A/N: Hello House Fandom! So I know I should probably continue "Enough" but I have a million ideas for song fic. Oneshots bouncing around inside my brain as the product of listening to music 24/7 and watching House practically every day. I needed a break from that story and this is the result. It's A/U and probably a little OOC but in my mind I believe if House would have LET himself change he could have, anybody can change if they really want to. This is a story about House actually being happy, based on the song 'This' by Darius Rucker. I don't own the song (I just paid $1.29 for it on iTunes) and I don't own House. I'm writing this simply for my own enjoyment so don't sue me :) (Lyrics are included just in case you've never heard the song you'll know where I got everything from!) This takes place from 'After Hours' onward. 'Moving On' doesn't exist in my book. I find that completely unrealistic even for him. Running a car through her house and then going to the beach… without a car mind you because it was in Cuddy's dining room. I just find that stupid.
Got a baby girl sleeping in my bedroom
And her mama laughing in my arms
There's the sound of rain on the rooftop
And the game's about to start
House was sitting on the couch in the living room of his new home. The television was on, the hockey game was about to start. Wilson was supposed to be coming over and bringing dinner and they were going to watch the game together. Cuddy was currently sitting next to House, her head on his shoulder and his arm around her. She was laughing at his comments about the short, balding announcer that no one seemed to like. Rachel was asleep in their bedroom, she had a cold and Cuddy promised her she could sleep in their bed with them tonight in case she woke up in the middle of the night not feeling good. House cracked another few jokes about the annoying announcer causing Cuddy to erupt into another fit of giggles. Watching her laugh made House smile every time, it never failed. Just then the doorbell rang and Cuddy got up to let Wilson in. He had brought enough chinese food for three and got an extra carton of rice for Rachel in case she got her appetite back soon. Wilson sat down in the chair after depositing the chinese food on the table and Cuddy passed the food around making sure everyone got what they wanted. Cuddy and House settled back into the couch as the game started. They were both cheering for the New Jersey Devils while Wilson was cheering for the Islanders, House and Wilson had a fifty buck bet on the game (and clearly Wilson was going to lose). As House ate his chinese food and yelled at the television and laughed with his wife and his best friend. He honestly couldn't believe how much things had changed in just a few years.
I don't really know how I got here
But I'm sure glad that I did
And it's crazy to think that one little thing
Could've changed all of it
Two years ago House was a cynical misanthropic jerk with a bad limp and an even worse attitude. He kept everyone at arms length, he treated everyone like dirt and aside from hookers he had pretty much sworn off women. No woman even wanted to get close enough to him to try to crack that ridiculous sourpuss exterior. No woman except Lisa Cuddy. His yelling, his tantrums, his pranks, none of them kept her away. Sure, she wasn't pursuing a romantic relationship with him, but she was the closest thing to a relationship he had. She was always there for him when he needed her, even when he didn't know he needed her. House just shook his head and smiled. He had no idea how he got to the point he was at right now. She never should have fell for him, she never should have let him into her life this way. He was no longer the unbearable man he was before. Sure he still had a horrible bedside manner and was an ass at work, he had to be. That had to be his mindset if he wanted to do his job the way it needed to be done. Not that it makes any sense but it was the truth. At home, he was different. He didn't write love poetry or dole out complements like candy and he wasn't a complete open book. The difference is he finally let Cuddy in little by little. He learned to trust her and found out that wasn't the worst thing in the world. He found out that yes, he was flawed, but she didn't see him differently because of it. She didn't leave him because she found out about his father's abuse. She didn't dump him because he had a gigantic scar on his leg and walked with a cane. She didn't care what was wrong with him, she just tried to help make it better. House had never let someone get close enough to do that before, but once he did he realized he kind of liked it. He even started to let Wilson in a little and not give him quite the hard time that he used to (of course they still pranked one another, secretly it was something they both enjoyed). House had taken a liking to Rachel too. Even when he was a complete jerk to her, she still smiled at him. She always asked him if his leg was okay and they bonded over that somewhat inappropriate pirate cartoon. House smiled at the memories running through his mind. He never thought he'd be here like this.
