Everything Changes
By: maniackid
Summary: A songfic about Carter receiving a letter from Kem about her feelings for loosing their child. The song is what the letter says.
Disclaimer: I am not getting any money from this and none of the characters are my own. The song is not mine it belongs to Marcus Fagervall who won Swedish Idol 2007.
It is morning and Carter is sitting by his dining table drinking coffee and just when he is taking a sip from the steaming cup he hears the doorbell ringing. He sighs and gets off the chair to go open the door. As he opens the door he sees that it is a special delivery from Africa and his first thought is about Kem. He hasn't heard from her in over a year so he starts to remember both good and bad times and almost starts to cry. When he calms down he takes the pen and signs the receipt, then he closes the door and goes back to the dining table and sits down. He looks at the letter and can't decide if he should open it or not, he has tried so hard to forget her and is afraid that everything will come crashing down over him. But after awhile of pondering he gets to the conclusion that he has to know what it says so he takes the letter opener and takes it out from the envelope and starts to read.
Even though that I just meet you,
And we've only said hello.
I can tell that you are special,
Don't ask me how I know.
It may sound strange but,
To me it seems
You where always here
Living in my dreams
He starts to cry and all the feelings inside of him goes berserk. He remembers when they first met at the camp in Africa where he volunteered as a doctor for several months. He remembers when he first met Kem. It was a dark rainy night and he was standing at the porch when she walked out and asked how he was feeling, he looked into her brown eyes and just felt like looking at the most beautiful sunrise he could ever imagine. He smiles at the memory and starts to read again.
I can feel your love is in the air
Raise of sunshine everywhere.
Touching me forever and for always.
Angel eyes will look on me,
Telling me we were meant to be
Bringing back what I thought was gone,
Everything changes, from now on.
He remembers as they kissed the first time. She had had a bad day with her HIV project as one of the patients had passed on just a few minutes after she had said he would make it. He had talked to her telling her that it wasn't her fault, that she couldn't blame herself for things that she had no control over. She had tears in her eyes and told him that she felt like she had betrayed him as she couldn't keep her word. He had smiled sadly at her and without knowing what he was doing he kissed her lips and felt her kissing him back. They pulled apart and he instantly apologized for what happened. She smiled and told him to shut up as she kissed him again. He shakes his head to get back to the present and keeps reading.
Do you believe in magic,
Do you believe?
Falling at first sight
Life comes crashing in
I begin to realize
There's nowhere
For me to run to now
He falls into another memory of when he knew he was in love with her. He had been happy for the last week without any real reason. The other doctors had been looking at him as if he was crazy, after all how could someone be happy as people died like flies around them? It wasn't until a woman walked up to him and told him she was happy that he had found love that he understood why he had had the happy feeling. His face lit up with realization and he had thanked the woman and then he ran to find Kem. He found her in a tent close to their little residence. He had rushed inside and insisted on talking to her. She had asked him what the rush was and gave him a demanding look. He smiled at her and took her hands into his and had told her that he loved her. She had tried to keep her angry gaze but failed and told him she loved him back. They had kissed deeply and then he had let her go back to work. He can't help but to feel the smile tugging at his lips as he reads the letter.
I can feel your love is in the air
Raise of sunshine everywhere.
Touching me forever and for always.
Angel eyes will look on me,
Telling me we were meant to be
Bringing back what I thought was gone,
Everything changes, from now on.
He lets another memory whisk his mind away, the day she told him she was pregnant. It was around Christmas time when she told him and he knew he had just gotten the best Christmas gift he could ever have received. One part of his mind kept thinking that maybe it was a bad idea but he wouldn't listen to that. He was in love and had the finances to support a baby and a future wife. The joy in his heart had kept growing as the child grew every day. He couldn't stop telling her that he loved both of them and told her to be careful. She always responded that she would be forever. He never really knew if she meant careful or in love with him. He gets back to the letter.
I believe in tomorrow
Let it go of yesterday
His mind sweeps him into the one memory that he didn't want to remember. The day the baby died. They had been so happy during their stay in Chicago and then everything was destroyed. The baby they had been so happy to get and to care for had been stolen out of their lives before its life ever begun. He had seen the raw pain in her eyes as the doctor had told her she had to give birth to the dead baby. He hated the fact that he couldn't help her, he was a doctor but now he was a parent without a baby. He could hardly contain his own grief and he didn't know if he could be strong enough to support them both. So he turned the other cheek and pretended that nothing had happened by dropping all his feelings and became emotionless. They had tried to make it as a couple for awhile but she couldn't bare the way he never showed her how he felt. So one day when he came back from work he opened the door and was met by an empty room. She had left without a sign to show him where she had gone. Back to the letter.
I can feel your love is in the air
Raise of sunshine everywhere.
Touching me forever and for always.
Angel eyes will look on me,
Telling me we were meant to be
Bringing back what I thought was gone,
Everything changes, from now on.
Her love in the letter has opened up his heart and he feels the love rising up in him yet again. He knows that it is against his better judgement but decides to go to her. He runs to pack some things and then he just leaves to once again try to feel the emotion he felt the first time they met.
The End!!
A/N: Hope you liked it please review. I might do a sequel depending on the reactions this receives.