Disclaimer:
The good stuff is JKR's. The shit is mine.Summary:
I'm an idiot. That's why I wrote this. My overactive imagination went wild during Economics a few months ago…and a friend begged me to post this. So here it is.Kiss Your Arse Goodbye
Hermione had had enough. George was in one of those moods again. She was sitting next her boyfriend Ron, George's younger brother. The twins, Fred and George always teased them. Today was no different. George was trying to play footsie with Hermione and was making "goo-goo eyes" at her. She and Ron were glaring at him. She had had enough of their pranks and jokes involving she and Ron. The latest creation was a spell that gave the victim of the hex explosive diarrhea. She rolled her eyes at the thought. She stood up quickly and stared George down when he blew her a kiss from across the table. George merely laughed as he raised his wand to cast his new spell on Ron. Ron would be humiliated! Hermione had to think quickly. Aiming at Ron, she cast a rebounding curse to prevent him from being harmed by George's hex.
"George, put your head in between your knees and kiss your arse goodbye!" she screeched. George froze when the cursed rebounded off Ron. He thought it had hit him, when suddenly Neville shot up into the air. Watery, brown. smelly goop was spraying all over George. Hermione laughed as everyone leaped to get out of the way.
George looked at himself and gagged. "I think I'll just go take a bath." Hermione nodded with a wrinkled nose.
After George had left, Ron nuzzled his face into Hermione's neck. Maybe he would ask her to go to the common room a little earlier tonight…to celebrate…since she had saved the day and all.