Reverse

"For all the things my hands have held, the best by far is you."

-Cecilia and the Satellite, Andrew McMahon

Chapter 1

"You can't say that to my parents," Onodera rolled over on the bed and put his chin on Takano's abdomen, stretching his arms out in front of him and giving the other man a look that definitely said 'No Way' without the actual words. "You want them to like you, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah," the older man sighed and put a hand on Ritsu's hair in a gesture that had become more of a habit now that they lived together. "What a pain… meeting the parents. You're a grown ass man, why do we need their blessing?"

"We don't, but you said you wanted to meet them officially, still, we ended up putting it off for a lot longer than I expected I could get away with," Onodera placed a small kiss on the other's skin before he propped himself up and leaned in for a kiss. He had reluctantly started to ease into a state of comfort where he was fine being so casually intimate with this person. From the beginning he had always been sort of awkward, but it was becoming second nature to be close to Takano-san, so much that it was almost frightening.

"How did I even let you put it off for all these months?" Takano stopped their kiss, but he put his hand on Onodera's face and offered him a smile.

"I can be distracting," Onodera said simply, nodding his head.

"Incredibly so," the other pulled him back down for another kiss.

They were lying naked on their bed―their being the word Onodera still stumbled over. But he closed his eyes less tightly then he once would have, his shoulders tensed much less than they once would have, and his skin reddened just a little less than it once would have. Where he had once been tightly wound, Onodera was now relaxed in their moments of affection, but still his heart beat just a little quicker, and his stomach fluttered just like it always had―because really, there was nothing better than feeling a love that was easy and not anxious at all.

When he opened his eyes as he pulled back from the kiss, Onodera looked down at his one and only love and he smiled. It had been nearly eight months since what now felt only like a dream had inexplicably thrown him back in time into what he could only figure was a series of altered universes where subtle differences had been made to their history. Still, sometimes he would wake up gasping and he would look over almost frantically, the part of himself that was still afraid of waking up as his fifteen-year-old-self only relieved when he found his still adult boyfriend sleeping next to him.

"I know you don't want to tell them," Takano put his hand gently on Masamune's face. "I don't want to force you."

"No, no," Onodera tried not to shake his head. "It's fine. I just, I know already, that they will disapprove of us. They just want what is good for my father's company, they don't want me to be happy."

The older man tucked Onodera's hair back and he kissed him again. It made him happy to see the soft flush of Onodera's face, and it was easy to see the other's discomfort on the topic. "But I do. It's okay, I know I was not lenient on it being your choice, but I'm telling you now, we don't have to go see them and we don't have to tell them anything."

"No, it's okay. We can go, you can meet them, we'll go ...tomorrow," Onodera sat up and reluctantly pulled his lover's hands away from himself. "I think mother mentioned something about my father attending a conference over the weekend here in town. They were both invited."

"That's a bit sudden," the other sat up and gave him a look. "Tomorrow? Are you sure?"

"Yes, yes. We don't have to tell them, but it would be okay if you met them," Onodera said slowly. "And I guess... we can consider how it will go if we do tell them."

Takano gave him a look. "Like a test run?"

"Yeah…" Onodera took a deep breath. "Yes. I'll go call mother, she will insist we spend the night at the hotel. So, um, how do you feel about a business casual romantic getaway?"

The surprise was easily noticeable on Takano's expression but he accepted what Onodera said and still couldn't help to comment on it. "I guess you are serious, normally you would avoid speaking to her at all costs."

Onodera looked at him with a completely serious face. "That's because she is evil."

"Ritsu," Takano raised an eyebrow but smiled slightly.

"Yes, yes. I'm going," Ritsu stood up and yanked the bedsheet around his hips, but he turned almost gracefully and laughed. "I can just tell they're going to love you, what a pain in the ass."

"You're terrible," Onodera laughed and put a hand on his mouth to hide his face, but he looked at Takano adoringly and tried to contain himself. "You shouldn't be so mean to him, Takano-san, he's doing his best."

"His best my ass," Takano pulled out of the driveway and headed down the street. As he drove, he turned his hand up to Onodera and glanced over at him. "You and I both know Sayato-san can do much better he's just being a brat."

"You gave him three days to finish his manuscript, which he didn't seem to have started yet and doesn't need to be finished for another two weeks, and we told him we would be unavailable for the span of those unreasonable three days," but Onodera wasn't scolding him seriously and he put his hand over Takano's and laced their fingers together. "Doesn't that seem irresponsible?"

"He can do it," was all Takano said, staring stubbornly ahead with a straight face.

"He's a nineteen-year-old boy," Onodera pointed out.

"That is nearly two decades, he's almost twenty, not almost ten."

"You're too hard on him. Honestly, that is too much pressure from you."

"I think you're just too soft on him because he's cute."

"He is not."

"But he is," Takano looked over and smirked. "You like him because he looks like me, when we were younger and just as stupid."

Onodera leaned his head over and nudged Takano's neck. "Stop it. Besides, we were both highly intelligent, still are even in our old age," he joked.

