Snow Rain

-

Hey, Sis.

Wake up, sleepy head. You used to say that to me, remember?

Talk to me.

Don't worry, we're alone.

Hmm, it's starting to snow again. This field here seems so empty, even though I know

Under all the snowcover, it's not empty.

Hey, remember

You used to yell at me when I woke up late. You said I was lazy and selfish. You said I took

My life for granted. My life! And you thought I didn't care about us. Well, I didn't care that much, but, but

I thought you did! I really thought— I thought—

No, I—I won't cry. I won't cry. I'm not crying.

Don't look at me like that! I knew this would happen. I told you so.

…

My idiot sister got herself killed. That's right, I'm calling you an idiot.

You big dummy. You tried to save us from another winter. As if you had to.

You didn't just tuck us in like you did when we were little or melt some chocolate over a warm fire.

You sold your life away because you wanted to earn it. Like everyone else in this…place here did.

You took the most dangerous mission because you said you had to.

You didn't think I could support us with what little I had left.

I know, you were worried about little Sissie's health, so…you said goodbye. You left, just like that.

Hey, Sissie's all right. She has a boyfriend now. I know, I know, right? She's not scared any more.

Ha, she's probably crying like a little baby now.

I can't look. I don't like to see her cry, you know. I came here alone.

Hey, remember when

We all went to festivals together? That was fun, wasn't it? Sissie was so silly and you were…happy then.

Why weren't you happy more, was it because of me, did you really hate me that much or

Maybe you thought I didn't do enough for us. Ha ha, I always messed things up, huh?

You really thought I was too greedy to think about us, so

You tried to be the hero again. As always.

And you were. But you weren't my hero. Ha ha. Oh, but you were Sissie's hero, though!

She loved you, Sis. And you loved her.

…

Hey, remember when

We all learned how to fly? You taught Sissie how to be strong and how to fly alone and I couldn't teach her anything.

And then you saved my life. I never paid you back for that. I couldn't. You wouldn't let me.

You were a better sister than I was. I know. You were braver, smarter, stronger than I was.

Everything I did, you did better. I wasn't good enough then, and I'm not good enough now.

Talk to me, Sis. Please! I'm right, aren't I?

You didn't think I was a very good sister, did you? But

I love you, Sis!

I—

I hate you. I hate you! I hate you! And, and—

And—

I knew how much you hated money so I threw it all away and

I buried you myself next all the other stupid idiots that got themselves killed, and, and

I put a big—free!—gray stone to mark where you are, but—

It looks just like all the others here. There are so many, and—

And now the stone's covered in snow and when I leave, it will be half-buried and

When I come back to this place, I won't be able to find you.

I'll lose you…again. And I'll feel sorry.

For…myself.

And I'll cry.

And I'll leave here alone.

And I'll learn a lesson.

That's what you wanted

Right?