Each success only buys an admission ticket to a more difficult problem- Henry Kissinger
Pausing outside the classroom, Severus placed his fingertips against the cool dark wood. He rested his forehead lightly on the door. He could hear them on he other side; laughing and chattering, continuing on as if nothing had happened. Uncaring bastards.
His face a mask of cold marble, Severus gripped the handle and flung the door open. The students quieted, the stillness ruffling his heightened edginess. Without looking at them, not daring to glimpse at that spot, he sat down, his eyes focused on a stone paperweight.
"Begin brewing," he barked, waving his wand over his shoulder. "Instructions are on the board. I do not want to hear one sound except for the grinding of pestles."
There. He had made it thus far. There would be no moving around the room in this class, he would not be slinking behind students, causing them to jump when he spoke silkily into their ear, berating their feeble attempts of potion brewing. For today, if he should happen to see him, the person for whom a boiling hatred was bubbling within, Severus would not be for responsible for the outcome.
The rustle of robes, the whack, whack of knives cutting up roots, the faint sniff or cough of a student with a cold, were the only sounds in the room. Ten minutes, fifteen, thirty, he just may survive without committing murder if he didn't have to look up. Severus knew the death bell had tolled when that blasted Witch spoke.
"Professor."
What is it, Miss Patil?" he snapped, keeping his eyes focused on the parchment in front of him.
"Er, Professor, are you sure that the second stage is written correctly? Shouldn't we boil for five minutes, not three?"
How dare she question him. It wasn't her place to do so. It was hers…
Unconsciously, he lifted his head, his eyes going directly to her table.
Empty.
The empty chair stood there, mocking him, taunting him.
It was too late to stop as his eyes flickered to the seat beside the empty chair. Cold fire shot from Severus' eyes as he stared into a pair of brilliant green ones.
Abruptly he stood, the chair falling to the floor with a clatter. His fingers twitched as he grasped the ebony shaft in his pocket.
Do it, just one quick spell and it will all be over.
Green and black clashed, anger, pain, accusation, flashed in their eyes as they
stared each other down.
Lifting his wand Severus he blasted his desk
apart. Somewhere someone screamed. Turning on his heel he left the room in a
billow of black.
"Severus. We need to talk."
"I am done talking old man," he snarled, flinging the last of his belongings into the trunk. With a quick spell the trunk shrunk to the size of an envelope.
"This is nonsense. You scared the students half to death with your little temper tantrum."
Severus brushed by Dumbledore, a nerve ticking in his cheek. Of the things he hated most in the world right now, Dumbledore was second on the list.
A snarl of pure venom escaped his lips when he felt Dumbledore's hand on his arm. "Release me." he spat.
"Where do you think you are going, Severus?" demanded Albus.
"Anywhere but here."
"You can't just walk out..."
"Just watch me."
"Severus, if this about what happened that night, Miss Granger did what was best."
"Best?" His voice dangerous. "The inane death of a brilliant young woman was best?"
"I did not say that. However she understood her life was not as important to the cause, not like Harry's."
A vein stood out on his neck, his blood pounded in his ears drowning his hearing in a thick pool of blood. "That girl's life," he snarled through gritted teeth was worth more than a dozen Potter's."
"Really Severus. Don't be so unreasonable. Harry had to be protected no matter what the cost…"
"Damn Potter! Damn your cause!" Blinded with fury Severus had to get out of there quickly or he would tear the bastard from limb to limb. Pushing past Dumbledore he flung open the door with such force that it shook dust from the stones as it slammed into the wall.
"Severus! Stop this nonsense. Where are you going? What about the Order?"
Stopping, Severus did not look back as he spoke. "Fuck the Order, Albus and fuck you. As far as I am concerned you and it can go straight to hell." He was gone in a flurry of billowing robes.
Staring into the fire, Severus swirled the whiskey in the glass a moment before downing it in one gulp. Long shadows danced across the dirty, dilapidated room. His family home. A small townhouse in the heart of Manchester, hidden from the Muggle eyes by enchantments. The place had been vacant for over two decades now and was beginning to crumble. Never had he thought to return but one hellhole was as good as another.
