Ok, let me make this clear, Relena Peace Craft is a singer of a band named 'Forever Bitch' (that is the name of a band my sister is in, you take the name you die!). She writes the lyrics and sings them. They sound like, guess who? Staind, just with a female voice. The bass guitar player is Hilde Shezbecker (Sorry if it's spelt wrong!) who also sings sometimes. The other guitar player is Catherine Bloom (Believe it or not!) and the drummer is Nikki Clay who sometimes also writes songs for the band, and does sing, it is possible! ^_^
Relena stood out on the stage and looked at all the people. She thought of Heero and all of the shit he pulled and began to hear the guitar and chimes. As the guitar began to stop the chimes from the drums continued after that it all went to gether and played the song 'A flat' infront of the loud crowd of people. Relena began to sing her parts.
Relena:
Trust In me cant trust I'm the whore I don't believe it
All my life so scarred what for who you can't conceive it
Everything you fear Ill be here you couldn't live it
I whisper in your ear so loud, why can't you hear it
I'm OK
Nikki: Im ok
Hilde: Im Ok
Catherine: Im ok
Relena:
All my faith is gone you think I couldn't find it
Pieces falling down shattered now get behind it
In my mind alone, Lost in here I'm separated
Crawl deeper in my hole safe in here from what I hated
Relena and Hilde:
All the demons in my head won't leave me
I know I can hear them
All the sacrifices made for nothing
Don't show can't believe it
Want to show that I'm good for something
I can't you won't let me
Are you running cause your words won't heal me
Because you can't accept me
relena:
And I hate myself
And I hate my face
And I hate my world
And I hate my ways
relena: And I
relena and Hilde: And I
All except Nikki: And I
All: And I
Nikki: I'M NOT OK!
IM NOT OK!
IM NOT OK!
Relena:
I'm OK
Hilde: Im ok
Catherine: Im Ok
Nikki: Im Ok
relena:
Trust In me cant trust I'm the whore I don't believe in
All my life so scarred what for who you can't conceive it
Everything you fear Ill be here you couldn't live it
I whisper in your ear why can't you feel it
Relena and Hilde:
All the demons in my head won't leave me
I know I can hear them
All the sacrifices made for nothing
Don't show can't believe in
Want to show that I'm good for something
I can't you won't let me
Are you running cause your words won't heal me
Because you can't accept me
I don't believe it
All: I don't believe it
When they finished the crowed went wild and cheered loudly. Relena smiled . "Do we have a request?" Nikki said into her own mic. Relena went to the crowd and picked a partly cute guy from the crowd. "What do you want to hear us play?" Relena said. "I wanna hear Suffocate." he said in a yell. Relena nodded and walked back to her spot on the stage. "Well you heard him, girls, get ready!" Relena said.
I feel nothing
Longing for something
Lie in bed to take your clothes off
Show me what you're made of
Just to soothe me
(All alone)
Leave me here I'm dying
(All alone)
Just kicked me in my face
(All alone)
All alone and crying
(All alone)
I suffocate
I'm not gifted
Slightly twisted
Try hard try hard
To see if I can push you any further
Just to soothe me
(All alone)
Leave me here I'm dying
(All alone)
Just kicked me in my face
(All alone)
All alone and crying
(All alone)
I suffocate
Please believe you'll save me, rearrange me
I can feel your feelings running through me
Take away my sorrow my tomorrow
Heal me
(All alone)
Leave me here I'm dying
(All alone)
Just kicked me in my face
(All alone)
All alone and crying
(All alone)
I suffocate
I'm suffocating
SUFFOCATE (come suffocate)
As the song ended Relena wiped the sweat from her brow. She was jumping around the stage as they sang the song. She smiled and looked out at all the people. "WE HAD FUN! SADLY WE HAVE TO GO! THANKS FOR COMING!" she screamed into the mic. She walked off the stage as the lights went off and the band left the stage. The hole stadium was lighted up so people could get out of their seats and go home. As the band's crew packed their stuff up they loaded the tour bus and headed to Japan. Home. Relena sighed, she didn't want to go home, that's not where she was suppose to be. Nikki agreed that she would rather be on the road than at her home town.
