Institutionalized

by LaoevanSVU

Sequel to the book Burn. What would have happened in Cameron had gone to a real mental asylum instead of that normal one? What would he have done in there? Would he have stayed sane? Rate & Review!

April 18th

It's been two years since I was admitted into this psychiatric hospital, or nut house, as they call it. Why was I sent here in the first place? Good question. It was because I killed someone. I didn't mean to, it's just that my rage got a bit out of control, and I wasn't thinking. Why did I kill him? Did he deserve it? No. But after a year of continuous abuse, I couldn't take it anymore! I snapped, and I killed a boy brutally, with an iron combination lock. I still have the scar in my hand from where the lock cut me. It hurts sometimes and leaves my hand feeling stiff. I think it is a small price to pay for what I did.

I wish there was something to do around here, sitting in this cell surrounded by lunatics. The sorry losers that I hang out with just lie around, doing absolutely nothing. They're slumped everywhere, bowing their heads, curled up in corners. I think they have no will left. I may not have any will left, because even I sit around, leaning against the wall and gazing out the barred, white window. They wouldn't even start a riot if I tried to inspire them to. That is something that I will look into…

April 19th

The memory of the fire that I caused, it's haunting me, and at the same time, bringing back beautiful feelings. It spread so quickly in the forest that I lit it, consuming everything. I wish I could light something on fire here. Some people call what I have pyromania (an obsession with fire), but I disagree with them. I'm not a maniac, so they shouldn't label me as one. I just see more beauty in a burning flame than other people, and the power it brings makes me dizzy with pleasure. I would do anything to smell smoke again, to feel my skin burn. There is no source of flames anywhere, save for the kitchen, but that is locked away. Everything is.

The people that run this place think that we are going to kill ourselves. They even locked up my dental floss because they think that I'm going to strangle myself with it! (Not that I use it). This is just like prison, but with white walls. The walls will probably turn red though, with all the suicides happening in here. I don't mind it though. We need the space. It's overcrowded, and I can't sleep on my most comfortable floor at night because of the wailing of all these crazies. They should all be quiet once in a while. You don't see me screaming… yet.

I HATE IT HERE! It's awful! I would do anything to escape. I rattle on the bars sometimes, to see where it would bring me, but nothing really happens, except that some people get really !#$%^ off, I mean, angry at me, and they tell me to stop or else they will rip my head off. Then I stop. It isn't wise to cause problems. On the bright side, that might make them riot. The ones that already haven't given up on themselves.

April 20th

Journal, I think I have a problem, but I can't really explain it. I keep hearing these…voices inside my head. I'm not evil, but they are the ones that came up with the suggestion to escape. I think that I'm trapped within my own mind! I do terrible things to myself if I don't listen. I hurt myself. I need to get out! This is why they call it a psych ward. I'M GOING CRAZY! I am glad that I have you, Journal. About the plan I was telling you about, it's coming to me. I know exactly what to do. This place is going to be destroyed when I'm finished. You have no idea. Wait and see Journal. I will get my revenge on these people!

You know what the good thing is though old pal? The voices are happy with me! Do you want to know why? I bet you do. If you don't, I'll tell you anyway! It's because my plan is falling into place. Yes, that's right Journal. I can finally be free! Today, while I was eating the gruel they serve us here, I met a friend. I bumped into him, and he shoved me! Do you know what that means? I can start the riot. That's the first thing I needed to accomplish on my list! Oh, did I forget to show it to you? Sorry. I'm a little preoccupied. I like to be organized with evil planning, because my voices, they like that. I kept it hidden from guards and other inspectors. How? I keep it on me at almost all the time, except when they do searches. Here it is:

April 21st

Journal, sorry! I got cut off from showing you my plan yesterday. You never did tell me if you liked it or not, so don't yell at me! The people, they did a surprise search of my cell. Anyway, do you think it is good? What? Oh, you liked it! That's a good thing! Do you know why? 'Cause I'm starting to suspect that one of these cellmates are on our side. I saw one of them taking a bribe. I am going to see if I can get anything to bribe him with. We could be friends! The best buddies ever! Too bad we won't be friends for long. When my plan is done, he's going to die. All of them are! THEY ARE ALL A BUNCH OF COWARDS! Oops, I screamed that. Now they think that I'm crazy! Well look who's staring. See, I just stuck out my tongue at them. Ha.

The people say that I'm going outside now. It's crowded there too. So to save time, I'm going to talk to that cellmate. Maybe I'll see what he'll take for a bribe. Bye Journal! I'll see you later! Stay in your hiding spot. You know, in the wall? Don't let anyone find you.

Later

I'm back, Journal! We came in early, because it started to pour. That cellmate is on our side! While we were in the yard, I pretended to trip in front of him. Then he pulled me to my feet and asked me if I was okay. I told him I was fine, and then I showed him my stash of cash that was in the wall next to you. Get it? That rhymed. Anyway, he was interested and we set up a deal. When I execute my plan, he's going to help me. He says he has buddies in this place that can also help. My plan is falling into place, I'm telling you. He also said that he knows where they keep gasoline and rope. As for the apricots, I'm getting those when they serve them at lunch. They are tasty, so thankfully it's not their flesh that I need. I'll talk about what I'm doing with those later.

