Namesake

By: Riley

Summary – The ceremony that gave Rocky his ninja name was a big point in his life. But he'd already been given an important name, one he constantly struggled to live up to. Sort of sequel to 'Pressure'.

Filling out forms was a simple task for anyone. You wrote down your given, birth, or name you go by in the dedicated space and that was that. And if you didn't like your name, there was always a chance for to legally change it later.

Rocky didn't have either of those options. His name was too important. Both of them. So much so that when he was to write his name down on a form—like the personal college essay he was starting to outline—he struggled over which one to choose.

Colt and Tum-Tum had it easy.

Tum-Tum was never a name that'd be taken too seriously outside of close friends and family, he chose to write down 'Michel' when the time came, in his somewhat sloppy handwriting. (Which was only so sloppy as he focused more on the food in his other hand than perfecting his penmanship when first learning how to write). Colt, on the other hand, was a good nickname that everyone called him by. Even their teachers called him Colt, even on the first day of school. He'd made it clear he didn't respond to much else—though their principal made a clear show of authority by calling him Jeffrey when the time called for it. So much so that the only time Colt ever wrote out his real name was when it was a medical or government document of some sort. Otherwise, he was strictly known as Colt.

Rocky was stuck, ironically, between a rock and a hard place. He either had to put down 'Rocky Douglass' or 'Samuel Douglass Jr.'. It was the latter that gave him the most pause. Because it was what gave him the most amount of pressure. He hadn't asked to be named after his father. He hadn't asked to be a 'junior'. And he certainly hadn't asked to have all the pressure and expectations of it put on him simply because of his name.

No one ever called him Samuel (other than teachers). Thankfully. It seemed a bit stuffy for him. Jennifer insisted on calling him Samuel and he nearly cringed every time she did so. Some people called him Sam. That was fine. Unless he was with his father. If 'Sam' was mentioned, both would immediately turn around to see who was addressing him. Then there'd be the same comment he'd heard his entire life.

"With a name like that, I bet you're going to grow up to be just like your father."

And his father would smile proudly and agree it was so. Rocky was sure he'd even seen his chest swell with pride. Literally seen it. All the while Rocky's head would hang further and further. Living up to his father's name was harder than anyone would expect.

Not just because of having to figuratively and literally follow in his footsteps.

But because of knowing all eyes were on him as he did so.

So what name should he write down? Samuel Douglass Jr., the boy who was the apple of his parents' eye as the first born and, in his brother's eyes—and slight antagonism—could do no wrong? Or Rocky, the one who tended to show his real self; who was admittedly a bit arrogant, could be a showoff because he had the means to, and was a leader in every sense of the word.

That was the difference, he realized.

That when he was 'Samuel' he put on a front, pretended to be what his parents wanted him to be. He'd looked up his name meaning before for fun with Emily, Samuel meaning 'God as Heard' or 'Name of God'. His brothers laughed at that one. (About as hard as Rocky laughed when finding out 'Jeffrey' meant 'peaceful pledge' and 'Michael' meant 'who is like God'). When he was Rocky he could be himself; cool and solid as granite rock.

Who did he want to be? It was the point of college, wasn't it? Going off and finding yourself. How do you find yourself and become your own person when you were being forced to go to the college your parents wanted you to? Splitting your life in half even further?

Rocky dropped the pen from his hand and pushed the blank sheet of paper away from him.

He still had time to figure it out.

He just hoped he found the answer.

"Rocky!" He heard Tum-Tum shout from downstairs. "Come play with us! Colt's being unfair."

"He's just mad I'm winning!" Colt shouted back.

Rocky couldn't help but smile. For the time being he was fine being 'Rocky'.

THE END

A/N: I've also wondered about Rocky's thoughts to this topic as well. What can I say? I'm a Rocky girl and I always love getting into his head a bit more. I'm not sure if there'll be more like this before Crossroads is put up, but always check back to see!

Cheers,

-Riley