Relena sat in a seat next to one of the dark tinted window. She held her note pad that held all of her songs she wrote. She held her pen and tried to think of a new song. The band was something she did for fun, since she left the sanq kingdom she needed something to do and this ended up the option she wanted. Still something was missing and she knew what it was. Heero was still cold and distant. He refused to leave her though, the only time he wouldn't be around her was when she was on tour. Relena feared every time she was coming home from tour that Heero would be gone. Duo and Hilde are getting married in 3 months and Catherine and her brother Trowa were happy with this since Catherine was begging to get tired of the circus. Nikki on the other hand was well, she was 'nothing' in her words. She could play the drums and that was good enough for her. Relena though tried to get Nikki to talk to her, in ways Nikki was like Heero, though Nikki actually talked.
As Relena looked out the window she didn't notice Nikki sitting next
to her. "So you trying to write a new song?" Nikki said and took Relena
out of her thoughts. Relena nodded "Yes, but I can't seem to come up with
anything." she said. Nikki smiled "What do you feel now? Write it down
and make it into a song, that's what I do. Anyway, good luck, Im going
to get me some vodka." Nikki said and walked off. 'What am I feeling?'
Relena thought to herself 'Fear of Heero gone when I come home, fear of
him never having feelings for me.' she thought and began to write.
---The band's house and where Heero, Trowa and Duo are. (It's in Japan ^_~)---
Heero sat in the living room with a laptop in his lap and he typed like always. Duo was watching Power Puff girls an humming the theme at the same time. Trowa just sat on the couch with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed. It seemed like it was a peaceful house intill...
"WHERE BACK!!!" Hilde screamed as she ran in the door. Duo jumped up and ran to Hilde picking her up. Catherine walked in and gave her brother a hug and walked up to her room. Nikki walked in silently and just went to the study to be alone with her bags in her hands. Relena walked in last with her bags and a note book in her hand. She looked at the tour bus and waved by the bus driver and their manger. She turned around to everyone and smiled. Duo gave her a hug and Trowa nodded to her. Heero looked up at her and that was when he noticed her outfit.
Since Relena wasn't in school and 22 she would wear her own cloths and today she was wearing a black beanie with the words 'Snoogens' on it in red. (A/N: I LOVE JASON MEWES!!! ^_^) She had a black string strapped shirt that showed her stomach and black jencos with black sneakers. "WOW CHeck out Relena." Duo yelled while looking at Relena. Hilde pulled hard on duo's braid. "OWWW!!!" Duo screeched and saw that Heero was giving him a death glare. "What happened to the wu-man?" Hilde said noticing that Justice boy wasn't around. (A/N: I pick on Wu-man too much ^_^) "He went to see Sally at the Perventers Head Quarters and before you ask Quatra is on L4 for some family problems." Trowa said.
"Well, Im going to the band room, I have a song and I wanna pick out
some kinda beat for it." Relena said while heading to the band room where
they kept all of the band's things and where they would work on new stuff
or rehearse. Heero stood up and followed Relena while looking at her bags
she left. "Have the butler take care of those." he said while heading to
the band room.
Relena pulled her headphones on while hearing some different tunes. Heero watched her from the door way as she changed from tune to tune. A smile came to her face and she began to type up a rhythm for the band. It was almost Dinner time and she was done. Heero had still been watching her just admiring how much she had grown and how lovely she looked. He noticed she stood up and he walked out of the room.
Relena put the papers inside her note book and just walked out of the band room. She headed up to her room unaware that Heero was following her. She went into her room and left the door open. "Something new to wear, I need something nice, but not to school girl nice." she said aloud. She went through her drawers until she found what she wanted to wear. She went into her bath room to change and take a shower.