I think it is going to take about a month to gather everything I need. I am observing my surroundings; making notes about our schedules, watching for my particularly rowdy accomplices, ect. My friend is putting the rest of my supplies into a shed for me. He's also giving me the cell phone on our operation date; May 25th, so we could be in touch. Like I said before, it really is too sad that he is going to die. However, I won't shed a tear. Nobody cared when I was getting abused.

May 14th

I'm watching… and waiting… and watching… and waiting…

Just kidding. I wasn't going to write that for every entry for the past 24 days. Would you like to know why I haven't written in a while? It's because nothing important has been happening! I am extremely impatient now. I have often badgered my cell "friend" to move up the date, so I could stop fretting over everything for my plan turning out right, but he says to be patient. He also said that I haven't collected enough apricots. I reluctantly agreed with him. He's right. However, now that I thought of it, let me tell you what I'm going to do with the apricots.

I think it is a cool thing. Apricots have their own disguised, evil use. You can make them into a poison! Journal, have you ever eaten an apricot? You may say, "I haven't died from eating an apricot! How can it be poisonous?" Well, there is something in the kernel of the apricot, (which is surrounded by the pit) called hydrocyanic acid, or prussic acid, which is a deadly poison. (I found this out from an internet search. I typed in "what is a poison from fruit" and came up with the idea to get it from apricots!) If you take 1mg of it for every kilogram of weight from a person's body and feed it to them, it is enough to kill them. I thought about poisoning the prison guards, but then I thought it would be better to cause two distractions on the day of the riot. I'll tell you about those tomorrow, because I'm getting bored of writing. What Journal? don't get offended! There are other things to do in life than write. Sheesh!

May 15th

This is the last day that I'm writing in here before after the day of escape. I know, I'll miss you until then too. I'm sad, but I wanted to tell you the two parts of my diversion! The first part is the riot. (Duh)! I singled out all of the members that would want to fight. My friend is going to start it for me while I do the rest of my plan. The second part of my diversion is that I am going to poison some of the weaker inmates, so there are two things that the guards will have to deal with. Then while they are distracted, we will work together to finish our plan. In the end, I win out, and there is no one there to tell on me! There is much more to this, but this journal entry is going to be short. I want to tell you all the details when it actually happens. Next time I write, you will get a really long story.

May 25th

This was the day that we execute our plan. It started at lunch, where my "friend" was going to start the riot. He shoved some people, yell nasty comments at them, and got a guy to throw a punch at him. That guy missed and conveniently hit another guy with a bad temper, and then everybody started to fight. There were a number of gasps as the people I poisoned with the hydrocyanic acid fell to the ground and died. I had poisoned 13 people in all. I found it ironic to use the number 13, because it was associated with bad luck and I didn't think it was jinxing my plan though, so that was helpful. It seemed to be going fine.

The point of going through all of the trouble of poisoning people and start a riot was to distract the guards with two problems while my friend and I (excuse my proper grammar) soaked the hallways with our gasoline. Up and down the hallways we sprinted, making sure to completely coat the floor with a thin layer of gasoline. The guards had seen that everything was out of control and placed the ward on lockdown. That meant that no one could go in or out of the ward, so we wouldn't be disrupted. We rounded the corner to our last spot to coat with gasoline. It was a narrow, secluded hallway with a closet at the end. This is where it ended. I told my friend to go first, and then when we reached the closet, I yanked open the door, whirled around, and shoved him in it. He let out a cry of protest and landed on the floor.

This was the part I didn't tell him. He didn't know that we weren't going to live at the end of our mission. I threw some gasoline on the closet door and ignored his banging and yelling for help. I picked up the last can of gasoline that I had and slowly opened it. I took a deep breath, sniffing in the fumes. Ah, victory. I took the entire thing, walked back down the hall, still slowly of course, and stopped when I reached the landing. The hallway was directly above the chaos downstairs. I picked up the container and threw its contents onto the crowd below. They looked up at me with confusion.

I reached into my pocket and took out a matchbook. I tucked the empty gasoline container under my arm. From there I pulled out a single match from the book and struck it. It sputtered, then flared to life and the flame danced on the tip of the match. The people looking up at me suddenly realized what I was doing. "He's going to light the place on fire!" I heard one man scream. If you thought there was chaos before, you should of seen now. Everybody was trying to escape. I only laughed at them. I was more intent on watching the match I held in my hand.

I leaned over the railing and held the match with the tip of my fingers. Those people were powerless to stop me. "I'm the leader now," I thought. I leaned forward a little more and deliberately dropped the match. It fell from my fingers and I watched it as it twirled as it fell to the ground, almost like an autumn leaf falling from a tree and taking forever to finally land because it kept getting caught in the breeze. The second it made contact with gasoline, the flames exploded with power and became a huge mass which quickly spread, consuming everything in its path. I watched the flames engulf everything around me, until there was nothing around me but fire. It exhilarated me. I laughed manically as they destroyed everything. "I won this battle," I thought. "I RULE THE WORLD!"

MY ESCAPE PLAN CHECKLIST

Number 1: Find violent people to cause problems: ex. tough dudes.

Number 2: Make friends with one or many prison guards. I need an ally.

Number 3: Gather materials that I need: lighters, rope, and gasoline. LOTS of it. Also some apricots. Maybe a cell phone too.

Number 4: Find a way to cause a distraction.

Number 5: Execute Escape Plan. Timing is key in this.

NOTE: DON'T GET CAUGHT!