A/n: I don't own, so don't sue me, you guys all know the drill.
Just a little thing I wrote while trying to make a playlist. I decided there really aren't enough SG-1 humor fics, for whatever reason or another. The title is the song I was listening to, by The Donnas, when I came up with this.
And yeah, some of it's retty weird. Set in mid to late season 9. It's meant to be silly and maybe kinda stupid. Hope you like it!
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"Daniel knows. Of course Daniel knows, Daniel knows everything,"
He'd snickered when he'd heard Sam all but shout that into the phone receiver in her lab. Of course, she wasn't worried about anyone over hearing, it was well past 2200 hours.
When exactly had he started thinking in military time?
"Oh, fer cryin' loud, Daniel!" oops, "don't just stand outside my lab! Come in and say hi to your friend or go...someplace else."
"I'll let you know I'm not offended," Sam stuck her tongue out at him as he took the phone, when the hell had that started? Had to be Area 51 he figured, but stuck his tongue out back just the same, "very nice Sam, very grown up."
"I told her to stop doing that, really,"
"I'm sure you did Jack,"
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For being all-knowing, he didn't remember when Sam started watching The Simpsons, or when her really cool chess set had been replaced with one of the said Simpsons variety.
He also didn't know when she had gotten so good at basketball that she was even beating Teal'c. It wasn't just basketball, either. Baseball, hockey, and almost two-hand touch football. The only reason she hadn't beaten him then was because when he touched her, he'd grabbed her and begun to tickle her, both laughing near hysterically.
Which was creepy. So very, very creepy. Seriously, Teal'c? Tickling Sam? It was just wrong on so many levels. Maybe they all needed a good psych evaluation. Soon, too.
At least Teal'c didn't seemed bothered by their friend's sudden talent for sports. Interest, whatever.
Does she even like sports? he wondered.
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He knew of course, that Jack wouldn't sell his truck. He just hadn't expected Sam to be driving it when he'd called her to take him to the ER after a shelf had collapsed on him.
What the hell?
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The biggest change he'd noticed, was the iPod. When she was just lounging around, or working on her laptop, off base of course, or doing chores, there were little ear buds plugged into an tiny little device that was probably loud enough to render any one person deaf.
He'd thought it was Cassie's. It was a reasonable conclusion to jump to. She did have one, after all.
At least, he'd thought that until he'd shown up one Saturday morning, unannounced and with an entire self's worth of blue Jell-O because he knew she'd been kind of bummed lately.
The last thing Daniel'd ever really wanted to see was the woman he considered his little sister dancing around her kitchen with her eyes closed in a black spaghetti strap tank top, little blue camouflage boxer shorts and singing something that sounded suspiciously like Walk Like An Egyptian.
Oh Yeah.
Sam Carter was taking a backseat off hours to Sam Carter-O'Neill.
It was horrible.
Like a train wreck, even. Like little dead fluffy animals or something. For a man who could speak more than twenty languages, those were pretty lame.
But he couldn't look away. Especially not after she'd caught him watching her.
It was just too damn funny. Right up until that part where she'd backed into the stove and burned her hand a little, and even then, it was still pretty comical. Daniel was just smart enough to not say so out loud.
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Tell me what you think!