From the author's desk: I am CLEARLY out of practice. This is the first complete thing I've written in over a year, longer than that even. And of course, my first completed thing is a gift for someone else.
Oz (aka CaptainOzone—if you have not read her fanfics, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? UNDER A ROCK? GO READ THEM), my dear fanfiction friend from my Merlin days, had a birthday recently (LIKE TWO MONTHS AGO? THIS IS SO LATE, OMG). I promised her a gift for any prompt of her choosing, and she, wonderful human that she is, chose sibling bonding with no fandom indicated. So naturally, I went with SAO. Because you know, feelings. Also, I love a good sibling bonding fic, too, and there's just not enough Kazuto and Suguha fic that's not incestuous.
So here, have my feelings, and enjoy this angsty-but-fluffy…thing.
Disclaimer: I do not own Sword Art Online. That's all Reki Kawahara's (and his associates') genius. Just having some fun with the characters. Title and lyrics at the beginning and end are from "Safe Here" by Anberlin.
Notes: Unbeta-ed. Takes place between the end and beginning of the SAO and ALO arcs respectively. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, OZ!
A Chance
by dreamsweetmydear
xxx
But if all can be made right there's still a chance on New Years' Day
And if all is well that means there's still a chance in hell
xxx
Suguha sat up in bed, looking around her darkened room blearily, trying to figure out what woke her up. Grumbling in frustration, she rubbed her eyes and prepared to lay back down with a grimace.
A muffled shout cut the silence of the house, and immediately brought her to alertness. Another scream had her scrambling out of bed and down the hall as recognition hit her.
Kazuto was screaming.
Again.
She stood in front of her brother's door, hesitating. Should she go inside? For so long, her brother's room had been recognized by the whole family as his space, one he wasn't there to fill for the last few years. It felt wrong to just barge in like this. On the other hand, his body was still pretty frail from two years spent unconscious in a bed—if she didn't do something soon, he could hurt himself, and no one wanted to see him end up back in the hospital when he had just come home a few days ago…
Mind made up, Suguha announced her presence firmly through the door. "Kazuto? I'm coming in!"
The sight that greeted her upon entering broke her heart. Kazuto thrashed in a tangle of bedclothes, his expression agonized as sweat plastered his recently trimmed hair to his head. He moaned lowly, the elongated sound pushing her forward toward her brother. Her hand latched on to his shoulder, shaking him.
"Kazuto! Wake up, you're dreaming! C'mon Kazuto!"
"No!"
Suguha wasn't quite prepared for the force with which Kazuto suddenly woke, his wiry arms pushing her away and causing her to fall back on the floor. Her brother's harsh, gasping sobs filled the air, and Suguha watched as he fell back into his pillows, curling up on his side to face the wall.
Unsure if what she was about to do was going to help her brother or not, Suguha stood and made her way back to her brother's bed. Making herself comfortable against the headboard, she reached her hand out and gently began carding her fingers through his hair.
She wasn't sure how much time passed before her brother grew quiet and still. Feeling him shift under her fingers, Suguha pulled her hand away and watched her brother turn toward her.
"S-Suguha," he rasped, "what are you doing here?"
"I, um, heard you yelling," she explained, averting her gaze to look at the crisscrossing threads of the comforter. "I got worried, so I came to check on you."
"Oh," he said. "Sorry for disturbing you."
"I-It was no big deal." Peeking at her brother as he carefully sat up to lean against the headboard next to her, his knees tented similarly to hers, Suguha wondered what else to say.
She had questions of course. What was he dreaming about? What was making him cry and scream like that? Why was he apologizing for bothering her?
…What happened to him in the last two years he'd been gone?
But Kazuto wasn't talking, his gaze dull and haunted, and Suguha didn't want to push. She didn't want to hurt him even more.
They sat in the silence of their thoughts for quite awhile, until the faint chime from the clock downstairs echoed up to them.
A smile spread across her face. It was officially the day of New Year's Eve.
"Hey Kazuto, this time tomorrow, it'll be a new year," Suguha said. "Do you know what you're going to wish for when we visit the shrine on New Year's Day?"
When she received silence, Suguha looked back at her brother. He was awake, but clearly his mind was elsewhere, a sorrowful look on his face. She poked him gently in the shoulder, hoping to snap him out of it. "Kazuto? Hey, Kazuto…"
"Huh?" he responded with a slight shake of his head.
"Ugh, if you're just going to space out on me, I'm going to go back to my room. It's rude not to listen when people are talking to you," Suguha pretended to complain, hoping she could continue to draw her brother back out of his thoughts.
He shook his head more firmly, and gave her a tiny, sheepish smile. "Sorry, Sugu. What were you saying?"
"I was saying that it's almost the new year. Do you know what you're going to wish for when we go to the shrine on New Year's Day?" she repeated.
"O-Oh, um, not really, no," Kazuto stammered. "I haven't really thought about it. How about you?"
"Hmm. Probably just to do well at the kendo tournaments coming up. And to do well on my entrance exams. And of course, all the other stuff like happiness and peace for us all."
"Those are good wishes," Kazuto commented. "I'm going to have to think about mine a bit before I can say what they are."
Suguha had an idea of what one of his wishes might be. Three-hundred SAO players had yet to wake up, after all, and from what she knew, some of them were her brother's friends. At least two were still comatose in the hospital where he had been not too long ago.
"I do love the new year, though," Suguha continued, trying to keep the conversation upbeat. "Getting dressed up and all that is nice, but really, I just like that we get to start over."
"But is it really starting over?" her brother wondered, voice pained. "The things we did in the year before, the good and the bad, can't always be forgotten. So is it really fair to say that the new year is a truly new start?"
Suguha frowned. "That's kinda depressing, Kazuto. The new year is supposed to be solemn but hopeful."
"Sorry," Kazuto murmured with a duck of his head. "It's…kinda hard to see it that way right now."
Kazuto was right, of course, but Suguha wasn't ready to agree. "But, if you give up on hope, then how are we ever supposed to keep moving forward in life? That just seems like a really sad way to look at the world."
Her brother didn't say anything in response, and when Suguha looked over at him again, his expression was pinched, his brow creased in deep thought.
Hearing the clock strike the 1:00 AM chime, Suguha shook her head and got out from under her brother's blanket, a bright smile back on her face as she looked down at him. "Anyway, it's still going to be a great celebration this year, because you're home. We…we missed you the last couple years."
Kazuto's dark eyes studied her thoughtfully, searching her expression for something, before his lips curved up into a small smile, one more open than Suguha had seen in awhile. "Yeah. It'll be nice to be here with all of you again. I-I missed you guys too." She caught a mischievous gleam in his eye as his smile became more of a smirk. "Plus, I have two years on New Year's money to collect on top of this year."
Suguha rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Aren't you supposed to be the older, more mature one? You're setting a terrible example for me, you know," she tossed back as she began walking away, grinning as she heard him chuckle softly behind her. Glancing back, she gave Kazuto one last once over to make sure he would be okay for the rest of the night. "Good night, big brother."
"Night, Sugu. And thanks," he said as he lowered himself back down into his bedcovers. Suguha felt her cheeks warm in embarrassment as she left his room, closing the door behind her.
"You idiot. You don't have to thank me," she muttered while climbing back into bed. "I'm your sister. Of course I'm going to help you."
She fell asleep moments later with a smile on her face.
xxx
There is shelter, shelter from the mire of life
Claiming sanctuary from the fire that drove you in
You are safe here, safe here in these arms of mine
xxx
fin