Person of Interest: The Beginning

A/N: This is the epilogue I wish had been at the end of the episode Return 0 (S05E13). After finishing the series for the first time last night, I'm heartbroken, and I can't stop crying.

Dedicated to John Reese, who was always there, from the beginning all the way to the very end. A good friend. May you rest in peace.

"When you find that one person who connects you to the world, you become someone different, someone better. When that person is taken from you, what do you become then?" - John Reese, Pilot (S01E01).

She looked up at me, and we locked eyes. It felt like coming home after getting stuck in the worst storm of your life, all soaking wet and freezing cold, but knowing there was a warm fire, a blanket, and a cup of tea waiting for you. But when you turn back to check on the dear friend who had helped you to safety, you find they never made it home from the storm. They're gone. And you will never see them again.

Her eyes went wide and she covered her mouth with her hands. I took a step toward her, stumbled, and caught myself on a nearby bench, falling gracelessly onto it. I didn't know how to go on after everything that had happened. I wasn't the one who was supposed to be here. But I couldn't go back and change anything, no matter how much my heart ached to do so. I could only hope that Grace might offer me the comfort I needed in my grief, though I had no right to it after the way I'd left her so long ago.

"Oh my gosh, are you all right?" She was kneeling in front of me, looking up into my face, Hope etched into her features. The scent of her lavender shampoo wafted up and brought back memories of a time before all this. Before everything had changed. Before innocence was lost. Before John.

I thought about how to answer her. "I'm fine," was quick to my lips, but a sudden vision of that rooftop, the last time I'd seen John alive, talked to him... the words caught in my throat. Died.

"No," I croaked out, my throat tight. "I'm not."

"What's wrong? What do you need?"

I wanted to cry, to vomit, and to hold her close, all at the same time. It was then I realized she wasn't questioning my presence, just accepting it, like she'd been expecting me to show up. That alone, was the most comforting thing she could have done.

"I have a story to tell you," I said, my voice unsure and squeaking. "But it's not a happy one and it's quite long."

"Harold, I always knew you weren't dead. I knew you'd come back to me when you were ready. You don't have to tell me where you've been. I'll understand if you don't."

"No." I needed to be firm on this. She'd convinced me not to tell her what I was doing before. This time, I couldn't back down. "I need to tell you what happened, how I lost several dear friends, and how we tried to save the world, one person at a time."

She moved to sit beside me, took both of my hands in hers and held them there, warm, comforting, safe. People were passing by, thankfully ignoring us. Somewhere in the distance a dog barked and I thought of Bear.

"I need to tell our story to the world. That's my job now. Letting people know what we did, what really happened. If I can do this, maybe I can somehow prevent it from happening again. And I'm starting with you. You're probably not going to want to believe me. Hell, you might even think I'm insane. Some days I wonder about that myself. But I need to get this off my chest and..."

"Harold, I had a feeling you were doing great things. A man like you could never be mundane. Should I get you some tea? Will that help?"

My hands were trembling now, even as she continued to hold them in hers. I never wanted her to let go.

"Let me just begin... at the beginning..."

"OK."

"Five years ago I hired a man named John Reese. And in many ways, I feel that's where the story really starts. With John. From everything I knew about him, I knew he'd be a great employee, I just didn't realize what a good friend he would turn out to be."

I took a deep, shuddering breath. "I buried him yesterday morning."

My eyes blurred. "But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me explain something first. Let me explain what I did to cause this chain of events. You probably don't realize this but you are being watched. The government has a secret system: a machine that spies on you every hour of every day. I know, because I built it..."

"When you came to me, you gave me a job, a purpose. At first... well, I've been trying to save the world for so long that saving one life at a time seemed anticlimactic. But then I realized that sometimes one life - if it's the right life - that's enough. Goodbye, Harold." - John Reese, Return 0 (S05E13).

A/N: There were two things that bothered me about the ending of this episode. The first was that I needed to know Harold told Grace everything that had happened. That he didn't just go on living a normal life as if nothing had happened, as if John, Joss, Root, and the others hadn't existed. The second was that Harold's purpose was gone. He needed a new job.

I also liked the idea that the whole show is actually Harold telling Grace what happened. I feel like that's something that could have been happening all along, and we wouldn't know it until the end.

Anyway, I haven't written fan fiction in almost nine years! No other show has captured me recently the way POI has, and I am grateful that this show, these characters, could bring back my love of writing as much as they have. This show has been very inspiring on so many different levels.

I currently have several other pieces of fan fiction for POI in the works, Rinch based, though I don't know when they will be finished.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate any comments, thoughts, questions, anything you would like to share.