Set after the season 2 finale, so spoilers for the finale. This goes with my other short fic, Retreat.
They agreed they would take turns sitting up with Leo, and it's Raph's turn, so Donnie is supposed to be resting.
Raph was very insistent about that, actually, just barely restraining himself from shouting, but Donnie can't sleep, so he pretends to fall asleep and then carefully nudges Mikey away and sneaks out onto the porch. He does a good job of staying silent, too, if he does say so himself: avoiding the squeaky floorboards and using his hand to muffle the scrape of the latch, and fortunately he'd taken a moment to oil the hinges earlier.
Out on the porch of the farmhouse, the cold nips at his skin, but Donnie doesn't care. It almost feels—not good, exactly, but satisfying somehow. It's a distraction, at least, from the way his arm still aches. He perches on the porch railing and looks out at the darkness, so much darker than the city. The driveway off to the left and curves around further in that direction, and there are a ton of trees between the road and the house, and the nearest house is at least a mile and a half away, April said, which means there's nothing, nothing in front of him but darkness. It's a cloudy night, so there's not even any moon.
But he's not alone out there. The woods are full of a million sounds. Donnie tries to count how many different species he hears, but he can't be sure. It's too far outside his experience, too many things he's only read about and never witnessed. A lot of it is just rustling, though he can hear the call of an owl clearly.
From inside, he also hears the creak of that one squeaky floorboard, and then a slight rattle as the door opens. Donnie grits his teeth at the sound of footsteps on the porch. He came out here to be alone, after all, but diving off into the dark woods alone would be just stupid, a truly fantastic way to get lost and scare everyone else, and he'd made enough mistakes for one forty-eight-hour period, thanks.
The voice that comes is totally unexpected, though.
"Hey," says Casey. "You doin' all right?"
Donnie blinks, disarmed. He'd expected one of his brothers, somehow, and the surprise loosens his tongue. "Is any of us?"
Casey snorts. "I guess not."
Donnie almost smiles at that. There's something refreshing about someone actually admitting it. "I just... couldn't sleep."
"Yeah, I get that." There's a shuffle, and Casey leans against the wide post at the end of the railing.
"I'm sorry about your family," Donnie adds softly.
"Yeah, well." There's a barely visible movement in the darkness, maybe a shrug. "I'm not counting 'em out yet. Joneses are tough." His tone is a little forced, a little too bright, but Donnie gets why.
"I guess so," he says.
"You guys are tough, too. Don't count anyone out yet."
It's nice of him to say that, except they watched Sensei fall, and Leo's gotten the worst beating any of them have ever had, and he won't even wake up yet. Donnie scowls into the darkness, his eyes burning. If only he hadn't argued, if only they hadn't separated, if only, if only, if only...
"Besides," Casey says, "I heard the Turtle Mech was freakin' amazing."
Donnie shakes his head, hardly even realizing he's muttering under his breath. He clears his throat and speaks up. "No... no. Leo was right. It was too risky. We shouldn't have..." He trails off, because he's been over it and over it, spent the whole silent drive up to the cabin going over it, and he's still not sure what they should have done differently.
"Kraang tore up more of the city than we did," Casey says. We, even though he wasn't in the mech in the first place. "You gave that big Kraang weirdo something its own size to pick on. That's pretty rad."
"I guess," Donnie mumbles. The encouragement is a little heartening, though he's not sure it should be. Part of him wants to resent the solidarity, even wants to resent Casey's presence, but even the resentment gives him a little twist of shame and guilt. Casey hasn't done anything wrong. He's being a friend, right here, and it's even helping, in spite of everything. "Thanks," Donnie says quietly.
The door behind them opens, suddenly enough that Donnie starts. He whirls, balance wavering, to hear Raph's furious whisper: "What the hell are you two doing?"
"Relax, man, we're just talking," says Casey.
Donnie says, "Is Leo—"
"He's where he's supposed to be," Raph hisses. "In bed. What's your excuse?"
Donnie shrugs, wilting under his brother's glare. "Couldn't sleep."
"Inside. Now. You gotta rest, or so help me, I will make Mikey sit on you until you do."
Donnie doesn't have the will to resist, not now. He slides off the railing and mutters, "That wouldn't be very restful, you know." He can totally picture it: Mikey would sit there whispering are you asleep every ten seconds.
"So don't make us do it," Raph returns, stepping aside.
Donnie shuffles past, but hesitates in the doorway. "Raph, I don't know—" I don't know what to do. I don't know how to get Sensei back. I don't know how to defeat the Kraang or stop the mutations. I don't know what to say when Leo wakes up.
Raph shoves him inside, but the push is a lot more gentle than it could have been. "Sleep first. Thought you were smart enough to figure that out."
"Yeah. Okay," Donnie mumbles. Part of him is surprised that Raph isn't yelling at him more. He's not sure what to do with this mother-hen thing. But it's sort of... nice, anyway. Raph's still got his back.
He returns to his spot on the floor, listening as Casey goes up the creaking stairs and Raph goes back to Leo's bedroom. Donnie sighs and tries to get settled. Mikey immediately rolls over and flops an arm and a leg over Donnie, mumbling, "It's okay, ice cream kitty." Donnie rolls his eyes and sighs again, but Mikey just snuggles up to him more. There's no point in trying to get free when he's like this. Instead, Donnie stares at the ceiling for a long time, but it's warmer, even comforting, with his brother there.
Eventually, he finds sleep.