Learn to be Lonely
Disclaimer: Wicked is owned by Gregory Maguire, Stephen Schwartz and Winnie Holzman.
Galinda flopped down on her bed. Elphaba was reading across from her on her own bed from the light of a candle. Galinda stared at the rain clouds outside and huffed.
Shenshen was caught up in revising for a test she had the next day and Pfannee was in bed sick. Galinda was left alone in her room with a certain roommate.
She huffed again. Elphaba didn't look up as she said, "That is incredibly irritating when I am trying to read, Miss Galinda."
Galinda sat up and pulled her tongue out at the green girl. Elphaba didn't react. Galinda smiled.
"I saw that too," Elphaba said, still without looking up from her bed. She was sitting cross legged with her boots kicked off next to the bed. With the heat of the fire she had removed her tights as well and her bare green legs were wrapped under her skirt.
"Just because I am looking at this book doesn't mean that I can't see you as well."
Galinda shook her head and turned to her makeup box. She pulled out a few things but found that she was not in the mood for it. She put them back with a sigh.
"I'm bored," she said as she fell back against her pillows. She could see the shadows from the fire dancing on the ceiling.
Elphaba finally looked up at the blonde from over her glasses that were balanced precariously on the end of her nose. "May I suggest studying? It is what you came to Shiz for after all."
Galinda raised an eyebrow at the green girl. "I think not, Miss Elphaba. I came to Shiz to make friends and have fun, not study and be borifying. Not like -"
She was about to say 'like you' but when she noticed Elphaba's mouth turn into a hard line, almost ready for the biting comment, Galinda caught herself.
It was the first time she had considered her roommates feelings about the comments she got, most of which she did nothing to deserve.
"Miss Elphaba?" Elphaba did not react. "Do you ever … don't you ever get lonely?"
Elphaba looked up in surprise. "What? Why?"
Galinda shrugged and fiddled with a loose string on her dress. "No reason, I'm just making conversation."
Elphaba shut the book after marking her place and pushed her glasses up her nose. "Well, I have my sister. And my books."
"But they're not much company." At Elphaba's hard look, Galinda back tracked. "I mean, I'm sure your sister is perfectly nice, but wouldn't you like to have your own friends?"
Elphaba shrugged and brought her knees to her chest. "I don't know. I guess, I've learned to be lonely."
"'Learned to be lonely'?" Galinda tilted her head to the side and swung her legs over the side of her bed.
"I've been alone my whole life. I guess I've learned to love a life alone." Elphaba sat on the edge of her bed, her toes on the floor. She gazed down, her arms crossed over her stomach.
"So…you don't think you need friends? Or someone to be there for you?" Galinda's eyebrows furrowed. "Don't you have feelings?"
"Of course I do! I just…pretend not to." Elphaba shot back. She dug her fingers into the blankets on her bed. "It's…easier that way."
"But if people could see how much it upset you, wouldn't they stop?"
Elphaba looked up at Galinda like the girl was crazy. "No. They'd keep going until they got the most entertainment out of me. What, do you think anyone cares about my feelings?"
Galinda shrugged. "I don't know. I have friends. I have people to talk to. And I have feelings. It's just strange to me that you seem to have none of these things."
Galinda glanced at the clock and noticed that Shenshen would be done. She jumped off the bed and pulled on her shoes. She grabbed a bag and only looked back once on her way out of the room. Elphaba was sat on the bed, reading her book with her legs crossed. It was as if their conversation had never happened.
Galinda shut the door behind her.
Elphaba looked up briefly. Was she lonely? She had her books and her sister, but did she want more?
She shook her head. She had already accepted that she was destined to live life alone. She had embraced it and these thoughts didn't help. She looked back down at her book, being sucked back into another world, if only to escape the one she was in.
AN: Thoughts are appreciated. Thanks for reading.