James T. Kirk could not get warm. No matter what he tried; hot showers, hot baths, dressing in multiple layers, drinking hot liquids, huddling under quilts and blankets both natural and synthetic. He was chilled to the bone. When he had first awakened after the two weeks McCoy and the medical staff at Starfleet had spent struggling to get his radiation-damaged body to accept the transfusion of Khan's blood, Bones had told him there were no side effects.

Bones was wrong. Shortly after he regained consciousness, strange things had begun to happen. Headaches, dizziness, anxiety attacks, weird pains in his body, and now this constant chill. Some of it McCoy had been able to treat; curing a headache was easy enough, and there were both drugs and natural remedies to calm an anxiety attack. But the doctor was at a loss to understand why Jim was having all these symptoms.

"Dammit, Jim, it doesn't make any sense. You should be feeling fine. I can't find any reason for all these problems you're having."

Jim heaved a sigh. "Great. I gotta be honest, Bones. This is scaring the hell out of me. I mean, I can't function like this. How can I be captain of the Enterprise when I've got all this shit going on?"

McCoy refrained from telling his captain and friend that it had him a bit worried as well. Instead, he tried to reassure him. "It's only been a few weeks since you woke up. Let's give it time, OK? I'll keeping tryin' to figure out a cause for what's happening to you. Meanwhile, you have to keep a low profile. Rest, don't over exert yourself. I know you're bored out of your mind, I know this inertia is makin' you nuts but you have to give yourself time to heal completely. You hear me?"

Jim ran his hands through his hair and then looked at his friend. "Yeah, I hear you. It's not like I can really go out and party the night away in this condition. Besides, that whole scene doesn't hold the fascination it used to. And to be truthful, I think I get in my own way when I start worrying about how I'm feeling. That's when the anxiety starts building, and before I know it I'm a fucking basket case. I keep thinking, 'what if I'm like this forever? How am I gonna be able to resume my life?'"

McCoy had asked himself the same question. He did not, however, reveal this to Jim. "Call Spock and have him bring that 3D chess game over. You need to focus on something other than your current situation."

"3D chess. Man, that sounds like fun", Jim said with a tinge of sarcasm. "Can I keep doing my workouts?"

"Absolutely. You need to stay in shape. Just don't overdo it."

"I promise. Can I get outta here now?"

"Yeah, go on home. Call me if you need anything."

The various remedies and medications had worked, for the most part. He was still having episodes of anxiety, but the stuff Bones had prescribed kept it from getting out of control. The aches and pains had almost completely gone away. But just when he was starting to relax and feel like he was on the road to full recovery, the chill had hit him. And it wasn't letting up. Dressed in thermal trousers, three shirts and a jacket, he was heating water for tea when he heard his front door chime. He considered ignoring whoever was calling, but thought better of it. He left the kettle on the heating element and went to answer the door. It slid open to reveal his first officer and best friend.

"Spock! Come in", he said, trying not to let the Vulcan see his teeth chattering. "I'm making tea. You want some?" He stepped aside to let Spock into the apartment. His first officer walked past him and then turned back to face him.

"Tea is agreeable. If I may inquire, why are you dressed in such warm clothing? The temperature in your apartment is several degrees above what you would normally find comfortable. I also observe that your teeth are chattering. Are you running a fever?"

Can't fool this guy. He's far too observant, and he knows me too well. "I'm having trouble getting warm. No matter what I try, I'm freezing. That's why I'm making tea, to see if I can take this chill off a bit."

"Have you notified Doctor McCoy about this? He may be able to provide you with a remedy..."

"Bones doesn't know why I keep having all these problems", Jim interrupted. "According to him, I should be feeling fine. I'm not fine, Spock. I'm all messed up." Just then he heard the kettle begin to whistle, and started toward the kitchen. Spock followed him.

"Define 'all messed up.'"

