Her laptop flew onto the floor, along with other personal objects as they flew across the room one by one...she was on a rampage throughout her hive. She fell for it again. She fell for HIM again. She had been stupid for the second time in a row, hoping things would have worked out. Hoping that he had changed, and that he had learned the lesson. But he obviously had not. He used her again, played with her like a toy until he was satisfied. And in the end, threw her away like a broken doll...
"Doll."
That was how he had always called her. She had always loved his nicknames for her, but now they are all nothing but stab wounds through her chest. She blankly stared at the computer she had thrown to the ground. There was no light in her eyes, and the sparks of happiness within her soul had been long since gone. She became lost in her thoughts to the point that she didn't notice the constant knocking at her door. The knocking had been going on for several minutes now. All of sudden, she felt relief; she felt happiness again. She was ready to fall into his arms again, and she was more than ready to give him a third chance, a fourth one, or even a fifth one. If she kept trying, she would definitely succeed, and she was sure about it.
She rushed to the door; burgundy colored tears running down her cheeks as a big smile painted onto her full lips, eager to meet her lover's.
Unfortunately, her hope was short lived as she opened the door of her hive; heart sinking down her stomach as she stared at the figure behind the door.
"Kankri?!"
She raised an eyebrow at the troll, spelling his name as if he wasn't even real. Damara murmured some words in her wicked Japanese, something not even him understood. She stepped back, anticipating to slam the door between the two. Unfortunately for her, the mutant blood had foreseen her actions. As a result, he moved quickly, managing to slip in before she could push him away.
"Please leave or I angry. Not in good mood."
"I know, and that's why I'm here. I came to your hive as soon as I could, considering my goal is to make sure no one in the session gets triggered by anyone else's actions... especially when it comes to quadrant issues; considering how frequent these issues have surfaced around as of late. I would gladly talk this out if it doesn't trigg-"
"Fucking. Shut. Your. MOUTH. You know NOTHING of quadrants but you WANTING GIVE ADVICE to me. How about you go back to hive and stick nubs horns in ass?"
He was eager to reply to her latter response. Eager to tell her how triggering her words were to him. Eager to tag the profanities and to moderate her language overall, but no sounds would escape his lips... Possibly due to the fact that she would have slammed her strife specibus up into his lower back with all the strength she had if he were to make another sound, and he definitely didn't want that. The female sat down on her couch, burying her face in her hands as she tried to hold back her tears. And further more, trying to clear her mind from all the memories that reminded her of Rufioh in anyway possible.
Unfortunately, her efforts seemed to be in vain. It wasn't working, and she knew her anger was only making her feel worse.
-You thought it would have worked this time, didn't you?
She didn't move, her head still buried deep her hands. She closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh, still trying to hold back the tears that had already built around the edges of her eyes.
-Yes.
-Broken plates will always be broken. No matter how much glue you apply. No matter how well you manage to hide the cracks, they will always be there. Please stop trying, seriously. I will not give you assurance and comfort you, especially if it means I will be ignoring the truth. I simply refuse to do so! And further more, it will most certainly NOT benefit your well-being, which I do not have any purpose of compromising in the first place. Damara, it has been sweeps, and you still haven't moved on. It's over, but you fell into his trap again.
-What you know about me anyways? What you know about flushed feelings? How about you leave? That would not trigger me! But this conversation DOES.
He became silent. It was true. There was not much he knew about the Aries and red romance. He had flushed feelings for Latula in the past, but they had never been together. But the most important most of all, he was never deceived by her the same way Damara was.
As a response, he placed a box on the couch, and fortunately it was able to catch Damara's attention. She peeked through her fingers, her eyes staring at the box before meeting up with Kankri's. Without any hesitation, she moved the box on her lap, slowly opening it to see what was within. Her mouth went agape. Japanese food. Fucking. Japanese. Food. Where in hell did he found such a thing? And most importantly, why did he even bother to bring it to her hive? She furrowed her eyebrows as she returned her attention to the man. She gave him a cautious look, foot tapping against the floor.
-Is it poison?
-As triggering as it sounds... you're already dead, and poisoning you wouldn't make much sense. Not to mention, I wouldn't have any reason to-
-Then why? Where you find this?
-Porrim's descendant is in matespritship with a human. I inquired the recipe from her and then I tried to mimic it myself. It looks decent, but I am not quite sure about the taste though. It should be alright. You don't have to eat it, of course, I am just simply testing the waters. Although, I believe it would have been thoughtful of me to give it to you.
His blabber came to a halt when Damara reached for the sticks that was holding her hair in the probably-will-never-be-loosened bun she kept on all the time. She pulled the sticks off, allowing her hair to fall gently to her shoulders. She then skillfully used the sticks to pick up an Onigiri, proceeding to put it into her mouth.
He waited, hands resting in his lap as he impatiently glanced at her.
-How's that?
-Is alright.
He was glad. Damara wasn't the kind of troll to compliment others that much, so the lack of insults was indeed a good sign.
...Actually, when she said "alright", she actually meant that it was fucking horrendous. Nevertheless, she appreciated the effort, and she was not that disrespectful enough to blame it on Kankri.
While Damara continued to try to enjoy the meal Kankri put so much effort in preparing for her, she couldn't help but notice the small glances he was giving her every now and then. Eventually, her eyes met his once more, causing him to panic a little. She raised a brow in response to the mutant blood's expression. She didn't bother to ask and proceeded to finish her food. Her lips curling in a smile, but it was not a warm one. Damara's smiles were never warm, they were cold, mischievous, and always left other trolls wondering what was going through her mind.
