A/N: My "The Way We Were" is almost certainly the only explanation for the finale, and it couldn't have been worse – Michelle's fall wasn't bad. She could be out less than 30 minutes, and it couldn't have been life threatening. Otherwise, her problems would be much worse, with a much longer hospital stay than a week. So, in "The Way We Were," I said the ER was very busy. Medical people in my family say it's common to be left waiting like that. "Just regained consciousness" like is said in the episode is how some say total consciousness, even if patient was awake but woozy for hours. Plus, as I showed, she was likely home 1-2 days later and her memory returned slowly, like normal, though headaches could have kept her in 1-2 days more before they disappeared, making it till that Friday.
But, there is a time when doctors have no explanation, but…you'll see.
"The Way We Were" is still canon, I'm sure. Something like this brings an even bigger change, and books that seem to be TV canon show them close, Michelle nicer, etc., but it's more gradual. Still, this would explain why she "just regained consciousness" and could suddenly talk coherently; and why that "amnesia" lingered.
Not fun to think about even as a slim possibility, so like "Just Like We Always Will" I made it a dream. And, as one might expect from the title, heavily faith-based, so if you don't like that, you better get off here :-)
Anatomy of a Miracle
"Dr. Daniels to ER, STAT!"
Stephanie Tanner, thirteen, was oblivious to the buzzing excitement and rushing medical staff in the hospital. She was just on her way there, being driven by her older sister D.J. – who kept insisting that Stephanie stop berating herself. Their youngest sister, Michelle, was being rushed to the hospital after a fall from a horse.
"Come on, Steph; let's focus on something positive."
"Right; like the story of that little boy who kept singing "You Are My Sunshine" to his baby brother and he came back to life. Fine. I'll just sing that till Michelle wakes up, even if I have to sing it for days," she fretted.
D.J. found herself praying, just as they'd done at the horse show when they learned Michelle was missing. Now, all they could do was wait.
Stephanie was too busy wallowing, absorbed in how little time she'd spent with Michelle lately, in how big their argument had been to Stephanie. D.J.'s prayer was for her, too; she could tell when Stephanie was going overboard. And, Stephanie began to think, too, as the loving, gentle nudge of the Spirit triggered a thought.
A desperate seven-year-old Stephanie didn't know what to do. Mr. Bear, a stuffed animal given by their mother when Michelle was brought home after being born, was missing. He was more than a bear to her – he was her best friend. The schoolgirl prayed. "God, I know you're busy. But, if you could find Mr. Bear, I'd really be a happy camper."
Back in the present, Stephanie blurted out, "Dear God, I want Michelle back! Don't let when I rushed out to the trail be the last time I ever see her! It can't be!"
D.J. rubbed her back with one arm as they pulled into the hospital lot behind the others, and the soothing touch of the Spirit gently nudged Stephanie's heart. The Lord was not heard in an audible voice – rather, as she prayed and got in touch with her self-anger, the thoughts and feelings seemed to come naturally.
"I love you, Stephanie," came the voice filled with peace.
"I don't care, right now all I care about is Michelle!"
"Before I can hear your prayer, there is something between us, isn't there?"
Stephanie frowned. "You're right…I know I shouldn't have fought with her. I told her I was sorry and I forgave her when I rushed out to see her, on Elizabeth's horse…while they were putting that backboard under her. But, I don't even know if she heard me…"
Stephanie shuddered as an attendant came out to tell the Tanners what was going on; Danny Tanner, his brother-in-law, Jesse Katsopolis, and best friend Joey Gladstone were already there, having come in another car.
"The doctors have rushed Michelle into surgery; she has swelling on her brain."
Danny was stunned. "Oh my…how bad is it?"
"They're doing all they can," the attendant said in a tone that said he was trying to sound optimistic, but wasn't totally; swelling could be a very dangerous sign.
