Blaine had dreading this feeling for some time now. It had finally hit him, he was all alone. Sure he could talk to Kurt over Skype every night but that didn't help. In fact it made him feel worse. Every night after speaking to him he would head to his bed and cry himself to sleep. Every morning he would wake up and his eyes would be puffy that he would have to use makeup to hide it so no one could see how truly upset he was. He would put on a fake smile and pretend everything was okay but slowly inside his heart was breaking. He hadn't even told Kurt this.

The buzzing of his phone woke him up, he slowly got off his bed and walked over to his desk. He was sure if it was Kurt it would be set him off again. He looked down as he rubbed his eyes to remove the sleep in them before picking up the phone to see what the message was.
"Sebastian" He said as he read the name on the screen. He walked back over to his bed before throwing himself on it landing facedown with his phone still in his hands. He let the phone slip from his hand to the side of him before letting himself drift back to sleep. His dreams that were once joyful and beautiful were now dark and depressing. He would see Kurt but he wasn't with Blaine now, he was in an apartment with someone Blaine didn't know. Blaine was pretty sure he was a model, but they were kissing and that's the point Blaine would wake up every night. He took a few breaths before wiping the sweat off his forehead. He slowly turned himself on the bed, moving his neck from side to side. He picked up his phone that had been resting next to him on the bed and checked the time. 3 in the morning he sighed as he throw himself back down with the back of his head landing on the pillow. He decided to see what the message from Sebastian said.
"Hey Blaine I know we don't talk now since what I did to your eye. But I think we should put the past behind us. Let's get a Coffee sometime and see if we can be friends" Blaine laughed for a second, he hated Sebastian with every cell in his body but something inside of him made him feel happy for the first time since Kurt's departure. He hadn't been able to speak to anyone from New Directions as they didn't seem to understand, yes some of them were in the same boat as him but somehow they seemed well, okay with it. Maybe it was because Blaine's only reason for going to McKinley was because of Kurt to begin with and the place still terrified him to the core. The last time he had been to a school like this he was beaten up so bad that well he didn't like thinking about it. Sure New Directions were his friends but somehow he still felt out of place like he had randomly walked in and joined a crowd of people he could swear were just talking about him. He had tried to talk to Mr Shue but he was of no help, and even Burt. God he loved that guy like he was his own father, so much he wished he was but since he was now a Congressman he was always travelling and had very little time that he felt awful for bugging him. Every time he saw him he had put on a happy face but behind his hazel eyes were sadness. He would be invited every time he was back in town for dinner, he was pretty sure Carol suspected how he felt but she never brought it up which he was glad about. He slowly brought up a new message on his phone, god he was going to hate his decision in the morning but at the moment he didn't care.
"Hey sure why not. Half 4 at the Lima bean?" He wrote before pressing send. He placed the phone back down and shut his eyes.

Blaine was woken up by the sound of his alarm clock, it took every part of him not pick it up and throw it across the room. After turning it off he decided it was best to get up. He slowly pulled himself up from the bed and walked to his full length mirror. He was still wearing yesterday's outfit. He sighed for a second before deciding that it was best to take a shower. Once he was done he came out and laid all his clothes out on the bed. He choose some simple gray trousers that finished just before his ankle a white shirt with cropped off arms and a gray blue vest. After putting them on he walked over to one of his draws that he kept all his bowties in. He looked in unsure which one to wear before deciding on a simple black one. He then walked back to where his phone was on the bed and checked it to find he had received a message back from Sebastian which simply read
"Sure" He quickly packed his bag ready for the day before he sent a good morning text to Kurt knowing he wouldn't get a reply until sometime late in the afternoon.

