A/N: Something that just popped in my head this afternoon and I felt the need to write down. Sorry it's been a little while since I've been updating my Rizzles fics. Here's some Rizzles to hold you over :)
Jane had been acting strange lately, withdrawn.
Over the past couple of months, she had slowly started to come to Maura's house less, then their conversations at work started to lean more towards the professional side. Maura had a lot more time to see Jack now that she was barely pending time with Jane, and she didn't think that Jane wanted to hear about the time she and Jack shared (she derived this theory from the way Jane's brows furrowed and her body tensed when Maura spoke of Jack, or the way Jane sometimes even made an excuse to leave the room). So, Maura didn't know what to say in the way of personal conversations. Anything she joked about in the past with Jane, even her scientific rants which tended to make Jane laugh…nothing worked.
She couldn't seem to get Jane to open up no matter how hard she tried. Tactics which had been successful in the past had all failed. Maybe because this time, Jane was upset with Maura. Perhaps, it was because there wasn't some outside obstacle Maura could help Jane face—the problem was her.
Even the Rizzoli family was quieter around Maura. One night Frankie had called her saying Jane had drank a lot and he wanted to check if she was okay. Maura was shocked. Heavy drinking wasn't like Jane. She told him she'd come over to Jane's, but he said it'd be faster if he just described her symptoms and she could tell him if he needed medical attention or not.
Maura talked to him while she got in her car to head towards Jane's apartment, not thinking about anything but Jane's well-being. But Jane had gotten on the phone after Maura had determined Jane was probably alright and had told Maura not to come.
"Please, don't. You can't see me like this."
Maura warred with herself about it, but Jane's voice sounded so small, so pleading. So she listened. She didn't go check on her best friend.
Maura shivered and pushed these negative thoughts to the back of her mind, as she stood up from her desk chair and pulled on her down jacket. This is just where her thoughts went when she let her brain wander, when she didn't have her sounding board. Jack listened to Maura, but she couldn't talk to him, open up about her problems, like she could with Jane.
She missed her best friend. But maybe her best friend didn't feel the same way about her anymore. Maybe she wasn't needed. Again.
God. When would she learn.
Maura frustratingly dabbed at the wetness gathering in her left eye and hit the button to dial Jack's phone. She needed Jane. But that wasn't an option. She needed not to think so much. And when Jack picked up and said hello she had something else to focus on.
She got the call at 9:36pm. Jack was busy roaming his hands all over her, finding places that made her heart speed up. When her phone rang, she meant to switch it off, but then she saw that the call was from Jane's number. She pushed back from Jack suddenly and sat up on the couch, trying to catch her breath.
"Jane."
"Maur," almost like a sigh.
"Jane?" It barely sounded like her. But no one else called her Maur, not in that way.
"I just…um…what are you doing?"
Maura hesitated to answer, then decided to leave out the Jack part.
"Nothing really. Just having a relaxing evening."
"Oh."
Silence. Maura was about to speak when Jane chimed in, her breath sounding unusually fast.
"Remember that time we went to the beach for a week?"
"Of course," Maura said, surprised.
"We stayed in that little shack by the sea that's been in my family for generations. I thought you'd hate it." Here, Jane gave a breathy laugh.
"I loved it," Maura said, quietly, forgetting completely that Jack was in the room.
Just remembering the peacefulness of the place, the way Jane would sit out on the porch in the mornings, coffee in hand. Jane was only a morning person at the beach. Maura had never seen her so relaxed. It was nice sharing that space with just Jane. She had loved the starry nights and the long talks over homemade dinners.
"You taught me how to dance," Jane said.
Maura laughed at the memory of Jane doing the tango with her around the tiny kitchen at the beach house. Jane was clumsy with her long legs, but Maura caught her every time, and she got the hang of it eventually.
"You became an expert."
"Mmmm, no that's always you. You're the expert. The dumbest genius I know." Jane sounded farther away, her voice sounded similar to her when she got very tired.
"Where are you, Jane? Have you been drinking?" Maura furrowed her brow.
Jane chuckled, almost bitterly. "Now, a drink would be nice. As for where I am, hell would be a good description."
She groaned a little, but it sounded far away.
"Jane, are you alright?" Maura was growing concerned, sweet memories of the beach falling away, replaced by dark images of Jane lost or hurt somewhere.