Maybe it didn't turn out like I planned
Maybe that's why I'm such, such a lucky man
House never planned for his life to go this way. When he was young he figured he'd grow up, go to college, get a job, get married. Every kid thinks that's how their life is going to go until they get to about high school, then the reality of situations start to set in. By high school House knew he wanted to save lives, not take them. He knew the military was out and becoming a doctor was high on his priority list. He went to college and med school. He was kicked out of a med school or two for cheating but he still got his medical license. He jumped from job to job because he was horribly sarcastic and his bedside manner was terrible. He also had a skewed sense of ethics which landed him in many lawsuits. He finally met a girl that could accept him the way he was, and then the infarction happened. He had slipped into what could only be classified as a depression after that. He was worse than before. Nothing made him happy anymore, nothing made life worth living to him except his job. The puzzles are what kept him going, that and lots and lots of Vicodin. He never saw himself as a drug addict but that's what he had become. He had turned into a monster. Not the same kind as his father but a monster of a different kind, the kind that hurt everyone around him but was worst on himself. House knew he was lucky to end up where he did. Cuddy, Rachel and Wilson were truly his saviors and he was glad he could see that now.
For every stoplight I didn't make
Every chance I did or I didn't take
All the nights I went too far
All the girls that broke my heart
All the doors that I had to close
All the things I knew but I didn't know
Thank God for all I missed
Cause it led me here to this
House had long given up on watching the game. He was too engrossed in his own thoughts. Wilson was over in the chair whining about how bad the Islanders were playing (which struck House as funny because when was the last time they actually played well?) Cuddy was snuggled up into his side cheering on the Devils (she knew quite a bit about hockey which came as a surprise to House when he first found out, she possibly even knew more than he did and that made him love her even more). House wondered how things could have been different if little things hadn't happened. He thought about the one time back after he had just gotten his drivers license and he was trying to speed through a light because he was late to school as was the kid in front of him. The kid in front of him sped to catch the light and House knew even if he was right on that kid's tail he'd never make it so he slowed down trying not to think about how many days of detention he'd be getting for another tardy. The kid in front of him made it to the middle of the intersection before the light turned red and was T-boned by a truck speeding from a different direction. House was shocked. He was still late to school because he had to stay and talk to the police as a witness to the crash but that could have been him, and he might not have made it. He thought about some of the nights he went too far with different girls, or when he got a little too drunk. The nights where he was so drunk were usually the nights he was the most human. He would go on rants to Wilson about how much of a screwup he truly was, how much he actually loved Cuddy and how much he just wanted to end it all. A drunk House was an honest House, something sober House hardly ever was. House smiled again as he realized everything that happened to him, happened for a reason. It brought him here with Cuddy and Rachel.
Like the girl I loved in high school
Who said she could do better
Or the college I wanted to go to
Till I got that letter
House thought about his high school girlfriend Amanda, man he hadn't thought about her in years. They dated from the ninth grade all the way up until the middle of twelfth. House was really in love with her. She broke up with him because she said she could do better. She said he was great sometimes but other times she knew he didn't really care about her or want to be with her. She said she could do a lot better than him. She ended up pregnant from a random drunk college guy no more than two months later. Yeah, she really did better. He also thought about how he had never wanted to go to Michigan for college. He actually wanted to go to Princeton and study with PPTH. His acceptance letter fell short. They congratulated him on his achievements, they said he was what they were looking for but all the spots for freshman were filled and he was on the wait list. Even if he did get accepted he would get little to no scholarship money because of the government funding cuts. House was angry for weeks about that but finally accepted that going there just wasn't in the cards. He had been accepted to three other schools and chose Michigan on a whim, mostly because it was furthest away from his father.