Attempting to pour more whiskey into the glass, he dropped the bottle. It shattered on the floor, the amber liquid staining the moth eaten carpet. Shattered…just like she had been.
Putting his head in his hands, trying to block out that night, he moaned as the visions came back with alarming clarity…
Severus entered the kitchen at Grimmauld place. Molly stood up quickly and hurried to him followed by Ginny and Minerva.
"Are they safe?"
"I do not know," he said coldly, anger burning in his eyes. "Dumbledore forbade me from making an appearance, for obvious reasons."
"Damn fool children," Minerva muttered, her eyes bright with unshed tears.
Molly patted her hand. "They will be fine, just fine."
Severus turned his gaze on the youngest Weasley. "Did you know about this?"
Ginny flushed. "No."
Of course she didn't. She would have been right on their heels if she had.
He watched as Molly bustled about, cleaning things that were already spotless. Minerva was chatting with Ginny, no doubt trying to take her mind off things.
A clattering of footsteps upstairs announced the arrival of someone. They dashed up the stairs…
NOOOOOO!
Molly's wail echoed off the walls, causing the portrait of Mrs. Black to start. Pushing pass those gathered around Dumbledore, Bill and Lupin, Severus felt numb.
Let it be Potter…
No he was being clasped tightly by Tonks.
The Weasley boy…
The tall red head was being supported by his older brother. No. It wasn't her, it wasn't…
He saw the tangled brown mass of hair falling over Lupin's arm.
Hermione.
Looking away, Severus felt icy pain run through him. In a dream like slowness he saw Ginny sway, Arthur catching her before she fell. Minerva's head was now buried in Severus' shoulder and from far away someone was crying.
Hours later or so it seemed he heard Molly telling Remus to put the body…what body?…into the study. Hermione was only hurt, injured, terribly, horribly injured. Dumbledore was saying something about the Grangers, that he and Lupin would take her home.
"Severus?" Minerva looked at him, her eyes red and puffy, a tear lingering on her cheek.
"I want to speak to Potter." He must have said it with all the venom he had ever felt for Minerva stepped back her face pale with fear.
"Now is not the time," Albus said sharply.
"Now!" Severus shouted.
"I agree, Dumbledore," Arthur said sternly. "We need to know why they were at the church tonight."
Potter emerged, white faced and blood stained, from a corner where he had been hidden from view by the robes of those gathered around him. "It's my fault," he said in a tight voice. "Hermione's dead and it's my fault."
Albus stepped between Severus and Potter, his hand held out warningly.
"It is not your fault, Harry," Dumbledore said in a kind voice.
"But it is. I was the one who planned to go out tonight. She tried to talk me out of it. I just …wanted," Harry grimaced, unable or unwillingly to continue. Arthur gripped his shoulder.
"Get on with it," Severus growled.
Harry looked at Severus their gazes locked together. "I went there in hopes to talk with Sirius."
"Harry," Minerva said sternly. "What fool notion is this?"
"I had overheard that a Porta Saecula would be opened at the church tonight at midnight."
"You imbecile." Severus' voice was quiet and cold. "Porta Saeculas are but a myth. You led your friend to her death over a bloody myth."
"Severus." Albus looked at him coldly. "They are not a myth. However the only one in existence is hidden carefully away. Tell me Harry, where did you hear of this?"
Harry flushed and looked away from Dumbledore. "I overheard some girls in the library discussing them, how when the planets are aligned, and such, a Porta Saeculas opens and for five minutes or so and you are able to speak to last person who died you were close to."
Comprehension dawned on Severus. "And just who were these girls?"
"I don't remember…"
"Do not lie!"
"Fine. It was that Ravenclaw Prefect Joanne and…Pansy Parkinson."
"Did it not penetrate into that thick skull that they were feeding you information?" Severus sneered.
"They didn't know I was there."
"Of course they did you little imbecile. Do you believe that all Death Eater children are only in Slytherin?"
"That's enough Severus," Albus said sternly. "Harry has been through enough tonight."
Severus wanted to rip the concerned look Dumbledore was giving Potter off his face.
"How did Hermione die?" Minerva asked quietly.
