Authors note; written for my friend Jessica L Nite who sent me this prompt.
Chapter one.
Some memories never went away, they stayed with you no matter how hard you tried to outrun them.
Lana Lang knew this with absolute certainty.
Three years had passed since she had said goodbye to the name of Luthor.
Since she had said goodbye to Lex.
And yet he haunted her still.
Some deep, dark and mostly hidden part of her knew that what she had shared with Lex couldn't be duplicated or simply forgotten.
No matter what he had done.
He was the devil, admittedly.
A devil dressed in Armani with knowledgeable fingers which had set her blood on fire.
Clark was lost to her now and even though she had tried to feel betrayed and hurt by Lex separating her from her high school sweetheart for all eternity, the truth was that the only emotion she could muster over the loss of Clark was relief.
Lex had saved her once again, just as he's always had.
There was never a time when Lana hadn't gone to Lex with her troubles, even now, with an indestructible body she wished she still could.
The hate she knew she should feel for her ex husband had long since disappeared.
Had it ever really existed?
He had lied to her, yes, and yet she had lied too.
She had denied how much he had meant to her, she had denied her own heart.
But the truth was, that she had been so used to being the picture perfect small town girl, she had always done what was expected of her.
Everyone had thought she and Clark would end up together. They would get married, have 2.4 kids and live on a farm with a white picket fence, just like the farm Clark had grown up on. She'd have been the perfect wife and mother, baking and making sure they had a home to be proud of.
They would have been happy.
At least that was the fantasy.
Lana knew that the memory of Lex's face would never leave her, his eyes always intense when they met hers, had branded her very soul.
Sometimes late at night she would wake up bathed in sweat, gasping for air, filled with a sense of urgency and desire that only Lex could bring to life inside of her.
The memory of his hands and body driving her to the brink of insanity were her only solace.
Her own fingers would find the ache and rub it away to the image of Lex holding her immobile while she came apart in his hands, his name a plea on her lips.
The years had not erased his power over her, it had not deminish his hold on her heart or body.
That's why Lana had tried to hate him, because it was the only way she could leave him.
Even now, tears filled her eyes when she thought if how he had tricked her into marrying him, how he had faked their child's existence.
Her apartment in uptown Metropolis was too small to contain her erattic pacing as she tried to escape her own memories.
Lex, Lex, Lex...her mind was filled with him.
"Leave me alone!" she cried to the empty room, tears trickling down her cheeks, her long hair tangled.
She raked her hair off her face, her movements agitated and jerky.
She had cut it off after she left him, breaking yet another tie to Lex and all her demons.
Lex had loved her hair, often wrapping it around his hand as she had knelt before him, her lips wrapped around his cock.
He had stroked it back from her face more times than she could count, commenting that he love it's texture.
Fine silk, he'd called it.
A year after she had divorced him she had let it grow back.
For herself, she insisted.
Because he was dead.
Oliver Queen had killed him and Lana would never admit how she had cried the day she had found out he was gone.
She had ran to a quiet place and sobbed so hard she'd thrown up, hate and love conflicting within her with a force so deadly she couldn't stand it.
Why wasn't he there to hate anymore?
Lex was supposed to exist to taunt her.
The world was empty without him.
Suddenly, like a discarded piece of fabric she collapsed onto the sofa which dominated her small living room.
Exhausted from her emotions, torn asunder but memories.
This was her nightly ritual, her meticulously engineered suit unable to protect her from the only thing which could hurt her; loneliness.
She missed Lex.
And it was a secret which she would take with her to her grave.
Authors note; This is the first chapter in a multi-chapter story.