DISCLAIMER: I do not own La Corda D' Oro. I also credit Ariel Lin for her song "Fireflies" from which I had the idea for the plot of this story.
A/N: I recommend that you listen/watch the video. Here's the link: watch?v=iizJNOCzr9M
~Fireflies~
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Some happiness is not easy to forget.
And here I am starting my own journey to happiness.
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Life, I've been told, or so I've learned, is like a journey: seemingly unwinding and endless, yet is actually full of challenges and disappointments. Along the way, we fall in love, fall in hate, we laugh and cry the next moment. We learn to be broken and break people's hearts in return, then we forgive and move on. For others, they forgive, but not forget. Never.
It was like this path right in front of us, never-ending. But as infinite as it seemed, I knew that at some point we had to stop. This pavement would end and we'd reach our destination. And compared to life, I liked this journey much better because it was vibrant and full of life... thanks to the man beside me. He had soft apple green hair that flew with the wind, bright eyes that shone with laughter, and a huge contagious smile that reverberated with life.
"Kaho-chan." He suddenly stopped humming and caught my attention. Maybe he caught me stealing glances.
"What is it?"
He reached for my hand while his eyes never left the road. He gave it a light squeeze and smiled. "Nothing. I'm just happy you're here with me right now."
I smiled back at him and squeezed him in return. He just doesn't know how happy he makes me. How, that even being in a relationship with him for two years, he still makes my heart flutter every time he says those things. He continued humming the tune so dear so to us and stopped only when he reached the train station.
Kazuki eagerly unbuckled his seatbelt and planted a kiss on my forehead. "Stay here. I'll be right back." And then he hurried inside.
The train station we were in was small compared to the ones in the big cities because it was found in the countryside. From where he had parked the car, I could see passengers waiting, others leaving, for their loved ones. Today, Kazuki was going to see his high school buddy and he told me to tag along. He said it would be great if the two most important people in his life, aside from his family, would meet: namely his best friend and girlfriend. So I agreed.
Soon enough, I saw him engulf another guy in a tight embrace. He was a bit taller than him in stature, and wore green plaid polo. That's probably the best friend he was talking about. I tried to suppress a giggle because even if I wasn't looking, his energetic voice was just too loud. "I missed you so much!" I even heard him say. So I decided to give them the little privacy they needed and stretched my arms and legs for a bit. The one-hour drive has gotten to me so quickly.
I remembered the time when he and I first met. It was a mess. But every time it comes to my mind, I figured it has become a beautiful memory.
When I was revisiting my old house for the nth time that week, I was stunned to find the door unlocked, and the keys I always hid under the doormat gone. With my curiosity kicking in, I decided to take a peek in the house, when suddenly I felt someone else's presence behind me. When turned, I saw a guy standing behind me and obviously copying what I was doing. I shock, I yelled at his face and instantly got inside the house, slammed the door shut and locked him out. He looked so funny back then, holding a girlish umbrella with laces plus that astonished expression on his handsome face. And then, he started frantically knocking and said, "Wait a second! Miss, that's my house! Open up! You're inside my house! Please open the door!" And right then I knew that he was new to this place. He didn't know I owned it.
I was hostile. I remembered how fidgety he almost was while introducing himself to me. But even so, he emitted an aura that told everyone he was a bright, cheerful young man with an adventurous spirit and a kind heart. Even though I was always sullen and sour and angry all the time, he put up with me. He even helped out with my newly opened shop. And during the day he finally confessed his feelings, he gave me a small bottle of his precious fireflies. I remember being slightly uneasy and a bit nostalgic because his gift reminded me of someone else. But I convinced myself that Kazuki was different, and that it was his sentiments that always counted.
Finally, when I noticed he and the other guy stopped chatting, I looked to their direction again and this time, I saw Kazuki jogging towards me with that huge smile. He opened the door and said, "Jan!" as he side-stepped to present the person behind him.
I was about to greet our visitor with a smile, only to find it gone the moment it appeared. My heart stopped. When I locked eyes with him, I found that there was a subtle hint of confusion on his face. The tall guy looked at Kazuki for a moment—perhaps for a confirmation—before nodding back and finally acknowledging me. with no other choice left to do, I nodded in return and never dared to look at him again.
Because at that moment, I felt the pit of my stomach churn with so many feelings.
It was Ryoutaro Tsuchiura, my long lost love.
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"Kaho-chan, this is Ryoutaro, by high school best buddy." Kazuki said and tapped him by the hand when we were going home that same afternoon. We smiled at each other then looked to different places instantly. I pulled my arms towards my body as to not touch his skin since the three of us were all cramped up in the front seat of Kazuki's pick up car. "I missed you so much!" he chirped.