Remus spoke up. "When the Order arrived at the church, Voldemort and his Death Eaters had the children trapped in a corner of the apse. I knew we couldn't reach them in time as Voldemort sent the Killing Curse at Harry. Hermione…stepped in front of him." His voice wavered. "She just smiled serenely as she fell."
Wrapping an arm around the older woman Remus laid his head on her shoulder.
Molly and Ginny emerged from the room. "She is ready…if anyone wants to say goodbye."
Standing in the hall, Severus felt removed as he watched those gathered go in. Several minutes they appeared sniffling and wiping their eyes. Everyone had gone in except for two. He and Dumbledore.
When the last person came out Dumbledore said calmly, "Remus, if you would be so kind as to gather Miss Granger. We need to return her to her parents."
"Yes," Remus said heavily, "I shall get her…"
Severus laid a hand on Lupin, their eyes meeting. Remus nodded and stepped aside to let him pass.
Crossing the room it seemed like meters to where she laid on the settee. Hermione.
He stared at her. The brown curly hair had been carefully brushed until it shone. Molly no doubt. She looked as if she only slept, a princess in a fairy tale, under an enchanted curse.
So young, so much to offer. Breathing shallowly, he touched her hand. Cold, like his heart.
He had meant to tell her, had planned it all out. It had taken him months to realize that he fancied her. His stubbornness had refused to let him believe that he truly looked forward to her presence in his class, that it was only suspicion that caused his eyes to seek her out during meals.
His plan was perfect. After she had graduated, after the bloody war was over, he would approach her. Ask her to tea. If her reactions were favorable then he would mention that he would like to see her again, to court her. Old worldly as the word seemed, it represented something civil to him. And she deserved no less. Now she would never know, he would never know if there could have been something there. All because of Potter.
Hatred like he had never felt, not even when Black had almost arranged his death at Lupin's hands, filled his soul. And then there was nothing. Emptiness flooded over him and he plummeted into its depths.
Pulling his cloak tighter against the cold January wind, Severus stayed in the shadows walking swiftly, his head down. In his pocket jingled his life's savings, such as they were. He didn't care, nothing mattered except the glimmer of hope he had in his heart. Looking covertly around the narrow street, confident no one was aware of his presence, he rapped twice on the hidden door in the alleyway. The door opened with a creak and the smell of stale air permeated his nostrils. Stepping in quickly, the door closed behind him with a soft thud. His eyes adjusted to the darkness, the only light in the room was the faint ribbon coming from under the door.
"Snape, it has been a long time."
A hunched old woman approached him, leaning heavily on a cane.
"I have need of an item." Severus said quietly, nose twitching as she drew nearer. Conflicting odors of lavender, smoke and urine radiated from the old witch.
"You desire to meddle in things already passed," she cackled softly. "I have seen the object you seek and must warn you."
Severus crossed his arms, his black eyes glittering dangerously.
"Things are better now than what they will become, you will see this."
"I have no use of your addled riddles, Helga," Severus snapped, his nerves thin. "How much?"
Unperturbed, the old crone, fumbled inside her robes, drawing out numerous chains and beds. "This is what you seek," she said, holding out a small pendant in the shape of an hourglass.
"It is."
A toothless grin crossed her face. "That bag in your pocket will suffice. The entire amount, no less."
"Done," he replied quickly. The money mattered little to him. Helga was renowned for demanding much darker payments than simple gold. He passed the bag to her, delicately picking up the Time Turner.
"Be warned, Severus Snape, there is always a higher cost."
Indubitably. Severus bowed slightly and Apparated.
In an alley near number 12 Grimmauld Place, Severus counted softly as he turned the little hourglass back and forth. The world around him stop spinning and he checked his watch. A quarter till eleven. If things went well he would be able to stop Potter from leaving the house.
Entering Grimmauld Place through a secret door known only to him, Lupin and Dumbledore, Severus crept up the back stairs. Hidden in the shadows of the hallway he waited, hoping to get Potter alone long enough to hex him. He would hide him in the attic and by the time the spell wore off the opportunity for the bugger to go would have passed.
Two figures appeared in the hall and he cursed silently as he saw Hermione and the Weasley boy.
