Star Starer
A seventeen year old witch, Lily Evans stood wrapped in a blanket at her dorm window. She stared up at the clear, dark sky, dotted with shining stars and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and silently so as not to disturb her sleeping dorm mates. The stars and the vast emptiness of the night sky made her feel insignificant, like nothing she did would have much effect on a cosmic scale. This was a welcome change from her day to day life where she felt that people relied on her too much which made her feel like she had the power to destroy their lives, if only for a second, and she hated that feeling.
She tutored younger students. She did all of the extra credit assignments for her classes. She pointed students in the right direction when they got lost. She gave advice when people piled their troubles on her shoulders. She helped her friends with homework. She rearranged patroling when someone was double booked, even the Slytherins.
And she did all of this because she was Head Girl and it was expected. She did it because she had always done it, just to prove she could, to all those people who called her a 'worthless mudblood'. She did it because she was a good friend.
Her friends were lovely people, but they always seemed to have trouble with one aspect of regular adolescent life, whether it was boys or homework. And they all seemed to think Lily could help them no matter what the query. It was true she gave sound advice when it came to her friends' troubles but sometimes wished that she could disappear from the world and not care about anything for a change.
Interestingly enough only two things had ever made her feel like this, her star staring contemplation of the world and interactions of any sort with James Potter, Head Boy, Quidditch Captain, Marauder and prankster. Lily had openly detested the boy for the duration of their fifth and sixth years due to his apparent need to hex unsuspecting students including her former friend and Slytherin (wierd, a Slytherin and a Gryffindor friends) Severus Snape and inability to hold his tongue regarding his desire for her to date him. This love/hate relationship had proved a point of hilarity for their fellow students and an escape from the world for Lily.
Since the commencment of seventh year however things had changed and everyone knew it. James had grown up and their once explosive rows had now dwindled to minor disagreements over things like the dates for Hogsmeade weekends or Prefect patrols.
Their being forced to work together had proved a good thing, something Lily had very much doubted. Now, while she was with him she found that she could forget the world which she had always associated with feeling completely at ease and safe. This revelation had startled her at first but now she was used to it and was comfortable with it, somehting she would never have guessed even a year ago.
Lily smiled and buried her cold nose in the blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she stared up at the twinkling stars. If star staring had taught her anthing it was that nothing as trivial as her insignificant life would truly have an impact on the cosmic balance.
Feeling safe in the knowledge that her life was a tiny speck in the universe barely worth acknowledging, she left her position staring at the stars and finally crawled into her warm, waiting, welcoming bed and promptly fell asleep.