"You know it's true," Takano teased him back. "Anyway, he'll be fine."

"If you didn't cause a mental breakdown," Onodera rolled his eyes. "Look at us, squabbling like an old married couple." He looked down at their linked hands and tightened his fingers around the other's, taking a deep breath before looking up at him. "We can't be like this around my parents, it will feel… strangely unnatural."

Takano was quiet at this and he brought Onodera's hand up to his lips and kissed it. "Then we will have to do what we can in the time alone we get. Hm, Ritsu?"

"M…Masamune," Onodera's small smile turned into a partial laugh and he leaned back in the seat of the car. "Takano-san," he corrected himself. "Please behave around my parents. You are not only meeting them as my parents, it will be a completely professional setting."

"You act like I haven't been to one of these things before," Takano gave his hand a gentle squeeze and sighed. "When I have in fact been to way too many."

"You and me both," Onodera couldn't help it, he leaned back over and kissed Takano's cheek. "Well, at least be thrilled that we only got one hotel room for the both of us."

"Yeah, don't mention that to your parents. Remember the time you were absolutely livid that we got only one room for the both of us?"

Onodera laughed. "I'm gonna call Haruki-san and tell him to take care of Sayato-san while we are gone."

Takano Masamune was undeniably in love with this beautiful person. He had realized a very long time ago that his small lover could always be described as beautiful. His hair was always soft and clean and his face was small with perfect features. His favorite part of him had once been his eyes, which were as crystal green as ever, but that had easily shifted to the way that Ritsu smiled at him now that they were together and how his face flushed with color when he did.

He really was the easiest distraction for Takano Masamune.

"Do you remember the last time we were in this hotel?" Onodera had just picked up their room keys from the desk and was leading them towards the elevator.

"How could I forget," Takano followed him into the elevator without protest. "Last year, you were very, very drunk."

"Who's fault was that?" Onodera handed the keys to him before he took out his mobile phone. "I have six missed messages from Sayato-san, look what you did you gave him anxiety."

Takano snorted but tried to stifle it when Onodera glared at him. "What? He's not alone, he has Haruki-san to help him."

The two of them stepped off the elevator and headed down the hall, following the fancy signs towards their room. When they stopped in front of a room, Onodera turned back to him, took back one key, and opened their door. "Haruki-san is only one assistant, Takano-san."

Takano closed the door behind them and immediately went to drop his bag on the luggage bench by the door. "I just want Sayato-san to confess to him already. You know they would be good together."

"Takano-san," Onodera turned to him and gave him a glare. "He'll tell him when he's ready."

"Yeah, after roundhouse kicking him in a moment of misunderstanding and disappearing for ten whole years," the older man muttered, but he was only joking and he walked over to where Ritsu stood by the bed and pulled him over into a kiss. "Like you confessed when you were ready?"

Onodera pouted up at him but kissed him again. "You're never gonna let that go, are you? The rain interrupted me, Takano-san, it was the rain!"

"Come on, let's get ready," Takano kissed him one more time before stepping back. "We did not spend nearly three hours last night discussing my wardrobe for nothing."

Onodera, Takano decided, looked and acted very much like he was raised by his parents. His shy and timid demeanor from when they had been in high school made a lot more sense after only five minutes sitting at the table with the older couple. He had always seemed like he was raised by a loving family and that had once not been far off. The frigid way he had carried himself when they had been reunited many years after that time was more understandable when Takano saw how stiffly Onodera's father stood and how firm his mother's face appeared.

He knew very little about Onodera's parents―Onodera Ryou was a tall man with straight features, his face was handsome and his hair was graying but he appeared to still be in great health. Takano knew he was the head of Onodera Publishing and therefore an incredibly busy and important man. His wife, Onodera Masuyo, was a smaller woman who shared her hair color with her son, as well as his shade of green eyes.

Though Takano was sure that he and Onodera's father had been at similar conferences and galas a handful of times before, it had never been necessary for them to directly cross paths. Despite his nerves from the beginning, Takano found that they actually got along quite well―Onodera's mother found him handsome and charming, and his father found his knowledge of literature impressive and his opinions on similar literature of interest refreshing.

But what was more entertaining was how relieved and also annoyed Onodera was by the fact that his parents, of course, almost adored the impressive editor in chief Takano Masamune.

"Are you staying in the hotel for the conference?" Onodera's mother put down her fork and dabbed the corner of her mouth with her napkin. She looked at Onodera expectantly.

"You know places like this make me uncomfortable, mom," Onodera had barely touched his food, though he kept up appearances by occasionally moving it around the plate with his fork. "The luxury is unnecessary."

Takano had been discussing one of their prominent new authors and a recent addition to the literature department of Marukawa with Onodera's father, but he became interested in Onodera's conversation with his mother.

"But you are staying for the weekend? We never see each other, we should have lunch tomorrow, Ritsu," his mother went on. "Discuss why you haven't found yourself a nice girl yet, or maybe why you rejected the one that I found for you."

"Mother," Onodera gave her a look. "Can we please not do that here?"