"Nope. My body is not too happy with me. Took another shot to the stomach."
Maura stood up and had her shoes on, before the startled "what" even escaped her throat.
"Jane, do not joke about this."
"No, Maura it hurts. Not gonna joke about this kind of pain."
She could hear Jack's voice far off in the difference, but her only focus was on Jane and getting to her car.
"Why didn't you tell me—why—where are you? Jane where are you, I'm coming."
She was already starting the car, backing down her driveway faster than she ever had.
"It's okay, Maur. Ambulance and the calvary are both on the way. Just wanted to hear your voice."
Maura melted a little at this, but tried to focus on driving.
"I'm right here, Jane." She tried to make her panicked voice sound smooth, assuring. "Right here. Tell me where you are."
"This old, falling apart house—246 Easton Street. Followed a lead there. Found the kid. Got him out before the asshole shot me."
"The Forge case? You found the missing boy?"
They had been working this case for weeks. Many dead 13 year old boys—tragic. They'd honed in on a suspect—Forge—and it seems Jane had found him with an intended victim, who she'd saved, while getting herself shot in the process. Stupidly not having back-up. She'd been often reckless lately, more so than usual. Maura internally scolded herself for not paying more attention to Jane and her whereabouts today.
"Yea. He's safe. I directed him out of this fucking place."
"Get yourself out!" Maura panicked, then tried to calm her breathing.
"I just can't walk anymore, Maura. It's so—"
"How badly are you bleeding?"
"Bad."
For Jane to sound this defeated…for her to say something was bad….something was really wrong. Maura felt herself chilled to the bone.
"You tried to stop the bleeding?"
"Tore my shirt apart to make a bandage and apply pressure. Did what I could."
Maura had a sudden horrifying vision of Jane bleeding out in a dirty house, Forge lurking in the shadows to pick her off.
"Where's Forge?"
"Dead."
Maura breathed a sigh of relief. "Good."
"You know my shooting is incredible, Maur. Remember that time I tried to teach you how to shoot?"
"Yes, but Jane—"
"I want to talk to you, Maur. You're my call. You're my call, okay? I want to think about you and I just—I don't know, I don't want to think about the fact that I'm bleeding out everywhere."
Maura feels the tears coming, the panic rising, and forces them down, down, down—speeds through a red light.
"The christmas tree."
"Hmm?" Jane sounds like she's falling asleep. Maura will do anything to keep her awake, keep her talking. She desperately hangs onto what she has.
"The christmas tree two years ago that we spent all night decorating."
"Yeah, because you didn't get home from work until 1AM." Jane sounds more like herself, her voice hinting at laughter.
"I told you to start decorating, but you waited for me."
"Because it was your first tree, the first time you were decorating. I wasn't going to take that away from you."
Maura laughs a little. "We ended up sleeping under the tree, remember?"
"Yeah, I hung up that last ornament near the floor and then I was just out." Silence. "You could've slept in your own bed you know."
"No, that's—no, I couldn't have." Maura says quietly.
She glances at her GPS. 3 minutes until she reaches the destination. Her attention shifts back to Jane when she hears loud coughing.
"Jane?"
"Yeah, sorry about that."
"What's going on?"
"Nothing. Tell me a story, Maur."
Maura fights the urge to find out this knowledge. She must let it go.
"A story of you and me?"
"Yes."
"Okay. The night you came to the art dinner my mother was hosting. You didn't want to go, but you came anyway. And I made you wear that dress that looks lovely on you. I could tell you were uncomfortable and totally out of your element…but then you saw me drowning amongst my mother's friends, that crowd of people. You noticed me floundering, feeling terribly uncomfortable, though I had a smile on my face and was fooling everyone else. You swooped in and saved me from the way they were picking me apart. And we spent the night in our own corner of the table laughing and ignoring everyone. I never felt so…"
More coughing and a cry of pain.
"Jane? Jane!" Maura screamed into the phone, as she turned the corner.
And there was the building. On fire.
Maura burst from the car, running up to the nearest cop.
"She's inside, Jane, Jane Rizzoli. She's still inside!"
"I know, Dr. Isles, we're doing what we can to get her out."
She turned to the firemen, huddled in a bunch, some looking around the building hurriedly, some spraying water haphazardly on it, but most not moving.
