AN: This is basically Esme's story, from when she loses her baby, to (I'm planning on) the end of Breaking Dawn. Obviously I will have to read BD first but it will take me a while! Everything is from her point of view.
DISCLAIMER: Unfortunately I do not own any of these characters though I will negotiate with Stephenie…
He was gone. Gone forever. My little baby. He was gone, and there was no longer a reason to live. No reason for my heart to keep beating. I was a waste of space, waste of oxygen. He was my life. My one responsibility that mattered. That I cared about. And I had failed. I let him down. Let down a tiny defenseless baby. And I was still selfish. I didn't deserve it, but I wanted to see him again. Hold him in my arms. Tell him I love him. And that I'm sorry. And tell him everyone is wrong. Tell him that even though they say the lung infection killed him, and I couldn't have helped him…
My dress tore on a sharp boulder as I made my way up the rocks. I was almost there. I involuntarily whimper as I felt a stick cut a deep gash in my leg. But it didn't matter. I was there. The edge of the cliff. I inhaled deeply and looked at the expanse of land below. I smiled gently. Nothing mattered. My days of tortuous depression, my nights of insomnia- they so very far behind me.
'I'm sorry my child. I'll be with you soon' I thought to my son. I clenched my fists and let my aching head finally spin into the black hole. A long sigh escaped my mouth. The wind gently blew at my face. My knees bent… and I jumped.