"Oh, I knew it," Stephanie sobbed on D.J.'s shoulder. "Michelle thinks I hate her, now she's going to die, and it's all my fault." Joey sat beside her as D.J. left.
"Steph, you have to think positive. D.J.'s going over there now to call a couple friends at the church you guys go to sometimes, and they're starting a prayer chain…"
"What good will that do? I can't pray," she exclaimed, lashing our with one arm. "I wouldn't forgive her; I committed the unpardonable sin! She hates me, and God might as well hate me, too!"
The Spirit didn't have to do much urging to get Jesse to speak next. Jesse – Danny's brother-in-law – and Joey had moved in to help raise the girls after their mother died.
"Whoa, Steph, calm down." Uncle Jesse said.
"Why? Give me one good reason why? My little sister's life is hanging by a thread in there! I can't imagine doing anything worse! How could God ever love me again after I wouldn't forgive my own sister?" Stephanie complained.
"Cause, you know we've always loved you no matter what."
"That's just it, Uncle Jesse. I don't deserve it," she said, interrupting him as he mentioned one time when she'd done something very bad. Inside, she was thinking, "I don't even deserve fresh air!"
The Spirit touched Stephanie's heart again. Suddenly, Stephanie was remembering another time, when she'd wondered the exact same thing. When she was the same age as Michelle was now.
"Steph, come out from under there," Danny was saying to his precious daughter, who was hiding under the covers.
"I don't deserve fresh air…And you should send me away to carpenter school so I can build you a brand new house, so you can live in it without me!...And you should never have to hug me or kiss me again!" The frustration she was feeling inside was because she had backed Joey's car into the kitchen. The little girl barely held back tears as she stood, filled with aggravation over what she'd done.
Danny spoke very tenderly, which shocked her, given how much of a mess she made. She couldn't recall the exact words, just as with her words, but she recalled the gist. "Steph, there is nothing you could do to make me stop hugging and kissing you."
Stephanie sniffled, asking with a little hesitation, "Nothing?"
"Come here. Steph, cars and houses are just things. We can always get a new car, or put up a new wall. But, there's only one Stephanie Judith Tanner. And you can never be replaced," he finished lovingly. They embraced warmly as she pondered the thought.
Jesse was reminding her of that in the present. Meanwhile, in the operating room…
Michelle found herself watching the surgeons – seeing the frustration on their faces as they tried to control the swelling. And yet, she wasn't scared at all. Where was she?
She turned abruptly. "Mom! I…I've only seen you in pictures. Am I…" She recalled learning about God, and forgiveness, the times she'd been in church - she even trusted Jesus to save her last Christmas, though she was young enough she hadn't totally understood it. But, still...
"No, my Dear. Let's just watch the action," spoke Pam Tanner in her glorified body, glowing with radiance – just like all around them.
"it's so beautiful here," Michelle said as she started glancing around her. Suddenly, it was much brighter; they could see below, but where she was…words couldn't begin to describe the sights, the sounds, the…everything. It was so peaceful, so joyous!
"And if you think the looks are something; everything up here tastes like chocolate to me! It would taste like whatever the person's favorite food is."
"Wow!" Michelle's eyes grew wide. It hadn't been said much, but her love for sweets had come from her mom, too.
D.J. had come back from getting the prayer chain going. "I know we don't get to church much, but the people we called will be supportive; there's going to be quite a few people praying," D.J. told her. Jesse told her what he'd been telling Stephanie. "Uncle Jesse's right. Steph, remember what we talked about after you wrecked Joey's car?"
"Yeah; that night I still couldn't understand why you were so nice to me. And, I had a decision to make; I let God forgive me for my sins, through what Jesus did for me on the cross," she said lowly. Suddenly, she realized…
The Spirit was gently nudging her heart again. "Stephanie…I love you."
"Really, God?" she prayed silently, as D.J. and she joined in prayer. "But, why? You know what I said to Michelle. I don't deserve it. You shouldn't have to love me."