Like every other day now at McKinley he found himself in the same routine. Going to each class spending lunch listening to Artie talk before wheeling him to his next class.
"Blaine, are you ok? You seem very distant." Artie asked as he looked back the boy pushing his chair. Blaine just shrugged his shoulder before deciding he had to give him some sort of answer.
"Just one of them days I guess." He said as he wheeled him into the classroom and finding the desk they shared.
"Are you sure I mean since Kurt left you seem..."
"Please don't talk about Kurt." Blaine chocked trying not to let his emotions get the better of him while he was in public. He pulled out his seat and sat himself down while taking his book out of his bag at the same time. He went to open it to find a picture of him and Kurt falling out. He quickly picked it back up and stuffed it back in his bag with Artie watching. After smiling back at him he started to carry on with his work hoping they wouldn't speak.

The bell rang and the day was finally over he quickly ran to his locker throw in some of his books before making his way out to his car. He had meant to be going to Glee club but he decided to ditch today's meeting since he was meeting up with Sebastian. He found a space on the car park next to the Lima bean and parked before making his way into the building.
"Blaine" A voice said as he turned to see Sebastian get up and walk over to him.
"Hi" Blaine replied as he felt an arm suddenly go round him before they he went and sat down as Sebastian went back up and got some drinks. Blaine started to think this was a bad idea but he couldn't just walk out now, sure one coffee couldn't hurt could it? Suddenly Blaine heard his phone ring. He quickly pulled it out to see a text from Kurt. Just as he was about to reply Sebastian returned with their drinks.
"So how are the Warblers?" Blaine asked.
"Good, getting ready for sectionals but are you sure you can't come back." Sebastian asked he took a sip of his drink.
"I don't know I mean I can't keep moving schools every year." Blaine explained.
"Oh come on, what do I have to do to convince you?"
"I'm not going back to Dalton Sebastian. I can't there..."
"You've broken up with him haven't you?"
"What...No of course not."
"You're lonely then" Sebastian said as a smirk appeared on his face but Blaine didn't notice he knew what he said was true but he didn't want to admit it.
"I..I.."
"Okay we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I can understand how hurt and alone you must be. Tell you what, do you want to come round mine play some video games and stuff. I promise nothing more will happen." He said as he pulled his bag over his shoulder. Blaine was left speechless he knew he was most likely waking into a trap but something in the back of his head told him he should. Maybe for once Sebastian had changed his ways I mean ever since what happened with Dave there was a chance right.

Blaine pulled onto a long road with Sebastian in the passenger seat telling him directions. Part of him started to feel uneasy but he couldn't just tell him to get out. After a while they pulled up to a big house which even Blaine was impressed.
"You like?" Sebastian said as he closed the car door and started to walk up his path.
"Like, it's amazing." Blaine's eyes grew wide as he took in every part of the house. He knew his house was big but this he didn't know what to look at first.
"And we have it all to ourselves." Said Sebastian as he slowly opened the door letting Blaine in before quickly grabbing his hand and started pulling him up the stairs.
"What...what are you doing?" Blaine said as he tried to pull back but the other boy was stronger. Before being pulled into a room, Sebastian's room. Sebastian let go of his hand as he quickly threw off his blazer and walked over to his CD player turning it on. There was a giant window that had a door in the middle that led out to a balcony, a giant bed in the centre of the room looking out of it.
"I can make you feel much better Blaine." Sebastian said as he grabbed onto Blaine's hips. Blaine looked down as he pushed him away.
"Don't" He said as he turned away but again Sebastian grabbed hold of him spinning him around.
"You want to, I can see it in your eyes."
"I have Kurt and I love him." Blaine said he wanted to run but his legs wouldn't let him. Why couldn't he run, this was Sebastian the guy who almost blinded him, the guy who always after him, the guy who wanted to injure his boyfriend so why couldn't he run. Sebastian raised his hands attaching them onto his bowtie. Slowly pulling it off him and letting it fall to the ground. Blaine just watched as it fell. Sebastian started to kiss his neck as Blaine let him. Images of Kurt flashed in his brain. He looked back at Sebastian but it wasn't him anymore it was Kurt. A smiling happy Kurt. Was everything with Sebastian just a dream? Was he really with Kurt? He watched the lips moved over his. It was Kurt, and god he felt happy again.