Why did he have to come back here anyway? Because of what he had done, he has placed both of us in a situation that was almost strangely awkward.
It was odd. Because for as far as I can remember, I never felt that way everytime Ryoutaro was around me. He was pretty much like Kazuki. Both of them are good at cheering me up, except that now, he had the opposite effect. What I feel now each time he comes to my mind is just sadness brought upon by an incident a couple of years ago.
Ryoutaro was leaving that time, and there was nothing both of us could do to stop it. He said it was urgent that he go back to Tokyo. The reason he gave was vague, sending my mind in a confused state. It was during that day that he was scheduled to leave. I remember myself sitting at the edge of the bed—the same bed we shared on cold nights (note: just in case your imagination goes wild, NOTHING ever happened. We just slept)—and watched him gather his belongings. I reached for his passport sitting inches from me while he wordlessly packed his things. I ran a finger on his picture and imagined, for a moment, what my future would be without him by my side.
I tried to stop the tears from forming at the corners of my eyes. I shouldn't cry. I agreed to this. I agreed to let him go. But why is it that I found myself wanting to stop him from his departure? I didn't want him to go. And perhaps it was because he felt my sentiments that he suddenly wrapped his arms around me. Almost immediately, I felt myself hugging back as if I were holding on for dear life. And in fact I was. He was my life.
The next thing I know, he was standing at the far end of the road with a yellow cab now on standby. Still, I urged myself not to cry to make things easier for him. It was for the first time that the small distance across the road seemed so large I thought it was impossible to reach him. He smiled at me, but I wasn't even able to return it. I simply locked eyes with him for the last time and before long, he was gone.
It was only then that my feet broke into a run. I was confused and shocked at the same time that I almost forgot the reason why I was so hyped up. All I knew was that if I didn't run, something I held dear would be gone forever. And in fact, I had just lost it.
With heavy hearts and flooding tears, I went back inside the house and felt the emptiness I only half expected to happen. I slumped next to a wall and cried my eyes out, only realizing that he left me not a single thing for me to remember him by. Not even that empty little bottle of fireflies. Like he erased himself completely out of my life.
Except that I was the only one thinking that way, because that wasn't his intention. It was when I gazed at the white wall next to me that I realized that thing. I noticed the scribbles we made together with red permanent marker and allowed myself to be flooded with memories.
Yes. That was what he intended for me. He wants me to know that he'll always be a part of me, and I, him.
"Ryou, let's go surfing later, okay?" Kazuki's cheerful voice broke me out of my reverie. "I really missed you a lot!" he followed up and patted his best friend's hand. I surprised myself when a giggle escaped my lips.
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So I spent the whole afternoon tagging along with them on their escapades. They didn't have the chance to go to the beach because the weather suddenly changed. So we headed to the shop instead and there both of them surfed. Literally. They placed two surfing boards on the table and pretended as if they were with the surging waves. It made me laugh, really, as if nothing else mattered. We talked for a bit, and then they danced, then played and jammed together with their musical instruments: Kazuki with the trumpet and Ryoutaro with the keyboard.
Still, the fact that Ryoutaro hasn't said anything as of now and the uncertainty that he might actually really scares me. Is he hiding his true intentions by just playing along with my boyfriend? What does he want, really? Does he want me back? Does he even care still? Did he know his best friend and his ex-girlfriend are together now? Whatever it is that he wants right now, I don't have a single clue. If he used to be a bit easy to read before, those days are gone anymore.
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Kazuki's POV
The first time I saw Kahoko, I was captivated.
She wasn't the delicate and demure type at all, even scolding me for no reason when I caught her peeping into my house. She must have been utterly embarrassed because it was my place, and she made it seem as if it were hers.
Unfortunately, she was right. The small dainty white house was hers all along, and she proved it by showing me the red scribbles I didn't even notice on the wall. She seemed uninterested, but still I tried my best to introduce myself in the most formal way as possible. Instead, she sighed exasperatedly and rose from her seat. She pointed towards the small writings and remembered her saying, "Don't wipe this off." And walked out. It puzzled me why those markings would even matter, but I didn't ask. Also, I thought that would be the first and last time I would ever see her, but I was wrong.
She kept coming back every single day only to stare at the white wall. Sometimes she came in announced, but mostly the other way around. I guess she didn't care because she owned the place anyway. Once when my curious nature finally kicked in, I asked her why it was so important, but she didn't reply like I had expected. Perhaps I asked something too personal, so I didn't ask again. However, it doesn't mean that I'm not curious. Because honestly, oftentimes I would wonder if the scribbles were the cause of her un-smiling face.
