Chapter 1- No Business Like No Business

Artemis Fowl could tell that this young man coming before him was a bit full of himself. He was also headstrong, had a semi-egomania, and loved power. This man didn't even need to say a single word. Artemis could perceive it simply on his actions. He was smart like that.

This was alright, however, because this man was doing business with him. His record was clean as a newly-scrubbed window. After his run-in with the madman from Chicago, Jon Spiro, Artemis triple-checked perpetual buyers. Even with his new scanner, he couldn't find a single thing.

Either this man was really nice, Artemis thought, or really careful.

As he drew nearer, Artemis could see a few other details. His suit was a polyester, custom made, tuxedo, to add a bit of fanciness. The silver Bentley outside was, in fact, not driven by him, as the young man was scarcely fifteen- practically Artemis' age. He was English, from the clothing to the posture.

"Glad we could finally meet, Master Fowl," the man said. "I'm Damian Skylar, of Skylar Software. When I heard of your new innovation, I couldn't resist."

"Skylar?" Artemis questioned. "Haven't you been sixth in the running for the past two years?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Damian replied, "but this was much better than twentieth, as it was originally. And after Dell and Verizon are accounted for, most of the other companies are hacks who will soon declare bankruptcy. I play smart, Master Fowl. Now, enough of that. I trust you and your family are well?"

"Yes they are. " In fact, most of the family was out. Angeline Fowl and Artemis Fowl, Senior, were experiencing a new opera in Dublin's new opening house. Beckett and Myles Fowl were being babysat by their nanny at a beach house. Only Butler was still there, and he was being stealthy, in case of dispute. The perfect time. "Your's are well too, I presume?"

Here Damian averted Artemis' glance. "Unfortunately, no." he spoke. "They've been dead for two years now."

"Ah. Sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's quite fine. You didn't know. But, in any case, may we begin?"

"Of course." Artemis pulled out a briefcase and set it onto the table. Then he undid the clasps and opened the box. He pulled out a gun; it looked like a Sig Sauer, similar to Butler's, but much more futuristic, with various knobs and screws, as well as a small computer screen on the side.

Damian looked uninterested. "Please, Fowl. I did not come across the sea to witness a gun. In any case, I wish not to commit violence to anyone. Or allow others to do so, for that matter."

"You would want this one, I'm sure," Artemis smiled his trademark vampire smile. "This is no ordinary gun. Have you ever heard of gene splicing?"

"I know of it."

"Well, I've done some tweaking on various sources. This is a splicing gun. It can add DNA to any plant in the world. But this isn't all. The added tweaks made this so you can add any animal DNA to anything. Even humans."

"Splicing! You lie," Damian glared. "That is impossible on such a scale."

"Is it?" Artemis zapped a common household azalea with a fly meandering on it. In mere moments, the azalea snapped up the fly. A small sizzling noise, presumably acid, was heard. Artemis winked at Damian. "An azalea crossbred with a Venus Fly Trap. Not impossible after all."

Damian was aghast. "Unbelievable. I make software other people have made that works for only ten years. You, without any workshop or industry, build a genetic gun the likes of which no one has ever seen. How?"

"I'm afraid that is trade secret." Artemis kept his secret within. He wasn't about to say he also got the idea from various fairy weapons and technology, but had built the device with his own materials. That he had bought from Skylar Software. He learns his lessons. Artemis didn't want to put the fairy race in jeopardy, especially not his close friends Holly Short and Mulch Diggums. Even if it meant an extra buck.

"I've got to have that. Let me examine it." Damian was hooked. This was an easy sale.

Damian fiddled around with the gun, looked at the settings on the computer. "There's a lot of DNA in this."

"Over 17,000 different kinds, Skylar," Artemis added. "Nothing like diversity."

"But, one question. What is the setting that reads 'Top Secret'?"

Drat, Artemis thought, the fairy DNA. As an experiment, he put the DNA in the gun, but never got the chance to try it.

"Just what it says. Top secret. You will need an eternity code to reach those features. Even with your tech, I doubt you can break it."

"Fowl, I am pretty excited for this device. Even with features that are locked, I am sold. How much?"

"Skylar, that device is extra rare. One-of-a-kind, at least until I make another one. I'll keep mine secret, and you can copy that as much as you'd like, provided there is no criminal transaction. In return…" Artemis smiled again.

"What?!" Damian was ecstatic, fanatical now.

"Two million Euro. Plus ten percent of sales."

"Done!" He throws a briefcase onto the table. "I would have done that in any case. But this transaction…" Damian was excited. He didn't even bother to take the suitcase back. He took the gun, stuffed it into his pocket, and left Fowl Manor so fast there was smoke.

"Quite a sale, quite a sale," Artemis murmured. "But was it wise? We'll see…"

Once inside his Bentley, Damian pulled out the gun again and adjusted the settings. Within moments, there was a small ding- a good one, the kind that activates stuff.

"Access approved," a small computer voice said.

Damian, the wiz at computer programming he was, decoded an eternity code in ten seconds.

After looking through the eight selections, he replaced the gun, and chuckled menacingly. This, he thought, was what he was looking for. This was the beginning of his total domination, what he called the Skylar Era.

…To be continued.