A/N: Since I've basically stopped writing my other story, I thought I'd do two one-shot songfics on two songs. The first one's Smitchie, and it's based on "The Way I Loved You" by Taylor Swift. (The next one'll be "The Way I Loved You" by Selena Gomez, and it'll be Naitlyn.) I know it's a ridicuously original title -cough- for a fanfic, but... what else am I supposed to call it?
Disclaimer: I don't own Camp Rock (Disney does) and I certainly don't own the song in italics, written by Ms. Taylor Swift.
smitchie – the way i loved you
based on the song "the way i loved you" by taylor swift
He called me yesterday. He said that he wants to see me again. Sure, it's been a year. Sure, he's the biggest popstar in the world. But can he keep the promise of forever and always?
It was the way I loved him.
he is sensible, and so incredible
and all my single friends are jealous
"Today," I whisper to the posters in my room. "He's coming today."
As always, the poster just stares right back at me with those empty light brown eyes. Of course it won't reply. It's a damn poster. Nothing like the real thing.
he says everything i need to hear
and it's like i couldn't ask for anything better
"Tomorrow night, dinner? With me?" he had asked me in his beautiful, melodic voice.
That was all I needed. "I'll be there," I promised.
he opens up my door and i get into his car
and he says,
"You look beautiful tonight." He smiles brilliantly at me, and I feel blinded by the perfectness of Shane Gray. What did I ever do to deserve him?
and i feel perfectly fine…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
but i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
and it's two am and i'm cursing your name
Still on the phone. Still crying. Still can't believe it.
Yes, it's two am. Yes, every one of my friends is completely fed up with me. But I can't believe it. Would I ever believe it? I miss him, I miss everything we did…
you're so in love that you act insane
and that's the way i loved you
His goofy smile, his craziness, his way of making the world seem like it was in a state of paranoia and yet having everything in his control. It was the way I depended on him for my jokes, my laughs, my love.
breaking down and coming undone
it's a rollercoaster kind of rush
I scream in my sleep, I cry, I bawl. I come down with a fever, I can't go to school. I don't want to go to school. He's no longer my reason to exist. I felt like I was a teddy bear, forgotten and coming apart at the seams with no one to fix it.
and i never knew i could feel that much
and that's the way i loved you
That was the way I loved him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
he respects my space, and never makes me wait
and he calls exactly when he says he will
I remember when he would hold me, call me, kiss me. I remember when he said my name, followed by those three words that were just too easily uttered.
"I love you."
he's close to my mother, talks business with my father
he's charming and endearing and i'm comfortable
He pulled me in with that charming smile, and I was comfortable. Too comfortable. Then he pulled the chair right out from underneath me and the comfort was gone – just the pain of landing that came after the numbness of falling.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
but i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
and it's two am and i'm cursing your name
Too late. Still crying. Still numb, yet still hurting.
you're so in love that you act insane
and that's the way i loved you
Insanity was what I lived for now. It was what my life was.
breaking down and coming undone
it's a rollercoaster kind of rush
I break down, I can't be fixed. I'm not a train, I'm a trainwreck. Blown to pieces.
and i never knew i could feel that much
and that's the way i loved you
That was the way I loved him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
he can't see the smile i'm faking, and my heart's not breaking
'cause i'm not feeling anything at all
The return to school has me in a cloud of numbness. I could barely hear, barely see, barely speak. It didn't hurt anymore. Actually, it didn't hurt. It was just numb. Cold. Empty.
Empty of everything.
and you were wild and crazy, just so frustrating, intoxicating,
complicated, got away by some mistake
and now I'm not sure what to do. He's left me forever falling into a deep dark abyss of heartbreak. I see him with someone else, and I wonder how he did get away. How did he ever want to break my heart?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
and it's two am and i'm cursing your name
It's two am, and I'm asleep. No more dreams of Shane and his perfect hair, of his beautiful eyes, of everything I ever wanted in a boy. All gone. Was I cured? No. Was I healed? Yes.
But healings still leave scars.
i'm so in love that i acted insane
and that's the way i loved you
That morning, you could hear the sounds of tearing paper in my room. I tore off his face, trying to leave Jason and Nate's intact. They didn't do anything to break my heart.
breaking down and coming undone
it's a rollercoaster kind of rush
And now the rollercoaster was over. I felt like a little kid who wouldn't cry about it, but would refuse to go on it again for a long, long time.
and i never knew i could feel that much
and that's the way i loved you
And that was the way I loved him.