"What are they doing then?"
She stalked towards the helmeted crowd. "What are you all doing?"
"Ma'am, stand back," said a tall man, reaching for her arm to pull her in the other direction, away from Jane.
"No, I am the Chief Medical Examiner of Massachusetts and you will talk to me! Tell me what's happening, what's your plan to get Detective Rizzoli out."
The man took a deep breath, as if Maura was a little child he had to pacify.
"We're attempting to find a safe way in, however, the house is old, falling apart easily," he spoke slowly, cautiously. "It may be hard to—get in there and get her."
"Well, you're not going to do it standing around!"
Maura, Maura— Jane's voice sounding far away. Her phone.
Phone back up to her ear Maura shouts, "I'm here, Jane, I'm at the building!"
"I know. And they can't come for me. It's okay. I'm dying, anyway. No one should waste their—"
There are harsh coughing sounds.
"—life on me."
"You stop that, Jane Rizzoli. Right now. Your life is very valuable. You are important."
"No one—no one needs me," Jane's voice sounds strained, tired.
Maura can't stand to hear this.
"I need you! I need you, Jane. I—"
She turns to the fireman with tears in her eyes.
"Please go in there. Please try."
"It doesn't make sense, ma'am. We've tried five different ways. We can't. I'm sorry, we—"
Maura runs to a fireman still circling the building between the firemen aiming hoses at the flaming mess. It seems futile.
"Can you get in?"
"Doesn't appear that way, ma'am," the man says, his eyes sad.
"I'm going in."
"What?"
"Where's the best possible entrance, I'm going in."
Maura, Maura? What are you doing, Maura, what are you—
"I'm coming Jane, hang in there, you hear me?" Maura then hits end, although she feels something snap in her heart when she does it.
"Ma'am, you can't go in—"
"I'm the chief medical examiner of Massachusetts. My best friend is in there, and the best detective this city has ever seen. I'm going in if you're not."
He studies Maura for ten seconds, but it seems like an eternity. His suit is off and she is stepping into it, his hat is on her head, she doesn't think, she just breathes. He points to an opening, she trenches through.
The darkness, the smoke, the heat. Jane was right. This is how she would imagine Hell to be. But Maura keeps going, because she has Jane to find, Jane to get out of here.
"Jane!" she tries to call out.
She finally hears muffling shouts and crawls through the rubble towards the sound, delicately stepping over debris. She won't die now, just before reaching Jane.
A hand reaches out—Jane's hand she'd recognize it anywhere—and Maura grabs it firmly.
Jane's face emerges out of the smoke.
"Maura, go, please go. You need to leave now, you can't get me out of here, you won't survive."
"No."
"Leave!" Tears are rolling down Jane's sooted cheeks, eyes pleading.
"No, Jane. I need you, remember."
Jane hangs onto her hand tighter then. She pulls Jane up, one arm fully around Jane's waist. With Jane grasping onto her tightly, they start to stumble, trying to find the light, any light that is not bright, bright, red, orange, hot flames.
Just when Maura is sure she sees an exit, Jane starts to slump.
"No, Jane, just a little longer, it's okay, you're okay."
"I. Can't."
Jane doubles over in pain.
"We're almost there," Maura blinks past her tears. "Honey, we're almost there."
She pulls Jane up by her elbows, straining a little under the weight.
"Jane, walk towards me."
"Maura."
"Eyes on me." And Maura walks backwards. Jane's eyes finally focus on Maura's and she takes a step forward, following her. Following Maura like she needs to. Like despite the pain, she has no choice.
When they are out of the building, Jane collapses forward into Maura's arms and Maura doesn't let go. Arms wound tight around Jane's waist, stifling the blood flow, pulling Jane's weight, Maura carries her through.
Firemen stumble over to help, looking shocked. They pull Jane away from the building just before the main foundation collapses into the mouth of the flames.
The cop cars, Frankie, Korsak and Frost, the ride to the hospital-it is all a blur to Maura.
Except the kiss.
On the way to the hospital, the ambulance hits a bump. Maura leans even further over Jane, and Jane catches her lips. And they are kissing, just like that.
Right away Maura is falling.
She realizes she has been for quite some time.
I would really love to hear your thoughts. Thank you