"Don't be late, Hermione. Harry wants to leave in a half hour."
"Alright. I still think it's a bad idea but you are not going without me," Hermione said testily.
She entered a room and closed the door as Ron climbed the stairs and disappeared. It wasn't Potter but this would work. Silently Severus pushed opened the door to her bedroom. Hermione was sitting at small table writing. In one swift movement he lifted his wand and cast the stupefy charm on her.
Hermione slumped on the table, spilling the bottle of ink. Quickly he gathered her up and put her in bed, pulling the covers up to her shoulders. After casting a scourgify charm on the desk and turning down the lamp he withdrew into the cupboard to wait.
The door to the bedroom opened. "Hermione?" Two figures appeared in the door.
"She's asleep," said one in disbelief.
"Let's go. We can get there and back and she will never know," said the other, who Severus recognized as Potter.
Stepping out of the cupboard, Severus smiled. Perhaps he should go after them, after all they were headed for a trap. Let Dumbledore protect his precious Potter.
Satisfied that Hermione would be safe, he left the house the smile still lingering on his lips. In the alley once more, he pulled out the time turner. Daylight fled into darkness again and again, as snow fell, rain pelted and sun twinkled down as the days flew back to the present.
Preparing to Apparate to Hogwarts, Severus hesitated. Though he was sure all would be well perhaps it would be prudent to return to the townhouse. If the remnants of his whiskey were still there then something may have went wrong. He would proceed with caution once he assured himself he had not been at the Snape house.
Looking around, Severus realized that was indeed the Snape house although he was sure he had missed his spot when he had Apparated. The frowning face of his great grandfather Elucid Snape frowned at him from his portrait hung over the mantel. Gone was the ratty furniture and the worn rug. Now the furniture was elegant, fourteenth century French, the rug Egyptian wool. Before he could ponder the mystery, the door to the lounge opened and Lucius Malfoy entered.
"Severus, old friend," Lucius greeted him warmly. "Are you ready?" Lucius cocked an eyebrow, sniffing disdainfully as he eyed Severus before a sly grin crossed his face. "Teaching robes? Did I interrupt a little role play?" Lucius said smugly. "Perhaps the Professor is giving the student a bit of detention?"
Careful not to react in a suspicious way, Severus merely smiled slyly back at Lucius. What in the hell was he talking about?
A figure appeared in the open door. Only years of hiding his emotions saved Severus from a deadly mistake of letting his confusion show. Hermione Granger entered, her head bowed, her eyes on the floor, carrying a set of rich looking robes. She wore plain black robes, cut so low her breasts threatened to spill out. Around her neck she wore a thick black metal band inscribed with silver runes.
Severus had sent that choker before. The Dark lord had displayed a chest filled with them. They were to be placed upon the throats of slaves, slaves comprised of witches and wizards to serve his faithful once he came to power…
A knot formed in his stomach.
"Your robes are ready, sir," Hermione said demurely, not looking at him. Dazed Severus allowed her to remove his teaching robes and help him on with ones of richest velvet adorned with silver runes. Lucius smirked, his eyes feasting on Hermione's cleavage.
"You little Mudblood is quite fetching, Severus. When you tire of her, do pass her along."
Glaring at Malfoy, Severus picked up his cloak. "Shall we go," he growled.
The atrium of the Ministry was filled with people, familiar faces, and those he had not seen before. Gone was the golden fountain in the center of the room. A large black pillar stood in its place adorned with…
Severus felt his stomach turn over. Fixed to the pillar were heads, familiar heads. The most prominent was that of Potter's, flanked by Dumbledore's and Fudge's. Turning away from the gruesome site, he tried to focus on what Voldemort was saying.
Apparently there had been a success, capture of renegades that had been plaguing the new regime. His stomach lurched once again as he saw Lupin, Bill Weasley and Tonks being led in, chained and looking like they had been beaten severely.
"Looks like the last of Dumbledore's prized Order has met their match," Lucius chuckled, slapping Severus on the back. "Imagine the entire Wizarding world fell in fourteen days after the death of Potter. Had I known that was all it took I would have killed him the first time I met him, witnesses be damned.
"Indeed," Severus said slowly.
