Hi! This is just a piece of crack that's been floating around in my head for a while. I hope you enjoy it! ^_^
Disclaimer: I do not own Scream or any characters appearing in this fanfic. Except for Apprentice. She's mine, and I couldn't think of a decent name for her. :/
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I woke up on the floor next to my bed. At first I couldn't figure out why I was on the floor, then I remembered. I had been startled out of sleep by the sound of glass breaking. I hoped it wasn't another window. We've gone through at least twelve this week.
Still groggy, I made my way to the front room. Sure enough, the window next to the front door had a big hole in the middle of it, and glass and muddy footprints were all over the floor. I followed the footprints to Ghostface's room. Figures. He never uses the door.
Angrily, I pounded on his door. When he anwered, I grabbed his ear and dragged him, yelping and whining, to the broken window. Once there, I released his ear and glared at him as he stared at the floor.
"Ghostface, don't you ever use the door?"
He fidgeted. "You know I don't have any patience for doorknobs…."
"And you know how expensive it is to replace windows as I've been taking money out of your bank account to replace them."
Ghostface stared at me in shock. "So that's why I couldn't get a witdrawal! You've been cheating me!"
"Hey, it's my house. If you break something, you'll have to pay for it." I replied evenly.
He glared at the floor again, muttering under his breath. "… Stupid Apprentice…doors… useless…." And so on. I knew that under regular circumstances, such as, if I were his apprentice only, he wouldn't hesitate to kill I was also apprenticed to Freddy Krueger, Michael Myers, Leatherface, Jason Voorhees, and others. They all wanted their killings to continue after they could no longer kill, and I wanted to learn the techniques of killing because I'm just messed up like that.
I turned to the window, ignoring the sulking Ghostface. "I should figure out some way of fixing this window so it doesn't break anymore…."
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When I was taking my morning walk, I saw a dog going in and out of its house. The door wasn't open; it was using a doggy door. I straightened.
Perfect.
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Back home, I got Leatherface, Candyman, and Chucky to help me convert the window into an extra- large doggy door. When we were done, it looked just the same as it did before, just not broken. Then, we waited.
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Ghostface ran home. He had just killed someone and wanted to be home before anybody noticed and started calling the police. He leapt at the window, only to have it swing inward. He landed inside, crouching on the floor. The window frame filled his vision, which confused him. Wasn't he already inside?
Then it hit him.
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We watched Ghostface leap inside, then stare at the window as it swung back down and hit him in the forehead. My eyes widened, and I ran over to see if he was all right. He was out cold.
Chucky came up behind me. "Think this'll teach him to use the door?"
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A/N Very stupid, I know. Anyways, I hope you liked it.