A.N. Hi. This is my first FanFic. Actually, it's the first thing I've ever written so any comments would be appreciated. Hopefully it's not too bad! This subject has probably been done to death, but again, my first attempt at this so didn't want to try anything too complicated! Hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: Mass Effect and all characters belong to BioWare.

Garrus took a deep breath before opening the door to port observation. Kasumi was, as usual, lounging on one of the sofas, it had taken Garrus some time to get used to having the thief aboard the Normandy, he C-Sec training kicking in no doubt, he was used to her now though and had even come to enjoy her habit of sneaking around the ship cloaked only to disable it in front of crew members making them jump, only after getting the latest bit of ship gossip of course. Plus, if Shepard trusted her that was good enough for him. A quick glance around showed no one else in the room. He raised a brow plate at Kasumi, giving him a sly smile back and a pointed look at the floor below the large observation window, she gracefully slid from the sofa and slipped past him out the door. Normally this was a conversation she'd love to listen in on, Shepard had, however, quickly cottoned onto her cloak and Kasumi knew her new friend would never talk to Garrus properly if she even suspected Kasumi would be listening in.

Garrus edged toward the window and there she was, laying flat on her back on the floor. Staring at her upside down, perplexed, he cleared his throat,

"Shepard, why are you on the floor?"

"Its a meditation technique Samara showed me" she answered,

"And you need to be on the floor for that? Is it working?" he asked, tilting his head to the side

"Not really" she finally opened her eyes to grin up at him, "but my head isn't really up to relaxing with a drink so..." she patted the floor next her in silent invitation. Sprawling out on the floor next to her her realised why she'd chosen this spot, the view through the window was amazing.

"So, how is the head?" he asked after a few moments of companionable silence,

"Eh, what's one more bruise right?" She chuckled, "You should have seen Doc's face when I told her how I got this one though!"

"Well if you ARE going to headbutt Krogan you are kinda asking for a headache," he chuckled back.

"Hey, he was asking for it! Grunts no real Krogan my ass!" mock indignation aside, Garrus knew how much she cared about Grunt. Following her lead half the crew seemed to have adopted him as part little brother, part mascot, if you ignored the giant shotgun on his back that is.

"No one insults your baby?"

"Damn right!" she said, still grinning up at the stars,

"You always did have a soft spot for Krogan," he said, nudging her shoulder with his, "Wrex seems to be doing well, even if he does have an almost impossible task ahead of him, I almost can't believe that's the same mercenary we picked up all those years ago on the citadel."

"I can," she smiled fondly in memory, "All that talk of how his people were a lost cause, I knew it was all bluster, he's going to turn his people around, just watch. Or just kill the opposition, you know either way, kinda wish we could have hung around to watch it"

"But the galaxy wont save itself, right?" The grin was sliding off her face, quick Vakarian subject change, "Did you restock on Ryncol while we there? I still can't believe you drink that stuff!"

"Bars fully stocked and ready to go!" She'd brightened again, "Remember when Wrex challenged me to that drinking contest on the SR-1?"

"Actually Shepard, what I remember is you claiming, loudly, I might add, that you were so desperate for a drink after the Thorian that you could drink a Krogan under the table!"

"Pfft! Semantics!" she replied, waving a hand at the ceiling, "I did OK though, I only have the one set of organs remember, and Wrex was pretty drunk by the time I had to admit defeat, I seem to remember him grabbing me in a bone crushing hug and declaring me an honorary Krogan before we passed out"

"YOU passed out Shepard, YOU! And I know this because I had to get Wrex into his sleeping pod after you were finished with him, do you have any idea how much he weighs? Still, better than last time, you should have seen him after-" damn, he'd done it now.

"After what?" she turned her head, looking at the side of his face,

Closing his eyes briefly, he muttered "after your funeral"

A quiet little "Oh" was all she said before turning her head to look back at the stars, her eyes had glazed over now though, looking but not seeing. Garrus knew she hadn't talked about her death to anyone, not really. Whenever she was asked about it she answered the questions as quickly as possible and looked for any way to change the subject.

"Look Shepard, I'm-"

"What was it like?" She cut straight across his apology, the quiet thoughtful voice wasn't one he'd ever heard from her before, was Commander Shepard nervous? It chilled him to his very core. This was the person who'd saved the Citadel, saved the council, hell, saved him! And she was nervous to ask him a question? He knew there were videos still up on the extranet, she could have watched the full thing if she'd wanted to. But she didn't, he realised, she asked you. His heart seemed to still in his chest. He swallowed past the large lump that had formed in his throat and starred at the ceiling for a long moment, and just when it looked like he wouldn't answer he said,

"You'd have hated it Shepard," she let out a huff at that and Garrus started to feel more confident, maybe he'd needed to talk about it too. "Yeah, you'd have hated it. Hundreds of people turned up, the streets around the plaza were full of people and they were broadcasting it live over the extranet. They'd put a stage up at the Presidium with chairs all lined up in front of it, a podium, white roses everywhere. Didn't know you were a fan of white roses." he said, half teasing.

"Ha, I'm not! Give me something bright and colourful any day, sun flowers were always my favourite."

