"Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together."
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BROOKE'S POV
Pasadena, California
September 16, 2013
8:37 AM
It has been my ritual to open my computer and log in to my Yahoo Messenger every morning, when I wake up. The doorbell- like sound of it was music to my ears. And yes, there was the sound! Apparently, someone invited me to his Messenger list. I could immediately tell it was a boy with the look of his ID: heartbrokenjock3. I wondered how he knew my Yahoo ID: myemptyheart3. And we even have the same number. I don't know how, but the number 3 just sounds familiar to me and it seems like it meant a lot to me. Anyways, the guy sounds nice so I approved his invitation. Luckily, he was online so I clicked his ID and started chatting away.
myemptyheart3: Hi! I just approved your invitation. Where did you find my ID?
heartbrokenjock3: Hi! Thank you for approving it. I found it in a chat room somewhere. I was about to invite you when you suddenly logged out. What's up with your ID? You sound….sad and incomplete. LOL!
myemptyheart3: Well, I don't really know. It's just everyday I wake up and feel that something's missing. I guess you were right when you said incomplete.
heartbrokenjock3: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked that. I guess it's too personal to ask. But actually, I feel the same way. A lot of things have happened to me the past few years. And I haven't gotten over it, hence, the ID.
myemptyheart3: Is it matters of the heart? I could help you if you want.
heartbrokenjock3: Well, I think I could trust you with this. It's about my first, and probably my last, love. She left me right after graduation, without an explanation, without a goodbye. I never got over her; I still love her until now. I was a mess ever since she left. Good thing I have my friends and family to help me. No one can and will replace her in my heart. She's my Cheery, the only one who could put a smile on my face even when I'm down. I actually want to see her but I don't know where to find her.
myemptyheart3: Wow! That's hard, huh. I don't know if I could help. But I could feel you. You know what, I feel like I have experienced it, but I haven't really. I suggest you let your feelings out, cry if you have to. Or better yet, put it into writing. It will help ease the pain.
heartbrokenjock3: As a matter of fact, I have written out my feelings into poems.
myemptyheart3: Good! I'd like to read it, if it's fine with you.
heartbrokenjock3: Tell you what, just give me your address and I'd mail it to you. That could be your personal copy, and you could keep it.
myemptyheart3: Really? That's so nice of you. Well, here's my address: 17 Glendale, Pasadena, California.
heartbrokenjock3: Ok, got it! It's nice to have someone to share my heart problems with. LOL!
myemptyheart3: Well, you seem like a nice guy so I'm helping you out. I didn't know you're interested in writing.
heartbrokenjock3: I've always wanted to be a writer. I promised my Cheery that I'd write a book about my life, and she'll be in it. When she left, that dream also went away. Now, I could only write poems about her, but it hurts so much when I write, 'cause it's mostly about her.
myemptyheart3: Look on the bright side. At least you're able to pour your heart out, and not keep them bottled up inside. Everyday, when I feel that emptiness in my heart, I always sit by my window and write my feelings. I also have poems about them.
heartbrokenjock3: Can I read it? You could mail it to me. I wanna know your thoughts.
myemptyheart3: I don't know. Well, I guess I could trust you with those poems. What's your address?
heartbrokenjock3: Alright! I could help you too, you know. Well my address is: 23 Berkeley, San Francisco, California. I'll have my poem mailed to you later this afternoon.
myemptyheart3: Ok, me too! So how are you now? I mean, after "Cheery" left.
heartbrokenjock3: Well, I've been getting better. One day at a time. But sometimes, I can't help but wonder how she's doing, where she is, or who she's with. I've once told her at a beach party: I'm the guy for you. But I think I failed in letting her see that. I really wish I could bring back time.
myemptyheart3: That's awful! Ummm…I gotta go. Something came up. I'll talk to you tomorrow. I still have to mail my poem for you.
heartbrokenjock3: That sucks. Well, it's ok! I still have to mail mine. Bye! See ya!
heartbrokenjock3 has logged out)
In the middle of my conversation with heartbrokenjock3my head suddenly hurt. I hate it! I've been out of the hospital for 2 months already and my head still hurts. Damn it! I wish I didn't have that freakin' amnesia.
When heartbrokenjock3 told me about his and Cheery's incident at a beach party, a vision suddenly flashed in my mind. There was me and a blonde guy wearing a blue polo. He said to me: I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis. You'll see. It sounded so familiar but the guy's facial features were blurred and so vague. Good thing, the hurting stopped. Lately, I have been having these visions. The doctor it's normal. It's a sign that some of my memories are coming back. That should be a good thing, but it usually is not because my head hurts when that happens. I wish those memories won't come back anymore so I don't have to suffer. I have a new life and I'm ready to start anew. Screw the past!
Oh shoot! I still have to mail my poem for him.