"If he doesn't want to be married, he doesn't have to be, Masuyo," Onodera-sama took a stab at a thin slice of grilled beef. "We already talked about this."

Takano watched Onodera be uncomfortable with an even face, but he decided not to speak.

"My work is very time consuming," was all Onodera said, sipping his drink and looking away.

"Yes, but if you just would accept taking over for your father you would have a better opportunity to meet a girl," his mother pointed out. "At least give me some grandchildren! And if we don't talk about this now we never will, you know, you never answer my phone calls."

It was easy to tell that Onodera was enduring the situation, but there was a small crease between his eyebrows and his mouth was pressed tightly closed. "Hm.."

"You just don't want to see me pleased, I suppose," his mother quipped, brushing off the jab with a light laugh. "I just don't really understand why you brought your co-worker to meet us and not a nice girl."

Takano watched Onodera put down his drink and stand up, possibly about to be done with this conversation. "Father insisted on knowing who I work with, this was not a social meeting, mother. And no, I will not have lunch with you tomorrow. Excuse me."

"Ritsu, don't be rude, sit down!"

It was surprising to see Onodera acting so brash or bold, but recently Takano had noticed that Onodera had become more confident with himself. He had originally found this attractive, but now it was just concerning. He stood up as well, finding no reason not to leave. "I apologize for that, please excuse us. It was a pleasure making your acquaintance."

"You're upset," Takano found Onodera upstairs out on the balcony of their room―they had splurged and booked one of the nicer ones of the hotel. They had a nice view of the city, and if you looked hard enough into the distance, the ocean on the horizon. He knew that Ritsu didn't like the fancy setting but had wanted to indulge him anyway.

Onodera was pacing back and forth, but he didn't seem anxious only saddened by something, walking at a leisure pace from one end of the balcony to the other thoughtlessly.

Takano thought he hadn't heard him, but the other turned back to the sky and sighed. "I'm not."

"But you are," he walked over to his small lover and wasn't sure if it was okay to approach him or not. "Are you okay? Is it okay to hold you?"

Onodera turned to him and his expression crumbled briefly before he shook his head. "I'm not upset! She doesn't upset me." He stomped past Takano and went over to his bag.

"So that's why you avoided her phone calls since you came to Marukawa then? Because I also avoid phone calls from people who definitely don't upset me," the taller man crossed his arms and followed Onodera back inside.

"I'm fine," Onodera looked around for his mobile.

"We didn't have to come here," he pointed out. "You are upset."

Onodera fussed with the zipper on his overnight bag before giving up on it and dropping his arms to his sides. "It doesn't feel real," he finally admitted. "Eight months ago…I… But I'm not upset!"

"Okay…? Ritsu, are you alright?" Takano stepped up next to him and put his hand on Onodera's shoulder.

"Please don't," Onodera brushed his hand away. "It's okay, but just don't."

Takano dropped his hand. "Fine, you're not upset. Whatever. But you can't deny that you will never find the right way to tell them why you don't already have a 'nice girl' in your life, and it will never be the right time. Your parents will always see me as just your boss and things will never be different."

Onodera looked up at him and his expression was distant now, and he looked at him with such a feeling in his eyes it was alarming. "Things change. They aren't always what they are."

"…Maybe," the other agreed reluctantly.

"We should get ready for bed." Takano watched Onodera walk off towards the bathroom, hoping that everything was fine, but he couldn't help but feel that a gap he had closed a long time ago between them hadn't just come back―it had widened.

Onodera came back out of the bathroom in his sleeping clothes and he went straight to the bed, taking the right side as usual―but not as usual, he curled up under the covers immediately with his back to the other side of the bed. Takano watched him and sighed, he had dressed for bed in the bedroom area and he also got into bed now.

He turned to face Onodera, and he wanted to say something but he knew he couldn't really understand the situation Onodera had always been in. He had always found arranged marriages silly but he knew it was not the case with Onodera's mother. It was easy to want to say something, but actually saying anything was a more difficult task.

So, deciding not to say a word, Takano sighed, rolled over, and went to sleep.

Takano blinked tiredly at the ceiling above him, feeling an odd sensation that told him something was wrong. In the fog of his sleep, there were memories floating in the back of his head that he hadn't thought of in years but that were so clear to him―as if they had happened just yesterday. He had been dreaming of something that woke him up with a start, and he took a deep breath and tried to brush it away as he sat up. For whatever reason, when he looked around he felt confused, a strange sense in his stomach that told him he was not seeing what he expected to see next to him.

"Takafumi," he sighed and shook his head, laying back down and draping himself over his boyfriend with a pout.

"Hm…?" the other man rolled over and embraced him in his arms. "Masamune? What's the matter?"

Takano shook his head again and coiled his arms around his lover. "I just… I had the strangest dream."

Yokozawa looked at him with dazed confusion but he rubbed his boyfriend's back and closed his eyes tiredly. "Of what?"

"Who," Takano corrected him. "It was a boy… a boy with emerald green eyes."

…I make poor life choices at 1AM but okay let's do this… Drop a review and tell me what you think!