"Huh, I seem to remember you mentioning that at some point actually. Anyway, they'd gone all out! They had this photo blown up of you, I could hardly believe it was you, must have been taken straight out of the academy, big cheesy grin for the camera, your hair was longer then too," he said reaching up to give her hair an affectionate tug.

"Ugh," she pulled a face, "I always hated that picture."

"Anyway," he continued, getting serious again, "Hackett stood at the podium and started giving a speech, he talked about your accomplishments, what happened to you on Elysium, all the non classified stuff anyway. How you'd made your parents proud when you enlisted. And of course how you'd saved the council from Saren and the Geth." His voice started to harden, even after over two years, he was still angry about what had happened, "Then the council stepped up, they thanked you off course, thanked you for putting an end to the Geth threat and making the galaxy safe again. Not one word about the damned reapers. That was when they started to rid the galaxy of your warnings, of Sovereign, of everything you'd told them."

Shepard let out a sigh, "I expected nothing else from them, they're not going to accept the truth until the reapers turn up on our doorstep. What happened next?"

"Well a few more notable people from the alliance said a few words, all about your career, commendations, etcetera. Then, it was our turn."

Shepard turned her head to really look at him for the first time since he'd started the story,

" Anderson had approached Alenko a few days earlier, asked if someone from the crew would like to say a few words at the ceremony. He'd told him that the alliance brass wouldn't be too happy about aliens speaking at your service but this wasn't about them, it was about you. So Alenko had got in touch with all of us, asked us if there was anything we had to say. It was amazing Shepard, you'd have been proud. Even Tali stood there in front of all those people and told the galaxy how you'd taken some kid on her pilgrimage under your wing, shown her all the amazing things the galaxy had to offer. Liara spoke of how you'd saved her life, helped her move on from her mothers death and showed her to look to the future, not just the past. Wrex was actually eloquent, well as eloquent as he can get, he spoke of your strength, on and off the battlefield. The nerve to stand toe-to-toe with a Krogan and the quad to talk one down, he actually used the word 'quad' too, I thought Hackett and the council were going to pass out right there, you should have seen Anderson try to hide his grin though. Kaiden went last, he looked the council right in the eye and told them your death would mean something, they needed to prepare now because they've just lost their best chance against the Reapers. They hustled us off the stage pretty quick after that!" he was grinning again now. "We went back to our seats, front row thanks to Anderson, and stood a parade rest for the rest of the service. No way were they going to forget what we'd said."

He turned his head to look her in the eye finally, her bright green eyes looked brighter than normal, shining in the dim light of the observation deck.

"Thank you Garrus" she said roughly, reaching a hand down to grab his hand in hers.

"Any time Shepard," he said, squeezing her fingers.

Turning back to the window they were quiet for a long moment, just enjoying the comfortable quiet between them. For the first time since waking up in that Cerberus lab Shepard actually felt at peace.

Garrus' mind was mercifully blank, his brain had been filled with nothing but getting revenge for his squad since they'd been killed. But now, with Shepards small fingers wrapped around his, the voices finally quietened.

"So, where'd the Ryncol come into this?" Shepard asked after a few minutes.

Garrus laughed, startled from his revere, "After it was all over the crew headed to Chora's, we pretty much drank the place dry between us." He didn't mention Jokers tears. The two fights Wrex had picked, just to have something to punch. The fact that even after six or seven drinks Kaiden still hadn't said a word to anyone since leaving the Presidium. Tali and Liara quietly comforting each other. He didn't mention how lost he felt, how he finally felt the hole her death had left in his life.

"And...well I guess that's it," he finished, shrugging his large shoulders.

Letting out a sigh Shepard said, "Well, it's getting late, I better..."

"Yeah. Me too. Still want me watching your back for Pragia tomorrow?" Garrus asked, reluctant to move now.

"As always," She smiled, stretching and releasing Garrus hand to climb back to her feet. She then reached out the same hand to pull Garrus to his feet too. He ended up closer to her than he expected, close enough that he should feel uncomfortable but strangely he didn't. Instead he noticed again how small she was as he towered over her

"Goodnight Garrus," she smiled up at him, giving his hand one last squeeze,

"Goodnight Shepard," he replied as he watched her leave the room.

As soon as Shepard entered her quarters she headed for her desk. It hadn't escaped her notice that Garrus had failed to mention what he had said at the service. Before she lost her nerve she pulled up the footage of her funeral. She skipped the Alliance brass speeches. She knew her own achievements thank you very much, and had the scars to prove it. Well, had being the operative word, she thought ruefully. And there they were, her crew, her friends and adoptive family. Lined up in front of her picture, yeah she really hated that picture, and an empty white coffin. She repressed a shudder and instead focused on the rag tag bunch taking turns at the podium.

Garrus had spoken just before Kaiden. Putting the vid on play she held her breath as she watched him begin. It was short, perfect and so very Garrus.

" Shepard was many things, compassionate, tough, brave, loyal, unique. But to me, to us, she was simply "Shepard". She made us all better just by making us want to be more like her, and we are less without her. She was the best of us."

He left the podium with his head held high, his spine straight. But on his way back to his spot between Wrex and Tali he stopped by the empty coffin. Curious Shepard zoomed in then felt her breath catch in her throat as she watched Garrus pull a single sunflower out of his armour and lay it gently on top of the empty coffin.