Lucius frowned. "You aren't looking so well. Surely you don't have feelings for this lot?"
Not daring to look at the three directly, he turned his head in their general direction. "Hardly. Good riddance to bad rubbish." Grimaced as he looked at Lucius. "I believe the fish I had earlier was tainted."
Laughing, Lucius gave him a knowing wink. "More likely you want to continue your little game with your slave. You really must share, Severus. Excuse me, but if I don't buy the Black wench for my wife, she will have my head."
Arriving back at the house, he snarled as he flung his cloak off his shoulders. Hermione entered the room, head still down. "Shall I bring you something to drink, sir?"
He frowned. Where were the questions, the constant annoyance? "No," he barked a little harsher than he intended. Merlin, he would never forget the scene at the Ministry. "I am going to retire." He needed time to think about this, this alternate world that he had created.
"Yes sir, I will turn the duvet down."
Climbing the steps he entered the Master bedroom. It looked nothing like his parent's room. The room was a mixture of dark mahogany wood, velvet and silver. Soft plush carpet softened his steps as he walked over to where Hermione stood. He wanted to talk with her, ask her what happened but was unable to speak as she began to disrobe him. With deftness she had him standing nude in a few minutes. Like most before him, Severus chose not to wear pants beneath his robes.
Still feeling queasy from the Ministry, Severus allowed himself to sink wearily onto the bed. "If that is all, sir." He heard the hint of fear in her voice but ignored it needing to talk to her.
"Stay," he commanded.
There was a rustle of movement and he looked up to see her disrobing. Her robes fell to the floor and she stood there naked. Despite the situation, Severus felt his body react to the nubile creature in front of him. Smooth white skin beckoned to be touch; the translucency of it was something that could be found only in youth. High small breasts with dark rose nipples, called for him to take them in his mouth as he eyed her body with appreciation.
Hermione climbed into the bed on the other side and lay back as if waiting.
Crawling over to her, he ran a hand up her side, enchanted by her beauty. Finding her lips, he kissed her, his tongue begging entrance. After a moment he realized it was like kissing a limp rag. Pulling away in frustration, he gazed down at her. Nothing. Her eyes were vacant, empty, defeated. What he done to this girl to break her spirit so in such a short time? His heart sunk trying not to think of debauchery he had always exhibited when it came to ripe young girls brought for the brethren's pleasure.
"Hermione, have I been an unkind master?"
"No, sir." Her reply was flat, just as her eyes that were avoiding his.
"Look at me," he said roughly, grabbing her chin and staring deeply into her eyes. He did not need his wand to extract the pain he saw there. The fear, the deaths of her friends, him laughing at her anger as he took her for the first time, or the many times that followed until the fire had died and the collar was placed around her neck.
"Tell me," he said softly, rubbing her cheek with one long finger.
"You have been kind….not asking me to call you master, allowing me to read your books," she sniffed, tears forming in the corner of her eyes.
"Go on," he urged, no longer caring about what had happened.
"I…I just want to go home. I know it's impossible, but I do." She put her face in her hands and wept.
"Ah, Hermione," he said gently, gathering her in his arms and rocking her as she sobbed pitifully. This was madness. She was alive and here in his arms yet there was no joy to be had. He knew what he had to do.
Waiting until she had cried herself to sleep, Severus gently laid her on the bed, pulling the covers up around her. "Goodbye, Hermione," he whispered, kissing her forehead, knowing it would be the last time he saw her alive.
Apparating once again to the alley near Headquarters, he cursed as he saw his other self already disappearing into Grimmauld Place. Following silently, Severus finally caught up to his double that was hovering outside Hermione's door.
"Stupefy," he whispered. Severus watched as the other Severus fell. Now to drag him into the secret passage…
The door to the bedroom flew open.
"What…Professor Snape!" Hermione was kneeling down next to his prone body, her wand in her hand, her eyes darting around. Holding his breath, Severus felt her eyes flicker over him.
"I'll be right back with help," she assured the other Severus.
In a flash she was racing down the stairs raising the alarm. Knowing he had to move quickly, Severus quickly levitated his body into the secret passage.
