enough, they had swapped tounges and Kendall had managed to pull Camille into his lap; she sat with her legs straddled around his hips as they got more into it.
"Yeaahh!" James cheered them on, clearly not minding watching.
The sound brought them back to reality. They pulled apart, taking a deep breath.
*~*~Take a breather. This page break is to give you a moment to soak it all up.~*~*
Later that night, James looked across the throng of people grinding to see Kendall posed over some girl with a mass of curly brown hair. They were making out intensely, and he decided it'd be better if they didn't actually have sex right then and there in the middle of the room.
"Be right back," he whispered to Girl Wearing a Tight Dress, who he'd been grinding with. Maybe he'd figure her name out later. Something with an L...
"Hey, dude, get a room," he tapped Kendall on the shoulder just as Kendall had begun to slide his hands under the girl's shirt.
As Kendall pulled away, James noticed that the girl was Camille. He raised his eyebrows for a minute, then shrugged it off. He was glad to see that Kendall was letting loose. And he could see that Kendall had a boner. And Kendall looked determined. When Kendall was horny and determined, resistance was futile.
Maybe this should've been a wake-up call for Kendall. But he was really horny, and Jo barely ever let him do ANYTHING. Camille probably should've stopped for a second and thought that maybe she shouldn't be about to sleep with her best friend's boyfriend and sort of boyfriend ish thing's best friend. But her eyes just darkened and she winked at Kendall when he grabbed her wrist and dragged her back towards the bedrooms.
~*~*breakin' the page like yeah*~*~
"Dude, you wanna hit?" Guitar Dude asked, holding out a joint.
"SWEET!" Carlos squealed. "I'm so glad my friends aren't here right now! They never let me have any weed or alcohol or ANYTHING! They're all 'Carlos, you're crazy enoough already!' or 'Carlos! You'd just destroy everything!'"
"So... Do you want some?" Guitar Dude offered again, looking bored and confused as to why Carlos was telling him this.
"HELL yes," Carlos replied, taking the joint from Guitar Dude. He was about to raise it to his lips, when out of nowhere someone grabbed it out of his hands.
"No, you don't," Logan said, taking the joint, dropping it on the ground, and stepping on it.
"Aww, Logannn!" Carlos complained.
"Dude, do you have a new one?" Guitar Dude asked.
"Do you know the risks of getting high?" Logan asked, instantly switching to his young-doctor-lecture voice "You could do something you would regret. You ould get in trouble with the la-"
Guitar Dude walked away.
"Logan, what are you doing here?" Carlos asked.
"Getting you guys back home. It's almost two in the morning. Where are the other guys?"
"Umm... James is over there," Carlos pointed to where James was grinding with a gir in a low-cut strappy tank top. Tight dress girl had split. James looked over and saw Logan. His eyes got wide and he quickly excused himself from strappy tank top girl and ran over to where Carlos and Logan stood.
"...and I don't know where Kendall went," Carlos finished.
"Hey! Logan! Funny seeing you here!" James greeted, "What's up?" he curled his lip up and spread his hands out as he said it, trying to be casual, but just made himself all the more suspicious.
"James, where's Kendall?" Logan asked.
"The bathroom? Yeah, now that I think of it, there WAS something cool in the bathroom. Let's go see it Carlos!" he grabbed Carlos by the arm and dragged him into the bathroom.
"Dude, what is so awesome in here?" Carlos asked, seriously confused.
"Look, I have to get Kendall. I'd tell you why, but you'd just spill, so just stall Logan. Go get a beer. Or fail at hitting on some chick. That'll distra-"
"Hey! Whoever's in there, are you having sex? I feel like I'm gonna puke, and if you're not, I'm coming in," a loud male voice called and pounded on the door.
"Um... yeah, we are! Puke somewhere else!" James called. "Carlos, make girly sex sounds... now!" he hissed.
"WHAT?"
"Just do it!"
"Oooh... oh yeah baby," Carlos called in a high pitched voice.
"No! I'm better than that. Get more into it!"
"Oh, oh YEAH. YES! MORE MORE MORE!" Carlos moaned in his best girl voice.
"Yeah, you like that?" James groaned and kicked the wall.
"Oh, you're so good."
Outside the bathroom, Logan recognized James's voice. He shook his head and sighed.
