Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to Fire Emblem or any other video game series. Fire Emblem is own by Nintendo and Intelligent System I
don't own E! True Hollywood Stories as well. E! owns the series. This is more of a rip-off/parody of True Hollywood Stories
This fanfiction is rated M for sexual reference, drugs, strong language, suicide reference, and violence.
Also, I must note that I'm also going to poke fun at different topics and other things such as wiggers (White people who act black), thugs, emo bands, rappers, feminist activate groups, major cities, celebrity sex tapes, and many topic in a satire way. Look people, this is just satire, I'm not trying to offend or put down anyone. If you got offended over the topics of the satire remarks of this story, guess what? I don't give a damn.
It's obviously you are just politically correct and lack the understanding of humor in a different way. So if you have a stick up your ass and want to flame me, you will be debunked. Besides, I just a black kid still in school, I don't have time to waste of morons who can't understand humor or satire.
True Nintendo Stories- Fire Emblem 4.
In a television studio somewhere in the Nintendo universe, a taping of a new Nintendo series was being film. The new series you ask? The series is called "True Nintendo Stories", which tell true stories of many Nintendo characters such as Mario, Donkey Kong, Captain Falcon, Link, Mars (Marth) and many more. Today filming would tell the story of Fire Emblem 4, the best selling game of the Fire Emblem series, ever. In the mini-studio were the was nothing more than a simple room, dim with lights, a stool in the middle and cameras, which were turned off for the moment, pointing towards the lone stool.
The cameramen were making final adjustments, double-checking everything, checking if things and items were in place and without flaw. "Is everything all right? I don't want anything to happen for the show." The producer, director, and host of the show asked one of the set crew. "Yes sir. Everything is perfect, up and running." One of the technical workers replies back to the host.
"Good. Tell everyone we'll start filming in five minutes from now, on time." The host told the worker. "Okay everyone! You heard the boss! Filming shall start in five minutes! Get in your places!" The crewman yelled out. Everyone ran to his or her assigned place, setting up, preparing for the show. 'Guess that means I must get ready myself.' The host thought, as he sat on the stool, looking at the cameras that were focused on him. The host was a 6'1, African-American sixteen-year-old youth. His attire was a light blue flashy suit and a blue dress shirt underneath and a blue pimp hat. You gotta add the pimp hat.
His hair was short and black, a bit fading as well. Light brown was the color of his eyes, even though it could turn to a shade a dark brown. The host's calls himself "Mr. SnowStorm", obviously not his real name, but he likes to call himself that, as a pun towards his real last name, "Snow". With that little useless information aside, the show was about to begin.
"Filming starts in 5!" The director of the camera crew raise his hand, put all five fingers up, as he counted down, he lower a finger until he got to one. He pointed his index finger towards Mr. SnowStorm, symbolizing to the host to start speaking in a clam voice towards the camera. Filming began and everything with down without a hitch.
"Fire Emblem, one of Nintendo and Strategy RPG most well known name in the gaming world today. Fire Emblem is acclaimed as one of Nintendo's greatest game series of all time. Adding to that fact is Fire Emblem 4, the top selling Fire Emblem game of all time, yet never seen the light of American, unless you count those nerds illegally making bootlegs of the game for download on the net, translating to English, but who cares? Here's a little history of Fire Emblem 4.
Fire Emblem 4 tells a tale about a hero name Siglud, a holy knight in his personal quest to save Lady Eddin, which ultimately leads to Siglud's and some random unknown Nintendo characters wanting to end the evil birthed by the Luptous Cult. Sadly, Siglud failed at his mission and as life as well. Fate gave Siglud and his knights a deathblow, which deal the card of death. Poor Siglud life was ended when Alvis, an evil fellow with a unoriginal plan killed Siglud and most of his crew, taking off with Siglud's wife, Diadora, taking her to be his (Alvis) own wife, and thus fate gave Alvis a nice card: To be emperor of all of Grandbell.
Many years later, Celice, Siglud and Diadora's son, wanting to be some random hero took up arms with some friends to liberate the dying countries of Grandbell. This event leaded to some random epic battles and events. Battles such as Celice getting revenge of the death of his pops by killing Alvis, Yuria, the half-brother of Celice and the daughter of Alvis and Diadora and her twin brother Yurius, the reincarnation of the Loputus dragon lord. In the end, Yurius was slain, Celice has been crowned king of all of Grandbell, people rejoiced, and Celice's army parted their ways. The Fire Emblem 4 cast soon lived in peace and happiness . . . Or did they?
Not everything ended in peach and happiness after the end of the production of Fire Emblem 4. Prince Sety, the son of Levin had held raunchy sex parties in his castle in Silesia, a party that would lead to Princess Zelda of Hyrule pregnant with Sety's child and his divorce with his ex-lover, Tinny. Ares attempt to enter the gangsta rap game with his new rap name "Black Knight", but things has failed for him, he still struggle to earn fame in gangsta rap, to the point, he became a wigga. There's also a sex tape on the net that is completely rotting the Hezul Royal Family.
This sex tape is more dreadful than the infamous Paris Hilton sex tape. King Elstoshan hittin' it with his own sister, Princess Lakesis. It is a Photoshopped attempt to ruin the Royal Hezul's name? Is it a badly drawn hentai? Or could it be true that Elstoshan truly a redneck, having sex with his own sister?