"Nobody can earn it. It is all through My grace. That means it's something that is given with no expectation that it can ever be repaid. Remember that prayer for Mr. Bear?"
"Yes, I do…Lord, I know you're busy. But, our little sister Michelle is hurt. God, I'm sorry I made such a mess of things. I'll never fight with her again, Lord, I'll give her everything of mine, I'll give her all my cookies and let her bug me all the time."
"Stephanie, I want to give this to you. Freely. But, you are trying to earn My favor; I can't give you a free gift if you insist on paying for it. It wouldn't be free then. What did you learn about My love, just like your dad's love that time with Joey's car?"
"It's always there. And, I couldn't earn it if I tried?" She was right. "Then I'm confused – what do you want?"
"I want a willing heart, but this prayer is for something far more serious than Mr. Bear's return. I want you to admit you need My help."
"Lord," Stephanie prayed, following D.J., "we need Your help. I need Your help. I want us to be a family, together again. I'm sorry for all I've done wrong, and I lay that at Your feet. I believe You forgive me. I want the chance to make things right!"
Their prayer was interrupted by a grim medic coming out into the waiting room; "Mr. Tanner, we're doing all we can." He explained what they were doing, and what they needed to do. He didn't want to say the word "hopeless," but he did say, "She's still unconscious. We're just waiting to see what happens. We almost lost her once, though, and the situation…well, we just have to wait and see." He sighed. "If any of you know how to pray…now would be a good time."
The middle Tanner girl began weeping. Once he left, Stephanie darted away from the others and found a private corner of the waiting room, where this time, she knelt and began sobbing. Danny was totally lost, still blaming himself. Jesse consoled him, and stopped Joey from following her, saying, "She just needs a little time to herself." Seeing D.J. sitting next to her, trying to pray herself, Jesse said, "Maybe they know what to do better than any of us."
In the spiritual realm, Stephanie was beside herself. "Lord, what's wrong; why isn't my prayer working?"
Suddenly, she felt a calming voice; this time, of her mother. "It's okay, Dear," Pam said soothingly.
It reminded her of a time she was four, and had gotten a cut falling from the tree she was climbing. "But why isn't it getting any better!?"
"Things take time, sweetheart. Things take time." She let Pam cuddle her as the sting from the disinfectant worked; it still hurt, but she was in her mother's tender embrace, that's what mattered.
Back in the present, hunched over in fervent prayer, Stephanie felt the same sort of tender touch as she cried and tried to focus on prayer, while D.J. soothingly rubbed her back and tried to pray herself.
Stephanie asked, "How much longer do I have to pray? What do I have to do so she comes out of this? Lord, I pray that swelling goes down. I want her to recover; please, give me another chance, give her another chance."
"Stephanie," came the soothing, tender, and compassionate…"voice" wasn't the right word. But, a calming Spirit that surrounded Stephanie with the peace that passes understanding. "Do you notice all those 'I's and 'me's?"
"Yeah. I thought we were supposed to come boldly to you. Like I did for Mr. Bear."
"I allowed that to happen so you would pray and I could build your faith. But, Stephanie, Whose will is to be done on earth, as it is in Heaven?"
Stephanie sniffled. "Your will."
"Yes. My dear, I love you. I want to help you become more gracious, understanding…"
"It's Gia, isn't it?" Stephanie said, again trying to bargain. "I knew it! Lord, I'm sorry, I know I've let her influence me a lot…I'll stop being friends with her right away, I promise, I'll go back to being the way I was in grade school, when I had so much more fun hanging out with Michelle…"
"Calm down, my child," the Spirit soothed her peacefully. "You are trying to bargain instead of seeking My will. This can be used to glorify Me to Gia, and help her. I love her, too. I long for her to feel better about herself so she'll treat others better, like that boy she told you to be mean to after he stood you up, when you knew it wasn't right. You have helped her already, as I knew you could if you chose, when I brought you together."