"Okay, I think they cleared away," James whispered to Carlos. "I'll go out first, just in case." He paused and checked himself out in the mirror before leaving, "Damn, I am HOT." He quickly did The Face and left, satisfied.
James slipped out, gave Carlos a thumbs up, and ran to go find Kendall while Carlos went to stall Logan.
*~*~This is yet another page break! NOWAYNOWAY~*~*
James crept around upstairs, carefully listening in on every door. He could really use 32 bandanas...
"Oh baby, yes I want it bad," He recognized Camille's voice begging.
He opened the door quickly. Kendall was holding himself up over Camille, fucking her hard. She squirmed under him, clearly enjoying it.
"I hope you kids are using a condom," James said, announcing his presence.
"Dude!" Kendall yelled, pulling away from (and out of) Camille, who was caught off guard and fell off the bed.
"Get up. Get cleaned up. Get dressed. Logan's here," James said quickly, all buisness. He then smiled casually, "Oh good, you did use a condom."
"What?" Kendall yelled, horribly confused.
"Remember that Logan guy? The one who's sorta with Camille? And your best friend? He's here. In this house. Get yourself together."
"Oh my god... shit..." Camille said.
"Yeah, you better wait in here for awhile, just to not come out all together," James said, then added, "oh, and by the way, this is one more person I've seen naked," He grinned.
"One?" Camille asked.
"Yeah. You think this is the first time I've seen Kendall naked?" James said with a wink, closing the door.
"Wow," Kendall said, "that was awkward. Sorry about that."
"DID YOU NOT HEAR HIM?" Camille shrieked and slapped Kendall across the face, "Logan's here! Get some clothes on!"
"Jesus, that's not what you were saying a minute ago." She slapped him again.
After they were dressed, Kendall got up, ready to leave.
"Hey Camille," he called, "thanks," he planted a quick kiss on her lips.
As soon as he got outside, he was confronted by James.
"Did you have a good time?" James asked with a mischevious smirk, flicking his hair out of his face.
"Well yeah," Kendall said, "but I kinda got cut short there."
"Hey, it is NOT my fault Logan got here! You should thank me! I had to pretend to fuck Carlos to save your ass!" James whisper-yelled.
Kendall raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "Ok, are we ready to go?'
"Definitely not," James replied, "you look and smell like you just had sex. Logan wasn't born yesterday." He pulled a can of CUDA Manspray out of nowhere, sprayed Kendall, pulled his lucky comb out and fixed his hair, and straightened Kendall's shirt out.
"There," he proclaimed, "NOW we're ready to go."
"But if you did that in ten seconds, how does it take you two hours to get ready in the morning?" Kendall asked, confused.
"This is me we're talking about," James answered, "I think I need to look a LITTLE better than you do. People expect something of me. It's a lot of work to be the sexy one."
Kendall rolled his eyes and they went downstairs.
~*~*Dayumm, it's a page break.*~*~
James and Kendall came downstairs to find Carlos with his arms around Logan's legs. Logan was slowly dragging him along as he tried to get through the crowd. Apparently this was Carlos's way of "stalling."
"Oh there you are," Carlos said, relieved, and let go of Logan's legs, flopping to the floor.
"I heard you having sex in the bathroom," Logan said to James, "so I see what took you so long finding Kendall."
"Yeah, thanks for covering for me Carlos!" James laughed nervously and winked at him. Kendall raised an eyebrow, wondering what had actually happened while he was sleeping with Camille. Carlos just nodded, confused.
"You know there are serious health risks when it comes to having sex in unsanitary environments," Logan began to lecture, "since it is an exchange in bodi-"
"Hey! So are you guys gonna go home or what?" James asked, cutting him off.
"You're not coming?" Kendall asked him.
"I'll be home soone enough. I still have to take care of buisness, if you know what I mean," James explained with a suggestive note in his voice.
"But didn't you just..." Logan pointed towards the bathroom, confused.
"I wasn't DONE! I just... knew I had to get Kendall... and be responsible. So if you smell sex at all, it's me. Just me," James explained, shrugging as if this was the most obvious thing ever.
"Riiight..." Logan nodded, one eyebrow raised. He didn't even want to know.
*~*~Okay, I'm finally done. Last page break!~*~*
A/N: So I'm thinking three chapters for this now. Review dudes! Love you all! I hope you liked this. I know it was kind of a weird couple, but I feel like it just works for this.