Heero walked into her room and looked around at the things on the wall. Since they left the Sanq Kingdom Relena has been a completely different person than before. She only worked on her songs and stayed in her room listening to music she likes. Her room was dark and it normally sent chills down anyone's back. It was painted black and so was everything in it. The four post bed was black with black see through sheets over it. Their where pictures of KoRn, Limp Bizkit, Papa Roach and Pink Floyd all over the walls. There was one thing that caught his attention it was a frame with a picture of him on her bed side table. It's frame was cracked and hate written in black marker over it. His eyes was filled with hurt. He loved Relena, and now she hated him. He set the frame down.
Relena pulled up her jeans and zipped them up. She walked out and saw Heero setting her frame of him down. Her eyes widened as she pulled she belt around her jeans. Heero looked at her with the sign of hurt in his eyes. "I can explain." she said. Heero looked at her as the hurt turned to pain and then vanished into the perfect emotionless eyes. 'How could she explain this? She hates me it's that simple.' he thought. Relena pulled the belt tight and fastened it. She then noticed she only had her bra on and her face turned 5 different shades of red. Heero just looked at her once he noticed it. She did fill out very well in that area he had to itmit. Relena pulled her trench coat off the hanger in the door and put it on. 'This will have to do.' she thought. She walked to him. She picked up the frame and looked at Heero. "I did this after you followed me to Japan. I wanted to be alone, but now I have learned to grow with it." she said and set the frame down. "Why not get a new frame?" Heero said still not buying it. "Because, it never bothered me, as long as I could see your eyes I was happy." she said. Heero looked at the picture and noticed that not a crack or part of the writing was on his eyes area. "Im afraid of love as much as you are heero, if not then more." she said and walked to her closet. She pulled out a long sleeved black shirts with the saying 'I need No One' on it. She took off her trench coat and set it on the hanger the shirt was on. She put the shirt on and pulled it down a little but it only went right up just enough to show her belly button. She took her trench coat and set it on her bed. She really didn't notice Heero was still there. Heero was in his own world at the time. 'Afraid of it? I know I am, but why her?' was all that ran through his head. Relena put on knee high black boots. She laced them up to the top and tied it together. She grabbed the Trench coat and put it on then, headed to her bag next to Heero. Heero had just came out of his thoughts and grabbed Relena's wrist and pulled him to her. "Why are you afraid of it?" he asked. She looked into his eyes. He looked so confused just then but his eyes went back to the emotionless state once more. "Because rejection is a bitch." she said and pulled her arm away. Heero nodded and let go of her wrist. Relena grabbed her black back pack and through one strap over her shoulder. She grabbed her black beanie with the words 'Snoogens' on it and put it on. Heero had already walked out of her room and was probably waiting outside the door to find were she was going. She headed for the door and was stopped at the stars by heero. "Where are you going?" he said in a monotone voice. "To a friends, I'll be back by 11." she said and walked passed him. Nikki was walking out of the study down stairs right next to the stair case and saw Relena walking to the door. "Going to Jane's?" she asked. Relena nodded. "Can I come?" nikki asked again. "Yeah, it'll probably prevent Heero from following me and I need to talk to you about a song I made." Relena replied. Nikki just smirked and headed out the door with Relena.
'Go follow her.' a voice inside Heero told him. 'No, she has Nikki, she'll be ok.' he thought. Heero sighed and walked into his room locking the door behind him.
Nikki and Relena were talking more of the way and it seemed like everything was goin smoothly intill Nikki said something interesting. "You love him, I can tell." she said. Relena's head snapped up from her papers in her hands to Nikki who was driving. "What do you mean?" she said acting dumb. "Don't act like that around me, I see it." Nikki said. "Fine, yes I love him." Relena replied. Just then the car stopped and they where at Jane's. They both got out and headed to the door and knocked. A girl with long black hair and pale skin and a long black skirt on with a Doors shirt on and no shoes opens the door, she is extremely skinny and has several bracelets up and down her arms. "Hey, come in." she said cheerfully and moved so they could come in.