All the fights and the tears and the heartache
I thought I'd never get through
And the moment I almost gave up
All led me here to you
House thought back to the infarction, something he tried to block out but could never fully do because of it's long term effects. What if that infarction had never happened? Would he still be with Stacy? Would they be married? Would they have kids? Would he still be a doctor? Would he have been a drug addict? The only reason House started working at PPTH was because of the infarction. He had been working at Princeton General for a few years. No one there liked him much and he had been close to losing his job on multiple occasions. It wasn't so much the infarction itself that got House fired from Princeton General, it was more the constant drug use which the board deemed abusive, coupled with his worsening mood over the break-up with Stacy and trying to become accustomed to walking with a limp and a cane. Cuddy had heard through the grapevine that House had been fired from Princeton General and offered him a job at PPTH. Wilson might not have a job either. Wilson and House had been friends for quite a few years and Wilson was looking to move back to Jersey. After House was settled in at PPTH he pulled some strings with Cuddy to hire Wilson who quickly climbed the ladder and became the head of Oncology. House chuckled quietly when he thought to himself that all this time since the infarction he had viewed it as a bad thing. It had taken away his athletic abilities, his strength, a woman he loved, his job. In reality it gave him everything that was sitting in front of him right now, including Rachel who had stumbled out into the living room asking for one of her sore throat lollypops. Cuddy got her one from the medicine cabinet and asked her if she wanted to relax out in the living room with Momma, House and Uncle Wilson which she really wanted to do. Dragging her blanket behind her Rachel rushed towards the couch and climbed up on House's good leg, snuggling in with her lollypop to watch the game with the adults. Rachel seemed to like hockey as much as her mother while not admitting to it, also like her mother. House felt something inside him stir when Cuddy settled back in with them. House finally felt he had a place he belonged. He caught Wilson smiling as he glanced over at the sight on the couch. Wilson knew too that finally House had something worth living for outside of puzzles and Vicodin.
I didn't understand it way back when
But sitting here right now it all makes perfect sense
House remembered a time back in college where he felt something similar. He had been hanging out with Cuddy for a semester and a half now. He met her in the bookstore right when school started and gave her a hard time which was expected, it's part of his nature. She had showed up not long after in his endocrinology class where they sat next to each other. He would lean over and whisper inappropriate things in her ear about different students or the professor and she would have to keep her composure. She always had one hell of a poker face. They would study together, end up going for late coffee and dinner after their night classes. House would show up at parties he knew Cuddy would be at just to see her, maybe embarrass her a little and even though he'd never admit it, he went to watch out for her too. They were close, they had become friends, until the night they became more than friends. It was unexpected and a spur of the moment decision. Cuddy went to a party with some of her friends and House just "happened" to be there as well. It was a frat party, kegs were flowing freely, girls were scantily clad and dancing on tables and the frat boys were drunk and stoned out of their skulls. House always kept one eye on Cuddy when he was at these parties, mostly to figure out the best times to make his approaches. The other reason was to watch out for creeps that tried to hit on her. Tonight the latter came into play. One really large, football playing frat boy was hitting on Cuddy. Normally when House saw these interactions Cuddy was flirting back. He usually went over and introduced himself as her brother or her boyfriend or something else just as crazy. Tonight though Cuddy wasn't flirting back. She was a little drunk which usually made her more forward but she seemed to want to get away from this guy and bad. He grabbed her by the wrist and House knew he was going to put a stop to this, even if it meant getting his teeth smashed in. House went up to Cuddy and put an arm around her waist. He asked her if everything was alright and the football player asked who he was. House claimed to be her boyfriend and surprisingly the football player backed off. He must not have been as interested in Cuddy as House thought because he had already moved to hitting on one of the sorority girls standing behind him. Cuddy thanked House for rescuing her and said she had had enough of the party. He offered to walk her back to her dorm. One thing led to another which led to House sneaking out of her dorm at 5:00 am. He didn't want to leave her but he had an early class, they were supposed to get their exam results back today. House went home to shower, shave and change and when he got back to his dorm he had a message from the dean on his answering machine telling him to meet at his office at 7:00 am today. House went to the meeting and was expelled for cheating. He didn't see Cuddy again until he was being rushed into her ER with the infarction.