Also, coming up, see how Siglud almost ruined his life due to drugs, alcohol, and beating his wife, Diadora, which, sadly ended with Diadora's suicide, but who cares? She sucked in the game anyway. Anyway, see how Celice, Yuria, Finn, Patty, and Noish new emo band "Dawn of the Sinners" formed and why they suck, but hey, emo music is just crap, just like mainstream rap.
Then later, you'll hear from Lex, Prince Leaf, Cuan, and other Fire Emblem and Nintendo characters charge with steroid abuse, because taking steroids will make you video game awesome. Finally, I'll interview Ira on her new women rights activist group; the W.F.I.I.G (Women Fighting Inequality in Games). Ira join forces with renown women of gaming such as Princess Daisy, Marle of Chrono Trigger, Terra Brandford of Final Fantasy III/VI, and Lara Corft of the Tomb Raider series, fighting to end inequality towards women in the gaming business. These topics, and various others as True Nintendo Stories- Fire Emblem 4 returns after two minutes of break."
"And. . . CUT! That's a warp for right now! Everyone take two and come back before two minutes break is up!" Shouted one of the directors. "Whew!" Mr. SnowStorm sighs for a second, and spoke to one of the director, the world famous plumber, Mario. "So, do you think the first episode will do any good? You think things might go well?" Snowstorms ask the short, plum stereotypical Italian. "Let's a see. You pissed off most of the Fire Emblem 4 cast members by exposing their private lives to the media and public, you, along with some animators made that fake sex tape hentai of Elstoshan and Lackesis, which you paid Peach, youself and I to do the voice-overs. Umm . . . everything else is great though. Well done, Mr. SnowStorm for your first show. But aren't you upset that Diadora committed suicide recently? You know, after she had heard the you expose some of this, mostly about how Siglud used to beat her and Celice?"
Mario asked Mr. SnowStorm. SnowStorm paused for a monument when Mario had brought up Diadora's suicide." Well, to answer the first part of the question yep, although most of the shit I put was either lies, or true facts about the Fire Emblem 4 cast that they don't want to get out. I swear that people will look at Fire Emblem in a different way now once this show airs. The cast with Diadora committed suicide, I don't give a monkey shit, and neither does the other Nintendo or Fire Emblem crew, expect for the ones who are so stupid to give sorrow for a soul that took itself out of this world like.
Hell, there are some people outside of Nintendo like Sonic, Crash Bandicoot, or Cloud don't give a damn that Diadora ended her own life. Don't know why Celice or Yuria is trying to sue me for their mother's "suffering" after I expose the shit, both of them can go to hell with their mother for all I care. Anyone who commits suicide deserves to spend their afterlife with the flames of hell and Satan himself. " The tone of Mr. SnowStorm's voice was cold when Mario had brought up the suicide of Diadora. SnowStorm doesn't really give a damn for those who ended their own life, he believes that suicide is for cowards and men with no guts.
"Wow, that was… wow." Mario just took a deep breath and shook his head. He than spoke up. "Can I ask you a stupid question?" Mario asks SnowStorm. "Sure, go ahead, and don't lecture me about people committing suicide and that I should fell sorry for them. " SnowStorm told Mario. "Hey, just a relax! I a not gonna lecture you! It's a just that, why I even in this fanfiction? I'm not even a Fire Emblem character!
Yeah, I might have whooped Prince Mars (Marth) and Roy's ass in the Super Smash Bros.: Melee tournament almost five years along, but that the only connection I have with Fire Emblem, besides being friends with most of the Fire Emblem stars and villains."
Snowstorm just laughed a bit. "Hey, this what happen when some fanfiction writers run dry in the Idea Well and make crap up! Besides, other famous game characters may or may not make a cameo in this story. Who knows? Maybe the author's writer's block might clear up and get a refill in his personal Idea Well." SnowStorm told Mario.
"Yo! Filming starts in less than thirty seconds! Get into places everyone!" Yelled one of the stage directors. "Guess like we need to get back to our post." Mr. SnowStorm told Mario. "Yeah." Mario walk off to his camera as Mr. SnowStorm went to sit on the stool." "All right! Filming starts in 5 . . .4. . 3. 2 . . .1!" Mario pointed to Mr. SnowStorm, who started to talk. "Welcome back to True Nintendo Stories-Fire Emblem 4. Early this month, I spoke with Siglud about his staring role in Fire Emblem 4, his feelings about working for Nintendo, his views on his son's new emo band, his opinion on fellow Nintendo co-workers such as Link, Donkey Kong, Luigi, and others. I also pointed out on why he almost ruined his life by drug use, the alleged beatings that he gave to his late wife, and Diadora's recent suicide. Let me tell ya, things got a little hot in the collar for both of us as I almost got a taste of his Taifang when I ask him these questions. "
END OF CHAPTER ONE
Author Notes: Yeah, I was quickly running out of ideas, so for no reason what-so-ever, and the fact I was bored, I put Mario in the story, even though obviously Mario isn't a Fire Emblem character. The Diadora suicide thing, I was running out of ideas, so I wanted to throw a bit of drama in, the fact she's the worse magic user in Fire Emblem 4, and I'm not a big fan of her, gameplay wise, or storyline wise. Please read(which, you already I assumed you did) and review. Oh, no negative reviews like "lol!11! ur story's gey! I could rite a betta story then u!" or flames, or any other bullshit if I bashed your favorite character(s). Just some advice, praise, or point out any errors and improvement I need to make.