"Well, first it was the headaches", Jim said as he turned the heat off and poured the boiling water into a teapot to which he'd already added tea leaves. He put the lid on the pot and turned to face Spock. "Then I started getting anxiety attacks, and weird pains in my body. And now this fucking chill." He waited for Spock to admonish him for using an expletive, but this time the Vulcan merely frowned slightly. "How long has this been going on?" he asked.

"Off and on for the last two weeks. And yes, I went to see Bones, and he gave me some stuff that helped. I thought I was getting better when this chill hit." He opened a cupboard and took out two mugs, poured the tea and set the mugs on the table. He sat down across from Spock, picked up his mug of tea and wrapped his fingers around the hot ceramic surface, trying to warm his cold hands. He took a sip, grimaced when he felt the too-hot liquid burn his tongue, and set the mug on the table.

"I am curious. Why did you not contact me?"

Jim shrugged. "I didn't want to bother you. I know you've been supervising the refit of the Enterprise."

"All the same I would have preferred that you inform me of your condition. Perhaps I could have helped."

"Helped? How? You're not a doctor and I'm sure you have better things to do than play nurse to me." Jim had been staring into his mug. He looked up at Spock... and saw something in the other man's eyes. He felt a slight tightening in his chest. Spock looked... hurt. Not so anyone else would notice, of course, but he knew this Vulcan in a way that no one else did.

"I didn't mean to leave you out of the loop, I just knew you were busy and didn't want to bug you."

Spock frowned. "Why would you think I would be bothered by having you inform me of your condition? If our positions were reversed, would you be bothered if I contacted you to let you know I was not feeling well?"

"No, of course not. I'd want to know." Man, did I screw up here or what? "Spock, I'm sorry. You're right. I should have told you."

At that moment Jim shuddered and started shivering uncontrollably. His teeth were chattering so hard he feared they'd break against each other. He closed his eyes briefly, and when he opened them Spock was no longer sitting across from him. Alarmed, he looked around and saw his friend standing beside him.

"Get up", Spock said, not unkindly.

"Why? Are we going somewhere?" His feeble attempt at humor went unnoticed by his first officer.

"Jim, please. Get up."

"Okay, okay, jeez." He pushed his chair back and stood. Spock laid a hand on his back and started to guide him out of the kitchen. Kirk was confused but didn't object until he saw where the Vulcan was pushing him.

"What, you're gonna put me to bed?" He let out a mirthless chuckle. "Forget it. Being under the covers doesn't help. Look how many blankets are on the bed. I'm still freezing."

"This time we will add another element which may prove to be helpful in easing your chill."

"Yeah? And what would that be?"

"Me."

What did he just say? He did not just say what I think I heard...

"You?"

"My body temperature runs a few degrees above yours. If I join you under the blankets, perhaps I can help you get warm." Spock had removed his boots and was shedding his jacket and shirt. Clad now in just pants, socks and a t-shirt, he turned to find his friend staring open-mouthed at him. He raised an eyebrow at Jim and waited.

"You want me to get in bed with you? Are you serious?"

"It is a logical course of action given your condition. What is the problem?"

Good question, Jim thought. What was the problem? He trusted this man with his life. Spock was trying to help him. So what if they were both male? All apprehension suddenly fell away.

"I guess I should take off some of these clothes or your body heat will never get to me." He stripped off the layers until he was wearing the same thing his friend was. Still shivering uncontrollably, he climbed into the bed and waited. He didn't know what to expect from this 'logical course of action'. He only knew that he was freezing, and if the Vulcan's higher body temperature could help ease his bone-numbing chill, he'd lie in bed with him for as long as it took.

"Turn onto your left side." Spock said as he lay down beside him and pulled the blankets over them. Jim did as instructed. Spock put his arm around him and pulled him close, so that the length of their bodies were in contact. Jim started ever so slightly when he felt Spock's fingers touching his face.

"Mind meld?" he asked.

"Yes," his friend replied. "Quiet."