"Lord," they heard Stephanie pray in the physical world, "what is it You want? What will it take to make Michelle wake up and be okay? I don't understand, Lord, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the wrong I've done, and I throw myself totally on Your mercy. Please, help me. I don't know how to pray here, I'm totally lost."
"That is where I want you to start," the Spirit assured her. "Relying totally on Me. Because this is one of those times when it takes very fervent, effectual prayer."
"God, I know it's a lot to ask. The injuries might be too much for people, but Lord, You made me and her. You can fix her, You can heal her brain. Take down the swelling, please, Lord…." Stephanie prayed for a minute, two minutes, five minutes, and more, alternating between praying, and feeling the Spirit calming her and guiding her, pleading about numerous specifics involved with the situation – that the swelling go down, that there be no damage, that Michelle be able to function perfectly, that she be as good as if she'd never been hurt. And, that they have another chance, as she'd prayed when seeking His forgiveness for what she'd said.
The spiritual warfare was intense, but Stephanie and others were fighting it by asking to work as He led them to ask, knowing what He wanted to accomplish, and letting them be able to be part of getting it done.
The doctors were discouraged as they noticed their patient still in a coma. But, suddenly, one of them said, "Say, doesn't it look like the swelling is going down?"
They all looked for a moment at the monitors. "Someone up there must like us…"
In the Spiritual realm, Michelle saw numerous others, but especially Stephanie, praying "in the breach," as it were. Interceding on behalf of her, asking that she be spared, with Stephanie finally ending a very long, tearful, and thoughtful prayer by asking the Lord to take her in Michelle's place, and allow Michelle to live, if it would be His will, as she would gladly give her life to spare her sister. "Nonetheless…" - and this was the hardest thing she prayed all day, but God knew it would be, and helped her to say it, she was human - "let Thy will be done, whatever Your will is for her. In Jesus' name, Amen."
"I better go back," Michelle remarked. "Stephanie's going to be heartbroken if I stay here." She looked around her once more. "But, it's so beautiful here …the sights, the sounds, the smells…everything is so amazing!"
"That's why the Apostle Paul said the experience of the 'third heaven' was so amazing, it couldn't be uttered. It wasn't illegal as in against the law, it was just against his nature as a person to be able to explain. We can express ourselves up here about how amazing it is," Pam explained. "But, you're going to be limited down there."
"I know…it's going to be so hard to leave this place."
"I know. It won't be near the same down there. But, when you trust Christ with all your heart, my dear, you can know one day you will be here forever, with the angels and me…and Him." They hugged, and Michelle felt herself started to slip back into her body again.
But, her mind was still focused on what had been above; she would have amnesia for a week, as she struggled with remembering the finite, imperfect people of the world, after being with those who had been made complete, with no sin, in Heaven.
"Doctor…the swelling is gone!" The entire operating room cheered.
"This…is a miracle," the doctor said. "If this keeps up, in a few minutes, I should be able to go out and tell the family she's awake." He couldn't find words for it himself; he supposed he would just have to announce she was awake to the family.
"…And, Lord, please let her recover completely," Stephanie was praying after what seemed like only a few minutes to her, resting in the arms of the Almighty, but what was well over half an hour to the outside world.
In the spiritual realm, Stephanie had just one more question. "What if I hadn't prayed?"
"But, I knew you would, my dear. I made you, and knew the choices you would make, as I have always known the choices My children would make. I knew how to work with those choices to make all things work together for good. I know what all people will do and think. It's very sad for Me, but I must give people free will to make bad choices sometimes, so they can be people and not robots. But, I knew that many would pray, and that that prayer would be decisive in winning the spiritual battle for her life."
"I prayed harder because of our fight, huh?" She had. "Harder than I would have?"
"The fervent, effectual prayer of a righteous person availeth much. Yours would have been fervent without that. The fight seemed bad at the time, it seemed meant unto evil, but I allowed it so if you chose, it could be used unto good."
