Our tour manager called Ryan on his phone and told everyone that he was coming over to the bus in a bit. Actually, he called at 8:30 in the morning while we were all sleeping. So Ryan's phone woke us all up and we threw our pillows at Ryan, causing him to fall out of his bunk. We laughed as he cursed us out and answered his phone.

"Sup" he said indifferently. We heard a distant voice on the other line. Ryan said "Yeah okay" and then hung up.

"Who was it?" Ronnie asked. Ryan stood up and threw his cell on his bunk.

"Our tour manager, he says he's on his way over with some news. He said to get dressed and stuff, I call dibs on the bathroom!" Ryan yelled and leaped for the door just down the small hall. Some of us laughed and went to lounge around the kitchen for breakfast while Ryan took a shower. Ronnie grabbed the TV remote and turned it on to some cartoons. Derek and Ron were searching through the cabinets and fridge for food that can be cooked or fried, they're like the chefs of the band or something.

I grabbed my pack of cigarettes with its lighter and walked outside in just my boxers that stopped right above my knees. It was a bit hot outside but not too humid. There was a slight breeze, it felt nice, but it wouldn't let me light my fucking cigarette -.-

So I covered the lighter and cigarette in my mouth and lit the cigarette. I sucked in until I could feel the smoke burning at my throat and breathed out through my nose. Smoke came out of my nostrils and my mouth when I parted my lips. I could feel myself relaxing and leaned against the bus with my eyes closed as I took another taste of nicotine.

I heard the door of the bus open and close. So I cracked one eye open and saw Ronnie lean back against the bus right next to me. I took another puff and blew it out in Ronnie's face. He coughed and shoved me playfully by the shoulder. I chuckled and looked the other way.

"Morning," Ronnie said. I glanced over at him and said the same. "It's nice out here...wanna go walk over hot coals later?" he asked randomly. I chuckled and shook my head.

"What's wrong with you, Ronnie?" I laughed. He wiggled his eyebrows at nothing and shrugged. Ronnie glanced down at himself in a black tank top which defined what he had underneath a bit. Ronnie touched his left bicep and rubbed it.

"I have more muscles than you, Jacky," he said confidently. I chuckled and took another puff of smoke, half way done with the cigarette. Suddenly, Ronnie took my cigarette and took a lot of turns on the nicotine. I rolled my eyes as he finished it and tossed it to the ground and stomped on the lit cigarette. I stood up straight and bumped Ronnie roughly with my hip on his hip causing him to fall over. I laughed at him and walked around Ronnie to walk into the bus.

"I've got all the muscles I need, down there," I said with my back turned on him as I closed the door behind me. Ron and Derek were all done with breakfast. I could tell they made eggs, toast, and bacon immediately when I walked in. I practically floated over to the table and sat down in front of a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon, the toast was in a bunch on a bigger plate in the center of the table. Soon, Ryan came out of the shower and Ron made a run for the bathroom without even taking any clothes. Ryan sat down across the table from me and started stuffing his face with food. His full cheeks made him look like a puffy squirrel!

I chuckled at him and Derek sat down as Ronnie finally walked inside. He smacked the back of my head softly and sat down in the chair next to me and began eating. Everyone was practically eating aggressively. I didn't really want to eat anything. Lately, I've been having problems with eating and loss of appetite. I don't know why or how this happened. Wait. It must have been after that time a few weeks ago when I became depressed with my image. I thought I wasn't all that fit like the other guys and that the fans would look at me differently. So I think that's when I subconsciously stopped eating as much.

Maybe it just seemed like everyone else was eating aggressively because I didn't have the appetite to enjoy even looking at this food. I shrugged to myself and tried to eat something today. I picked at the scrambled eggs with my fork, but I couldn't even attempt to put some in my mouth. The food just grossed me out somehow. I bit my lip nervously as I looked around at everyone else. No one has noticed yet, I took a silent deep breath and lifted a fork of scrambled eggs into my mouth hesitantly. As I chewed and swallowed, I nearly scowled at how awful my taste buds were reacting to this. But I forced myself to eat every single thing on the plate. The others finished way before me, I was eating at a turtle's pace.

When I finished, I pushed my plate aside and just sat there alone. I felt a rumbling noise course through my stomach, a sick nausea came over me. Just as Ron walked out of the bathroom, I ran inside and threw myself over the toilet to regurgitate what was in my stomach. It felt like my soul was being pried right out of me and into this toilet.

Ryan, Derek, and Ronnie all rushed into the bathroom and just stared at me as I paused to look at them. Then more shit threatened to climb up my throat and I went back to violently gorging into the toilet. Ronnie stepped behind me and held back my hair from my face.

A few minutes later, Ron walked inside dressed as I finished throwing up. I closed the lid and flushed the toilet as I stood up. Then I walked over to the sink and turned the faucet on with cold water. I glanced back at the guys motioning with my eyes to get the hell out. They all left except for Ronnie. I washed my face and brushed my teeth, checking twice. As I dried my face, Ronnie sat on the bathroom counter.

"What happened to you?" He asked seriously. I stared at the floor for a moment.

"I don't know...the food probably didn't go down properly," I mumbled. Ronnie narrowed his eyes at me dubiously and...with tenderness and sympathy. I ignored that look and rushed him out of the bathroom.

"Sorry, I'm gonna shower."

"But the old man's gonna be here soon," Ronnie said in a joking warning. I chuckle and look at him.

"The old coot takes like two hours when he says he's "on his way.""