(Author's Note: Sorry, school has prevented me from updating The First Time but I couldn't let readers languish without something new! In case you're wondering, yes, this was inspired by an Axe commercial, that I just HAD to have fun with. I always figured Cloud would do something like this anyway. Enjoy!)

Laundry

It was one of those moments those 'performance enhancement' commercials are always yammering about. You know the kind - 'an ordinary moment may turn romantic at any time' kind of crap, all narrated in a fruity announcer's voice. A single touch over a laundry basket inspiring a moment of romance and passion. That kind of drivel that happens only in teenage fantasies.

Tifa always scoffed at these commercials. Not once in her long relationship with Cloud had he ever given her that look, the look that said, "Let's go upstairs for a while," when she was doing chores. This was mostly due to the fact that Cloud had a unique talent for making himself incredibly scarce when chores had to be done. He was there whenever you needed a sword arm, but when the floor needed sweeping? Nooooo, he was gone on that bike of his faster than she could say chocobo.

Spontaneous romance her ass. Chores were just about as erotic as watching someone fish.

So it was that when she discovered there was actually a grain of truth to those commercials, she was totally unprepared for it.

She was walking down the hall with - as irony would have it - a full basket of fresh laundry under one arm, heading toward the bedroom to fold it. It was midday - the kids were at school, the bar was closed for renovations, and the day was about as dull as it could get. This was the third load of laundry she'd done today and she was on automatic now. Her brain had switched off and gone to autopilot, letting herself drift deep in thought on chores yet to be done.

Thus she hardly noticed Cloud about to pass her in the hallway. When he grabbed her arm, she looked up at him blankly, her mind still occupied with balancing the checkbook.

All thoughts of chores went flying out of her mind when Cloud gently pushed her against the wall and stole her breath with an incredibly passionate kiss.

Her eyes widened and she stared at him when he finally allowed her to breathe. Smirking, he bent to kiss her again and Tifa let the basket slowly droop in her hand, then fall to the floor, tumbling socks everywhere, too absorbed in the wonderful things his mouth was doing to hers.

Distantly, she was aware of her arms twining around his neck and bringing him closer, and she eagerly returned the long, lingering kisses. She felt herself getting warm as he gently worked her blood up to a fever pitch. She wanted him in ways indescribable, but he only smiled that damnably quiet smile of his and ignored the demand in her kisses, going at his own pace. She happily lost herself in his intimate address.

Suddenly, the phone rang. Cloud's phone.

She saw only a glimmer of glowing mako eyes before they closed again and he worked his way down her jaw and to her throat. Tifa moaned and tightened her grip on him, hoping the caller would give up.

Whoever it was on the other end only kept calling every time the phone went to message. It was definitely killing the mood. What in the hell had possessed Cloud to set his ringtone to the chocobo song, of all tunes!

Finally, Tifa's hand fumbled to his pocket, which wasn't a very great distance from where her hand had already been resting on him. She'd almost withdrawn the phone but lost her grip on it when Cloud suddenly nibbled on her left ear. She had to grapple with it again and felt Cloud chuckle deep in his chest as she nearly tore his pocket by wrenching the phone out.

Opening the phone, she brought the mouthpiece near her over Cloud's shoulder. "Cloud is busy," she purred. Her voice must've held more sensuality than she realized because the person on the other end spluttered in shock. "Stop calling."

Flipping the phone shut, she dropped it in the laundry basket. Cloud drew away slightly and for a moment it looked as though he were going to end this little session to attend to the phone call.

Like hell.

Grabbing him by the front of his shirt, she pulled him close. "And you!" She kissed him fiercely. "If you stop, I'm gonna kill you."

Smiling, he obeyed.