Ivan wouldn't expect Alfred to be sick let along have cancer. But here he was, holding a bouquet of sunflowers, he and Alfred's favorite flower, stepping into the dreary hospital room that Alfred is in.
There is Alfred, hooked up into various types of machines and tubes, lying on the hospital bed with his eyes closed shut. Ivan noticed that Alfred was considerably thinner than before, making his heart if it wasn't before, shatter into pieces. At that point, Ivan noticed that there was something wet coming from his eyes.
Oh, those was tears and he was crying.
He remembered just a few months ago, Alfred had complained about having multiple headaches. At that time, he and Alfred just shrugged it off as a normal sickness and that it would eventually go away. But that wasn't the case. It was only when Ivan found Alfred convulsing on the kitchen floor that finally prompted Ivan to rush him to the hospital. When the doctor told him that Alfred had stage four brain cancer and that it was too late to do surgery, Ivan's heart dropped and he cried hysterically.
As Ivan suddenly snapped out from his thoughts, he realized that visiting time was almost over. He quickly planted a kiss on Alfred's forehead and was preparing to go home when suddenly he heard the heart monitor going from a continuous beep to a long flat piercing sound that signaled Alfred's heart had stopped.He quickly pressed the emergency button that was beside Alfred's bed, hoping silently that this was just the heart monitor malfunctioning even through the chance of it is almost nonexistent. After a few seconds that seemed like eternity, the doctors and nurses had finally arrived. They immediately began to try to revive him. After again what seemed like an eternity, they were unable to revive him and pronounced him dead.
Ivan was in shock for a few minutes from the news and immediately begged the doctors to try reviving him again. But no matter how many times the doctors tried to revive him, Alfred's heart was still not beating.
Unable to believe that Alfred is gone forever, Ivan bursts into tears. "His precious sunflower couldn't possibly be dead, right?", he thought, hoping that this was just a cruel nightmare and that Alfred is still sleeping beside him, that everything is fine. But sadly, it wasn't a nightmare. It was real.
He deeply regretted not taking him to the doctor earlier so that Alfred's cancer could've been cured earlier and Alfred would still be here with him.
He cried and cried, kneeling at Alfred's bedside, holding his cold hand, desperately hoping that he would somehow wake up. Even when his sisters tried to pull him from the body so that the body could be sent to the morgue, he still wouldn't leave his side.
Ivan unable to get over his boyfriend's death, shot himself on his boyfriend's birthday, July 4th.