Outside in the alley, he wrote a note with his wand on a sheet of butcher paper lying rumbled in the dumpster. placing it in the hand of the stupefied Severus, he stepped behind the dumpster and pointed his wand at him.
"Ennervate".
Severus watched his double stir, look around groggily then read the paper clutched in his hand. The earlier Severus snarled and stuffed the note in his pocket before Apparating.
Sighing heavily, Severus waited for ten minutes before using the time turner once again.
"Severus."
Blood shot eyes opened slowly and squinted against the faint light coming from the fireplace. It took several minutes before he remembered where he was. Sitting in his old family home pissed after 24 hours of drinking.
"Severus, answer me."
Grimacing at the wool in his mouth, Severus spoke thickly. "Get out of here, Albus."
Dumbledore's head was hovering in the fireplace shaking back and forth. "Severus, I have never known you to pout, at least for very long, but enough is enough. You have had all weekend to fume about the little incident and I expect you here in ten minutes. If you are not at dinner, I will be forced to assign patrol to you for the next six weeks."
Little incident? He had left for good and he felt anger and bile rising in him at Albus' casual remark.
Trying to find his wand to blast the fireplace to dust, he slipped off the sofa and landed on his ass. Holding his head, for he knew it was about slide from his neck, Severus vaguely heard Dumbledore still speaking.
"I do not believe any student will be fool hardy enough to speak of the incident once you have returned. Miss Granger took care of that. She sealed the classroom and would not allow anyone to leave until the culprits confessed. I had the pleasure of giving Messrs. Malfoy and Zambini detention with Filch for a week."
Miss Granger? "What?" he asked dumbly.
"Miss Granger was a regular terror that day. The prank was meant for the females in the class but when your clothing completely dissolved and you ran from the class, it upset her greatly that a teacher, yes even you, would be subjected to such humiliation."
"Hermi…Miss Granger?"
"Yes, Miss Granger. Now Severus, I expect you here now. No one was harmed or at least not permanently from seeing you naked." With a pop Albus' head disappeared.
Not daring to believe what he was hearing, Severus walked into the kitchen and splashed water on his face. The house was still the same as he had first seen it. Ran down and filthy. Hermione was dead, Albus was lying…or was he. Pulling out the time turner he Apparated back into the alley once more, returning to that fateful night.
He waited until it was almost midnight then ventured into the house. Creeping up to the first floor, he paused outside Hermione's door and heard voices.
"I can't believe you did that!" Potter was yelling. "I missed my only chance because you thought you saw Snape."
"Don't yell at me Harry, I did see Professor Snape."
"You probably just used it as an excuse to keep me from going…"
Severus didn't need to hear anymore. Regardless if it had been a fluke or not, his original plan had succeeded.
Stopping at his rooms to shower and change first, Severus walked into the Great Hall as dinner was finishing. Ignoring the smirk Albus was giving him, he walked pass the Staff table and headed directly for the Gryffindor table where Hermione was seated.
"Miss Granger."
She turned and looked at him, her face flushing. "Professor."
Offering his hand to her, she looked puzzled, but placed her hand in his and stood. "I wanted to thank you for taking care of the small problem that occurred in the classroom Friday, Hermione." He hid his smile at her apparent shock that Professor Snape, the nastiest professor in school, would ever thank a student, especially a Gryffindor.
To the hell with what they thought of him. Leaning forward he brushed his lips on her cheek. Silence filled the Great Hall. Hermione blushed pink yet smiled warmly at him.
Standing tall, Severus walked proudly out. He planned on calling on Miss Granger in the next day or so, to ask her permission to court her, having confidence that she would agree. If Albus had a problem with the impropriety of a teacher courting a student, he would bloody well hex him six ways to Sunday. Now that he had another chance he would not waste time waiting.
Fini
AN/ Porta Saecula-loosely translated Gate to Eternity
MY assignment: You will be writing for: shiv5468Who wants: a happy ending evil!Dumbledore (well evilish)And doesn't want: no doormat Hermione who has been raped and abused andhas to be rescued;( I hope I satisfied this requirement as the abused Hermione did not really happen J) nothing a Britpicker would have kittens at (ie no american exchange students no Hermione moving to Chicago etc)