Blaine woke up to the sound of snoring. He let his eyes open slowly as they adjusted to the morning light. He looked around in the strange room. This wasn't his room or Kurt's. He looked to the side of him to find a naked Sebastian sleeping on his front. He suddenly looked back at the wall, he was in shock. Why was he there? He slowly looked at himself he was naked to. He jumped out the bed as quickly as he could and found his clothes that were around the room. After quickly getting changed he quietly left the room, legged it down the stairs and out the door. As soon as he got in the car he started to cry. Had he just cheated on Kurt and why couldn't he remember? He started to bang his head off the steering wheel.
"What if he spiked my drink?" Blaine shouted still banging his head as memories from the night before started rushing through his brain. He was so convinced that Sebastian was Kurt last night. Was his mind playing tricks on him.
"I...I'm so sorry Kurt" Blaine cried.
He then spotted his watch, he quickly looked at it for a second. He was going to be late he had a plane to catch to New York in a few hours. All he wanted to do was cry. He rushed home as fast as he could and grabbed his bag before taking a taxi up to the airport.

The whole journey felt like a lifetime for Blaine, all he could think about what had happened and how could he even look Kurt in the eye. He felt like he was going to be sick. After landing the nerves got worse and he had to room to the bathroom to be sick it was that bad.
"Blaine" Kurt shouted as he saw him coming out the door from arrivals. He ran as quickly as he could into Blaine wrapping his arms around him as tightly as he could.
"God I've missed you." He said as Blaine took in Kurt's smell. For this one moment everything was fine, god what Blaine could do to live in this moment forever. Kurt slowly pulled away cupping Blaine's face in his hands. He could see the tears starting to form in his boyfriends eyes.
"Hey hey its okay, were together now" He said as he went and lent his forehead against his.
"I know, I know." Blaine replied as he looked into his eyes but a sense of guilt popped up. He couldn't look at him. Kurt quickly grabbed his hand and pulled him out to his waiting taxi.
"Are you ok?" Kurt asked as he got himself in the car followed by Blaine.
"I'm fine it's just probably the flying." Was the only response he could come up with. He never felt so awkward with Kurt. He suddenly felt like they were two strangers were forced to share a cab. Kurt moved himself closer to Blaine, so close he might as well been sitting in his lap but all Blaine could do was stare out the window.
"We have a double date tonight with Rachel and Finn." Kurt said as he made himself comfortable on Blaine's chest. Blaine slowly raised him around Kurt letting him do so. He wanted to just scream, to tell him the truth, beg for forgiveness anything but he knew that wouldn't happen. Once he told him Kurt wouldn't forgive him, hell even he wouldn't forgive himself. He decided to put it in the back of his mind for now.

They spent the rest of the day in Kurt's shared apartment. Just chilling and relaxing. Blaine had managed to put everything in the back of his head for now. He had even kept his phone turned off so he wouldn't get any messages from Sebastian. Finally it was time to get ready for the double date. They hadn't really planned much just a walk round the park maybe some dinner afterwards. Blaine pulled out some clothes for the night. As he got changed he looked in the mirror hating himself. He quickly took off the bowtie he had been wearing and threw it to the other side. He hated himself so much, just looking at himself made him feel sick.
"Blaine, are you ready we need to leave" Kurt said through the door
"Coming."

They had started there walk and not once had Kurt or Blaine spoken. Blaine was sure Kurt knew something was up and was dying to ask him but knew he would tell him in time. Rachel and Finn had gone off ahead leaving them.
"So how's McKinley?" Kurt said as he rubbed his hands together trying to start the conversation going.
"It's okay, classes are the same" Blaine replied as he looked out to the distance. He had to tell him it was now or never.
"Kurt" Blaine said as he stopped watching Kurt as he did the same.
"Yes"
"There is something I need to tell you and you're not going to like it and you're going to hate me"
"What is it?" Kurt said as he moved his head slightly looking Blaine in the eyes.
"I..I.. slept with Sebastian and I'm so sorry Kurt, please forgive me. I..I" Blaine said as he saw Kurt's face turn into shock. He tried to move forward towards him but Kurt put his hands over his mouth shaking his head in disbelief before walking away from Blaine.