For every stoplight I didn't make
Ever chance I did or I didn't take
All the nights I went too far
All the girls that broke my heart
All the doors that I had to close
All the things I knew but I didn't know
Thank God for all I missed
Cause it led me here to this
House started remembering all the little things Cuddy had done for him since being back in his life. She was there when he got shot, she oversaw all of his procedures. She was there for him when he was in the bus accident. Again, she oversaw all his procedures and stayed with him over night, cramping herself into that uncomfortable hospital chair, holding his hand just so he didn't have to be alone. She was there in his subconscience when he was hallucinating. Even in his hallucinations she stayed with him, she helped him detox. She was the reason he realized he needed to get help. By pissing her off so badly and announcing to the hospital that they slept together he was able to realize that everything he thought they had done was a figment of his imagination. She even helped him get into Mayfield, pulling some strings so that he could get in right away. She made sure he would get the proper patient care. Even if she didn't go with him to drop him off, she still did behind the scenes work to make sure he would be treated right. She was there at the crane collapse site. She told him off and he deserved it. He had been being an ass. He didn't expect her to see that he was trying to change when he had been stuck in the same rut for years. That was the night she truly saved him. He almost relapsed, he had been clean for a year. She came in like she always does and stopped him from making a horrible mistake. She told him she wanted a relationship and they kissed. She bandaged him up and cleaned him off. Kissing his scar was what really got to him though. Whenever he sees that scar he thinks pain, weakness, disfiguration. She didn't see it that way, it was a part of him and to her it was beautiful. The fact that she kissed it, something so loving, so gentle showed him that she didn't care if he was disfigured both physically and emotionally, she loved him the way he was and she was accepting him the way he was. That day following the crane collapse was the best day of House's life. They spent the day together, making love, sharing secrets and making plans for the future. After that they hit a rough patch. They fought at work, mostly over dumb stuff. Then she got sick. They thought it was kidney cancer but it ended up just being a benign tumor, she was fine. She needed House and he let her down. He thought he could fool her, he thought he could hide the fact that he had taken a Vicodin from her. He thought by giving himself that little push this one time he could find that he could be there for her the way he needed to be, with or without Vicodin. They broke up. He did dumb things to hurt her. He went through an astonishing amount of hookers, bought useless things, even married one of the hookers and invited her to their wedding. It wasn't until he had taken that experimental drug and had tumors in his leg that he realized how wrong he had went.
Again she was his savior, the only one to answer his call. She picked him up, took him to the hospital, went into the operating room and made sure he came out with two legs. She stayed with him as long as she could and when she left, she left a note (even if it was from Rachel, who he had missed just as much as Cuddy). He knew he had to change and apologize to her. So he did. He came to her house with her special hairbrush. She was having dinner with her sister and brother-in-law and some other guy. House was furious when he saw the other guy but instead of reacting how he normally would and doing something he'd regret, he walked up to the front door and knocked. He handed Cuddy her brush back and then he told her how sorry he was. He thanked her for being there for him, he told her he didn't want to be broken up anymore. He told her he could change and that he wanted to change because his life without her in it wasn't much of a life at all. Cuddy gave him a huge hug and a long kiss which effectively pissed off her dinner date who stormed out of the house and drove away quickly. It left her sister and brother-in-law shocked and they excused themselves quickly so House and Cuddy could sort everything out. They did sort everything out and have been together for a year and a half since. They got married four months ago. House proposed like a true gentleman, picked out a beautiful ring and dropped down to one knee. He knew it was what Cuddy deserved. He made sure Rachel was there and even made a proposal to her. He got her a little cracker jack ring and asked if it was okay if he married her mom which she replied "Of course it's okay you bloody scalawag!".
House laughed inwardly. All the things he though were bad in his life, all the times he had been sick, hospitalized with critical problems they led him to this scene right in front of him. They led him to Rachel sucking on her sore throat lollypop on his lap cheering for Zach Parise to score the game winning goal with only 13 seconds left. It led him to Cuddy who was cheering right alongside Rachel, holding his hand, sharing her excitement with him. It led him to Wilson who was shelling out his fifty bucks (easy money) and complaining about how he only lost because DePietro was out with yet another ailment. It was so unlike anything House had ever experienced before. He finally belonged somewhere and had people that cared about him and saw him as more than a jackass cripple. Every bad thing that ever happened to him led him to this and he truly didn't want it any other way.
A/N: So what did you think? It was OOC, that paragraphs were long and there was no dialogue. It was different than what I normally do I guess but I like the way it turned out, I like the picture that was painted of what House's life could have been if he would have changed a little and acted like a grown up. He could have been happy. Please tell me what you thought of this little oneshot. Reviews are my Vicodin :) xoxo