"Thank you, Lord, for listening. And I promise, well…I know I'll struggle. But, please help me to not snap at anyone or say mean stuff again, and help me always to forgive…"
"In Jesus' name, Amen." The family watched with wonderment as Stephanie stood, wiped the tears from her face, and inhaled deeply. Finally, she said with some certainty, "She'll be okay." She wasn't sure how long it would take, and still felt a little worried for a few minutes; but, she had prayed believing, that was the important thing. The others focused on the problem that, as far as they knew, Michelle was "still unconscious."
When the doctor came and said "she just woke up," he didn't know what else to say. Normally, when someone was out for hours, they couldn't wake up and suddenly be totally alert, except for her amnesia. But, somehow, she was.
He would save that explanation for later. Now, Danny, Jesse, and Joey went upstairs, while Stephanie, D.J., and their Aunt Becky – Jesse's wife - silently prayed, and talked.
They kept Michelle at the hospital for observation till the following Friday, to make sure everything was okay. They figured it was amnesia, but it was odd, as nothing seemed to be wrong otherwise. When Stephanie convinced her to nap in her own bed, she thought she remembered something about her, and her "memory" came back, but the rest of the story wasn't told till that evening.
"There's your mom bringing you home from the hospital." Michelle smiled as they looked through a few photo albums, among the many on the wall opposite the staircase in the living room. Everyone was there but D.J., who had left for her prom, and Nicky and Alex – Jesse and Becky's twins had just gone to bed.
"She's just like I remember her."
Danny was suddenly worried again. She'd been recalling everything else perfectly, as it was a much more laid back time now that they knew her memory was back. "Uh, Michelle…she died…"
"When I was a baby. I know."
"Uh…Michelle…when you say you remember her…" Stephanie didn't know where to begin, an unusual thing for her, as she was normally so talkative.
"Oh, my…"
Jesse had the same thought as Danny at that instant. "Michelle, the doctors said they almost lost you. Were you…"
"I don't know. It's kind of blurry now."
"Take your time," Becky said softly.
"I know you all want to hear about it. I just can't describe it. Except…Mom said everything tastes like chocolate; even the broccoli!" Michelle smiled and said, "She says she sends her love. I…might have seen you all praying, too."
Stephanie picked her up and sat her on her lap. "Michelle, I was praying, harder than I've ever prayed. I was so scared. And, I promise, I'm going to be a lot nicer." And, she kept that promise.
"I know. It was just so amazing. I didn't want to leave. I kept thinking about it…And I was scared of how different it would be back here. Then, I remembered you guys. But, still…I can't describe it, but this is nothing like it was there."
Danny turned to the others. "Which would explain why her amnesia lasted longer than it usually would for the fact her memory came back so fast."
"Well, Michelle, I know this planet's boring compared to where you were." Joey shifted to Kermit the Frog's voice. "It's not easy being green. But, it's still a lot of fun."
Michelle giggled. "I know. I want to go to church tomorrow, and learn more about where I was." Danny said they could do whatever she wanted. They didn't go to church often, but those who weren't at the hospital had the previous Sunday.
"You know, we had a show about near death experiences once," Becky said. She and Danny hosted "Wake Up, San Francisco," a local TV talk show. "I wonder why some people talk about a bright light and describe things, while others are like Michelle here, and can't really describe anything."
"Maybe it's that childlike faith trusting in Jesus; it got her past some hurdle from what the human mind can know to what we can't know; I don't know," Jesse responded. "I know it's gotta be hard to share the specifics. It'd be like trying to tell our dog, Comet how much fun it is to play music in a band; even if I had the words to translate into barks for him, how could I get the ideas across?" Everyone agreed.
Several years later, everyone was preparing for D.J.'s and Steve's wedding. "Do you need any more help?" Michelle asked.