-Me and you can watch funny videos if you like. Since you are here and I don't know what we do to say thank you.
He shrugged, not really knowing a proper response. As a result, she stood up and reached for her pack of cigarettes. She lighted up one and walked to her desk to open a drawer that contained another laptop. Apparently, she had two. Kankri thought it was smart of her to do so.
Damara returned with the spare laptop and sat next to him. With the computer on her lap, she started typing some Japanese words Kankri could not understand into the search box. However, it all became clear as she hit the play button.
Cats.
The two began to watch videos of really cute Earth cats playing with humans, making adorable noises, showing their little paws, and rolling on the floor. He glanced at her and noticed that her smile had softened, as well as her other features in general. Every now and then she would even let out a small giggle, even though she looked like she was struggling to hold back the tears that continued to run down from her eyes. As many moments passed, those eyes eventually grew tired and she fell asleep with her head resting on Kankri's shoulder. At first his muscles tensed up in response, but he proceeded to relax as well. He slowly took the computer from her lap and placed it on his own. Unfortunately, everything on it appeared to only be in Japanese, but that did not stop his curiosity from growing. He began to look through her folders. Apparently it was a backup laptop, considering the amount of conversations she had with others that was keeping as notepad files. She even had the ones she had exchanged with him. That was extremely clever of her, he thought, she definitely can use those conversations as her weapon against others.
No, Damara simply enjoys to keep things...
All of them.
On the contrary, Kankri was sure he didn't need to keep anything; for he was certain that his memory could never fail him.
The female troll snuggled more into his shoulder causing him to tense up once more and closing the laptop, proceeding to place it on the other side of the couch. However, the clicking sound made Damara flinch. Her tired eyes opened as she looked up at Kankri, lips curling into a smile.
-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up.
-No problem. You still here?
-Of course. I would have most likely disturb you in your sleep if I were to move or the like. It seems like I woke you up anyways though. I was probably too noisy, unfortunately.
-Cute.
-...Excuse me?
Her reply was full of chuckles and funny looks. Her hands reached out for the cigarette she had left unfinished and proceeded to light it up again. With her skinny, long fingers, she brought the cigarette to to her lips as she inhaled deeply.
-Are you aware of how poisonous those things are for you? It's not healthy for you to be so stubborn and not care about your well-being. I suggest that you quit immediately.
Her expression stayed the same as she grabbed a fistful of his sweater, facing him a few inches from her nose. Damara exhaled the smoke right on his face, causing him to cough.
-Quit talking, and maybe I quit too.
He didn't try to force himself out of her grip, but he responded with an angry and disappointed expression while furrowing his brows and crossing his arms. That only caused her smile to widen as she continued pulling him closer to her as she kept blowing smoke onto his face, apparently enjoying how his eyes would fill with red tears. He obviously triggered by the poisonous air. It didn't take long until he couldn't handle it anymore. He snatched the cigarette from her fingers, bent it in half, and thew it on the floor.
-You make me quit. Now you can't talk. Or not equal.
He furrowed his eyebrows in response, but just as he opened his mouth to speak, he felt her hands against his cheeks and her lips on his own, and thus making it impossible for him to make a single sound. His eyes widened in shock as she pulled back, her usual malicious grin adorning her lips as she continued to stare at him. Her hands moved past his ears into his hair, undoing all the messy knots within its ebony strands.
It took him a few seconds to absorb completely what just happened. As his lips parted again to complain, they were met again by hers. However, the second time wasn't a joke, or at least it didn't felt like it was. In fact, he could have sworn he felt her tongue pressing against his lips, eager to meet his own. He obviously denied such a request, and the Aries didn't look pleased about it.
-Refused me like he did, can't say I didn't see it come.
-Do you realize you're trying to seduce me simply because you think that it will fill the void within your heart?
-Do you realize you must stop thinking you know all and think you're in my head?
That was enough to make his afflux of words stop. That was enough for his heart to drop in his stomach as realization hit him hard like a rock. He tried to mutter an apology, but her response was an annoyed scoff as she rolled her blank eyes.
-It wasn't to fill void, it was because I think you're nice. And maybe could work.
-A matespritship?
-Yes, redrom.
That was a surprise. It was probably due to the fact that, although she was keeping her cold demeanor, the troll seemed genuine.
-You scare me. You're way too secretive about yourself for me to acce-
-No problem don't talk, I do not beg. If you think I did it why I'm lonely, you completely don't known me and you suck.
Her words cut like a knife, and the Cancerian felt them sting on his skin. As his anger flew away, it was replaced by remorse and shame soon after. He had always tried to make sure no one felt triggered, but his behavior of assuming things had offended her more than he had expected. He was feeling attraction towards her, but he couldn't tell if his own feelings were genuine or that he was only glad he'd found someone who wanted a red relationship with him. On the other hand, his vows and her broken heart were making it even harder for him to decide. But maybe, for once in his whole life, he should follow his instincts.
His hand then reached for hers, his thumb pressing lightly on her palm as he tried to smile as warmly as he could. His long fingers traced patterns on her skin. Her eyes finally met his as she raised an eyebrow with an incredulous look on her face. Damara didn't flinch as his arm slid behind her back as her piercing gaze heavily on him during these deadly, silent moments.
-If you want, I can leave.
She couldn't help but giggle, shaking her head in resignation as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
-Kankri Vantas you are a fucking sucker and you deserve the worst death and I'll be sure to make you have it, virgin boy. And is platonic hate, not black advances.
-You should probably tag it next time, that was rather triggering.
-If this is to tag, I'm afraid you'll have to hashtag my whole body this night.
That was enough to make him shut up.