Eventually though, we became friends. At least, that's what I thought so. She started to talk to me, first with only a few words, until her responses became a bit longer. In a way, she was more entertaining and a bit kinder, but never gentler. Her hostility when the first time we met was still there, though I could tell it has diminished... a bit. Maybe I was starting to gain her trust. Still, it was not enough for her to open up to me.
One day during work, I was joking with her like I usually did when she took me by surprise. I saw her smile. For the first time. And I couldn't help but marvel how more beautiful it made her look. Because of that, I decided to have a little celebration after work, to which, both I unintentionally got drunk. I was actually planning the other way around so I could have her spill about the scribbles, but that didn't happen.
What happened was I ended up giving her a small bottle of fireflies. I ended up confessing her feelings to her. I didn't remember how she reacted, but the next day, she was easily shy and embarrassed. When I went home from work one day, I found the scribbles on the wall completely erased, and even caused me to panic. I was about to rush to her house when she suddenly appeared from the kitchen, holding a white cloth stained with red powder. "D—don't worry about it." She said and left abruptly. Eventually, she fell in love with me and she became my girlfriend.
Still, though, I never had the chance to know about those scribbles. But I guess it doesn't really matter now, does it? Because I saw her smile again, and she's by my side where I can keep her close. Where I can protect her. That's the most important thing.
Suddenly, I felt a soft tap on my shoulder and saw Ryoutaro motioning towards Kahoko's sleeping form on my shoulder. The sky was dark, with only the stars and the light from inside the house to illuminate us. We were at the garden, just simply talking about what my best friend and I missed for the last two years. I smiled at her angelic face and adjusted her so she would not be disturbed. Perhaps she was exhausted from going along wherever Ryou and I wound up.
"I never thought I would meet her." I began to say. "She has a very strong personality, so she isn't the tender or the delicate type. But she brought love to my side." I held Kahoko's hand in mine and saw at the corner of my eye that my best friend was staring intently at the both of us now. "And I plan to stay with her forever."
He smiled as he tapped me on the back. I must look really mushy in his eyes right now, so I tapped him back on his shoulder. "Good for you," was his last statement before I woke the sleeping form beside me to witness the fireflies overwhelm the three of us.
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Kahoko's POV
The very next day, Kazuki and I accompanied Ryoutaro back to the train station. It sent my boyfriend's soul crumbling because it had only been a day and his best friend was suddenly leaving. I didn't know what they promised each other, but I found myself agreeing with Kazuki... in my mind, at least. I mean, whatever his reason is for coming back, I don't have to deal with it anymore because he was going back to Tokyo. Any chance of reconciliation or clearing things up was obviously whisked away now because of his abrupt decision.
"You came back here searching for your long-lost love, didn't you?" I heard Kazuki, who was walking side by side with my ex, say in front of me. I almost couldn't believe what I just heard. So he really was looking for me. At that moment, I felt my heart stir with emotions. No, this can't be. Kazuki probably just misunderstood whatever it is that his best friend had told him earlier on. "So why are you leaving so soon?" He continued, earning him a glance from the taller guy.
"Well, I did find her." He replied. And again, I tried to act nonchalant despite the fact that I was really surprised. So this is when he intends to destroy everything? When he finally leaves? Before I could say anything else in my mind, he continues: "In fact, I lost her forever."
With that, I stood beside Kazuki and together, we waited for the train with my heart beating loudly in my ears. So he was letting me go. I didn't know what I felt right then. Like I've been lifted so high up in the air. And then, the train came and took him away. He gave his best friend a hug, before turning to me and took me in his arms.
I squeezed him in return before he went inside the train. The next thing I knew, I was watching him leave again. Although this time, with both our hearts lifted up. I watched the train go with Kazuki right by my side, my fingers tangled with his.
When the train was no more, my boyfriend walked ahead with me and it was only then that I noticed a small note stuck behind my hair. It was from Ryou.
It read:
Any chance to meet again is a form of happiness. No matter where you will be, who you are with or what the result is, it's nothing but happiness.
I'm happy I saw you again. Know that I love you so, and that I want you to be happy with my best friend.
Yours,
Ryou
I folded it neatly and tucked it inside my pocket and hurried towards my boyfriend who was waiting for me.
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Love changes like the happy light arches of the fireflies...
~Fireflies||END~
Dedicated to tentsubasa. Sorry if it took so long.