"No, we're all set," D.J. said. She beamed proudly at Michelle. "I'm so proud of how good you've been, and how much you've helped – with Nicky and Alex, too. You sure have become a great support for Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky, with them adopting a couple years ago." Michelle thanked her.
"Yeah, except I used to think Stephanie was a do-gooder, till you came back and made her seem like me," Gia teased her.
"What's wrong with doing good things? It's fun," Michelle said.
Gia admitted that it was. "I guess I have learned some from you; though I'd rather listen to Stephanie lecture me about stuff."
"Come on, Gia," Stephanie said, "it's still hard, after where she was, to get used to being down here with us imperfect people." Stephanie mussed Michelle's hair a bit and said, "It makes you just as mad when you mess up as anything, huh?"
"Yeah, it does. That's why I try to tell Gia I'm not perfect. I'm just forgiven. And, she has been, too, now," Michelle said optimistically.
"She's learning, Michelle. It's a lot harder for her because of all the things she went through growing up." They walked into the Tanner living room, and sat on the couch. Stephanie put her arm around her. "But, you've got the chance to help lots of people on our level. Even if you can't explain it; just like Uncle Jesse couldn't explain music to Comet."
----------------------------------
Danny Tanner tossed and turned in his bed. He woke with a start, and realized he was hearing a bunch of dogs barking the tune to "Jingle Bells." "That's why I thought about explaining music to Comet," he told himself, recognizing the sound came from one of Joey's tapes. Nicky and Alex were playing it as Jesse and Becky carried them upstairs after a midnight snack. At first, it sounded like it was coming from the girls' room.
Which made him remember the dream. He darted over there to make sure…yes, it was only a few weeks after the accident, not a few years. "Oh, good, you're okay, right?"
"You mean we're awake, don't you?" Michelle asked, figuring he wanted to make sure they hadn't been awakened by the tape; though they had. "Wait a minute, my clock says 1 AM. I guess Nicky and Alex woke us up."
"Uh, Michelle, I think he had a bad dream," Stephanie said as she got up. She recalled how scared D.J. had been for him a year ago after a date dumped him, thinking he could be "wandering the strets sad and alone." Her dad did get anxious at times; she supposed she'd inherited some of that. "Care to talk about it?" she asked lovingly, but with a smile, too, at the irony of helping her father like that. It figured, she supposed, with their mother having died eight years ago.
"Well, just…how long was Michelle out after her accident?"
Stephanie understood. "I know the feeling, Dad. Trust me, it was a bit less than twenty minutes. She started to wake up in the ambulance, only you probably didn't notice when you rode with her. The paramedics said something about you wanting to clean stuff in the back because you were nervous."
"Right. Good." He inhaled deeply. "I know you've had a couple scary ones, and you've helped comfort Michelle after a few she's had since she knows she forgets about a week of her life now. But, when you're a parent…it just gets worse."
"I'm sure it does, just from how protective I've felt."
"You can have one of my stuffed animals," Michelle offered.
"Thanks. It might have helped more if I talked to one right after your mom died. You remember you never saw her, right?" Michelle said she knew she'd never seen her, except in pictures, and asked why he asked. He told them what he dreamed. "It all worked out okay. But, I'm just so glad it wasn't that bad."
Stephanie confessed, "Well, I did pray a lot – we all did, since the ER was so busy we never heard anything had changed since she was wheeled in there hours earlier. And, I did say the part about planning to sing 'You Are My Sunshine' for hours on end." They shared a tender laugh. "That's just like me, huh?"
"I know. You know, we talk about how you inherited Mom's excitability; I think you got some of my anxiety, too, though thankfully not my cleaning obsession." Stephanie agreed. "I'm just glad everything turned out okay. It's something we really need to be thankful for."
"I know. God knows how to make all things work together for good, doesn't he?"
The thought reminded him a little of the dream yet, but thankfully that was fading. Instead, he simply agreed that, "We've made it this far. I'm sure we'll make it through everything else, too." They all hugged before going back to bed.