Jim closed his eyes. He expected to feel uncomfortable being this close to Spock, but to his wonder, he didn't. Perfectly spooned in his friend's embrace, he felt himself starting to relax, and then he realized that his teeth were no longer chattering and his violent shivering had stopped. He drew in a shuddering breath that was almost a sob as he felt the excruciating chill start to melt away. He let the breath out, sighing with a profound sense of relief at the blissful warmth he now felt. He had been so cold for so long. This felt like paradise.

"Oh my God, this feels so good."

"I am glad you are enjoying it. I must apologize for forgetting that heterosexual humans are sometimes uncomfortable being this close to someone of the same sex. I assure you there is nothing sexual about this. It is simply my attempt to help you. I trust that you understand this."

"I do. I was a little confused at first, but I trust you with my life. You're my best friend, Spock. I love you. I hope you know that."

Spock didn't answer. But they were still in contact through Spock's fingers, still in the mind meld he had initiated. And He heard what Spock couldn't say out loud.

"I love you too, Jim."

Jim struggled not to cry. The memory of Spock crying as he watched him die told him that the Vulcan cared very deeply for him. But to hear Spock say "I love you", even if he didn't speak it out loud, meant more to Jim than he could ever put into words. So he didn't try. Instead, he snuggled closer to Spock and fell asleep in his friend's arms.

xxx

Spock opened his eyes to the early morning sun filtering through the sheer drapes on Jim's bedroom window. Jim liked to leave the heavier ones open so that he could see the sun rising. But this morning, his friend was missing the pastel hues of pink, orange and blue in the Terran sky. Spock looked over at him. Jim had rolled onto his back and was sleeping deeply, his face serene, his chest rising and falling with a steady rhythm. Spock wanted to do a quick mind meld with his friend, but decided to wait until after certain bodily functions had been attended to. He rolled out of the bed gently and made his way to the bathroom.

Not long after, showered, shaved and dressed in clothes he kept in Jim's closet, he went into the kitchen and made a fresh pot of tea. Moving into the main room of the apartment, he drank his tea as he watched the sky grow brighter in the East. He mentally went down the list of things he had to do today. Most of them involved fitting the Enterprise with a new sensor array and installing equipment for stellar cartography. The Enterprise and her crew were preparing to embark on the first ever long-term mission. Five years in space, exploring as far into the galaxy as they could go. Spock was looking forward to this journey. As a science officer, exploration was what he was trained for. Such a mission required the Enterprise to be carrying the most sophisticated mapping and sensor equipment. Spock had helped to develop some of the computer programs needed to run the new hardware.

Spock was also looking forward to being Jim's first officer. When he thought about serving aboard the Enterprise, exploring the galaxy with his closest friend, he felt a sensation in his body that at first he didn't recognize. After allowing himself to experience it for a moment, he identified it as anticipation. Not only was he anticipating the mission, he was looking forward to taking the trip with Jim. So much had happened in the past few months, good and bad. The worst was losing Jim. The best was getting him back. He was aware of an intense desire to follow Jim Kirk wherever he went.

For now, they would be staying in San Francisco while the Enterprise was refitted and while Jim recovered. The start of the mission was still several months away. Spock drank the last of his tea, dropped off the mug in the kitchen and returned to the bedroom to check on his friend before leaving to go back to work on the ship.

Jim was still sleeping soundly, still lying on his back. Spock observed the blush of sleep on his friend's cheeks and the peaceful look on his face. The corners of Spock's mouth turned up ever so slightly, just a whisper of a smile. He was pleased to see that the work he had done the night before had been fruitful. He hoped that it would last. He placed his fingers very carefully on Jim's face and gently made contact with his mind. The surface was quiet and still like a lake on a windless day, but he could feel the stream of Jim's subconscious, the ebb and flow of his dreams, the rest and renewal taking place in the other man's body. Satisfied that for the moment, his friend was on the mend, he gently withdrew his mind and lifted his fingers from Jim's face. He left the apartment quietly, securing the front door behind him.