I wrote this after seeing the episode "Sunday" for the first time. I usually don't write for shows that haven't ended yet (I usually don't read fics about them, either), but this one just had to be written.
No copyright infringements intended.
When Teyla asked me, I told her it hadn't hit me yet. I wasn't lying. But now, an hour later, as Elizabeth finishes her speech, it has hit me. Elizabeth's words did it. But I can't hate her for it.
I suppose one day I'll thank her. The best place to absorb the impact of someone's death is at the funeral, right? Surrounded by friends, feeling the same things you are… I stiffen my shoulders and my lip, then take my place by the casket as the bagpipes begin to play. I feel my resolve weaken as I touch the box that now holds one of my dearest friends captive forever, but he strengthens me. I know, it's crazy; he's dead, but somehow he did it. He never did let anyone on this base down, so now I can't let him down. He'll get the proper, dignified funeral he deserves.
The wormhole invites him home. I'm reluctant to let him go, but I think of the last lesson he taught me: It's not about saving yourself, it's about saving others. I step forward, hoping having his body will save his family some pain… despite my crushed soul.
We return him to his family, try to comfort them, and say good-bye. My heart aches even more as I realize I'm doing something Carson would never do. I'm leaving him behind.