As the night went on Relena was now asleep on Jane's couch in her room and Nikki was painting a picture of a man looking like Heero with a rope around his neck pulled tightly up to a tree branch. "I don't think Relena would like that very much, Nickel." Jane said looking at her painting. "Do not call me Nickel and I don't care, this is want I want to do to him. He is such an asshole to Relena sometimes. Im so happy that Relena has changed into a self confident person. He can't hurt her any longer." nikki replied. She stood up and shook Relena. "We need to go Rel, come on get up." she said. Relena only nodded and stood up. She looked at the painting but it didn't bother her since she was still half a sleep. THey slowly got to the car due to Relena's laziness.
When they got home Nikki had trouble getting Relena out of the car. She heard the front door open and saw Trowa. She smiled with relief. "Can you please help me. She is too heavy for me to hold. SHe passed out while we were gone." she said. Trowa only nodded and picked up Relena. Nikki locked the car and followed Trowa. Nikki pulled Relena's bed covers back as Trowa set her on the bed. Nikki tucked her in and walked out after Trowa did. Nikki looked at Trowa. "Thanks." was all she said and went to her room and trowa went to his.
The next morning Relena woke up and didn't feel like changing. She grabbed a biscuit from in the kitchen and went into the band room to find Nikki, Cat (im calling Catherine that it's so easy!) and Hilde messing with their instruments. She looked around more to see Heero sitting down in the room of all the sound check system with Trowa and Duo. Relena walked to the mic and opened the note book on the stool next to it. She pulled out her music sheets and handed them to the band. "It's a new song for a new CD maybe. It's called home." she said and they all nodded. Relena went to the mic and stood their. "What inspired you to write this?" Hilde said while reading the lyrics. "Heero..." she said and Heero's head shot straight up and looked into Relena's eyes. Relena looked at the lyrics and waited for the music to start. The drums began and the guitar as well and Relena began to sing:
I force myself through another day
Can't explain the way today just fell apart like everything
Right in my face
And I try to be the one
I can't accept this all because of you
I've had to walk away
From everything
Heero watched her as she rocked back and forth with the mic in her hand.
I'm afraid to be alone
Afraid you'll leave me when I'm gone
I'm afraid to come back home
Another sleepless night again
Hotel rooms my only friend
And friends like that just don't add up
To anything
And I try so hard to be everything
That I should never take away from you again
'Cause I heard ya say
Heero's heart was hurting so bad as he listened to the lyrics.
I'm afraid to be alone
Afraid you'll leave me when I'm gone
I'm afraid to come back home
I cannot forget
I live with regret
I cannot forget
I live with...
'With regret? What could she regret?' Heero thought as she then looked into his eyes. He saw the tears that were forming as she sang.
I'll live through this
I can't see through this
I can't do this anymore
I'm afraid to be alone
Afraid you'll leave me when I'm gone
I'm afraid to come back home
Afraid you'll leave me when I'm gone
I just wish I was back home
Home
As Relena dragged out 'Home' heero was walking into the band room.
She looked at him and finished her song. He looked at her and mouthed 'We
need to talk.' she nodded and followed him out of there.
"What was that about?" duo said while walking into the band room. Everyone shrugged except Nikki.
---outside of the house near the forest near by---
"Why would you think I would leave you?" Heero said while looking into Relena's eyes. "I-I.....you never really showed that you would stay other than protecting me..." she said slowly. Heero placed his hand on her cheek and caressed it. Relena looked at him with such pain in her eyes but a little sign of love was their. She pulled away shaking her head. Heero reached for her but she jumped back. "Relena...please.." he said with pleading eyes. She shook her head and ran off into the direction of the road. Heero ran after her.
Relena breathed heavily as she ran. 'No, I will not allow myself to
be hurt again. No never.' she thought as she ran.
A.N: I left you at a cliff hanger. I am so evil. I would like it if
you would R&R!!!! ^_^ i know it's not that good but it's my first shot
at a fanfic...well sorta